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Funny: Two Best Friends Play

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Machinima Series

    Season 1 Episodes 
Donkey Kong Country Returns
  • "AMERICA!"
  • Their near-simultaneous reaction to encountering the game's first Tiki Torch.
  • The ending where Matt is just too shocked to say anything while Pat angrily asks him what he just did.
  • Matt: Jump the shark! Jump the shark!
    Pat: NO, I DON'T WANT TO! (He glides over) Aaaaaw, I jumped it!

Vampire Rain
  • Upon playing the game, Pat comes to a realization:
    Pat: This game is stupid. And you're stupid for making me play it. And now I'm stupid.
    Matt: Well you didn't really need help with that in the first-
    Pat: Oh that's real-
  • The "flying garbage bag" that shows up out of nowhere, causing both Matt and Pat to yell out simultaneously "WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!"
  • Matt tries to offer moral support:
    Pat: No, I don't need moral support! I need to stop playing fuckin' Vampire Rain!
  • The video ends on this note:
    Matt: So would you want to chip in to help me buy the full version—?
    Pat: NOOOO

Dead Rising 2
  • Matt's priorities are not in proper order:
    Pat: Okay, dude, you can totally, like, wear outfits.
    Matt: Like... like a skater outfit.
    Pat: Yes, like a skater outfit.
    Cut to Chuck wearing cut offs, Groucho Marx glasses, and a stocking cap while riding a pink bicycle.
    Pat: What're you doing?
    Matt: It's... you said I could do anything.
    Pat: Yeah, but... Jesus Christ. This isn't gonna save Katie.
    Matt: Really, are you sure? I think this is saving Katie. Now, see, this is...
    Pat: What is wrong with you?!
  • Near the end where Matt has Chuck wearing a white sunddress and fighting off a tiger with a purse.
    Pat: Why do you keep wearing ladies' clothing? Why are you always wearing ladies' clothing?
  • Matt completely screws up the game by not giving Chuck's daughter her medication in time, causing her to turn into a zombie:
    Pat: Goooood job. You failed everything! You have literally failed everything. The whole game is over now. But it'll still let you play it to let you know how you fucked it up so bad.
    Pat: Y'know, this smooth jazz is really helping me to forget how you fucked up and killed that kid. Just like that other time.

Kane And Lynch: Dog Days
  • Matt deciding he wants to spin Lynch around in circles to create a dance party and Pat following him reluctantly.
    Pat: (cynically) This is the worst dance party ever...
  • Matt and Pat sitting in complete silence while Kane and Lynch run down an alley completely naked and covered in blood until Matt finally chimes in:
    Matt: Wait a minute... wait...hold on a second...
    Pat: Why, what's the problem?

Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood
  • Pat catching Matt up on the Assassins Creed story so far.
    Pat: You are in the Vatican in December 1499 after you beat the fuckin' Pope down with your fists.
    Matt: I beat the Pope??
  • Pat comes to the conclusion that Ubisoft games are all about murder, citing Imagine Babyz as an example.
  • Pat tricks Matt into climbing Castel Sant'angelo (the highest point in the game) and then letting go of his parachute at the worst possible time just for kicks.
    • * While Matt is reaching the top of Castel Sant'angelo, Pat makes this humorous comment.
    Pat: I didn't think you had it in you... What with you being an incompetent sack of shit."
    • This amusing exchange due to Matt's Buffy Speak in the last line.
    Pat: You are the worst sneaky ninja.
    Matt: No one knows I'm here, I am Mr. incognito.
    Pat: Ugh, you don't even know what incognito means!
    Matt: It means that no one can see me with our eyeballs.
  • Matt causes a giant mob fight in front of him, causing Pat to look on in disbelief.
  • "You are the fucking winter of my discontent, you son of a bitch."
  • Matt as Ezio is grabbing people:

Dead Space 2
  • Matt adding Space to everything possible like "Space AIDS", "Space America", "Space Zombies", "Space Wiki" and of course, "Space Rave".
  • The beginning where Matt talks about how unsettling the tone of the game was and Pat's response.
    Pat: (condescendingly) Do you need your blankie to play this game?
    Matt: (whining) I might NEED the blankie.
  • The ending where Matt was trying to deny needing a blankie and that he wasn't that scared, only for the both of them to freak out when a bug creature pops out at them.
  • Pat discusses Nicole:
    Pat: And even when she's dead, she won't shut the fuck up. Man, she looks awful.
  • "Oh, man! Isaac's the fucking boss! He didn't give a shit, he just headbutted the fuck out of that evil monster!"
  • Matt lamenting the deaths of his "best friends" (read: everyone he meets) for the entire video.
    Matt:...Can you help me, guys? I'm just..."[they are killed and dragged into the ceiling]" Oh, so you guys are just gonna get...
    Pat: Okay, A) they were shooting at you, B) they're now chunks.
  • Matt discovers stomping:
    Pat: Woah, why did you just kick his arm off?
    Matt: Do my feet have steroids?! How is that possible?
    Pat: Now his head fell off. [Matt continues to stomp the corpse] Stop that! That's fucked up!
  • Isaac punches off a dead guy's head.
    Pat: Why did he keep 600 dollars in his brain? Guess you could say he's got money on the mind...
  • The two of them discussing whether the game would be a good present for Pat's eight-year-old niece.
    Matt: Well, it'd teach her not to go to space.
  • Pat's reaction to Matt saying "America!" when looking at a dead Necromorph.
    Matt: Space America!

Disaster: Day of Crisis
  • Seeing the main character running against a raging firestorm while in a frog suit. Matt and Pat just let it go by without saying a single word.
  • Their reactions to the main character downing comically oversized food.
  • This exchange:
    Matt: (Pat has just rescued a young boy) You just saved that kid! Don't you feel good?
    Pat: NO!

Marvel VS Capcom 3
  • Their friend goes up against them with a joystick, only to be mocked relentlessly as he is plugging it in. Next cut, we see their friend completely owning the both of them each match.
  • Pat completely annihilating Matt with Dark Phoenix's combos.
    Matt: You put in cheat codes!
    Pat: Yeah, when you weren't looking and we were sitting here playing, I put in the cheat code that makes me better than you.
  • It's subtle, but after losing a few rounds you can see Pat copy Woolie's team to try and even the odds. It doesn't help.

Fist of the North Star: Ken's Rage

XBox Indie Games
  • Alpha Chimp and Pat's utter disdain for the game and it's myriad issues - including a grotesque-looking lead, a skybox with visible edges, and the fact that a player can climb up into the sky. Capped of with a heavily cynical "Oh no, I can't play Alpha Chimp anymore," from Pat when the trial time for the game runs out.
  • Baby Maker Extreme. All of it.
  • "What the hell, are we playing a Quicktime Event?!"
  • "That Game Over Screen was so medieval that it says 'Game Ober'!"
  • "It's like we're in Bizarro 1997 playing an unreleased underground Dreamcast game that no one talks about!"
  • Fucking. Alderman.

Red Dead Redemption
  • Old Betsy, Whore of Steel.
    Pat: WHY WON'T YOU DIE?!
  • For those who stuck around near the end finding out that it was actually GUN, a game with a similar Old West setting.
  • Matt attempting to knife a bear to death. And succeeding.
    Pat: Holy shit. You are knifing that bear the fuck up. Cut him! Cut his face, man!

Deadly Premonition
  • Matt's ringtone being the background music in the hotel.
  • Matt forgetting to remind Pat that he had to save, so when Pat dies in-game, it starts all over from the beginning.

    Season 2 Episodes 
Resident Evil 4
  • Two separate occasions of Matt and Pat completely not paying attention to the screen and missing quick time events.
  • Matt accidentally killing The Merchant:
    Pat: He was your only friend in this horrible wasteland, and you murdered him.
    Matt: It was an accident!
    • And then the guy respawns, prompting:
    Matt: Wait, what—
    Pat: What the shit?!
    Matt: I killed him!
  • Pat tricks Matt into getting eaten by a giant monster fish for giggles.
  • "The World's Littlest Hobo!"
  • Pat coaxing Matt into shooting Ashley while she's in her knight armor.
  • When Pat is in disbelief that Matt throwing flash grenades at enemies on a bridge (way too high for the trajectory) actually works. (It stuns them and they fall over backwards off the bridge.)
  • Matt when shooting the first crow:
    Matt: That bird had a grenade in it's head! I got it before it got me.

Mortal Kombat 9
  • Pat's love of invisibility:
    Pat as Smoke: Yeah, invisible!
    Matt as Kung Lao: Why do you keep taking invisible dudes?!
    Pat: Because invisibleness is awesome!
    A few seconds later
    Pat: Totally!
    Matt: Aw shit!
    Pat while smashing Kung Lao's face: Invisible x-rays!
    Matt laughs
    Pat: You can't even see it, it's like magic surgery!
    After Matt knocks Scorpion into The Pit
    Pat: I bet ya Reptile is hanging out down there. You can't see him though. You know why?
    Matt: [sarcastically] Oh why? Why?
  • Matt's Christopher Walken impression from the Mortal Kombat 9 video. Even Pat cracked up at that one.
    Matt as Smoke/Ninja!Christoper Walken: NO ONE... CAN SEE ME MOVE... (beat) IN THE DARKNESS!
  • Matt's reaction to Shao Kahn in the intro to Story Mode:
    Matt: Oh, he's got Rage from Mortal Kombat vs. DC.
    Pat groans
  • All of the allusions to the first movie and the cartoon. All of them.
  • The duo's reaction to the Krypt Monster towards the end of the video.
  • The Sheeva vs Sheeva fight, in which Matt and Pat spam Sheeva's "flies up in the arm, drops on you and stomps on you a little" attack.
  • The dialogue that follows the Cage vs Kano fight.
    Pat: Where the fuck did he go? Did he just jump off the side? 'See you later, fuckers!'
    Matt: Oh wait, there's spikes.
    Pat: Yeah, 'cause the eighty-foot drop to the floor would've been fine if there were no spikes.
    Matt: He can fly through the air in ball form!
    Pat: Are you just saying he's just flying around the island in a ball?
    Matt: He's Australian Samus! He's Screw Attacking all the way back to his house.

Portal 2
  • When smooth jazz is deployed:
    Matt: Smooth jazz?
    Pat: You ready for some smooth jazz?
    Smooth jazz starts playing
    Matt: Awwww shit.
    Pat: It's so smooth I can't take it!
    Matt: Aw man, I'm slipping all over the place.
    Pat: I'm just sliding out of this chair!
    Matt: Aw yeah-music stop-wah.
    Pat: Now that's depressing.
  • Near the end where Matt and Pat both find themselves stuck in an infinite loop of portals:
    Matt: This is like an abstract painting of our stupidity.
    Pat: Mostly yours, though...mostly your stupidity.
  • Wheatley's first conversation with Chell, prompting Pat to make a snarky response:
    Wheatley: —it's not out of the question that you might have a very minor case of serious brain damage.
    Pat: (to Matt) That's amazing, the game knows you have fucking brain damage.
  • Yet another one of Pat's insults towards Matt:
    Pat: You're like the Ralph Wiggum of real life. Turn around for two seconds and I catch you eating glue and crayons.
    Matt: Okay, this is getting a little too personal.
  • Matt calling Wheatley "Nigel," full stop. Particularly funny here:
    GLaDOS crushes Wheatley
    Matt: You said nothing bad would happen!!
    Pat: To you!
  • Matt genuinely does not understand the concept of portals.
    Matt: Wait, are there three of them or four?
    Pat: (disbelievingly) There's two.
    Matt: What? No, look! One, two, three!
    Pat: You're looking through the portal at the other portal.
    Matt: Wait, hold on...
    Matt: I don't get it.
  • Just this:
    Pat: That's a Material Emancipation Grid.
    Matt: Wait, what? I don't listen to rap, dude.
  • Matt makes progress on a puzzle:
    Pat: Holy shit, good job. I think I have some dog treats here I can give you.
  • During co-op, Matt keeps stepping on and off a door-opening button for the lulz.
    Pat: I swear to God, if I fucking walk over there and that shit closes on me, I'm gonna go outside, find a homeless man, and pay him money to come here and take a dump in your sink.
    (door closes)
    Pat: WHAT THE FUCK?!
  • Matt's co-op song:
    Matt: Workin' together...
    Pat: Don't sing a song.
    Matt: Solvin' the problem...
    Pat: Don't sing a song! No one likes music!
    Matt: It's gonna be fun when we solve science!
    Pat: I'm gonna kill you.
  • When Matt is having... trouble directing his lasers.
    Pat: Just shoot the laser at the thing. It's like child's play with portals. And lasers. Deadly lasers.
    Matt: Whi... Which one?
    Pat: Ohhh my god. Up. Look up.
    Matt looks at the floor.

Super Nintendo
  • "You're a Timecop...but you're in space".
  • "Bruce Lee always sounded like a cat in heat."
  • "I love how Steven Seagal's walk speed is about as fast as he can go in real life."
    • "What the hell? Do those boxes EVEN EXIST?"
  • After sitting through all these crappy games, Pat picks a game for Matt to play:
    Matt: All right, I'll give it a shot. [Shaq Fu's title screen appears] NOOOOOOOOOOO- [cue credits]
  • *LJN logo appears on the screen* Oh fuck.

LA Noire
  • Pat's interperating Officer Phelps dialogue as a crazy yelling person when he is interrogating a lady:
    Pat as Phelps: I'mofficerPhelpswhat'dyousee?! Did you kill him, I found this gun! Look at this gun is it yours?!
    Pat as the lady but doing it with a really deep voice: WHY YOU WANNA KILL ME.
  • Their 40's accents.
    Section Title: Buyer Beware
    Pat: Buyer Beware! Myah! It's a scoop!
    • "Hey, buddy, get inside the paddywagon, I'm sure you'll make some new friends in there! Don't drop the soap, fucker!"
  • As their character stands over a dead body at a crime scene:
    Matt: What's the prognosis, Pat?
  • The two of them being so busy arguing while driving that Pat runs into a truck.
    Matt: Man, pay attention to the road!
    Pat: It would be a lot easier if I didn't have to look over at you and tell you you were stupid.
  • After a man offers to get his boss for the cops.
    Matt: Yeah, you better, get your fucking boss out here so we can fucking chase him the fuck—
    The man bolts out the back door
    Pat: Oh, that motherfucker! I'm going to fucking beat the shit out of him!
  • When a witness told them that when the victim was shot it looked painful
    Pat: Yeah, getting shot fucking hurts! PRO TIP! Pro tip, Matt!
    Matt: This is just expert testimony right here.
    Pat: Oh, man, I hope I never get shot, because I heard, this lady tells me, that it LOOKS like it hurts!
  • Phelps reaches into a garbage pail by the crime scene:
    Pat: Stow it, don't throw it! Oh, shit, a gun.
  • "Man, I love commendations for yelling at women!"
  • Matt and Pat arguing about the bottle:
    Matt: Get it, it's that bottle.
    Pat: This bottle was not the murder weapon.
    Matt: It's the murder weapon.
    Pat: This bottle was not the murder weapon.
    Matt: Yeah it was. They said he got shot by a bottle, right...?
    *cut to a Law & Order style card* MATT'S APARTMENT, TUESDAY, MAY 17TH, 7;47 PM, STILL ARGUING
    Matt: (after arguing for a bit) Oh, man it looks like something went down.
    Pat: It almost looks like he was SHOT by a...
    Matt: ...By the bottle.
    *Upon finding the gun*
    Matt: You found the bottle! Oh shit...
    Pat: That is the most...That would be really awkward to drink out of I think...
    Pat:You know... Every time you go to drink, you're like 'Oh no, THERE ARE BULLETS IN THIS FUCKING GUN!'
  • "In the 1940's, if a cop didn't like what a woman was wearing, JAIL."
  • They beat down a suspect, then complain about Ralph (Their partner) getting knocked out so easily.
    Matt: Shit! You just go to this guy's house and beat the living crap out of him.
    Pat: Fuck the police.
    Matt: Hey Ralph, thanks for backing me up there. When that- when that suspect started yelling and swinging his arm it caught me off guard.
    Pat: But it's cool, Ralph has the good idea of pointing a gun at a man handcuffed on the fucking floor.

Heavy Rain
  • "There ain't no monsters in Heavy Rain! The only monster is man!"
  • "Oh, man, that's right, I got married...oh fuck."
    • "Once you're married, all your choices are gone."
  • The prolonged agony of them trying to get Ethan to shave and failing the controller prompts repeatedly.
    Pat: Shave your filthy hobo beard! Oh, you ruined it!
  • Pat in particular overreacts to every tiny thing in Heavy Rain. And it's hilarious.
    • Such as orange juice:
    Pat: Shake that shit! It's so pulpy! I can't handle all this pulp!!
    • And helping Ethan's wife:
    Pat: Don't help her! DO NOT HELP HER! If you help her now, you'll have to help her every day!
    (Matt misses the controller prompt)
    Pat: Noooo!
    Matt: Oh, I failed at helping my wife!
    • And playing with Ethan's kids
  • There's a long period of Ethan living his shitty life when the friends are silent; you'd almost think they're moved by the story until:
    Matt: Man, what a loser.
  • This exchange near the aforementioned "what a loser"
    Matt: (Jason has wandered away and the two have found him on the other side of the street) Why the fuck did you wander out of the mall?
    Pat: And onto a busy street!
    Pat: (Jason is about to get run over, Ethan pulls a Diving Save) No! No, Jason!
    Matt: (starts cracking up, very loudly)
  • Their exchange upon seeing the kids sword fighting
    Matt: Oh great, I got a bunch of larpers for kids?
    Pat: You know what you need to do? You need to go out there and give those kids a whuppin'.

