Groin Attack: Web Original

Played for Comedy

  • In a (mercifully non-canon) comedic scene at the beginning of insideLG15's "An LG15 Wedding", lonelygirl15's Danielbeast is shot in the crotch by Lucy.
  • The last attack in the over the top Chris Harry, complete with giant shockwave.
  • If you have a penis as long as you are tall, don't display it to a high-ranking member of an asexual race.
  • Used repeatedly in the blog novel Fartago. Punching in the crotch seems to be Farta's preferred method of exacting retribution on Tago for any pain Tago causes Farta. Later justified as the pre-monolith tribe's method of exerting alpha male authority and punishing losing contenders, and also subverted in that the scene when the entire tribe lines up to punch a losing alpha male in the crotch is definitely not played for laughs. The cries of anguish of the abused loser depress Farta and Tago so much, they're unable to do anything but drink.
  • That Guy with the Glasses:
    • During the First Year Anniversary Team Brawl, The Angry Video Game Nerd hammers The Nostalgia Critic in the groin with a rapid-fire series of punches, causing him to reel backward and squeal out "I'm in pain!" in a high-pitched voice.
    • In a Nostalgia Critic Halloween episode, when the evil Teddy Ruxpin doll bites the Critic in the crotch because of his "mean" review on Teddy Ruxpin dolls.
      • Aaaand...there was the first Nerd vs Critic battle, when they fought with light sabers, but the Critic accidentally had his upside-down...
      • And during his series, video game confessions, where he's a bartender at a restaurant that sees many video game characters, Samus is apparently the giver of 2 crotch shots, and I mean "with the lazer gun" shot, to both Justin Bailey, and Leisure Suit Larry, because she hates it when people ogle her.
    • Bennett the Sage claws That Guy's nuts when That Guy tries to shoot Bennett for being such a sick bastard.
    • In Kickassia, the Critic finally got to do this to someone else, showing Lee one of the few downsides of being three-dimensional.
    • In Nostalgia Critic's review of Casper, an animated Casper infuriated by the Critic's panning of his film states that if he can't have a lasting impact on popular culture, he can still have one on his balls. Cue Groin Attack.
    • In the "You're A Dirty Rotten Bastard" Christmas Special, before meeting his guardian angel, the Critic clamps the poor guy's balls.
    • Happened a few times in Suburban Knights, especially with Malachite using magic to force Nostalgia Critic to hit himself in the balls, 15 times.
    • Nash is bitten in the groin by Domo-kun in the episode of What the Fuck Is Wrong with You? featuring JesuOtaku. (Groin attacks are a semi-regular appearance on the stories featured on WTFIWWY.)
    • Todd in the Shadows made a Top Ten List of movie groin shots. (In the spirit of Hypocritical Humor, he included Ow, My Balls! from Idiocracy, noting that it would have to be a hideously stupid world where audiences liked a show that was just a series of people being hit in the groin.) Also, he still missed one
    • After viewing Zardoz, Oancitizen takes the "Gun is Good, Penis is Evil" message too literally and goes to the bathroom to shoot off his groin. He somehow misses.
    • At the end of the Nostalgia Critic's review of Man of Steel, Superman opts to defeat Zod by Heat Vision castration instead of killing him.
  • In A Very Potter Musical, this is what happens to Snape during the snake attack death scene.
  • This 4EverMario video.
  • Turns up in the Gag Dub of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles by My Way Entertainment. The Shredder takes a swing at Splinter. Splinter coutnerattacks with a kick to the gut, making Shredder crumple over in pain. Xavier Nazario (voicing Shredder) quickly shouts out, "AUGH MY NUTS!" followed by Randy Hayes' Leonardo going, "Damn, somebody's nuts just got fucked up!"
    • And later on, when stranded with Splinter, Shredder runs off, going, "Man, fuck this shit, you're gonna kick me in the nuts! I'm off this motherfucker! Sheeeeit...fuck you!"
  • A party themed Happy Tree Friends Smoochie involves the character Nutty getting hit in the groin with a yo-yo. To make things worse, it continues to spin rapidly, with the frition causing smoke, resulting in him bursting into flames, with all the while Nutty screaming in agony. It's the first item on the list, the toy.
  • A series of videos on YouTube entitled "Kicked in the Nuts" involves a man in an orange afro wig kicking (supposedly) unsuspecting people in the nuts. They invariably react at first with pain and/or anger, until he points at the camera and informs them that "You've been kicked in the nuts!", at which point they're just happy to be on camera.
