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Per wiki policy, Spoilers Off applies here and all spoilers are unmarked. You Have Been Warned.

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Tsukimino sure is lovely this time of year...

Everyone has dreams and ambitions, but that doesn't mean there can't be some humor along the way, right?


  • There's something oddly hilarious about Kiryu dragging Watase's limp body out of the arena after their bout in the Finale, just for Saejima and Katsuya to go at it.
  • Kiryu can put a decal of Haruka on his taxi. It leaves the impression that he has become a Doting Parent.
    • Alternatively, Kiryu's taxi can have an Itasha decal with an anime girl suspiciously looking like Hatsune Miku. Not only does Kiryu mention that his boss, Nakajima, would likely be unhappy about it, but you also get a trophy for buying it.
  • One of Kiryu's early substories is called "Cyberterrorism" in which the taxi stand gets hit with a computer virus flashing pop-ups over and over. Kiryu may be The Ace in a lot of things, but computer know-how is not his forte, especially since some choices involve smacking it. The real solution involves to first unplug the modem, but that makes some very...suggestive moans come from the speakers to "put it back in." They put it back in and Nakajima is ready to unplug the computer until Kiryu stops him. That's when Hirakawa comes in and fixes the problem and says the company needs to put in some antivirus software... and that this virus comes from porn sites. Cue Muramatsu and Nakajima playing dumb.
  • If you can get past it being That One Sidequest, where you lose if you fall once, Saejima's "Cold Ramen" side story. Saejima has to walk on ice to deliver a bowl of ramen to a customer, while several people have fallen and are helplessly sliding toward him. A lot of people failed it simply due to the hilarious and unexpected absurdity of it.
  • Saejima can learn the 'Essence of the Snow Man' Heat Action, where he throws a guy onto the floor, rolls him up in snow, to the point that he becomes a large snowball, and finally makes a snowman out of him. As the coup de grĂ¢ce, he puts a carrot onto the snow man in the most badass manner.
    • How he learns said Essence is pretty funny too.
  • The long battle right before Saejima and Baba kidnap Kitakata is a tense event, which gets even more tense when he has to disguise himself to hide from the cops. Here's where it gets funny: One of Saejima's disguise options is a Santa costume.
  • Daijiro Saigo, Akiyama's trainer/military fetishist is back, and suspiciously has hair this time. Saigo gets upset when Akiyama asks why he stopped shaving his head. If you manage to knock off his toupee while fighting him, he stops everything he's doing to go put it back on.
  • Shinada, so much. He serves as the game's Plucky Comic Relief, and he's such a strong contrast to the seriousness seen in Kiryu and Saejima. The conversation before his boss fight with Teppei Ono is definitely unlike anything said by the others before him.
    Ono: Moron! How about telling me where I can take out my anger?
    Shinada: Let me see. I know, how about the batting center? It's a pretty good way to blow off steam.
    Ono: You fucking with me?
    Shinada: I wouldn't want to.
  • "I got screwed by Vietnamese dong!" after Shinada realizes what currency he's being paid to play bodyguard for a music artist.
  • Haruka can become part of a Boke and Tsukkomi Routine with a comedian named Haruo, with Haruka as the Straight Man to Haruo's wise guy. Many Dope Slaps ensue.
  • Completing Haruka's mentor missions reveals a rather uncomfortable truth about her costume. It was made for Uda, who once dated Yoko. Not only was Haruka wearing a costume designed for a guy the entire time, but that means Uda used to be an idol as well! The two meet again and reconcile to Haruka's confusion.
    Haruka: ...I have no idea what's going on.
  • In the next-to-final chapter, like the others, Haruka can visit a certain master to raise her level cap, but unlike the others, she won't engage him in physical combat to do it. The solution? After Sosuke brings him up to speed on dance battles, old man Komaki decides to adjust his style so he can take Haruka on in one. Sosuke is clearly amused.
  • An unintentional example. In the final chapter, the protagonists learn of a hostage situation in the Millenium Tower. You'd expect them to show up and start kicking ass, right? Nope. They just stand timidly on the sidewalk and observe the police blockade. They look more like curious passersby than badasses on a rescue mission.