Duke Nukem Forever
  • Their constant allusions to the game's decade-long development time:
    Pat: It came out!
    Matt: No.
    Pat: It came out!
    Matt: Okay, you encoded something on a disc, and you put it in here to troll me.
    Pat: "Downloadable content"? They still didn't finish the whole game!
    Pat: Where's the guns at?
    Matt: I guess they need a couple more years to get those done.
  • The intro to the title screen, where they first are speaking fragments of words, which then devolves into wordless, excited screaming. Followed by them getting to the title screen:
    Pat: (calmly, as if they hadn't been screaming in the first place) Oh hey, it's Duke Nukem Forever.
    • And when the game proper starts:
      Pat:...this looks fucking terrible!
  • Duke's punching out some aliens:
    Pat: Aw, Batman ain't got shit!
  • One of the command prompts is to spin a chair.
    Pat: WHY?!
  • Pat's high-pitched lamenting of why they made the game like this after he kills a pair of aliens that randomly dropped down from a vent.
  • Their frustration at not being able to find a gun and then their excitement upon finding quickly returns back to frustration.
    Pat: Awwwwwww shit, a gun! THIS GUN IS TERRIBLE.

Shadows of the Damned

  • Both of them attempting to pronounce the title with little success.
    Pat: Stop that, just stop trying.
  • Pat explaining the entire convoluted plot of the F.E.A.R. games for the entire video, only for Matt to tell him at the end that he wasn't even paying attention.
  • Matt repeatedly depleting his ammo to shoot the heads off of dead guys.

Man vs Wild: The Game
  • Matt as Bear Grylls being attacked by a crocodile and bees at the same time.
  • Pat doing a Lampshade Hanging of Matt's love of So Bad, It's Good Games.
    Pat: How do you find piece of shit games that no one even knows exist and then "OH MAN, LET'S PLAY! IT'S JUST SO GREAT!"?!
  • Matt being unable to keep from laughing after seeing AI!Bear Grylls jumping and then doing an off key rendition of the Item Get song from Metroid after seeing the Screw Attack-esque jump between ledges.
    • On that note, taking the idea and running with it later.
    "Remember that time the Chozo gave the Arbiter the Power Beam, and he was like, 'Destroy the Locust, asshole'"?
  • AI!Bear Grylls running away from bees — that is all.
  • The snakes in the game all going for the same area.
    Matt: All right! My testicles are filled to the brim with poison but I gotta make it up this mountain!
  • At one point, the game tasks AI!Bear Gryllis with building a shelter in the middle of a forest. Cue the stream of Game of Thrones references.
    Pat: Those fucking Lannisters! If only I had a smooth talking midget to help me build this shelter!
    Matt: If only you had some direwolves to keep you safe at night!
    Pat: I'm going to sleep and all that dick poison is going to be gone!
    [Bear Grylls falls asleep in the shelter only to be awakened by a bear]
    Matt: DIREBEAR!
  • Every five seconds, Matt mentions something about how drinking one's own piss would solve everything in the game.
    AI!Bear Grylls: [Next to a river] None of it is drinkable. Too many parasites, rubbish and debris.
    Matt: You know DOESN'T have parasites and debris? My piss. [beat] Or does it? ONLY ONE WAY TO FIND OUT!
  • Matt saying "America." through barely-restrained laughter as he basically makes Bear Grylls skip around.
  • AI!Bear Grylls vs. a beaver.
  • The various Bear Grylls "facts" that pop up.
    Stuck halfway up Mt. Everest and running low on oxygen and viable choices, Bear Grylls piloted an F-16 fighter jet to reach the summit in record time.
    Bear Grylls once nursed several injured mountain lions back to health, until they were strong enough for him to kill and devour.
    In 1995, Bear Grylls fell into a deep desert chasm, whereupon he encountered Cthulhu, the old one. At the mere sight of him, Cthulhu immediately started to run.

    Season 3 Episodes 
Amnesia: The Dark Descent
  • After ten minutes of buildup, Matt finally meets his first monster. It's worth the wait.
    Pat: Are you crying?
  • After Matt ragequits to the desktop:
    Matt: I'm exiting. Goodbye!
    Pat: Hey! Hey, whoa whoa whoa whoa...
    Matt: Bye, Amnesia! It's done.
    Pat: Hey-
    Matt: ...wait. P-ponies? Why... Pat? Pat, why is there ponies on your desktop?

Captain America: Super Soldier
  • Matt constantly avoiding saying the word "America" despite Pat's prodding.
  • Cap's silly backflips:
    Pat: ...this is what the Super Soldier Serum was for?
    Matt: 500 billion dollars spent on backflips!
  • Miscellaneous insults from Pat about Matt's poor attention span.
    Matt: (throwing his shield at two random steel drums) Yeah!
    Pat: Man, what the fuck is wrong with you? Did you eat, like, a ton of paint as a child?
    Matt: You mean... you mean "wall candy"?
    Pat: Yeah, I mean fuckin' wall candy, what the hell?
  • Upon finding a puzzle
    Pat: Diiiiiiiiiicks.
  • Matt asking Pat how would he would feel if he were frozen and awoken 70 years in the future with all his loved ones dead:
    Pat: 70 years in the future, right?
    Matt: Yes.
    Pat: Are you dead?
    Matt: I would...
  • "I'll unleash my POWERS! AMERICAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!" Doubles as a Moment Of Awesome.
  • This gem has Matt monologuing as Captain America:
    Matt: Dear Peg, today I saw a man spread-eagle so HARD, he looked like a wishbone. I never went back to war that day...
  • The two get a good look at Cap's face.
    Matt: Look into the eyes of a true patriot.
    Pat: That's the face of a goddamned hero.

Deus Ex: Human Revolution
  • "This isn't Deus Ex! THIS IS ROBOCOP!"
  • Pat: Quick, you have to stop the terrorists.
    Matt: These terrorists? [shoots SWAT officers who promptly retaliate] SHIT!
  • Dancing Jensen.
  • The obligatory "Jensen beating up and stabbing civilians" montage.
  • The ending, where Matt makes Jensen tell Cassandra Reed that her daughter died horribly and painfully followed by a punch to the face.
    Pat: WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT? [cue credits]

Street Fighter III: Third Strike Online Edition
  • Matt and Pat stopping during gameplay as Pat tries to explain that Makoto is not a man. Matt, playing Hugo, proceeds to use Gigas Breaker on Pat while he's explaining, KO'ing him. Pat's reaction is even funnier.
    Pat: (Pat has been explaining why Makoto is a girl, Matt suddenly uses Gigas Breaker) What're you fucking doing?! You piece of shit! Fuck you!
    Matt: I laid down on her! I just made her into a woman!
    Pat: UGH. That is creepy.
  • Immediately afterwards, when Poison walks on-screen during Hugo's win animation.
    Matt: Hey, look, that hot babe's next to me!
    Pat: Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME?!
  • After fighting several games against Ken players online:
    Pat: What is with the Ken brigade?
    Matt: What do you mean, "what is with it?" It has ALWAYS BEEN THERE!

Earth Defense Force: Insect Armageddon

  • When Vincent goes into the Nightmare Stage after meeting Catherine.
    Vincent: What the hell? I was at the bar, and this girl came in, and...
    Pat: She gave you a roofie! You're (simultaneously with Matt) being raped right now!
  • As the game explains the text messaging system.
    Matt: From your phone, you can destroy tiny sheep demons that are invading your network.
  • When Katherine says she has something important to say
    Pat: NOPE!
    Simultaneously: FUCK YOU BITCH!
    *They exit the game*
  • "You taste like cancer, I'm so wet!"

Gears of War 3
  • "Tip: Radishes are rich in potassium."
  • "That beard is the one who shot his wife!"
  • Matt's continued confusion about whom the MC is looking for, which he changes from his wife to his dad's wife to some random relative.
  • "Tip: When Marcus holds his ear and starts talking, you might as well put the controller down."
  • Matt and Pat arguing about how Matt died during the co-op play:
    Matt: No, I was strategically trying to scare them!
    Pat: With what?
    Matt: With my bravado!
  • Matt completely averting the typical phrase related to helicopters in action sequences:
    Matt: I think you're going to have to get inside that chopper with great urgency.
    • And then completely neglecting it seconds later when a giant tentacle destroys the helicopter and Matt groans, "NOO, THE CHOPPAAAAH!"
  • "Tip: Dom's wife wasn't very attractive anyway."
  • Their continued fanboying over Cole Train, complete with a shout out to "Terry Tate: Office Linebacker."
    Pat: I love you, Cole Train!
    Matt: homo.
  • Matt's controller continually failing at the most inopportune times.

Max Payne 2 (mini-episode):
Pat: Max Payne talks like that. It's kinda weird.
Matt: Why would they hire a policeman who just never stops like, y'know, monologuing to himself?
Pat: It's probably really good for reports.
  • "It's Max Payne 2: Electric Bugaloo."
  • Their discussion of his name is pretty epic:
    Pat: He's got the best name.
    Matt: It's like, "Hey honey, we just had this beautiful baby boy, what should we call him—"
    Matt: MAX PAYNE, BITCH! 'Cause it was fuckin' painful to deliver him! He was monologuing as soon as he came out my vag! (as Max) The umbilical cord stretched around my neck like a noose. Pain was behind me in a gaping hole!
  • After blowing up a barrel and Max has no reaction at all:
    Matt: (through laughter) Not a single fuck was given.
  • "Oh, Max! You so crazy!"
  • Matt committing suicide accidentally by trying to dive backwards off of a van while at extremely low health. The last line seals it:
    Matt: (watching as Max lays dead on the ground and the camera pans around his corpse) Oh, Max Paaaaayne! Beat You can't dull the pain NOW! (cue end credits)

Rise of Nightmares

Dark Souls
  • Pat's character climbing a long ladder to the tune of "Snake Eater".
  • At the start, when Pat says that in an interview where he was asked if it would be easier than Demon's Souls, one of Dark Souls developers replied that it would be even harder. Cue Matt screaming.
  • Any time that they manage to get themselves into a bad situation. Considering the game that they're playing... there are a LOT.
    • Especially everything involving "Sauron".
  • "Man, that guy's a fuckin' Badass. Holy shit."

Dead Rising 2: Off the Record
  • When discussing who puts the zombies in the wrestling leotards:
    Pat: Yo Jimmy, you gotta put the zombie junk in the leotard today!
    Matt: No, man, I did it last week!
    Pat: No man, no man Sally's sick, you gotta take it.
    Matt: I hate working on this show!
    Pat: We can't just put the zombies out there naked, that'd be creepy.
    Matt: That'd be creepy and weird, so kindly push the balls so that they fit in the leotard.
  • Frank running towards the screen in some sweet cutoffs while "One Winged Angel" plays in the background.

Batman: Arkham City
  • Bruce Wayne: Listen to me carefully. When they open the door, do not panic. Stay close to me.
  • Matt as Batman: Alfred, can you send me a young female? I need some companionship for tonight's ball, thanks!
    Pat: Alfred just ain't gonna send one of those over on some kind of rocket ship.
    [Later, when the Batman suit arrives via rocket]
    Matt: Whoa, what do you think's in there?
    Pat: I'm hoping it's cool Batman stuff.
    Matt: It's probably that girl that I ordered.
    Pat: No! They don't have mail order rocket hookers!
  • Matt has a great nonsensical comment: "Scanning this indicates to me that Val Kilmer is fat."
  • All of the Insane Troll Logic comments they come up with while Penguin repeatedly punches Bruce Wayne in the head. Special mention goes to: "GEORGE CLOONEY WAS THE BEST BATMAN!"
  • When they find a random guy with a messed up face clutching a cooler:
    Pat: What the...?
    Matt: What's up with this dude? This is some freaked up bullshit, man. (Batman stares around and Matt starts giggling) Batman's not even looking!
    Pat: I can't...he can't even deal.
    • This gem too.
    In-game Doctor: How crazy do you have to be to cut your own face off?
    Both Matt and Pat: PRETTY FUCKING CRAZY!
    • Which of course causes Matt to start quoting Se7en ala "What's in the case, man?! WHAT'S IN THE CAAAASE?!"
  • While demonstrating some of Batman's fighting moves for no real reason:
    Matt: (as a random guard) Yo, man! Where'd you learn those sick moves?!
    Pat: CHINA.
    Matt: (as Batman) Qui Gon Gin taught me!
    Pat: (as Batman) And now he's dead! You connect the dots, George Lucas!
  • Both of them attempting the Christian Bale Batman voice and failing miserably to the point where they break into coughing fits and Pat exclaims: "Man, fuck his method acting bullshit!"

Persona 4
  • Matt saving over Pat's maxed-out save file.
    Pat: What the fuck are you doing?! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOI-*cut to credits*
  • They discuss the versatility of the phrase "SEE YOU LATER, FUCKER!"
  • "Man, whenever my sister was mad at my dad, she slapped him right in his asshole!"
  • ">You find yourself alone with Nanako..."
    Pat: YEAAAAAAH! Time at last!
    Matt: (nerdy voice) HEY, DO YOU COLLECT YUGIOH CARDS!?
  • —> Matt: I will probably have to say 'elipses' to this strange-
    Kenpachi Ramasama: ......!?
    Matt & Pat: YEAAAAAAH!!!!
  • A group of students are chatting in the classroom.
    Matt: So luckily I got the plastic tape back on her mouth, and then she didn't tell anyone!
  • "There has been an incident inside the school district. Police officers have been dispatched around the School Zone."

Cabela's Survival: Shadows of Katmai
  • Pat's reaction to the title screen:
    Matt: [Oblivious] Alright so this is Cabela’s...
    Pat: [sobbing] Noooohohohooo!
    Matt: It's so good.
    Pat: Why?
    Matt: Get hyped.
    Pat: NO!
  • Matt and Pat wondering how the husky, Togo, managed to always end up at their destination ahead of them, even if they had to climb up a sheer cliff in order to reach the area. This includes one instance where the camera suddenly turns to a downward view of the bottom of the valley, where a little black speck (representing Togo, who was previously up on top of the cliff) is visible. They then cut back and circle Togo in red with the words FUCKING TOGO over it.
    Pat: Togo's like made out of Spider-Man!
  • Matt and Pat's response to the doctor falling to her death.
    Matt: I took that doctor, and threw her on the ground!
    Pat: I don't need your medicine!
    Simultaneously: I'M AN ADULT!
  • Halfway through a boss fight with a bear, the bear knocks over a full-sized tree and starts swinging it like a club from its mouth. Both quite understandably flip out.
  • The ending, where they start complaining about the dull climbing sections and how the game is losing steam. Gilligan Cut to them being chased through what looks like an abandoned lumberyard by a huge bear, flipping out as it completely wrecks the place Michael Bay style while chasing after them.
  • After escaping the epic bear boss battle mentioned, Matt has this to say:
    "I barely got away from that encounter. (Beat) ...Nailed it!
  • The guys' reaction to the lead character's oddly sexual enjoyment of the fire he makes:
    Pat: (as the character) Aw yeah, I should just shove my dick right in this campfire.
    Mat: (as the character) Aw, this fire feels so good around my dick, girl.
  • The lead character has to cut open a dead moose and shove the girl inside it and Matt randomly advises: "SEW HER IN!"
  • After a vicious attack from a pack of wolves:
    Matt: JESUS! I'm getting raped to sleep by the dickwolves over here!
  • Upon finding yet another glitch in the game:
    Pat: Dude, DUDE. HOLY SHIT! Dude, I'm making the trees melt with my body! That Axe body spray is having unintended side effects!
    Pat: FUCK YO' TREES!
    Matt: FUCK YO' TREES!
  • After an old man, who looks like a hobo, stands over their character, who is clearly moving around, and asks him if he's alive.
    Matt: Zombie!Josh Brolin.
    Pat: Gonna bite your face, old man!
    Matt: I'm gonna get ya! Ho-ho-ho!
  • Their reaction to Karen surviving her 30+ story fall back at the beginning.
    Pat: (Completely deadpan) Get the fuck out.
    Matt: (Imitating Togo as Scooby Doo) Let's get the fuck out.

    Season 4 Episodes 
  • Pat names his Argonian character Reptile. And of course, makes sure to become invisible.
    • Which totally doesn't work and Pat gets his assed kicked.
  • Matt starts off the video trying to play Drake Of The 99 Dragons. He rage quits rather quickly.
    Matt: Alright, fuck it. Just run the Skyrim video.
  • Pat shooting a bunch of people in the face with arrows, and them underreacting to it.
  • Pat discovering his character has a hit put out on him by someone named "Dorthe", finding a child with the same name and (unsucessfully) attempting to take revenge.
    Pat: That kid tried to kill me! And her ghost dog tried to finish the job! That ghost dog will serve ME now!
  • "OW! I took an arrow to the-*abrupt cut*
  • Talking to the long-haired blonde guy at the beginning:
    Ralof: You were trying to cross the border, right?
    Matt: I sure was, Skwisgaar.
  • Pat's repeated failed attempts to get his follower to stop triggering a trap.
  • Pat shooting M'aiq with the bow & arrow with the arrow landing dead center in his mouth.
  • Their silent reactions to the Khajit in the loading screen.
  • The animated opening where it shows Matt happily riding a dragon and Pat's facial reaction to it.
  • Upon seeing a huge man attempt to beat up a much smaller man:
    Matt: Just another day in Skyrim.
  • Their debacles attempting to find and fight a dragon.
    Pat: Everyone's like "There are fucking dragons out there! Did you hear there are dragons?"

    Matt: (After seeing a Dark Elf teleport to a few feet away) Dark Elfs are magical.
  • "Sneaking with my tiny little lizard feet..."

