François-Marie Arouet
- On his death bed a priest came and asked him to denounce Satan; he merely replied, "Now is not the time to make new enemies."
Aurelio Voltaire Hernández
- The songs "Banned On Vulcan" and "When You're Dead."
- "The Dirtiest Song That Ain't" is probably the most fun you'll ever have shouting out bad words.
- His story on his Live! album about trying to explain Easter to his son, Mars.Mars: What's Easter?Voltaire: Mars, you know, how I told about Jesus and how he was executed? Well, Easter is three days later, when he rose from the grave.Mars: Jesus is a zombie?!?!
- "Coin Operated Goi" - a parody of "Coin Operated Boy". The song details a Jewish man's desire for a non-Jewish man. In theory, potentially a tragic story. In practice, Voltaire makes it hilarious.
- Really the variety of his albums can lead to some hilariously jarring dissonences. Try going from songs like "When you're evil" to some of his more recent works like "The Lambs became the wolves". The text most of the time remains grim but the variety of backing music just becomes funny over time.