    • A car then nearly runs them over, and Yakuza with machine guns come out.They continue to do nothing. Only after the men raise their guns, Akiyama shouts for everyone to take cover.
  • In Premium Adventure, Kiryu and Haruka can take photos together and add captions to the good ones. A golden example.
    Haruka: Hi, I'm Haruka!
  • When the two visit the TV Tower in Keneicho, Haruka declines an offer to eat at a restaurant at the top of it, saying she needs more exercise anyway. Kiryu chuckles to himself, thinking that deep inside she's still a kid. Cue a frown on her face, as she knows exactly what he's thinking, although he quickly denies it.
  • Kiryu's reaction whenever Haruka mentions dating and boys, although longtime players will know exactly how he feels.
  • New to the karaoke scenes is the interjecter dancing when they're doing well. Kiryu moves his arms like he's directing traffic, Saejima is punching the air and looking like he's charging his HEAT, and Akiyama does a fantastic little disco shimmy.
  • Speaking of karaoke interjecters, several videos showcasing the game go out of their way to show Saejima cheering on during "Rouge of Love", filled with some of the most glorious, hammy broken English and hilarious movements. He even gets into it in All-Stars version of "So Much More!", a completely different song.
    Saejima: Evv'rybody say ROOUUGE. UV LOUUVE!
  • You can buy songs for Kiryu's racing sections. There's this Flavor Text for "Machine Gun Kiss."
    "A manly rock number. I love singing it at karaoke... Occasionally.
  • Some fans might be disappointed with Haruka's gameplay, since she dances as opposed to the fights expected of other protagonists. Granted, it wouldn't fix her image, but that hasn't stopped hackers from being creative. A simple switch of Kiryu's model with his adopted daughter can lead to this. Looks like Uncle Kaz has taught Haruka a thing or two.
  • One sidequest has Saejima trying to lure in a group of "Santa Hunters", leading to the sight of him dressed up as Santa Claus, complete with a beard. Of course, Saejima ends up getting pestered by a group of kids asking for presents. This then leads to a brief Chase Battle where he runs away from the kids with "Jingle Bells" playing in the background.
  • Two of Akiyama's substories has him participate in a Dance-Off, one with a street punk, and another with a Cool Old Lady. Akiyama's reactions to getting roped into dance battles are full of Akiyama's usual snark.
    Hide: A dance battle! If you win, you'll be known far and wide as "the man who beat Hide"!
    Akiyama: I think I can live without that title.
    Hide: But if you run, you'll forever be branded "the chicken who ran from Hide." You wanna live with that, yo?
    Akiyama: I keep telling you, I'm not a dancer.
    Hide: You sayin' you're cool with being a chicken?
    Akiyama: I didn't say that, yo.
  • The substory where Shinada gets invited into a Soapland for a very low price only to be paired with a woman that has Uno's face, prompting Shinada to ask for another woman. Then a woman with Fujita's face comes in, which Shinada turns down again. Then the manager comes in and refuses to let him have any more changes. You either have the option to run out of the place and get your money back or... comply and sleep with either one of the women. Cue a Fade to Black and you see Shinada in a defeated position with his head lowered. But hey at least you get a lot of EXP for your troubles.
  • Unlocking costume changing in Premium Adventure is pretty standard to the series, but every protagonist has at least one outfit that sticks out weirdly.
    • Kiryu has a costume where he wears a fundoshi, exposing his rear which the camera would most likely focus on due to being positioned behind him in 3rd person view.
    • Saejima has the Santa disguise that he wore to escape the police.
    • Haruka can cosplay as Hatsune Miku.
    • Akiyama can wear a white bodysuit with a One-Way Visor helmet.
    • Shinada has a costume where he's shirtless, wears a Tempura hat, and black leggings with Tempura coated boots and briefs.
  • Every once in a while, a random encounter will start with this bit of broken English instead of the usual cajoling:
    Mook: Hey, you. Wassup, man! Gib me maney prease.

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