Assasin's Creed: Revelations
  • The animated intro, featuring Matt and Pat as assassins. Matt attempts Le Parkour, falls and lands in a heap not moving,Pat surveys the scene for a moment... and then points and laughs.
  • During the intro:
    Pat: "Hey, remember that time those security guards showed up to apprehend you with sticks?"
    Matt: "And then you totally killed all of them."
    Pat: "Yeah, because they showed up with fucking STICKS."
  • The CLOOK.
  • "Once you go Black Animus you can't go back...imus?"
  • "Yo, dude! Come on, training, 6 o'clock, chop chop!"
  • Pat challenges Matt to pronounce the name of the anyone on his team. He can't.
  • Their lampshading of Sofia's Absolute Cleavage:
    [Ezio and Sofia are looking at a map]
    Pat: Nope. "Uh yeah...this is where I used to...TITS! [beat] I mean ITALY! [beat] There are girls with tits there!"
  • When Ezio confronts Duccio:
    Pat: *in an Italian accent* Who is this, your DAD?!
    Matt: Oh my God! He seems to have Final Fantasy levels of straps and belts on him!
    • After Duccio runs away, Ezio proceeds to hit on Sophia the exact same way.
  • The entire "money throwing sequence". Matt and Pat make fun of how many people gather to collect the money Ezio throws on the ground, and get way too into it:
    Pat: Could you imagine how pathetic it would be if you just dropped ten dollars in coins on the fucking street, and people just started to "Oh my God"?
    Matt: People just stomping on their own children to get to that chedda.
    Pat: Oh man, these ten dollars in quarters are going to make a fucking riot break out. Jesus fuck.
    Matt: People are shit! People equal shit!
    Pat: How do you get up in the morning?!
    (Ezio climbs up on a well)
    Matt: Look, I'll be even more, more, from the tops of the towers!
    Pat: Come to your master! You'll make what I give you!
    Matt: Pray for death!
    (Ezio starts throwing dirt, people start walking away)
    Matt: Ah, take this dirt!
    Pat: That's what you are!
    (Ezio throws money again and everyone comes back)
    Matt: You come back for more!
    Pat: You come back so easily!
    Matt: You sack of wine!
    Pat: You are like, more prostitutes than Cobra Commander!
    Matt: Oh, cleave the meat off each other's bones for this blood money!
    Pat: Take this money that I am pissing down upon you with my Ancient God Dick!
  • "You can't just be draggin' around dead bodies in front of the po-lice! I mean, it's funny at first... (Beat, the screen says "MafiaOfBananas is Online")...but then the Mafia of Bananas shows up! And you're all like, 'I don't even have any fuckin' bananas! I don't owe you protection!'"
  • When they are at a pier, hanging from a ledge. We get this glorious combination of Artificial Stupidity and Good Bad Bugs
    Pat: You're being detected,you're being fucking tide- *guard knocks Ezio in the water to get on the ledge* Oh my God.
    Matt: *Points and laughs*
    Pat: Man that guy is- *guard jumps into the water
    Matt: Hey, he died!
    Pat: *laughs* This is how you guard a boat, let's throw rocks at that dude!
    Matt: I am Ezio, the master assassino!
    • "You try and impress a girl, and what ends up happening? You're swimming laps while getting pelted by rocks."
    *later when Ezio gets back on the pier*
    Matt: Oh shit! *Ezio jumps at a guard and glitches through him*
    Both: WHAT?!
    Pat: Ezio is a crazy teleporting ghost!
  • They have some fun with some gypseys.
    Matt: Ooh, soup!
    Pat: That looks like some nasty-ass soup.
    (Matt turns on Eagle Vision, the soup is nothing but blackness)
    Pat: Eagle Vision sees nothing. It is a impenetrable blackness from which there is no escape
    (They return later with a dead body)
    Pat: Hey, I got a present for you fuckers.
    (They toss the body down to the gathering)
    Pat: They don't even give a fuck!

Metal Gear Solid HD
  • Matt and Pat's multiple codec calls. Specifically, the one about being fucking INVISIBLE!
  • The Sorrow appears behind The Boss with glowing red eyes, prompting:
    Matt: *uncontrollable laughter*
  • Matt runs around wearing the crocodile cap and is firing his gun wildly. "WHAT AM I FIGHTING FOR!?!?!?!?"
  • This discussion about Matt's decision to paint Snake's face with the stars and stripes:
    Matt: Oh it's so cool!
    Pat: That's not really stealthy, man. That's not very sneaky. Aren't you supposed to be here secretly? Like if they catch you, you're supposed to be like "I don't know what country I'm from".
    Matt: Well then they know who brought down the thunder then!
  • Upon finding the American facepaint:
    Matt: *girlish gasp* (high pitched voice) I love this game!
  • Matt falling off the ladder in MGS3. You know, the ladder.
  • Matt and Pat's reaction to zooming in on Paz in Peace Walker:
  • Matt teabagging the unconscious soldiers:
    Pat: What are you doing?
    Matt: I'm imprinting my beliefs on them.
    Pat: Your beliefs are your testicles?
  • After killing Ocelot after he's knocked out:
    Pat: You created a Time Paradox!
    Matt: I heard about those... I'M MARTY MCFLY AND THE TERMINATOR ALL IN ONE!
  • Discussing Volgin's Depraved Bisexual tendencies:
    Pat: (perverted chuckling) [Volgin's] gonna come a lot in this game...
    Matt: With Ocelot, with Raiden, with EVA, with other unnamed soldiers... with Johnny Sasaki...
    Pat: That's why Johnny poops so much...
    Matt: *uncontrollable laughter*

Saints Row the Third
  • Any time Esmeralda speaks.
  • Their customization of Esmeralda.
  • Upon encountering a glitch in which a motorcycle lying on the ground has pulsating wheels:
  • Esmeralda going on a rampage, while completely naked, using a giant purple penis as a weapon. That makes people explode.
    Matt: All right. All right, motherfuckers.

Beatdown: Fists of Vengeance

Soul Calibur V

Spider-Man Games
  • Any time Matt talks about a completely absurd plot... that actually happened in real Spider-Man comic books. Two of which are Peter getting Mary Jane sick from years of injecting radioactive semen into her and another where he turns into a giant spider and gives birth to himself.
  • As the first bosses of the beginning level appear: "OH! IT'S HIP-HOP BITCHES!"
  • "The first problem with this game is that Spider-Man is constipated."
    • Subsequently, Matt and Pat mocking Spider-Man's strange walking animation:
    Matt: That's very business-like.
    Pat: (as Spidey) I'm gonna go fuckin' save the world.
    Matt: (as Spidey) I'm gonna go totally save the world from Doc Ock and Sinister Six and then I'm just gonna go home and shoot Mary Jane full of radioactive spider jizz.
    Pat: (as Spidey) And then I got a meeting at six. I gotta get the Power Point ready.
    Matt: (as Spidey, through laughter) Jonah's gonna be crazy mad if I don't get it done.
  • Every time Matt mentions Spidey's lack of Spidey sense.
  • Matt and Pat's complete and utter confusion of the level design and strange villains in the second Spider-Man game they play.
  • "Watch out for that renegade Bunsen burner!"
  • "Man, science is kicking your ASS!"
  • Upon finally figuring out how to get down the manhole from the street level, Spider-Man drops down and is instantly killed by a guy in a gold mech suit.
    Matt: (through laughter) Master Chief is a fucking crackshot!
  • Their stunned silence at the Spider-Man 3 game's unbelievably awful web-slinging, followed by laughter. It must be seen to be believed.
  • "You cannot imagine the immensity of the fuck that Spider-Man does not give."
  • The ending featuring this infamous scene.

Xbox Indie Games II
  • After so many awful indie games, they find T.E.C. 3001. And completely lose their minds.
    • The developers actually thanked them for their endorsement of the game.
  • "Fuck, Pat, you're a wizard."
  • Matt deliberately missing button cues in Try Not to Fart.

Mass Effect 3
  • Matt's Futurama reference in the game's opening exposition.
    Matt: They found a place filled with Amazonian babes that love to snu-snu!
  • Matt and Pat insisting that a Spirit Bomb could solve all the problems in the game.
  • A giant laserbeam blows through an office window, causing an enormous desk to go flying and flatten a woman.
    Matt: OH! That desk is working with the Ravagers!
  • Their alternate interpretation of Shepard's reasons for trying to rescue a young boy in the airducts:
    Pat: (perverted voice) I gotta get this kid...
    Matt: (cracking up) Now's my only chance!
    Pat: The world's ending! No one will know!
  • "Tell me...when you see...a Radio Shack..."
  • After an emotional scene of the MC witnessing a kid he saved being blown up, when the character turns away, Pat exclaims in an absurd deep voice: "See you, fuckers!"
  • The duo pondering why the female robot has giant boobs.
    Matt: SHOOT HER SPACE TITS! (as Pat does and the robot woman falls) Oh, it worked!
  • One of the team members brings in an injured man wearing blue armor and Matt instantly moans, "Oh, Caboose!"
  • When they run into Diana Allers.
    Pat: Is that Jessica Chobot?
    Matt: Is that that girl who tells you stupid, outdated tips that are factually incorrect on Xbox Live Inside?
    Pat: Why's she dressed like a skank, and how come her face didn't... work good?
  • The montage of Shepard running in circles interspersed with footage of Earth being utterly wrecked.
    Pat: So you talk to the Admiral, right? And he's like, "Oh, it's been a hard couple of weeks, Shepard, but you're doing a good job out there!" and [Shepard's] like, "I've been dickin' around for a couple of WEEKS?!"

Prison Break: The Conspiracy
  • The beginning where Matt and Pat sit in annoyed silence staring at the start up screen for the game.
    Matt: Hey, remember that time in Prison Break where—
    Pat: No, I don't. I never fuckin' watched Prison Break. Did you even watch Prison Break?
    Matt: No.
    Pat: Why did you buy Prison Break?
    Matt: Because I've got mental problems.
  • Pat mocking the awful character mechanics.
    Scofield: I'm not here to make friends.
    Pat: Or lip synch well.
  • Their laughter at the fact that punching a black guard makes you fail instantly, with no fail screen and then...
    Pat: (repeatedly trying to punch a white guard only for the punches to magically keep missing) The white guy's invincible. This game is racist as shit!
  • Their reaction to every single cell having a "No Smoking" sign above it:
    Pat: Why would you...why couldn't you just tell them "No Smoking"? They're in fucking PRISON! Where are they going to GO? It's like "Ok, I know you had to smuggle like a whole CARTON of cigarettes up your ass...but no, you can't smoke them."
    Matt: [laughing] What's the point of smuggling in smokes when EVERY FUCKING CELL has a "No Smoking" sign?
  • Matt makes the PC randomly punch an inmate casually talking to another leading to a fight which he wins...and the inmate simply gets up, goes back to where he was an continues the conversation like nothing happened. Matt promptly makes the PC punch him again.
  • Pat lampshading how the main character is the worst undercover agent ever since he dictates As You Know notes about his evil Government Conspiracy employers into his miniature digital recorder while facing the bars of his cell in full view of half the cell block.
    Pat: Everyone fucking across him can look over and he's like [mumblemumblemumble]. "Are you INSANE or are you a fucking SNITCH?"
  • Matt mentioning the Falcon Punch.
  • Coming up to a Scary Black Man, Matt has this to say:
    Matt: Man, that's DMX! He's gonna give it to me.
  • Their reaction to finding out Scofield designed the prison:
    Pat: Why would they send him to the prison HE designed?!
    Matt: (through laughter) Because of reasons!
  • Both guys cracking up at getting caught despite the guard not turning his head to look at the escaped prisoner.
  • Their reaction to accidentally stumbling into the prison showers. Twice.
  • At the odd animation of a guard in front of a coffee machine:
    Pat: Is that guy takin' a piss?!
    Matt: Nah, he's getting coffee. WITH PISS IN IT!
  • Their hysterical laughter after the character tries to reach down and get a file and promptly falls out of the vent, failing the mission.
    Pat: WHY WOULD YOU WANNA BREAK OUT?! (cue end credits)

The Punisher
  • As with their Spider-Man video, they occassionally intersperse it with some facts about the Punisher comics, such as the period when he died and was drafted by Heaven into fighting demons (in their words "basically he became a shitty Ghostbuster") and "Franken-Castle". The "In the Marvel Mangaverse, the Punisher was a female Geisha who used a whip and tickled crime bosses to death. No, I'm serious" fact is brought up twice.
  • The duo's thoughts on the "good cop, bad cop" routine between the Punisher and an angry rhinoceros.
  • All of the Bond One Liners used by the Punisher, which are So Bad, It's Good and cause Matt and Pat to crack up whenever they hear them.
  • All of the dialogue from the nameless Mooks the Punisher kills who make countless Captain Obvious observations or completely lose their shit whenever Punisher shows up.
  • Shooting the Mooks with the .12 gauge shotgun makes them fly about fifteen feet through the air every... single...time. Words cannot do it justice.
  • Matt makes the Punisher throw one guy and the guy ends up lying on top of a hot dog cart, facedown, completely still so it looks like he's planking.
    • Another time Matt tosses a guy off a balcony while aiming at a burning cab on the street below... and the guy lands right on top of it.
      Matt: NAILED IT!
  • Fighting the Russian.
    Matt: "Get in my fridge, bitch!"
  • The end, where the Punisher is faced with two hostages being held at gunpoint and told "You can't save both!". Matt makes the Punisher chuck a grenade at the feet of the four and the explosion kills the gunmen...and the hostages remain unharmed.
    Pat: WHAT?! [cue credits]

Mortal Kombat: Shaolin Monks
  • Matt continuing to insist that either of the two Chinese playable characters are American.
  • Matt's suggestion of The Punisher being Johnny Cage, and Pat's excited confirmation.
  • Their reaction to whatever the hell flew across the moon that one of the characters noticed several minutes before it happened.
  • Pat's excitement over seeing Reptile.
  • Their disturbing glee upon finding a gigantic puddle of blood.
    Matt: Hey, dude, come frolic in the blood with me.
    Pat: I thought you'd never ask.
    Matt: Oh man, this reminds me of that one summer...
  • When their characters power up, Matt insists it's the power of Lubu.
  • Their laughter at the random suggestions that appear during the Game Over screens. Especially the one that says, "Find Mustapha."
    Pat: He's dead. He's with the Circle of Life now.
    Matt: Everything the light touches!
  • Matt's discovery that if Pat tries to jump over a pit of spikes while he's running in the opposite direction, it drags Pat back into the pit to die.
    Pat: (as he's being dragged) No, no, no, NOOOOOO! (dies and Matt cracks up)
    • Made especially funny by being a Brick Joke. At the start of the video, they discover that they can't hit each other. Matt notes that they'll probably find a way to kill each other eventually.
  • When they start running around in circles and lamenting the loss of Sonya.
    Pat: (sing song voice) What are we gonna dooooooo?
    Matt: We can't find our titties!
  • The episode ending with Pat having a Disney Acid Sequence upon discovering that Matt owns Mortal Kombat: Special Forces.
    Pat: Why would you even own this? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?

Metal Wolf Chaos
  • You don't even need their commentary to burst into laughter. The dialogue's just so bad.
  • Matt and Pat repeatedly crack up throughout the episode at the sheer absurdity of the premise.
    • The sheer absurdity of the premise alone and the hilariously mangled American culture is so hilarious that Matt and Pat don't even say anything at some points; sometimes they just let it pass without saying anything.
    YouTube Comment: It's like Japan and Michael Bay had some ungodly lovechild...
  • When the president is invoking a Macross Missile Massacre we get this jewel.
    Metal Wolf: (As he's bombarding an enemy fortress with missiles) How do you like me now?
  • Lampshading the fact that the reason for all of Michael Wilson's actions is "I'm the President of the United States."
  • The bit at the end, where Matt talks about the end of the season as if it were an election.
  • Their Nixon imitations, full stop:
    Pat: [Nixon voice] See, back when I was president we didn't HAVE these "giant robots". All we had was the worship of the Devil!
  • When they fight a giant tank named "Dorsey":
    Matt: Who names a tank like the most "old ladiest" name ever?
    Pat: [Nixon voice] This is out new tank: the "Meredith"! It's got tons of shit on it! You won't even fuckin' believe it!
    Matt: [Nixon voice] We also made an attack helicopter called the "Agatha"!
    Pat: [Nixon voice] It spins kinda slow!
    Matt: [Nixon voice] The Agatha asks if you would like some ribbon candy!
  • Any time they yell at the secretary for her incessant comments during battle sequences.
    • There is also her terrible codenames for missions, as well as the guys reaction to her ruining what would have been a romantic moment between her and Michael.
  • When the stereotypical robot voice announces that the giant later canon is about to self-destruct:
    Pat: Why did Soundwave just decide to kill himself?

    Season 5 Episodes 
Lollipop Chainsaw
  • Matt's attempts to look up Juliet's skirt results in two things: Juliet pushing her skirt down, and an achievement.
    Matt: I'm finally getting rewarded for my curiosity!
  • Pat's stories and anecdotes regarding girls' behaviour, which eventually have no endings, and eventually have no beginnings.

Steel Battalion: Heavy Armor
  • Pat playing on Kinect, which involves a lot of Pat waving his arms around in front of his face like a blind man.
  • The ending, when Matt and Pat "play around" with the self-destruct switch.

