Funny / Warhammer

  • From 7th Edition's Warriors of Chaos book: "Gharad the Ox duels the hated Elector Count Wulfgang von Greidhart at Maulwurfbad and takes his victim's skull as a drinking vessel. During the duel, Gharad is astounded to be cheered on by the women of the township. Obscurely pleased, he leaves the town intact."
  • From the Orcs and Goblins book: To put the matter beyond any shadow of a doubt - only Orcs on foot benefit from choppas - not Goblins, not mounted Orcs, not models on chariots, not small boys named Kevin, not Gerbils, not anything else, never, not ever, OK!
    • The eighth edition Orc book also has an Orc Warboss mourning the loss of his favorite snotling, who would fetch things for him... "o' course, it were never wot I asked for, but you could tell 'e was tryin'."
  • From the 8th Edition's Warriors of Chaos book, Wulfrik the Wanderer once again shows why he's one of the most badassed Chaos Champions to walk the earth
    "Face me if you dare, stunted whelp, or do you lack even an elven maid's courage? I thought the Sons of Grungni were great warriors, but perhaps you are no true Dwarf. Indeed, maybe you are instead some breed of bearded Goblin, though in truth I have seen a finer beard on a Troll's back-side."
    • This was said to a Dwarf KING who he then slaughtered in single-combat. But the best part is this — it was spoken in perfect Khazalid.
  • The Civil War rules in White Dwarf list random special rules for each army when fighting itself. All of them have some result based around the two factions having hated each other for centuries or millennia... except the Orcs, for whom this kind of legendary hatred typically dates back: one week.
  • Any time the Skaven do anything on the tabletop. This is an army that can screw itself three ways from Sunday with a bad roll on anything. They also have a giant Hamster wheel, that shoots lightning.
  • Necoho, god of atheists... I am not even making this up.
  • Several in-universe renowned quotes from Warhammer Fantasy are the Famous Last Words of overconfident heroes.
  • A certainly involuntary one: take the Wood Elves army book, and get to the part where they show you pictures of the models. There's one of two legendary twin elves, riding a Wood Dragon... And they're facing a lone Dwarf Trollslayer model. Whose face seems to indicate that he's about to crap his pants.