  • This episode of Rooster Teeth's Red vs. Blue does this to hilarious effect. It defies description, but not count: 7 separate groin attacks.
  • Inverted in Ultimate Muscle Roller Legend.
  • In the Super Mario Land series of web videos on Newgrounds, specifically the ending clip of the first episode before the credits, Mario attempts to go down a pipe, only for a fist to emerge from the pipe right underneath him, with Mario expressing a shocked face as the camera pans up to the sky to which a loud holler is bellowed.
  • A member of the LiveJournal comm Fanficrants, upon hearing about a fanfic in which characters used glue as personal lubricant, responded with "OW MY PENIS ... I DON'T EVEN HAVE A PENIS AND YET OW MY PENIS".
  • A variation occurs in I'm a Marvel... and I'm a DC, where the Joker straps a bomb to Green Goblin's crotch.
    Batman: "So, you went after Harley, huh?"
    Green Goblin: "Yeah. The Joker tends to go for the really obvious jokes, doesn't he?"
  • As part of a montage of Captain Hammer's jerkass humiliations against a helpless Dr. Horrible, he gives the doctor both a knee to the groin and an extremely painful-looking wedgie.
  • Lady Lumps VS Boy Bumps has hundreds of examples with characters from all kinds of different series. You can even fill out a template and ask the creator for your own character to be in an animation!
  • Used in None Piece to an unnamed pirate.
    (after being kicked in the balls) "My only weakness! MY BALLS! How did you know?!"
  • In The Horribly Slow Murderer with the Extremely Inefficient Weapon, when Jack tries to go after the Ginosangi with a buzzsaw, the Ginosangi makes him saw his own crotch instead. Even the Ginosangi cringes.
    • In "Save Jack", one of the options you can pick is Jack kicking the Ginnosaji in the crotch. Like every other attempt to stop the unstoppable Ginnosaji it doesn't end well.
  • Done to a headless (played by Miles) at the end of Spoony's Ultima Underworld 2 review.
  • RWBY:
    • In "Yellow", Yang interrogates Junior by grabbing his crotch and squeezing. His voice goes high-pitched until she lets go.
    • In "Breach", Coco boots a Beowolf in the crotch. It staggers and whimpers, right before she crushes its skull with her handbag.
  • In Bee and Puppycat, Bee accidentally hits her neighbor Deckard when her collapsible umbrella extends right into his crotch.
  • In the Dragonball Z Abridged adaptation of "Cooler's Return", the titular villain slammed his leg into Vegeta's crotch with a brief slow motion to make it clear what had happened. A cut later, Vegeta was on the ground asking why Cooler kept hitting him in the dick. Later still, Goku is surprised that of the five hundred Cooler clones Vegeta fought, every one of them punched him in the dick.
    • The first one was so devastating, Ave Maria was playing.
  • Enter The Dojo: A staple of the slapstick humor on the show:
    • The prime MO of Ameri-Do-Te and Rachel's specialty, as demonstrated in "Destroy the Groin".
    • A sparring match between Billy and a student from a rival dojo consists entirely of groin grabs in "Kung Foolishness".
    • "100 Ways to Attack the Groin" is by far the most watched video Enter the Dojo has yet produced.
  • During In The Little Wood and Strippin's golf challenge, the latter hits the former in the balls with a club, causing him to wince in somewhat comedic pain.
  • The Yogscast song "Carrot for a Cock" shows that the snowman with the titular vegetable appendage is apparently "terrified of rabbits". Can't imagine why.
  • In X-Ray and Vav, the titular heroes start their counterattack on the Corpirate with a literal Groin Attack: smashing their groins against his head.
  • In one of Thomas Sanders' Vines, he gets the "Left foot, red!" cue in Twister and applies that foot to a guy wearing red shorts.

Played for Drama

  • The second installation of Awkward. contains two in quick succession. First Alex against Lester in a staged fight to make Kevin look like a hero (which later leads to some unforgettable mental imagery when Lester remarks, "It's like a cat tried to suck my dick."), then Henry against Kevin. He takes a run at it.
  • Spc. Crota from Darwins Soldiers sneaks under a guard and shoots him in the groin.
  • In The Gamers Alliance, groin attack is Ax's preferred method of dealing with male enemies. Poor Refan gets to experience it first hand.
  • In Worm, Taylor needs to incapacitate Lung as quickly as possible, so she uses her bug control powers to make black widows bite his genitals. Fortunately for Lung, Good Thing You Can Heal is in full effect, at least, once the rotting is finished.