Max Payne 3
  • The opening animated sequence with Matt and Pat flying straight at each other in slow-mo, firing their guns, and then both hit the ground spinning in circles due to the uncontrollable gun fire.
  • "Max Payne 3: Friendship is Magic. That's the subtitle."
  • Somehow, Matt manages to get himself trapped in the background scenery. Pat is dumbstruck.
  • Matt decides to try the multiplayer. Cue the montage of Matt dying in multiplayer, ending with a screen saying that he is quitting the multiplayer.
    Matt: Maybe I should give multiplayer a try, I'm pretty good at Max Payne, so...
  • The segments where the duo makes Max Payne roll around on the floor while they play unfitting music.
  • Matt unloads half a clip of ammo into a civilian before realizing he's not one of the bad guys.
    Pat: That's just a dude.
    Matt: What? He had a mask on.
    Pat: No, he didn't.
    Matt: See, I'm getting shot!
    Pat: From some guy upstairs.
    Matt: (pauses, stares at the dead body) Oh, no, not again!
  • Matt dive-rolling against random civilians hiding from gunfire.
    Matt: Hey, guys! C'mon!
    Pat: (in a Spanish accent as a civvie) Is this the new dance you Americans created?
  • Matt slow-mo diving off of a skyscraper. Pat busts out laughing and Matt sheepishly says, "Whoops" at the failscreen. The best part is that he does this again about five minutes later, screaming, "FUCK YOU, RIO DE JANEIRO!" while Pat points out that he's in Sao Paulo.
  • "Your dick is dead! I will murder all your dicks!"
  • Matt screaming at Max's incredibly slow turn to aim at a guy who is shooting him. "FUCKING SHOOT HIM! Shoot him, you son of a bitch!"
  • "Girls gone wild up in Max Payne's beard!"
  • "Either look at my face and die or shut up and don't live!"

Game of Thrones
  • Their lyrics for the theme song that plays on the title screen, where Matt, Pat, and Woolie excitedly chant "GAME OF FUCKIN' THRONES!" repeatedly in a reference to this video.
  • Matt recalls a part in Final Fantasy XII where villagers lament about cactoids ruining their home... and the camera cuts to the monsters, only six in number and just dancing in place.
  • Messing with the camera to get a look inside a body.
    "Go back a little bit... there's his eyeballs!"
  • Pat, Mat, and Woolie constantly make fun of how bad the dog looks. It culminates with them freezing the video at a particular moment, just zooming in on the dog while they go all out on it.
    Pat: It looks like a fucking PS1 monster!
  • The trio complains about how there are almost no recognizable characters from the show or the books in the game, and muse about how the game is probably only ever going to show the worst character from the series, which they all agree is Cersei. Guess what happens later.
  • When they finally finish fine-tuning their character's strengths and weaknesses, he ends up being a bad leader who can't stand the sight of blood, but is gifted, an acrobat, and knows the art of medicine, leading Pat to come up with this scenario:
    Pat: So what this is saying that as you're fighting dudes, and some guy gets all bloodied up, and you decide to fuck off and not tell your dudes what to do, and just start doing back-flips while rubbing salve all over your face.

Batman Dark Tomorrow
  • Matt's appreciation of Poison Ivy's character model.
    "Look at that BADONKADONK!"
  • Their continued exasperation at having to handcuff every single Mook, capped off by Matt's suggestion to handcuff their dicks to their wrist watches.
  • Pat's discovery of Batman's ability to backflip, which he immediately does for about 30 straight seconds.
  • "Man, look at THOSE titties!"
  • The first time the duo tries to get Batman to swing to another building. It is pure gold.
  • "That car is working for the Joker!"
  • Matt's laughter at the fact that one Mook tries to kick Batman while holding a machine gun.
  • Pat's Rage Quit at the end, capped off with him saying, "Die, Batman. Just...die. I hate you."

NES, SNES, & Genesis Games
  • Pat starts quoting Kung Pow! when he and Matt's characters continue to fail jumping from one rooftop to the next.
    "Don't you see? You can't make it! You'll never make it!"
  • The duo finding out what happens if you stand near the tentacle in "Out of This World."
  • "You took a slug to the knee! And you're fuckin' dead."
  • Matt referencing Dangeresque while they play "Out of This World."
    "I'm gonna have to JUMP!"
  • The bit with the Cavemen where Matt won't let Pat onto the platform. Pat finally gets up there and then Matt jumps up onto the rope above it, leaving Pat there in a complete stupor about how that worked.
  • Upon seeing the bloody Superman emblem for the Doomsday game: "...Superman has his period?"
  • The following exchange:
    Matt: Why'd you just rape those pigs?
    Pat: Did you see how they were dressed?
  • Pat's fanboy excitement over Rocket Knight Adventures.
  • Their delightful conversation discussing how much Scott Summers, aka Cyclops, sucks. Capped off by insisting that if any of the viewers' friends claim Cyclops doesn't suck, they should be punched in the dick.
  • Just like last time, Matt continues to not get RPG games, much to Pat's frustration.

Sleeping Dogs
  • Matt's reaction upon finding out Emma Stone is in the game:
    During the opening credits
    Pat: (referring to Jackie) Oh he's that skeez-ball that you use.
    Matt: EMMA STONE!?!
    Pat: Calm down.
  • Matt performing a roundhouse kick to a bus. In his underwear.
    Matt: Fuck you, bus!
  • This exchange:
    Matt takes a picture of a his date's breasts
    Matt: That's going in the photo book.
    Pat: ... You're sending these to her.
  • This nice aversion of Artificial Stupidity when a policeman climbs over a railing to reach Matt
    Matt: OH SHIT, WAIT NO! THEY CAN CLIMB! NO NO NO! *gets caught* Oh fuck!
    Pat: What are you, stupid?
  • They various puns they use when they finish off enemies.
    Pat: That's too much Wei! That's Wei too much!
    • When they throw a thug in a phone booth.
    Matt: I'm gonna call long distance, bitch!
    • After they shove a thug's head through a fan.
    Matt: I guess he's not a fan of my fighting style.
  • Any of the antics they do when the character is in his underwear. In including crashing a motorbike by a building freaking out the nearby people.
    Matt: *laughs* Deal with it!
  • Matt's obsession with the $30 Dragon Kick.
  • Matt stopping in the middle of being chased by the police to order food.
    Matt: I'd like a peanut butter dumpling.
    Pat: I'd like some sesame chicken, I guess.
  • Matt and Pat explaining what happened when Wei went to America.
    Matt: What did they do to me in America? They made better, stronger, and faster!
    Pat: I had to fight RoboCop on the streets for cash. It was sick.
  • Matt making Wei run in circles while going, "Woop woop woop woop woop woop!"
  • "You have like a little treehouse in your bonsai tree."
  • "Kicking guys when they're down, just like John Wayne woulda done!"
  • The duo trying to explain the randomly vibrating box of vegetables.
    Pat: It's, it's, it's Hong Kong Jumping Leeks. Or whatever the fuck that is.
  • The creepy pork bun vender. 'Nuff said.
  • The entire sequence when they find out Wei can randomly jack cars and motorcyles in mid-crash.
    Matt: It's to impress girls!
    Pat: That'll impress EVERYBODY!
  • The random citizen pouring water over Wei in his underwear.
    Matt: AW, SO GOOD GIRL.
  • Matt making Emma Stone hump him from behind.
  • The intro and outro, instead of having some amusing game moment, literally feature sleeping dogs. Even funnier is that Matt and Pat just stare in awe.
  • "Stop smoking! Stop it! It's bad! Think of the children!"
  • The part where they make Wei jump on a phone booth while they say "Hey, phone booth! No working for Dog Eyes!"
  • "My cock will destroy all the other cocks!
  • "Beat up the drunken asshole"
    Pat': This is the best game of all time!
  • Watching the man pee.
  • Pat's failure to come up with any good puns.
  • As they're running through the marketplace, they pass an ice cream vendor.
    Matt: Wha—Ice cream?!
    Pat: (completely serious) Where?

The Amazing Spider-Man
  • The opening animation where Spider-Man swings down and Matt and Pat stare at him in awe...only for him to knock the ice cream cones out of their hands and then punch them in their faces.
  • The bus glitch in its entirety. Especially with the Call Back to Sleeping Dogs.
    Matt: Man, that bus that we kicked in Sleeping Dogs is out for revenge!
  • The duo making Spider-Man run up and web random citizens in the face, which is made better by the fact that no one reacts to this phenomenon.
  • The duo blaming Dr. Connors for giving Gwen Stacy an antidote that made her grow penises all over.
  • "Don't look in my closet where I keep all my other dumber costumes!"
  • All of the sequences of Matt and Pat reading the comic books and paraphrasing what's happening.
    Matt: And Aunt May's all like, 'Stop making spider-bats at 2am, you son of a bitch!'
  • Their conclusion that the Scorpion is actually just Condom Coat-Hanger Man.
  • Matt's Ace Ventura Pet Detective comment while looking at the Rhino's character model.
    Matt: (focuses on Rhino's butt) Watch Jim Carrey come birthing out of this hole.
  • Spider-Man inexplicably running around with a birthday hat on his head.
    Matt: Thanks, everyone! It's been a real good birthday!

  • In a reversal of what's expected, Matt is ridiculously happy about playing the scary game (he's only upset that he doesn't get to punch Slenderman), while Pat spends the length of it being terrified.
    • This is proven by the first few seconds of the video that start with Pat going, "Ohhhhhhhhhhh, I don't wanna play this."
  • "Turn off your light and run. Your face is now buried in Slenderman's crotch."
  • All the instances of Pat being unable to hide how creeped out he is.
    Matt: Show everyone how tough you are!
    Pat: I'm so tough I'm on the verge of tears!
  • Pat lamenting the fans who voted for them to play this game.
    Pat: I want to punch everyone who asked for us to play this game in the face.
  • Matt's idea about how to placate Slenderman.
    "Hello, Slenderman? If I suck your dick, will you please let me out of this forest?"

Pokémon Snap
  • They start right off by naming their character "ShtLord".
  • Performing a sick combo tossing apples at a Pikachu.
  • The Kangaskhan Dance.
  • The slutty Squirtle.
  • "Two Best Friends are blasting off again!"

Tekken Tag Tournament 2
  • As TTT2 has elements of being a spoof on the series, a lot of the funny moments were built right into the game, such as Dragunov's robot girlfriend and Kuma's photo op with the school girls.
  • As things go poorly for Matt:
    Matt: You didn't tell me you were gonna beat me!
    Pat: I tell you every day that I'm going to beat you!
  • Thanks to custom soundtracks, they chose to use the soundtrack from Ocarina of Time, causing massive Soundtrack Dissonance.

Way of the Samurai 4
  • The two get constantly cockblocked by the police while trying to get to a place where a woman was waiting for them. After many failed attempts, they just go do the mission.
  • Delicious Time!
  • They keep on throwing barrels at people.
  • Their failure of hitting on one woman results in them hitting on an old lady.
  • The "Can someone please help me kill myself" option.
    Pat: He's like "I can't believe what a fucking badass that guy was."
    Matt: He's the last of the O Gs.
  • When making their samurai:
    Pat: Do you want him to be tender in the face?
    Matt: I like my guys tender in the face.
    Pat: It's hard to tell if he a man or a woman.
    Matt: He's been tenderized!

Borderlands 2
  • The comments about Milo.
    Pat: Milo is dead. Peter Molyneux took him out back and killed him with his nuts.
    Matt: What? I thought you were gonna say he just puts two in his brain.
    Pat: Yeah. He puts both of his nuts in Milo's brain and Milo just dies.
  • Matt stops playing the game to stare at Moxxi. Later on in the video, they cut back to Matt still staring at Moxxi, and Pat says "Go shoot something already!"
    • Matt points out that he finds clowns scary, but thinks Moxxi is pretty hot. This conflict confuses him.
  • The comments near the end of the first mission.
    Matt: That's really transparent.
    Pat: You know what else is really transparent? My dick.
    (really long silence)
    Pat: You gotta let that hang.
  • Their reaction to someone saying "I used to be a Vault Hunter like you, until I took a bullet to the knee"- lots of sarcastic laughing, followed by Pat saying "I don't get it."
  • Two Best Friends Play is now canceled! (Just kidding)

    Season 6 Episodes 
Assassin's Creed III
  • The Hamburger of Eden.
  • This line from the first few minutes:
    Pat: (as Haytham while moving through the aisles) Please get your powdered wig out of my ass, please.
    • "Hey, guys. Stop making out, you're in the theater."
    Matt: His face is pressed firmly into her 17th century bosoms.
  • While exiting the packed lobby of the opera house:
    • Walking in the lobby:
    Matt: Hey, is that Louis XIV?
    Pat: It's some big... stupid... French guy.
  • "Can I just fall off and die? YES I CAN."
  • The two killing a cat, a pig, and a woman, and their subsequent reactions.
  • Pat's reaction when he attempts to ride a horse off of a cliff, only for it to stop and not jump.
    Pat: (spurring the horse onward) Go horse! Fuck it! (Jumps off the horse and into the lake)
  • Matt labeling important historical figures as "total chodes".
  • "I think an old black man beating the shit out of a kid with a cane is the best thing ever."
  • "That rabbit won't be reporting back to the Templars anytime soon!"
  • After the ship is fired on in a naval battle:
    Matt: No!
    Pat: Whatever, he sucked anyways.
  • Also while on the ship:
    Pat: I was yawning because I was bored and then ocean scared me. I guess the game won.

Resident Evil 6
  • The opening, in which Matt smiles gleefully while running over Pat with a train.
  • Matt getting shot to death because he was too busy making Piers give Chris a thumbs up. ("WE HAVE TO ENCOURAGE EACH OTHER- FUCK!")
    Pat: No Matt, no. I don't want to do a good job anymore.
  • Pat and his glee upon seeing the playground in Chris's campaign"
    Pat: (as he runs towards the playground) I HAVE TO GET WHAT REALLY MATTERS.
    • Matt finding out he can clip over Pat when the latter rides playground equipment.
    Pat: This is the state of Survival Horror right here.
    Matt (Leaps over the ride and through Pat): Yeahhh!
  • Pat examining a manhole while Matt slides around on his ass in the background.
  • Pat, while trying to find Matt in a snowstorm, accidentally rams him with a snowmobile, knocking him down. Matt starts sliding down the mountain, screaming for help, Pat driving after him. Pat soon picks up too much speed, running Matt over and getting a game over.
    • Not to mention Matt genuinely seems horrified by all of this.

Guild Wars 2
  • The following exchange:
    Matt: That's some Dobby shit.
    Pat: That does look like Dobby... I mean, wait, who's Dobby?

New Super Mario Bros. U
  • The entire video because of the sheer Video Game Cruelty Potential of the game. But especially when Pat stuns an enemy over Matt and Woolie so that they can only escape by killing themselves.
  • Yellow Toad is the only survivor, and is swimming to an escape pipe before a sea dragon eats him. Matt quips, "Man, that dragon really wants that succulent Toad ass." The player, a woman, starts to scream in rage right before the video cuts off. Funny on a meta level because we don't know who the toad players are and you don't really hear their voices throughout.

Scribblenauts Unlimited
  • Matt's absolutely brutal Your Mom joke.
    Matt: Clean the pig, okay.
    (Matt types in "Industrial Vacuum", only for it to be rejected)
    Matt: Scrub the pig!
    Pat: Wait, can you scrub the pig with a regular vacuum?
    Matt: No, cause "vacuum" isn't red. How do you clean your mom?
    (An unseen girl "ohhs" in the background)
    Pat: .....shut up.
  • How Matt plans to get out of the tutorial area.
    Matt: I'm gonna take the bus.
    Pat: You have a book that will summon any object in the universe and a globe that will teleport you anywhere in the world.
    Matt: Fuck it, I shouldn't have to wait for a bus! (Types in bus, and summons one)
    Pat: That's my whole point I was making! (Matt starts driving the bus) (In disbelief) Wait, you ju-
    Matt: See you later fuckers!
  • Matt trying to do pest control by summoning bigger and bigger animals to kill each other. This culminate in him fighting Bowser while riding a giant bear.
  • Matt attempting to calm down a lady zombie by giving her a pug, which she promptly turns into a zombie, much to their horror. Matt than summons a Neogaf to escape, much to Pat's shock.
  • Them cracking up over when they give a dog a fireman's hat and the dog rides in a firetruck.
  • Their horror when one of the museum patrons is a giant stick figure.
    Matt: Is this Silent Hill?
  • When they have to help feed a fat kid, Matt types in a Roasted Pheasant, which summons a pheasant cooked alive, which the fat kid promptly eats.
  • Immediately after reading the disclaimer that the game's notepad is unable to utilize copyrighted properties, the guys write down "Mario" as a possible idea... and Nintendo's Mario is what they get.
    Matt: Mario, can you help us out here?

  • Matt to Pat on the matter attraction, not to mention the completely nonchalant way he says it:
    Matt: There's no way a woman can be that hot, she's gonna be a man.
  • The montage of Matt's many, many in-game deaths.
  • Matt's habit of picking up dead bodies and pretend they're alive returns:
    Pat: Mom will be so proud when I bring you home!
    Matt: (pretending to be the protagonist's mother, with a terrible English accent to boot) Finally, you're dating a proper English woman—I love it! I like her skull face.
  • Pat and Matt's outrage at the prices at the deli.
  • Pat's impression of the Queen of England at a rave:
    Pat: I can't believe how great these fat beats are!!
  • While exploring a ransacked, rundown apartment:
    Matt: If Woolie owned an apartment in London.
    Pat: If Woolie owned an apartment.

Far Cry 3
  • Matt and Pat's utter loathing and disgust at the Twenty Minutes with Jerks opening to the game.
    Matt: "Welcome to Sex Island. Look at all these animals you can have sex with."
    Pat: "I'm gonna fuck that bird with this coconut!"
    Matt: This is the worst.
  • Matt shoots a dead boar several times in the head, prompting this exchange:
    Pat: Man, you're sick.
    Matt: Whatever, you killed a cat. In Assassin's Creed.
    Pat: Cats suck.

