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Nyperold's Vast Collection of 'Azumanga Daioh!' Haikus
Teacher's chain comes off
Who is Nyperold?! When a student stops to help Takes the bike and rides Three sizes are a secret But it's the wrong room Good thing in a small package She's just ten years old?!? Yay, it's ready! Or is it Not cooking at all? Chihiro's helping Chiyo? Other way around And string figures, good at them Not tongue twisters, though Chiyo cowers at the front Tap power reduced Yay, it's ready! Cookies, cake! Don't tell them to wait! Vet, florist, stuffed toy vendor? Maybe really nice... So say all the other girls ...What was that cute thing? I'm in astronomy club. Would you be..." *runs off* Look, a doggie being walked! Stretch, and then go run Should I try to pet it? Yeah. What could it hurt— *CHOMP* "Maybe he was in a mood." "Did she have a fight?" Good mood? A second attempt Ends up the same way Hyper is her middle name Or just "Wildcat" Standing out in the hallway Not that teacher cares Then ten, fifteen, and twenty, At which point she falls Neither know the answer. Yay! Now she says they're tied A speedy return! Too bad No one was timing Starting with an advantage Moving mountains back Not for long; she falls behind She's the runner-up! But she comes from Osaka A new tsukkomi? Teacher expects Kansai-ben? Reluctantly done Takoyaki expected "Nandeyanen?" "YAY!" Paying attention in class? No. Busy saying it But it's after her hometown Now it's stuck for good Watch her wait at the crosswalk Whoops, it's red again... She's a super-smart student Not a smart aleck Soap slips, and handkerchief falls Now it's soaking wet In my eyes make me track 'em And miss everything Tomo pursues, swatting friends Before killing it Yukari cannot advise Too squeamish to help Chiyo is slightly faster Is she just too smart? Splitting into groups of six What? Ten million yen? Chiyo and Yomi set up Sakaki's great spike To be just like Sakaki Not to take her out Pegs the back of Chiyo's head Will she be okay? Osaka and Chiyo-chan Get their facials here Balanced badly, scaring them Until she sits down Tomo finds a nice surprise All her top three foods! Osaka pulls carefully Splits her chopsticks clean Osaka can't handle it Mischievous Yomi Now her mouth is burning up Then she has hiccups Now with plugged up ears and nose But it doesn't work The cup falls off, spilling juice Time for music class Playing a wind instrument Will you knock that off?!? Have stayed over two hours Will she die today? Please, Osaka, be afraid! Chiyo's not scary Isn't good at curing them That's when you're choking Punch in the solar plexus Just puts her in pain She has a folk remedy Just brew some kaki Holding your breath for a time Whoops, that went too fast And when that doesn't do it Pull on her tongue. Ow! Sounds a bit hokey, but still — Don't give it to me! What might be the problem here? Probably the brain Chiyo notices they've stopped But what was the cure? Except Chiyo has them now? Try it all again! Fish and mammals, so therefore Snails are insects? To instigate a punch line But they don't know it Connected, detachable? Could she get new ones? Osaka's shaken awake Hey! Don't fall asleep! Kurosawa-sensei gives her her new swimsuit Talks about going drinking Now is not the time Kurosawa's old nickname Don't use it at work But she can find everything ...The dictionary? Chiyo holds it up, but then is buried... again Outrank teachers easily In terms of classmates Any classmates from past grades Isn't that a shock that evolved into monsters ...It was made up, right? To tell about Yukari But Yukari sings Azumanga's only fan?! TOMO could do this! Says Tomo. Yet she is wrong. Wails, "I'm not stupid!" And sharing some deep wisdom. Chiyo is baffled. So many clever haikus About this weird show. Home to wildcats and trees And Sakaki's pet "But why?! They're so..." [a brief pause] "Go Team Seaslug!" "Yay..." Yet they will all still be friends Even with Tomo
"Nyamo" has three syllables? Nya. Mo. Only two. Sakaki believes he is Chiyo's real father. Tomo throws the keys away. Everyone is pissed.
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