XBOX Indie Games III
  • Tricky Treat, which consists entirely of a person floating around a glitchy map full of giant candies.
    Pat: Oh my g- oh my god...words can't even...oh my god.
  • Any of their reactions to Who's Gonna Get The Girl?
    Matt: (as one of the, rather odd-looking, girls) ERMAGHERD YOU LIKE MY NAME.
  • They play No Luca No for quite a while, which is hilarious considering that the entire game consists of them swatting a cat away from their breakfast.
  • Their reactions while playing Super Wagon Adventure and its multiple anachronisms and wackiness is pretty great.

Cabela's Dangerous Hunts 2013
  • One of the cutscenes shows a character staring at some deer through a sniper scope while Matt says "These deer killed my entire family and slaughtered them." The camera then pans over to reveal the character's father, which causes him to add "Oh, wait-".
  • Pat saying "That deer will never walk again or play basketball with its homies" after Matt shoots one of them in the spine.
  • Their remarks about a conveniently-placed health pack in the woods.
    Matt: It's good that all these animals left these health packs for me.
    Pat: I'm glad that health packs literally grow on trees out in the wild.
  • "Even the trees have gained bloodlust."
  • Their reactions to the various glitches, which include animals hopping in midair and falling off cliffs unintentionally, are pretty hilarious.
  • Pretending that the animals are conspiring against them on two occasions- the first when they find a conviently-placed ammo pile, and the second when they're in a jeep, the trees collapse, and some predators leap out at them from the branches.
  • Matt saying "It's a herd of your mom!" after seeing a herd of elephants.
  • The exchange after seeing a panther.
    Matt: It's Panther Caruso.
    Pat: Who?
    Matt: That weird Star Fox character-
    Pat: From CSI?
    Matt: Yeah, Panther Caruso. From CSI.
    Pat: Yeaaaaah!

Harry Potter Kinect
  • Their entire rant about Fawkes the Phoenix and their inability to give him a handjob.
    • Funnier still, the Call Back joke during the fight with the Slytherin serpent.
    Matt: Hey, there's that bird we gave a handjob to earlier!
    Pat: And now he's trying to fuck the snake!
  • The Actor Allusion regarding Snape.
    Pat: You have to do Potions or else Nakatomi Plaza will go up in flames!
    • And subsequently, when fighting Snape...
    Pat: Let Holly go!!
  • Harry's arms freaking out during Charms class.
    Pat: This is the sickest beat-break dancing I've ever seen!
  • The poorly thought out sequence of Professor Quirrell assaulting Harry, which looks a lot like he's trying to rape him, as Matt and Pat point out. Hilariously.
  • Matt's Waxing Lyrical of Master Onion's Stage as Snape.
  • Making Hermione defeat the troll by basically rubbing her butt and leaning slightly to the side.
  • All of the perving Matt does on Hermione and Emma Watson, which Pat quickly points out the plothole in. It's even funnier when Matt acknowledges that it makes no sense.
  • Pat's conclusion that Voldemort figured out that wizards don't need noses.
  • Their conversation about Wormtail trying to appeal to Ron after living in his pants for several years.
    Pat: (as Wormtail) Ron, didn't you love it when I slept next to your dick every night when you were sad about Hermione?
    Matt: And Ron's like, "YEA—NO! No, I didn't!"
  • Matt's complete disdain for Neville Longbottom, capped off by him intentionally letting him die multiple times.
  • The glitch in the final wand battle. It must be seen to be believed.
  • Their addressing of the concept behind the last Quidditch minigame where they defend their goal from the opposing team, saying that their own team must be pretty awful if they're letting a lot of opponents get by them.
  • Them pointing out that Luna's hotter than Cho.

Hitman: Absolution
  • The video's intro has cartoon Matt and Pat patrolling the streets in police uniforms, when Matt is grabbed from behind. When Pat looks behind him, he sees a more realistically-styled Agent 47 in the police uniform, but thinks nothing of it and continues patrolling.
  • Their reactions to the various game mechanics, like fake surrendering, lowering their head to get past guards, and the flame trails guards leave, are pretty amusing.
  • Their comments about the various disguises, like the gardener's method of shooting weeds to death or the chef disguise's reverse-grip-style of holding a kitchen knife, are pretty hilarious.
  • "It's Mardi Gras up in here!" Said while making Agent 47 move in a circle through a colorful bead curtain.
  • When they start calling Agent 47 "Dickman", and the subsequent comments, starting with "Dickman, I can't believe what a hit you are!"
  • The exchange when Agent 47 is holding a coin.
    Matt: Here's a coin. Put it in an Incan temple. Get Nathan Drake to help.
    Pat: Here's a coin. It's got Barack Obama's face on it.
    Matt: I thought you were gonna say it's got Baraka's face on it.
  • Pat sarcastically remarking "He's framing the legendary Hitman, who's killed a billion people, for murder!" and "'Oh no, a murder! I've never seen that before!'" during a scene where Agent 47 wakes up with a dead maid nearby.
  • Matt's insistence that a character resembles Kevin Nash.
    Matt: (As the group is leaving) C'mon Nash, let's get going.
    Pat: N'OHKAY...
    Matt: We gotta save Scott Hall from killing himself.
    Pat: (barely restrained laughter) f-f-fuck
  • Their attempt to start a bar fight in a level. They throw a bottle into a crowd... and get no reaction. Appropriately, they react with a sarcastic "yaaaaaay".
  • In the final segment, they find Lynch at a gun range. After trying to mess with him, everyone suddenly points their guns at Agent 47, leaving the two very bewildered.
  • Dragging the guy they killed at the tennis court around in tight circles, causing the body to twist in on itself.
    Pat: Thanks next-gen graphics.
  • Their reactions to the huge amounts of lens flare, which even radiates from 47's bald head:
  • Also:
    Pat: (while looking at 47's glowing head) THE HITMAN HAS BECOME YOUR LORD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST.

Playstation All-Stars Battle Royale
  • Pat pointing out that the one of versus character splashes they were looking at had a proper juxtaposition of character images that made it look like Drake was staring at Fat Princess' chest. They bring it up again at the end of the match, where Drake is looking in the other direction during the post-match results display, with them pretending that Drake was no longer interested in them.
  • When Woolie and Liam get in on the action, Matt and Pat ask them how the supers work. Liam gives an extremely simple explanation, and Woolie's explanation is instead filled with unhelpful and irrelevant Techno Babble before being cut off by a screen saying "NOBODY CARES".
  • The four are ready to start a match, and the character select screen shows them with different characters selected. When the match starts proper, though, it turns out that they all selected Raiden. This happens twice.
    • Complete with them gushing over how awesome Raiden is, with Matt noting that if someone told him ten years earlier that Raiden would be cooler than Dante, he would've felt obligated to punch them.
      Woolie: The guys want him and the girls want to be him!
  • The last match is a team stock battle, with Matt and Pat against Woolie and Liam. Things were looking grim for the latter team, with Woolie eliminated some time beforehand and Matt and Pat still in the game, but Liam comes from behind to win it for his team. The following exchange occurs-
    Liam: Suck it! Suck it!
    Pat: Why are you telling Woolie to suck it?
    Liam: He died too.

DmC: Devil May Cry
  • During a cutscene, one character mentions an "old Wiccan recipe" that contains sea salt, shark oil, iron shavings, dessicated squirrel semen, and wolf hair.
    Matt: What.
    Pat: Okay. I have, like, ten questions.
  • They fuck around on Vergil's car while it's slo-mo crashing into a wall.
  • The repeated shots of them slowly defeating a boss by just shooting it while it sits there. After a few cuts to the fight, they finally kill it, and they are quite underwhelmed with the whole thing at the end.

    Season 7 Episodes 
Slender: The Arrival
  • The episode opens with Matt admitting that, after displaying no fear in the original Slender, he has since watched Marble Hornets, and is now terrified of Slender Man.
    • That being said, he still fares a lot better than Pat during the game. To the point of trolling Pat while he's terrified:
    Pat: (incoherent blubbering)
    Matt: There's a door on your left! No there's not, I lied to you, you're fucked!
    Pat: (in high pitched voice) Oh no!
    Matt: I trolled you about that door!
    Pat: (More incoherent blubbering)
  • Slender/Winnie The Pooh.
  • Pat getting so scared that he won't even do the Tour Guide Nixon voice.
  • The grand finale:
    Matt: If you're just joining us, you're watching Best Friends! We've both just shat our pants!
  • The opening features Matt being knocked out by the player character after he scares her, resulting in a Slenderman who pops up in disappointment after the player character runs away. Pat then appears behind Slenderman, looking at Matt's body and slowly backing away in fear.
  • All of Pat's high pitched squealing.
  • Pat gets scared by a grand piano and shortly after a window scares Matt.

Tomb Raider (2013)
  • Matt makes Lara go inside a house as it begins to fall off a cliff. As it falls into the abyss, Lara stands calmly on top of it with no reaction as it plummets off-screen.
  • At one point, they start falling off a cliff, but Lara just ends up floating in midair doing the falling animation. They actually manage to make her climb back up the cliffside for a bit until she properly dies.

Injustice: Gods Among Us
  • The running gag with Woolie. It starts off with him signing on and his Gamertag being " yo whens mahvel" , and sending a request to play Ultimate Marvel Vs. Capcom 3. Later, Matt gets a phone call and the caller is " WHENS MAHVEL" . Then, Matt looks out the apartment window and sees Woolie holding up a sign saying "WHEN'S MAHVEL?" . At the end of the video, after hilariously failing a mission with Superman, Matt hears a knock on the door and it turns out to be Woolie again.
  • Similar to the Batman: Arkham City episode, they start by playing the wrong game in a similar genre: Justice League Task Force, the Super Nintendo Justice League fighting game. They try to fix the TV, and switch to Mortal Kombat vs. DC Universe. They fix the TV again and finally switch to the game. They choose Batman vs Batman for all 3 fights.
  • The Batman vs Batman fight in a nutshell.
    Matt: So, what's Batman's flowchart again?
    Pat: Batarangs, all the time!
  • Matt's Long List of Rob Liefeld super heroes who should have been in this game.
  • Playing with the hanging meat in the Arkham Asylum stage.
  • The comments during the Harley Quinn vs. Sinestro fight. A sample-
    Matt: (in a high-pitched voice) Oh, Mr. Sinestro! I won't have the meat loaf ready cooked for you until later tonight-
    Pat: Harley Quinn isn't your grandma!

Far Cry 3: Blood Dragon
  • When the video starts proper, Woolie shows up at Matt's apartment with some ice cream sandwiches. Later on, Matt wonders where Woolie went, and Pat says that he told Woolie to fuck off, because Woolie ran out of ice cream.
  • The segment Pat growing increasingly frustrated with the tutorial is pretty amusing.
  • Pat attempts to mock read a loading screen tooltip, but constantly stumbles over the first two words, "sniper rifle", and eventually gives up.
  • They pretend that the person they're rescuing in "Save A Nerd" is James Rolfe.
  • Pat freaks out when he realizes the blue coiled thing he was checking out was a neon snake, and kills it with grenades.
  • "Punch the nuclear reactor"
    Pat: Are you fucking serious? I am okay with this!
  • Matt gets mad that Pat shoots and teabags a dead scientist because Rex called the scientist an American hero.

Star Trek
  • The Running Gag throughout the video where they mock the bad collision detection for the character models, leading to repeated views of the insides of Spock's head... and attempts to put the characters inside each other.
    • During a multiplayer match, Pat's screen loads with the camera zoomed in super close to Spock's face and clipping through his head.
  • When Kirk is using the scanner, Spock's model unexpectedly becomes huge and sinks into the floor.
    Pat: This is how big Spock is in Kirk's heart.
  • When Spock randomly sprints away from Kirk, they follow only to find him standing next to the hot green alien babe, to which Matt cries, "Hey! That's MY green chick!"
  • All of their "swag" and "YOLO" references. Especially Kirk holding up a device and Matt insisting that he's going to take a selfie while making a duck face.
  • Matt's suggestion that they just push two Red Shirts off a cliff to spare them the misery of dying during a mission.
  • The episodes ends with Kirk and Spock on a teleporter. Matt and Pat wonder where it will take them. Just then, the title screen for Aliens: Colonial Marines kicks in and Matt and Pat scream in fear until the credits cut them off.

Aliens: Colonial Marines
  • Pat, Matt, and Woolie's bored reactions to the supposedly scary xenomorphs.
  • The live action segments, which consist of Matt and Pat wandering around an industrial area with helmets and guns while Woolie gives them orders. Funnier since it's one of the few times we've seen Pat in person.
  • The return of clipping through character models.
    Matt: We played Star Trek last week!
    • Even funnier when a marine opens a grate and jumps down a ventilation shaft. Matt and Pat jump through the marine, through the grate, and stand where the marine will jump down so he clips through them constantly.
  • A xenomorph slowly stalks them by opening a ventilation shaft and clawing at them from the ceiling. The Jump Scare is ruined when they notice the xenomorph is nice enough to close the shaft after it attacks. Even when the xenomorph kills them, it's still polite enough to close the grate shut.

The Walking Dead: Survival Instinct
  • The intro video has Matt and Pat shooting Zombie Lee and Zombie Kenny. They're having trouble with the final foe, though: Activision!
  • The video starts off with Matt walking to a store to buy "The shitty Walking Dead game." The store clerk, a young asian woman, knows exactly which one it is and turns around to grab it. The camera slowly pans down as she grabs the game then quickly corrects itself. Matt asks her out on a date and she politely turns him down. Throughout the rest of the episode, Matt brags to Pat that he has a hot date with an asian chick on Friday.
  • While noting how easy it is to melee attack zombies and keep them away, they mention it's like a zombie version of "No, Luca, no."
  • They're utterly surprised that the knife swinging animation causes sparks and smoke even when it hits nothing but air.
    Matt: This makes me think I'm stabbing a tiny man!
  • They hammer the Jess Collins model's butt and crotch with the hammer, and mock its seeming lack of care for what they're doing to it.

Mortal Kombat: Komplete
  • While playing Konquest:
    Matt: There's a sexy party over there.
    Pat: Three guys standing in a river.
    *Upon further inspection*
    Both of them: Oh it's just ducks.
    Matt: Well it's still a sweet ass party- I wish I can join.
  • Still on the topic of ducks:
  • Their failed attempts to impersonate Claude Van Damme.
  • Pat's repeated smashing by the death pillars in Mythologies.

Xbox Live Indie Games IV

WWE '13
  • The round with Matt, Pat and Woolie playing as... themselves.
    • Woolie's intro, with his character wearing those goofy headphones that he never takes off as well as a 'WHENS MAHVEL' shirt.
    Woolie: Mahvel is now, suckas!
    • Pat trying to attack from the ropes and getting interrupted by Woolie, leaving Pat unable to do anything other than slap impotently in the general direction of his opponents. He finally manages to jump off with a bodyslam... which he misses.
    • Pat once again climbs onto the ropes to attempt a bodyslam on Matt, who is outside the ring. He pulls it off with ease this time... but still misses.
    Pat: Eat it! *thud*
    Everyone bursts out laughing
    • Woolie inexplicably going on a 'Comeback' and turning invulnerable, with his character not even reacting in the slightest to Pat hitting him in the face with a chair.
  • After Woolie takes round two:
    Woolie: Oh, what I got comin' backstage. I've got the hottest jacuzzi backstage and-
    Matt: With no-one in it!
    Pat: Liam's in there.
    Post-match scores: Hot Tub Liam inspires Woolie to win again!
  • The final round, with Matt, Pat and Woolie playing as the Shockmaster, Reptile and Zubaz respectively.
    • An instance in this round where while Pat and Woolie are fighting over by the commentator's table, Matt is leaning the ladder up against the ropes to use it. He runs up the ladder, but with his character using a really awkward running animation to do so, jumps off at them...and completely misses. Words cannot do this scene justice.

    Season 8 Episodes 
Saints Row IV
  • When given the famous "Fuck Cancer" or "Let Them Eat Cake" option, the two of them spend (according to a joke cutaway) 2 hours overanalzying this intentional parody of moral choices in games.
    Matt: Ok wait, we gotta think about this.
    Pat: Cancer forever is way worse than hungriness.
    Matt: It doesn't say 'no one goes hungry forever'.
    Pat: No it doesn't. It means give everyone a sandwich right now.
    Matt: Okay, think about curing cancer, there's evil people that could have cancer.
    Pat: Yeah but there's probably way more good people that have cancer. It's not like 50/50. Like what if feed the hungry, is you just nuke the hungry countries?
    Matt: That's true too. We can't read the fine print!
    Pat: No!
    Matt: Okay, if Woolie was here, he would...
    Pat: He would feed the hungry.
    Matt: Okay but, he's not fucking here.
    Pat: I say fuck cancer.
    Matt: I dunno I'm leaning towards fuck canc- but when you think about it, if you feed the hun-
    Black screen that says '2 hours later'
    Matt: No but if the people that die from cancer, we can't feed them.
    Pat: That's what you'd be doing.
    Matt: No, no!
    Matt: Fuck it, cure cancer!

Grand Theft Auto V
  • The beginning, which has Matt running around trying to find a store that has a copy of Grand Theft Auto V in stock. He fails, but Pat calls Matt and gloats about how he got the last copy of GTA V.
  • While waiting for the Data Install to finish, the two talk about all sorts of things, such as...
    • Pat asking Matt if he's watched Attack on Titan.
    • Matt saying that Rockstar should have given the player a papercraft to work on while waiting for the Data Install.
    • Matt talking about the time he and Pat went to Switzerland.
    • And when the Data Install is finally done (Said Data Install taking about 18 minutes according to Pat), their reaction when they're told to insert the second disc.

Beyond Two Souls
  • The beginning, in which they mock how David Cage's games are formatted like movies by checking the local movie theater for Beyond Two Souls.
  • Matt's reaction to an NPC in-game named Matt. When they find out he's British, Matt starts calling him British Matt and they give him a Sega fanboy personality with the voice of James Small, a British guy they often make fun of for loving the Dreamcast.
  • Press X to Revenge. REVENGE! Pat urges Woolie to be the instrument of his revenge.
    • Said revenge, with all three of them super-hyped, is also hilarious.
  • The Jojo comparison:
    Pat: I'll be the little girl and you will be the big, scary ghostman.
    Woolie: I'll be your STAND!
    Pat: OH, MY GOD!
    Matt: Stop trying to make this cool! STOP IT!

Assassin's Creed IV Black Flag
  • The Duo singing their theme song as a pirate shanty.
  • The guys start this season by playing the PlayStation 4 version of Assassin's Creed IV and they keep getting a kick out of the game's hilarious technical "issues":
    • They toss a body into the ocean and laugh at how the body just turns itself around without the character model really moving. "That's next gen for ya."note 
    • They climb up a building and literally get right behind an enemy soldier, and the soldier does not react at all when Edward starts clipping through him and tossing money at his ass.
    • Edward climbs to the top of the mast of a sinking ship and barely reacts at all to the mast plummeting towards the ocean.
  • The return of James Small jokes, where every British person is portrayed as a Sega fanboy obsessed with the Sega Dreamcast and Master System.
  • Matt suggests throwing money at a dog and seeing if it reacts to it like how humans characters do, and when Pat does toss the money the dog suddenly starts rolling over and acting all happy, prompting the guys to start laughing hysterically.
  • The accents going overboard:
    Pat: (Bad Pirate/English accent) So what did you name your ship?
    Matt: (Ditto) Cuntdestroyer.
    Pat: ...that's a pretty good name.
    Matt: We're on a quest to destroy a certain thing.
    Pat: The English!
    Matt: What a bunch of cunts.
    Matt: Wait, aren't we English? I don't...
    Pat: It's not clear with this pirate accent.
  • "There are no sexual animals on this island." "(Giggling) Just Edward Kenway!"
  • The Hamburger of Eden returns.
  • Matt and Pat actually managed to make a Shout-Out to the cancelled Broken Pixels show. More specifically, they referenced the Virtual Hydlide episode:
    Pat: (Whiny nerd accent)MOM! THEY TOOK MY PIRATE BACKPACK!

Fighter Within
  • The numerous instances of standing still and repeatedly punching the opponent in the groin. Even more so during the multiplayer segment, with both Matt and Pat doing it to each other... with neither character model reacting at all.
  • Pat accidentally selecting the same character as Matt due to the Kinect being so finicky.
  • The two going through the character's profiles give a bevy of glorious lines.
    Matt: (describing one of the character's profiles) So because of the 2010 earthquake, she can now communicate with voodoo spirits.

The Walking Dead: Season 2
  • The title of this episode? "CLEMENTINE IS A BEAST."
  • At the beginning of the episode, we have a live-action shot of Matt and Pat, steeling themselves for the game and the eventual feels. They have done so by draping a blanket over their laps, gathering a couple boxes worth of tissues, and a tub of ice-cream. As they start the game, Pat's hand inches towards the ice-cream... Only for Matt to take it away from him with a completely deadpan expression.
  • During the recap, we have several of these, including, but not limited to:
    Matt: Remember when Ben got overpowered by cancer patients?!
  • During the bathroom check scene at the beginning, they immediately comment that the toilets are amazingly pristine in spite of the entire world going to hell.
    • Also from that scene, when Clem' is hiding in the stalls:
    Matt: Use Aiden!
  • When they get to the scene with Clem' having to relight the fire, they immediately focus on the animal carcass roasting over it:
    Matt: Look at that cat!
    Pat: That's fucked up.
    Matt: I can't tell what animal that is, except a cat.
    Pat: It looks like a bunny, maybe. With the ears cut off... And the skin taken off... And the organs cut out.
    Matt: "Don't worry honey, they're just sleeping. Upside down-"
    Both: "-And inside out!"
    • When they have the option to pick what to burn in the fire, they unanimously pick the drawing of Kenny and his family.
    Matt: How is that even a choice?!
    Pat: Fuck you people!
    Matt: I hope this makes them burn in Hell.
    Pat: Oh yeah, especially Duck!
  • When they get to the docks near the survivors cabin, they immediately dub it "Camp Crystal Lake", and suggest Telltale Games make a game of it.
    Pat: Use a rubber, or don't use a rubber? "Don't use a rubber," OH NO, JASON IS HERE!
  • When they come across the grave at the campsite:
    Matt: "Here lies Kenny. Nobody loved him."
    Pat: "Buried with his boat."
    Matt: "Here lies Walt Witman."
    Pat: Fuck you, Walt Witman! History's greatest monster!
  • Rebecca is almost immediately dubbed "New Kenny," and/or "Female Kenny."
  • "My stomach is just full of apple-juice and squirrels." Matt's glee in drinking boxed Apple Juice and thinking it will numb Clementine's pain as she sews her own wounds shut.
  • Matt and Pat's unabashed glee at asking Rebecca who the father of her baby is.
    Pat: Everyone else gets forgiven, but she's decided to be a huge fuckin' problem, so fuck her.
    Matt (to Rebecca): Guess what? I am a "Huge Problem." I'm the "problem-child!"
    Matt: Look at that Dante-shot!

Lego Marvel Super Heroes
  • The beginning, where Matt calls Woolie over so they can play Marvel. Woolie comes over with arcade stick in hand only to find that they're playing Lego Marvel.
    Woolie: Matt, FUCK YOU!
    • Also, while Matt's calling Woolie:
    Pat: Who are you talking to?
    Matt: Woolie.
    Pat: Why?
    • Woolie then admits that he would've been hyped to play the game had they not set him up, to which Matt and Pat reply:
    Pat: But that would've been way less fun.
    Matt: But lies though.
    Pat: Lies are great. I love lying.
  • When the start up the game, they immediately comment on the loading screen, which goes well until Ego, The Living Planet comes into the shot, at which point Matt loses it:
    Matt (upon seeing Ego): OH MY GOD!!!
    Pat: Fuck everything.
    Matt: It's the best superhero ever!
    • "Ego the Living Planet is my religion!"
    • They briefly confuse Ego with Mogo, the Green Lantern Planet.
  • Their ideas for a Samuel L. Jackson Lego play-set:
    Pat: He's finally been put into a medium in which he, you, can pretend he yells, and then the entire environment falls apart around him.
    Matt: The Samuel L. Jackson Lego playset comes with Shark.
    Woolie: And a little, mini-Bible which he can hold, he can click into his hand.
    Pat: And a chain with a white girl on it.
    Everyone bursts into laughter
    Matt: Or a tiny little wallet that says "bad motherfucker" on it!
    Woolie: No, he'd have a Lego head on a bigger body.
  • Pat saying that Sand-Man and Hydro-Man are essentially the same character.
  • This part in the beginning with Hulk and Iron-Man:
    Matt: Shouldn't Bruce Banner and Iron-Man be furiously making out right now?
    Pat: They really should.
    Matt (as Bruce Banner): "Iron-Man, come 'er!"
  • "I'm Uni-Beam-ing all over!"
  • During the last fight with Sand-Man, we get this:
    Pat: Thanks, Obama. I signed up for hope and change, not vaginal centipedes.
    Woolie: ... This started off as a Captain Hammer reference, I have no idea where the went.
  • Pat pointing out that it took so long for three of the smartest characters in Marvel to pour water on Sand-Man, without coming up with a better plan.
    Matt: Too bad Professor X and Mr. Fantastic couldn't lend their brain power.
  • All of the scene where they discuss Iron-Man's "Hottub Time."
  • When Loki and Dr. Doom are conspiring to retrieve the Cosmic Cube:
    Matt: The fangirls are already writing the fanfictions for DoomXLoki.
    Pat: "And then he took his mask off and had a horrible face and is like, "Let's make out.""
  • "Fuckin' WILLEM DAFOE!?"
  • Mr. Fantastic is a shapeshifter in this game, able to become bolt cutters, a screwdriver and a water pump. The Power Perversion Potential is too much for the best friends to handle.
    Woolie: It's such a creepy power!
    Matt (as Mr. Fantastic): "You have no idea the creepy things I've done to my wife! Who is invisible!"
    Woolie (continuing as Reed): "I can show you!" [...] At least in DC, Plastic-Man's a weirdo, so no one's too surprised by it.
  • During Mr. Fantastic and Captain America's chase of Dr. Octopus, they run by a hotel, which prompts this little bit about random pairings:
    Matt: I wanna go by this hotel and have, like , a really odd pairing who are boning in a window. Like, Rage and Shadowcat.
    Pat: Shadowcat and Shadowcat. (Beat) She can go inside-out!
    Matt: Shadowcat and Ego!
    Woolie: Shadowcat and Adam X the Xtreme.
    Pat: I'm noticing an obvious trend here.
    Matt: Rogue and Blob.
    Woolie: With Shadowcat watching... Inside the wall.
    Matt: And Colossus is watching her!
    All three bust up laughing.
  • Matt finally lets loose an AMERICA!! while running around as Captain America. He doesn't understand why Cap needs a parachute, while skydiving though.

Batman Arkham Origins
  • The episode's general theme is laden in Sequelitis. Matt & Pat call it "We need another Batman Game" and show a marquee of So Okay, It's Average bylines as they zoom in on the logo.
  • Matt tries to read the infamous "Blind Idiot" Translation of a bootleg Batman Begins DVD case, only to break out into laughter. Especially when he learns Bruce Wayne was inspired to fight justice as Spiderman.
    • And his rogues gallery includes Dr. Jackstraw, the abnormal drug dealer.
  • The thumbnail images are Batman from Batman: The Animated Series looking especially depressed and sad.

  • Pat once again accidentally calling the original Xbox the Xbox One.
  • Their reaction to a giant rat enemy while in the sewer.
    • The rat is especially bizarre because it has no movement animations and clips into everything.
  • The Best Friends spotting an enemy on a ledge glitching and freaking out, flailing their arms. Matt actually zooms in on it.
  • When Matt shoots an oil barrel, he somehow dies despite the explosion being small and him being about 10 feet away.
  • Matt telling Robocop he's causing a shortage of baby-food, to which Robocop replies that Detroit can afford to lose children.
  • The ending, in which Robocop breaks into Matt's apartment to snap the game disc in half.
  • Pat shouting for Robocop to "ARREST THE LAW!"

Donkey Kong Country: Tropical Freeze
  • In the live action segments, Matt forces Pat, Woolie, and Liam to keep eating bananas as part of the season finale.
  • After getting to the end of a tough level, Matt says that there's a secret past the goal. Unlike last time, there's actually something there.

    Funtime Adventures 
Funtime Adventures! Episode 1: Escort Service

Funtime Adventures! Episode 2: Draw or Die
  • The references to My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic that appear as the logo of the can Pat drinks from (It's the Cutie Mark of Rainbow Dash) and later Matt with an explorer outfit and the Daring Do and the Sapphire Stone book under his arm.
  • Matt explaning to Pat that the cover of Ninja Gaiden depicts Ryu as a giant ninja towering above the buildings he destroyed and looking to kill him. Pat starts to look scared... Until he laughs it off as "It's so dumb!".
    • Matt calls the main character "Ryu Toyota Hyundai Toshiba-Kun".
  • The ending of Double Dragon 2 goes like this:
    Billy: Oh shit, [Mirian]'s dead. What are we going to do?
    Jimmy: Don't worry bro! Let's use the magic of friendship to bring her back!
    Billy: "......" What the fuck are you talking abo...
    (Kirby appears and uses a magic wand to launch a star, succesfully resurrecting her)
    Mirian: Billy, I'm alive!
    Billy: WTF???

Funtime Adventures! Episode 3: First Person Stupidity
  • The ridiculously long sequence of the duo opening the door and what's behind it. It's Duke Nukem Forever.
  • Pat's high pitched screaming in the beginning of the video.
  • Pat finds the monsters of DOOM adorable!
    Pat: Oh man, look! It's a pinky! Pinkies are just goddamn adorable!
    (The camera zooms in on it's face, surrounded by sparkles as it's head gets shot off. Then it cuts back to Pat's ugu face while he holds a shotgun)
    Matt: *with a worried look* ...Wait, where'd you get that...?

Funtime Adventures! Episode 4: KOMBAT TIME!
  • Pat's amazing Fan Boy Squee when Reptile shows up.
    Matt: Oh man, here we go.
    • Later, after Reptile saves them both:
    Pat: *stares at Reptile with uguu~ face*
    Reptile: Wh-What?
    Reptile: *punches Pat in the face*

Funtime Adventures! Episode 5: The Feel of Action Games
  • At the start of the episode, Pat is trying to break through a door since there aren't any enemies to kill or apparent puzzles to solve. Matt then wanders around, bored, and finds Ebony and Ivory sitting in an obvious area off to the side. This ends up triggering the enemies and they immediately surround Pat, forcing him to fight them off while Matt screws around making pew-pew noises.

Miscellaneous And Quick Looks

    Super Best Friends Brawl 
Super Best Friends Brawl—WWF No Mercy
  • Matt, Pat, and Woolie (Matt's co-host on Fighterpedia) play an N64 WWF game... with only created characters. Woolie plays as Zubaz (a rejected Street Fighter character and running gag for Fighterpedia), Matt plays as The Shockmaster (a Call Back to their WWE All Stars video), and Pat plays as Reptile... or at least as close a fascimile as he could make.

Super Best Friends Brawl—Super Smash Bros
  • Woolie versus Matt on clothing:
    Woolie: (as Kirby) Why is the gorilla even wearing a tie?
  • "Show me the Sex Kick."
    • "Oh 'cause it's so sex.
  • Their repeated allegations that Smash Bros isn't really a fighting game, which eventually morphs into the idea that Smash Bros isn't a video game, period.
  • "Maybe the item was the courage in all of us. *cue a clip from Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann*"
  • As Matt knocks Woolie, playing as Samus, out of the ring: "Women can't vote! Get outta here!"
  • Pat references Solid Snake: "He's the guy with the full carton of cigarettes in his stomach right now."
  • Matt mentions a mech character he likes so much that he'd like to have sex with it, which of course causes them to start making references to Skeet Fighter.
    Matt: I like your rail gun so good, gurl.
  • Pat wins one of the matches and starts a paraphrased version of Loki's speech from The Avengers when he ordered the normal people to bow before him.
  • "Look at Snake. Stupid sexy ass."
  • They discuss the idea that Metal Gear Rex and Samus Aran's suit have openable panels designed to have sex through. Cue onscreen pictures pointing out the locations of said panels.
  • Pat's completely deadpan responses to Woolie's gloating:
    Woolie (as Samus): You charged that shit up, and I sent it home!
    Woolie: Do you see these guns!?
    Pat: You're playing a video game!

Super Best Friends Brawl—Worms 2: Armageddon

Super Best Friends Brawl—Super Bomberman 5
  • During a match, Woolie gets trapped while riding the minecart. He proceeds to not tell anyone and deny ever getting stuck after Pat notices that Woolie is stuck.
  • During one of the matches, in apropos of nothing, Matt decides to parrot out a line from Ke$ha's "We Are Who We Are"— specifically "Don't mess with us; got Jesus on my neck-a-lace". Pat proceeds to laugh so hard that his Bomberman dies almost instantly.

Super Best Friends Brawl—Mario Party 9
  • After spending pretty much the entire game in last place, Woolie jumps to first after taking half of Matt and Pat's mini-stars in a Bowser challenge. Between that and several bonuses, he ends up crowned the Superstar. Matt and Pat take it very well.
    Pat: I was robbed of this victory! I would like to appeal this to the Mario Party committee! I have allegations of doping and jury-rigging!

Super Best Friends Brawl—Anarchy Reigns
  • In an epic display of sore loserdom, after Pat has won the match, the last couple seconds of the video are a picture of him in a bicycle helmet with the heading "Even the biggest retards can be winners!"
  • The ending of the last fight is pretty funny too. Matt and Woolie have teamed up to prevent Pat from making a clean sweep of all 4 rounds. The CPU ends up winning the round, but the rules of scoring say that the player in second will take the point for the round, currently Matt, who is celebrating and gloating at this. After each fight, the game gives out bonus points based on various stats during the round, most of which keep going to Pat, leading to this...
    Matt: "Anyway, we finally stopped him."
    Pat: (As he overtakes Matt) "Hey Matt."
    Matt: "What?"
    Pat: "Check the score."
    Matt: "Nooooo."
    Woolie: "Wait, what the fuck?"
  • The character select screen introduced in this video was rather hilarious; all of the fighters (Matt, Woolie, and Pat excepted) being callbacks to prior videos, including a nightmare Basking Shark, Zubaz, and the Mummy Lobster.
  • The post-match screen usually displays the standings of each person, showing how many games they won. However, after Pat wins the third match in a row (out of the four needed to claim victory), it simply says "FUCK".
  • Woolie strikes a few poses as Bayonetta, charges up a rushing attack, and then proceeds to completely miss Pat and go flying off the stage.

Super Best Friends Brawl—Mario Kart
  • Pat's pre-Brawl bio claims that he won the previous game "by the skin of his teeth".
  • During the Rainbow Road race, Pat starts violently losing his shit over the chain chomps on the track.
    • He also never once says their actual name, always calling them chomp chomps. Matt and Woolie never correct him because they find his rage too amusing.
  • Woolie mentions two other friends by name.
    Pat: God dammit, don't say people's real names! [scattered chuckling] You fuckin' idiot!
    Woolie: Like James Small?
    Pat: Yeah, like James Small! [laughter] James Small isn't a person!
    [cut to "actual footage of James Small being led off-stage"]
  • The group then switches over to Double Dash and quickly become befuddled over the game's nigh-incomprehensible mechanics. It gets to the point that Woolie finds himself in first place, and has no goddamned idea how he did it.
    Woolie: Why Am I first!?
    Pat:*Matt laughs*That's how we know!
    Matt: That's the real question!
    woolie: I did nothing to earn this!
  • During the Battle Game, which Pat loses first:
    Pat: I guess I'll just start jerkin' off.
    Matt: [laughing] You were gonna do that regardless of the outcome, be real!
    Pat: Hand me that Dante figurine.
  • At the end, Matt waxes poetic:
    Matt: I dunno. Did I win? What is winning?
    Woolie: ...when you really think about it.
    Matt: But we keep fighting! To find that answer!
    Pat: OH GOD SHU— *cut to the end*

Super Best Friends Brawl—Power Stone 2
  • The match suffers not one but two delays from technical difficulties.
  • Pat continually complains about never playing Power Stone before, Woolie and Matt take this to full advantage.
  • After Matt wins the Brawl he thanks thanks the viewers for coming out and watching them while the other 2 contenders are booing. He then proceeds to show that he has the most wins out of all the brawls in the aftermath.
  • Matt and Woolie repeatedly saying "Oh no!" like the announcer does when someone loses a Power Stone.
  • Pat's Salty Johns! They'll make you say "I don't know how to play the video game!"

Super Best Friends Brawl—Perfect Dark
  • The intrusive X-Box pop-ups.
  • Regular jabbing at Ken Lobb and the game's Klobb Prop Recycling.
  • Pat accidentally suicides by stepping on his own proximity-mode Dragon.
  • The realization in the first round that they didn't set any win conditions.
  • Some of the quotes from the first match.
    Matt: I've got no weapons, it just gave me bullets!
  • Everybody getting lost in the dark and twisted Temple stage.
    Matt: This game is dark and (Melisandre clip of "full of terrors").
    Pat: I mean, you could say it's only- it's almost perfectly dark.
  • "When Woolie is nervous, he crouches, therefore making other people nervous."
  • Pat getting a little too giddy during the final match.
  • The Slowest-Moving Rocket Ever

Super Best Friends Brawl—Def Jam: Fight for NY
  • Right at the beggining:
    Woolie: Black People: The Game! Get ready!
  • Matt reveals that he actually knew obscure white rapper "Bless" as a teenager as both went to the same high school and took a drama class together. He reveals Bless was actually a very lazy student who never came to class and Matt had to play all of his parts for him in Drama, giving Matt a great score in the class, while Bless acted like an entitled douche expecting a grade at all at the end of the semester. As a result of Bless now fading to obscurity and Matt going on to become something of a YouTube celebrity (minus the huge ego) Matt is the one who got the last laugh.
    • On a somewhat meta sense, after the episode was posted a bunch of fans started to edit Bless' Wikipedia article by saying Bless had a new single coming soon called "Matt and the Salty Boyz."
  • In the first match, this happens:
    (Pat just preforms a sick move on Woolie, who both happen to be wearing all black)
    Matt: He's gonna tap! Ice-T's gonna tap!
    Pat: No, I did the move Matt.
    Matt: Oh. Oh, sorry. I couldn't tell because he was just a mass of blackness.
    Matt: I mean their clothes! Their clothes!

    The outtake videos 
  • Mortal Kombat
    • The continuation of the Walken!Smoke impression.
    Matt: These ninjas... they're everywhere!
    Matt: I just lost the match!
    • "I love my tits slathered in crimson!"
  • Heavy Rain
    • Matt and Pat get a little drawn to the bird in Ethan's house.
    Matt: Wow, they spent way too much time making that bird.
    Pat: That bird is, like, a major plot point. (beat) That bird's the killer!
  • Duke Nukem Forever
    • When the twins in Duke's apartment walk away, the animation is so bad that the two can't hold in their laughter.
    Pat: 3DRealms can't animate for SHIT!
  • Man vs Wild: The Game
    • Matt getting water from a tree
    Matt: I asked the tree for some water and I got some.
    Pat: Bear Grylls is not some mystical shaman!
    Matt: Oh really? Because he drinks his piss!
    "If you see a lion and this bush, jump into the lion."
    Pat: (Pat has just made Bear zipline down a slope and he's noticed the parachute that he landed in, which is colored blue white and red) look there's the French flag over there! I'm in France!
    Matt: (immediately) America.
    Pat: No, that's's the...Fr-
    Matt: Right?
    Pat: No!
    • Pat failing utterly at making traps, particularly his first attempt:
    Matt: (Pat grabs onto a branch and it randomly breaks) No, this is completely useless and you just broke it!
    Pat: (cracks up for a bit) What the hell?!
    • Matt finding the way to make Bear drink his own piss.
    (Bear Grylls is making some sort of motion, his back to the camera)
    Matt: What...what?
    Pat: Thanks.
    Matt: I thought he was peeing in something.
    Pat: Me too.
    Matt: (Bear finishes doing whatever he was doing) What was that? (Matt opens his rucksack then sees that his snakeskin canteen is now full. The info says "This canteen is filled with my urine". After a bit, Pat begins laughing hysterically) ...I found it.
  • The Deus Ex RoboCop easter egg video:
    Pat: [notices that one of the cops is called "Detective Alex Murphy"] But THAT'S RoboCop!
    Matt: I KNOW!
    Murphy: Nice digs! Hey, you ever heard of this 80s movie? Anyone ever tell you you got that "movie star" look about you?
    Pat: Why is RoboCop telling you that you're RoboCop?
    Cop: Did we just go into a time warp or something?
    Matt: I THINK WE DID!

  • LA Noire
    • This little bit:
    Pat: It felt like butterflies caressing my naked body! (beat) ...What the fuck am I talking about?
    Matt: (timidly) I don't know...I didn't say anything 'cause I was worried you might've gone nuts.
    • Matt and Pat discussing the term "gams".

  • Punch-Out!!
    Matt: He's using the combined power of Jim Carrey, Michael J. Fox and Pamela Anderson!

    Best Friends Beat Em' Ups 
Dungeons & Dragons Shadow Over Mystara
  • Woolie swooping in with magic to Kill Steal every boss before anyone else can.
  • Pat, sterling cleric that he is, trying to use all of his heals on himself and getting angry when Matt "steals" one.
  • The entire rafting segment.
  • Liam politely thanking Pat for healing him and Pat calmly saying you're welcome, followed by an uncomfortable Beat before everyone talks about how weird that was.
  • All the final boss the team try to unleash a Team Special Move on the final boss... And get killed again and again.

Aliens Vs Predator
  • They talk about how they liked the game above and this comes up:
    Matt: It had a really good ending, too.
    Pat: Where Matt is dead, that is my favorite ending.
    Matt: It is the best ending.
  • In the end:
    Woolie: Now Tina, Lin and Jerry are all in a love triangle like Sasuke, Naruto and Sakura.
    Pat: OH, SHUT UP!

Dragon's Crown
  • Throughout the playing, Liam trolls everyone super-hard, making them quite butthurt.
  • The disastrous fight against the red dragon that began right off due to Liam's trolling.
    Woolie: LIAM, YOU SHIT!
  • As the four run across a George Kamitami styled mermaid, they react with hesitation, but make a stunning realization about the Mermaid Problem:
    Matt: This game is innovative, because it stops the debate!
  • Pat's nonstop, goofy references to twerkin'.
    Pat:: I'm working! I'm working on twerkin'.
    Matt:: Pat's new album.
    Pat:: Who wants to twerk with gingers? (Weakly) It's not against the law anymore. I'm dead.
  • When they run into the Hobgoblin Chef.
    Matt & Liam: Pat's mom?
    Woolie: What's she doing here?
    Pat: ... She's really nice to you guys! That's the worst part!
    Liam: I've never met her!
    Matt: She was nice to me last night.
    Pat: Fuck you! Fuck! You! That is not appropriate!
Pat:: Yo, I got a 40 of Crack!

    Shitstorm of Scariness & Shitstorm 2: The Shittening 
Matt and Pat's Shitstorm of Scariness
  • The Special Effects Failure during jump scares in Ju On: the Grudge, one of which they point out looks a lot like Toasty.
  • They practically spend all of Calling wandering around a school, occasionally freaking out at shadows but not really running into anything intentionally scary - until it turns out they just forgot to look through a window, at which point they receive a Jump Scare and the video ends.
  • In Condemned, shortly after receiving instructions on the taser, Pat relates a story about how he was hit with a stungun in school by a kid who didn't like him. He ends it with "It hurt alot. Hey kids, don't get hit with stunguns or tasers. They hurt like crazy! I had a rough time!".
    • Plus, their excitement at finding some and using some of the more powerful weapons.
  • The huge Jump Scare midway through Call Of Cthulhu: Dark Corners Of The Earth followed by several minutes of panicked breathing and exasperated wondering about how a guard can scare them so much when all he ever does is make them leave the area.
  • In Amy, Matt is mocking a character wtih a stereotypical New York accent, when he mentions the restaurant chain Olive Garden. Pat immediately flips out, saying that he knew Matt was going to bring up Olive Garden.
  • They often make fun of the shadows in Man Hunt due to how obvious they are as well as how easily they fool their enemies.
  • Encounters with the creatures in Candles are not so much Pat freaking out, as much as Pat and the monsters awkwardly staring at each other.
    Pat: Uh... hey...
    • Pat tempts fate by getting close to a closed door while Matt is telling him to stay away from it, only for the imp on the other side to clip through and KO him.
    Pat: WOAH! I was gonna make a joke about sticking my dick through the door.
    Matt: Well, he grabbed it!
  • Matt and Pat encounter Suzie in Killer7.
    Matt and Pat: *beat*
  • Pat spends the entire time playing Resident Evil Remake gushing about how awesome it is.
    Pat: Look at this FMV! Look at the blades of grass!
    • Also, there's this line about Jill and the game's impressive graphics:
    Pat: No, it's not that she's hot, it's that she so well 3D-modeled, that she's hot.
    • Again about the graphics:
    Matt: I remember pausing to check if there jiggle physics on...Chris!
    Pat: There are no jiggle physics in this game.
    • Matt's incredibly deadpan story of how he got his copy of R Emake.
  • In F.E.A.R. 2, after waking up in a hospital after the ghost nuke went off, running around to find the place devoid of life and looking like a war zone, and seeing a woman shot to death, they come across a friendly face.
    Woman: Sergeant Becket! Thank God you're okay! I'm sure you have a lot of questions.
    Pat: Yeah, like "What the fuck?!"
    Matt: WAH! JEEZ!
    Pat: *confused* What?
    Matt: I hate this cleaning solution, it's the worst.
    *fires a single round that plips the bottle off the cart*
  • While playing Silent Hill 3, Matt and Pat discuss what would happen if Kojima got hold of the series. They come to the conclusion that the Terminator would appear in the game.
    • Also:
    Matt: If I was a girl in a haunted amusement park, I would not be a girl in a haunted * stumbling over his words* music park.
    Pat: A music park?
    • Pat's story of how he and his friend were scared while walking in the fog.
  • During Dead Space, after watching a Necromorph get crushed by a closing elevator door, Pat lampshades how that door was very useful for him, but in the context of the Dead Space universe, people have got to die all the time in elevator accidents.
  • When playing System Shock 2:
    Pat: Shit's poppin' off in this System Shock world, now I'm gonna be a System Shock girl.
  • When the two come across a door sealed by "strong power" in Fatal Frame 3:

Shitstorm 2: The Shittening:
  • At the end of Anna, Pat is so freaked out he actually voluntary quits the game.
  • Their inability to understand the Japanese during Night Of The Sacrifice.
    • At the end of video, they discuss how creepy abandoned tunnels are and who often dies first horror films. Then right after they turn around to see a mannequin right behind them, prompting them to lose their shit.
  • Dreadout: The entire sequence with the giant ghost monster, which Pat can't stand being around long enough to solve the puzzle.
    • At one point Pat mistakes a scare as a bug, only to be quickly proven wrong.
  • Curse: The Eye of Isis: A ninja fires a crossbow bolt at the protagonist, hitting a nearby pillar. There's a note attached: NEXT TIME, I WON'T MISS. Matt is in hysterics, Pat is dead silent.
  • Faced with endless locked doors in Cold Fear, Pat drinks his way through an entire wine cooler.
  • Their reactions to all of the strangeness in Rule of Rose.
    • Their collective reaction to the Filth Room.
    • They also discuss why Pat brings up the "romantic big rubber fist" every so often.
    Matt: Butterflies don't take too kindly to fisting...
  • After all the Your Mom jokes Matt has leveled at Pat, Pat finally gets to answer during the episode of The X-Files: Resist or Serve.
  • Pat actually conceding that Matt's inability to navigate a game is not to blame - for once - whilst they play Dino Crisis 3.
  • The arrival of a ridiculously fast Jason cutting through the lake water as Matt attempts to row during their Friday the 13th installment; Climaxes brilliantly when Matt loses his last character and Jason decides to add insult to injury by streaking across the water three times.
  • Their confusion with the portuguese language when playing Insanidade and Pesadelo. It starts with them mistaking it for spanish and it ends with them becoming found of the word "jogo". Specially funny if you are a native portuguese speaker and had to face english games before learning the language.
    • However, they are able to guess what some of it means, such as this priceless moment from Pesadelo:
    (Upon opening a door, the monster dashes by, a message appears, and a 7 minute timer begins.)
    "Pat": Now there's a timer?
    "Matt": Exploda!?
    "Pat": I understand that!
  • Each game seems to vary in how scary they are but each video ups the ante how strange they can get. It gets to a point where either Matt or Pat will exclaim that the game they are playing is the strangest one they've played so far.
  • When all four of them decide to play Luigi's Mansion, Liam pulls off a shy guy's mask, this causes an... odd conversation to result.
    Matt: "You can't do that, that's like ripping off a goomba's face and it's Princess Peach on the inside."
    Pat: "No, it's like ripping off a Goomba's face and it's Princess Peach's butt."
    (A few seconds of Liam and Woolie talking about something else pass)
    Pat: *Giggling uncontrollably* "I can't stop thinking about pulling a goomba's face off and Princess Peach's *Dissolves into laughter*"
    *Pat absolutely loses it*
  • Pat then mixes this with the Mega Man cartoon, where now Luigi rips off a Goomba's face and sees Gutsman's Ass.
  • Also during the Luigi's Mansion episode, Liam mentions something about Platinum developing Persona 5. Pat's fangasm is immodest and hilarious.
  • Rise Of Nightmares sees Matt cheerfully batting a skull back and forth in his character's hands, while talking about the game Mr Bones, ignoring Pat's enraged demands that he continue the game.

  • Playing the horrible Showdown: Legends of Wrestling, Ted DiBiase demonstrates how to deal with a charging Bam Bam Bigelow.
  • The guys take turns at "Hulk Hogan's Main Event," and when Woolie switches with Pat the Kinect freaks out because Pat is nearly a foot shorter than him. The result is the game repeatedly doing the same move while Pat stands completely motionless.
    • The gang recording their own taunts for the wrestler
    Game Question:Where does your drive for wrestling come from?
    Matt: Matt hates black people!
    Woolie: Well there you go.
    Pat: He hates 'em!
  • Courtesy of Rumble Roses XX: Pre-Crisis Shingeki no Avril.
  • The high-octane brawling action in Wrestlemania XIX, such as Matt gently rolling/kneading a security guard along the floor for a while, Goldust's unbeatable fighting style of sliding up and down on a pole doing fussy little kicks (until another security guard slides down the pole from above and knocks him and his target over), and in the final three-way match, Pat and Woolie deciding to just lie on the floor and not get up from sheer boredom.
  • While playing an Ultimate X FFA match in "TNA impact", they have no idea how to actual grab onto the ropes above the ring, which culminates in all 3 of them standing on a turnbuckle twisting left and right.
    • Later in the same match, Woolie is trying to grab the x(and failing the QTE repeatedly), while Pat tries to grab him from below, and Matt tries to shimmy over to Woolie and kick him down. There's only a split second chance between Woolie failing and trying again that Pat can grab him, which leads to him jumping up and down repeatedly while waving his arms. Meanwhile Matt keeps forgetting to target Woolie, and every time he reaches him, ends up letting go of the rope to elbow drop (an increasing angry) Pat instead.
    Pat: KICK HIM!
    Matt: I'm not sure who my focus in on *jumps onto Pat*
  • The complete and total heel turn at the end of WWF Smackdown 2: Know Your Role! Even better since there was no reason for this at all except than Woolie thought it might be funny.
  • Zubaz the Luchadore
  • The glorious crescendo of Wrestlemania 21.
    • Not only the glitch itself, but the fact that the game considers the glitch to be the highlight of the match in the replay.
  • Wooliemania, just, Wooliemania
  • The discussion which somehow ranges from how awesome Shane McMahon was during the time when he was wrestling the likes of the Big Show despite not being a professional athlete at all, to the helpless laughter of all three of them as their mockery of Vince McMahon continues to the point where they talk about him unveiling his penis as part of his continued ploys against Stone-Cold, in Wrestlemania X8.
    • This, and the utter confusion over the naming schemes of the Wrestlemania shows since 2000.
  • The entirety of their WCW Mayhem video, a game so unthinkably appalling they had to switch games just to preserve their sanity.

     Specials and Series 
Silent Hill: Shattered Memories
  • Pat telling Matt to just look at the doctor while Matt's eyesight in the game wanders to a another area.
  • Matt's nonchalance toward Cheryl's disappearance.
    Pat: You'd be upset if you lost your kids!
    Matt: I, if I find her, is it the end of the g- like...
    Pat: What, you wan- you want POINTS for finding your children?
    Matt: ...Yeah, like *gems*, or something...
    Pat: What is-what the fuck is wrong with you?
  • Matt taking way too long with the coloring, causing Pat to go mad with anger.
    • Made even funnier when Pat comes back later to apologize to Matt for getting angry...only to find he's still doing it, driving him into another sputtering rage.
  • They spend a moment making fun of Canada, which is hilarious considering that they're actually Canadian.

Matt and Woolie's Old-School Playthroughs
  • During the last episode of Matt and Woolie's Old-School Playthrough of Double Dragon: Neon, just how pumped Woolie was throughout the entire episode. Especially when Billy and Jimmy go through Marian's love portal to chase down Skullmaggeddon and emerge as robots, the fight with Giga Skullmaggeddon and his cinematic One-Hit KO move, Marian's punch to Skullmaggeddon's balls at the bottom of his fall to his death while singing the ending credits, and the last fight between Robot Billy and Robot Jimmy for Marian's affections.
  • Rising Superstar Liam trolls the SA-X.
    Matt: That was the epitome of the word "shenanigans."

Matt's Sexy Bond-A-Thon
  • The Plague Of Gripes intro sequence, parodying the standard Bond opening POV shot, with Matt walking into view, dropping his gun, and hopping out of view after it discharges into his foot.

  • The start of the Scrublords of a very bad licensed Transformers Beast Wars game, which initially impresses that Matt and Woolie are going to play Persona 4 Arena... until Matt sees Woolie combo juggle the AI to death without letting it hit the ground when he was doing his "button check", at which point he kind of sputters before it jumpcuts to the main video.
  • The intermission announcements in the first half of the Scrublord series, which range from announcements based on recent comments by Matt or Woolie such as the Ronin Warriors IOS fighting game kickstarter or the "Kickstarter to fund the Ronin Warriors Kickstarter", to a live feed of the action on the Scublords tournament floor...which is just a deserted parking lot
  • The live-action segments of the XMen Next Dimension episode, where Woolie leads a increasingly terrified Matt into a Silent Hill-esque dimly lit building, apparently in search of the brackets for the Scrublord tournaments. It culminates in both of them being attacked by a possessed shopping trolley after Woolie picks up an envelope. Back at Woolie's apartment, Matt decides he's no longer interested in the tournament. Woolie reveals the entire trip was just to fetch his mail.
    • Most of the live action segments really, with Woolie trying to get Matt hyped for a tournament that needs a blood sample to enter and makes announcements via a blood-smeared message on your front door.
  • The Divekick Scrublords Season Finale has a great ending. After an extremely close match, Pat is the victor. Cue a shot of said victor leaping into the air shouting "YEAH!" Also, we see the ultimate destination of the three losers of the tournament... THE SHAMECAR.

Ride to Hell: Retribution
  • The end of the video, where Matt does nothing but powerslide until the bike explodes and the boys break down in hysterics.
  • Pat describes a pivotal scene in Attack on Titan
    This little kid like viciously murders three grown men and his dads like "what the fuck are you doing?" and he's like "I took care of some filthy animals that looked like humans." He kills like a bunch of, rapers, with a knife and he's really hype about it. And his dad's like "whoa," and he's like "yeah, I know right?," and the cops are like "what?" And then they live happily ever after. And then the girl became Kamen Rider

Super Best Friends Play: Shadow the Hedgehog
  • A stunning, absolutely hysterical case of irony strikes with the video's end; After forty-plus minutes of Matt's incessant wailing about how terrible the game is, and Woolie and Liam vainly attempting to justify how hype the game was when they were teenagers, the Gamecube they're using to play the game joins Matt's protests by giving up the ghost and letting out a high-pitched wail as it crashes, thus bringing to an end the Rising Superstar's claims that they could make it a full playthrough.
    • Made even more hilarious when they do a part two to finish the run, and Matt spends every second of it insulting the game and hoping it will crash whenever they die. Unfortunately for him, the Rising Superstar does indeed finish the playthrough, and he and Woolie force Matt to watch the credits, under the pretense of their being a hidden cutscene after them. Halfway through them, the game spares Matt the disappointment (and provide a perfect CMOF ending to the run.)
    "The Game Disc could not be read. Please read the Nintendo Gamecube Instruction Booklet for more information."
  • Woolie emphasizes every time a selection on the GUI is made, because the gunshots used for the GUI sounded gansta when Woolie was young.
    BLAOW, BLAOW, Bullet Clip!

Super Best Friends Play: Ducktales Remastered
  • Woolie's insistence to sing through the entire Ducktales theme over the title screen, with Matt continuously asking if they can start actually playing the game. Woolie just sings over his pleas.
  • The jokes about Scrooge's cane within the game.
    Woolie: Scrooge's cane is like Thor's hammer. It's like Mjölnir. I want footage of Hulk trying to pick up Scrooge's cane. And just unable to do it.
    Matt: This is the sickest cane in the world! Six pogo jumps: more than enough to kill anything that moves!

Best Friends Play Spawn Armageddon

Best Friends Play Biker Mice from Mars

Sonic Spindash Quicklooks
  • Sonic Unleashed:
    • Comparing the "whoo!" Sonic says every time he dashes to that of Ric Flair.
    • Matt complains loudly about the Werehog scenes, because they swap out the traditional Sonic gameplay for poorly designed beat-em-up. After a flying segment, he bets that the next scene will have the moon rise and Sonic become a Werehog before they can have a running level. It doesn't, instead they wander around a town for ten minutes talking to NPCs. After finally beating it, they move to the next level - and Sonic is now the Werehog again. Matt just bellows FUCK! loud enough to make people complain that they jumped in the comments. 31:48.

Deception: Blood Ties
  • Any time Liam sabotaged or was caught in his own traps. Highlights include him triggering the rake trap he was standing on, activating an organ pipe drop too soon thus nullifying his current trap layout, and walking under and activating a guillotine while luring enemies into a different trap.
  • Pat gets angry at Liam's screw-ups and begins calling him Matt out of habit.
  • The ending, in which the two put a woman through an elaborate series of traps which involves her stepping on a rake, then stumbling towards a springboard which launches her into an electric chair, which shoots her up in midair while simultaneously being struck by a Swinging Axe. Then they perform it again right after she hits the ground and gets up. And immediately after getting up from THAT she is struck by the Swingng Axe and right back into the Electric Chair for the third time. The two exclaiming how stupid the whole thing is and outright losing themselves in laughter at the final part really seals it.

Pat Stares at Mercenary Kings
  • The video itself is 30 minutes of Pat playing Mercenary Kings by himself, with no audio whatsoever other than his own commentary. The lack of game noise and Pat's awkwardness trying to do a video by himself is just So Unfunny It's Funny.

  • As Pat discovers a bounty of light-related items such as flares and gasoline, Matt advises him to use light as a weapon against the nocturnal enemies 'like Alan Wake'. This being an early build, however, enemy damage isn't implemented yet. The video ends with Pat being pursued across the desert by a faceless monster, throwing his collection of flashbangs at it and dousing it with gasoline to no effect, until eventually he is hurling handfuls of lit matches at its face while shrieking 'Why Won't You Die?'.

Best Friends Play 187 RIDE OR DIE
  • Woolie's reactions to the game's scattershot use of gangsta slang.
    Matt: [reading the victory text and laughing] "Buck, you getting crunk out in these streets…"
    Woolie: That's not getting crunk! This has nothing to do with crunk!
  • Their idea to get "those PewDiePie numbers" is to approach random people in the street. Their discription of their own channel is amazing.
    Matt: Yo, you gotta check out our channel, son! We got this crazy fucking ginger bitch! J-Just going crazy all the time! We got t-this little girl/boy who loves animes! (...) We got this big stupid idiot with his damn Punisher hat, thinks he knows everything but he know nothing!
    Woolie: Check out The Switcher, how do ya spell that?
    Matt: Yo we got this black guy that likes Muse, man! That's crazy!
    Woolie: *Chuckles* ... The fuck is up with that shit!?

Godzilla Week
  • In Day 5, Matt, Pat, Liam and Woolie all play Godzilla Unleashed in a few four-player brawls. The very first one has Matt, Woolie and Liam playing Jet Jaguars while Pat plays as Biollante, setting the monsters to tiny. Almost immediately, Liam, Matt and Woolie decide to gang up on Pat, thus creating the scene of several tiny Jet Jaguars running around and kicking the stuffing out of a much larger, though still tiny and very slow Biollante.
    Pat: Don't gang up on me you assholes!
    Matt: But you're evil, though!
    Pat: You guys are such dicks.
    Matt: But we're like, the Earth Defenders, though. And you're like, a horrible mutant.
    Woolie: EDF!
    Matt, Liam, Woolie: [Chanting simultaneously while beating the crap out of Pat] E-D-F! E-D-F! E-D-F!
    Pat: Fuck you all!
  • Day 1 has Scott Steiner narrating a fight between Godzilla vs King Ghidorah and Mothra. There is something wrong with you, on a cellular level, if it isn't the GREATEST THING EVER.

Friday Night Fisticuffs
  • During the Tekken Tag Tournament 2 video, a heated argument arises over whether this game or Tekken 3 was the best Tekken between Matt and Woolie. Woolie emphatically holds that TTT2 is the better game. The game freezes while he makes his argument.
  • In the TMNT & Gundam Wing video, the entire demonstration of the final boss of the game Karai, in TMNT; from destroying the other not-as-broken secret character Rat King to the fight between two Karais. Pat's utter bewilderment and Matt, Woolie and Liam's uproarious laughter make the entire segment.
    Woolie: This is Divekick!

    Liam: She has like 20 magic pixels, what the hell!?

    Matt: Please look forward to TMNT: Tournament Fighters on the main stage at EVO.
    Pat: If I was friends with a kid and went over to their place and they always had the codes unlocked to play as these characters, I wouldn't be their friend anymore.
    Matt: Yeah, I bet you wouldn't.
    Pat: It's fuckin' bullshit.
  • The Injustice: Gods Among Us video. During one of Pat and Woolie's fights, Woolie picks Zod...and then goes with the Man of Steel skin. His scream of "I WILL FIND HIM!" is the icing on the cake.
    • At one point, Matt mentions Black Bolt. Pat confusedly asks who Black Bolt is. Matt enthusiastically delcares Black Bolt to be "The best character in anything, ever!"

Super Best Friends VS: Dark Souls II
  • The constant transitions back and forth of Woolie and Pat doing great and having fun to Matt and Liam dying repeatedly and making close to no progress.
  • Matt predicts which class Woolie will pick, leading to a fantastic Description Cut
    Matt: Woolie's taking a fuckin' mage to shoot bullshit and ruin the game.
    Liam: And he's gonna play as his Dragon Lance fuckin' favourite Waif, what's his name again?
    [Cut to Woolie's recording, he's selected Sorceror]
    Woolie: I'm going this way! No Sword 'N Board for me.
    [Cut back to Matt and Liam]
    Liam: Maybe you should go with green?
    Matt: Green is the lamest colour! Who would ever make their created character green?
    [Back to Woolie, who's made his character's robes and hair green]
    Woolie: I like the look of this guy!
  • At the end of the Epilogue, Pat gets stepped on by the first boss, and he and Liam admit with equal part lamentation and admiration that Woolie, who had never played any of the Souls games before, was now better than them, having beaten the Last Giant boss solo on his first try while they used two summons and died.
  • In the first couple minutes of the Epilogue, we see part of the reason Matt was doing so bad: because he missed a certain NPC, he went up to boss of the first dungeon without leveling up or getting his Estus Flask. Matt, who'd never played a game in the series before, basically tried a SL 1 run, one of the series hardest Self Imposed Challenges entirely by accident.
  • "Praise the sun!"
  • Pat's advice to Woolie as he hides in a hole too small for the first monster he meets to go through, letting him shoot it to death with magic. "Cheat! The monster is tougher than you, so fucking cheeeaaat!"

The Amazing Superfriends!
  • Pat hammering the quick turn button to make the camera change angles rapidly, the camera shooting through the scenery to make it to the next cutscene, the camera having no one to focus on and just settling on an empty hallway. Really just the game's awful camera in general.
    • In one instance, the camera gets stuck facing another empty hallway. Suddenly, Human Torch goes flying by from one side of the camera to the other.
    • At one point Pat stands back in a corridor while everyone goes on ahead and has the Thing hold a giant crate up in front of the camera so no one can see anything.
  • In Batman & Robin, Batman foils Mr Freeze's plan to steal a diamond from the museum by running around in the vents teargassing himself trying to disable the diamond's protective forcefield, until Mr Freeze arrives and shuts off the forcefield himself. Batman then runs away with the diamond, saving the city.
  • An entire month of terrible superhero games is clearly taking a toll on Pat. With each video, he sounds more and more depressed and tired. It'd be concerning if it weren't so funny.
  • Several moments stand out during the video for The Incredible Hulk: Ultimate Destruction:

     Final Fantasy 8 
  • The description of the video says that for time's sake, all the unimportant parts of the game are edited out. After the game's introduction, almost the entirety of the 45 minute video is spent with Liam and Woolie going around playing Triple Triad with everyone they can.
  • On a meta level, the majority of the Youtube comments consist of people either saying how much FF 8 sucks or defending it without even realizing what the video is actually about.
  • Liam and Woolie suddenly remember that they still have to go rescue Rinoa... but call it off once they recall that they already have her card in their deck.
  • After destroying Sorceress Ultimecia for refusing to play card games with them, Liam and Woolie realize the game is over and they have to wait through the credits before playing Triple Triad again. They proceed to turn off the Play Station One and insert disc 1.


    Bomb-Ass Adventures! 
  • Matt's Bomb-Ass Trip to the Zoo video where he indulges in a newfound love for red pandas - as hinted at in the promos for the Super Best Friends Podcast - but not only that; As he's visiting with a lady-friend, he actually pulls off an incredibly cheesy line about 'filming beautiful creatures' when she catches him filming her and not the animals.
  • In 'Bomb-Ass Wrestling Adventure!, in continuation of trying to get the WWE to acknowledge Chris Benoit, Pat brings a sign reading "BRING BACK BENOIT".
  • In Matt's Bomb-Ass Journalism Thing About Cereal!, Matt spends about ten minutes, alone, in a supermarket making a video about various brands of cereal.
    • Near the end of the video, Matt spots Reese Puffs. Cue Smash Cut of him pushing a cart absolutely packed with boxes of it.
    • Matt compares the mascot of Apple Jacks to Woolie (due to the fact they both have dread locks), calling it an Ancient Conspiracy and that Woolie is somehow involved with all cereals.
    • There's a cut to Matt giving Woolie some cereal and telling him it's really good. Woolie takes a bite and gives a face that makes it look like he just ingested sour milk...then 5 seconds later says "oh man this is so good!" and starts rapidly eating the cereal.

     Friendcast Mailbag 
Mailbag #1
  • There's a great but subtle moment where there's a very brief camera cut, as if something needed to be edited out. After the cut, Pat is covering his face with his hand in disbelief, and Matt declares "I just made the video!"

Mailbag #2
  • The last package they open. There's some build-up to it as Woolie removes the bubble wrap that's obscuring it, only to reveal a rather large, framed portrait of Steve Buscemi. They all agree that it's for Pat.
    Woolie: Enjoy Steve Buscemi staring at you.

Mailbag #4
  • Once again, the last packages turn out to be the most fun, including Pat being sent not one, but two babies in response to an off-hand comment he made on the podcast, 8lbs of cereal marshmallows, and a Bayonetta figure that almost causes the gang to kill each other.

Mailbag #6-A
  • After several episodes of jokes about the inevitable package full of vipers, the friends receive a disc of Viper's album You Cowards Don't Even Smoke Crack. Woolie bursts out laughing. And is later attacked by snakes no less than three times.
  • The slightly unnerving piece of mail the best friends receive; It's either utterly hilarious or slight nightmare fuel given the content, which is some sort of stapled together collection of bizarre odds and ends and increasingly off-putting writing including Silence of the Lambs quotes. Pat in particular states that they're not sure at all if it's hate mail or some sort of bizarro stalker package.
  • Their reactions when one of the gifts turns out to be a carton of Sekuma Magical Drops.
    Woolie: YEAH!
    Pat: You fucking...!
    Liam: Wait, what? Oh NO!
    Matt: NOOOOOOOO!
    Pat: FUCKER, NO!

Mailbag #6-B
  • The Best Friends' reactions must be seen to be believed when they get a limited edition Gurren Lagann box set, valued at over $500. Their reactions are even more hilarious when they find a second box set in another package.

Mailbag #9-A/B
  • Pat now seems to be attempting to make viewers and/or Liam as uncomfortable as possible by staring at the camera in silence for prolonged periods.

Mailbag #10-A
  • One fan writes a letter asking Pat if he would marry her, followed by her asking Liam to be her mistress.
  • One letter reads "Katie. Sincerely Jay." As the Best Friends wonder why someone would write that, Woolie opens a letter that reads "Jay. Sincerely, Katie."

Mailbag #10-B
  • The Best Friends receive another weapon - this time a sword - which Pat is given. Putting the sword in it's sheathe, he promptly attempts to see if he can wear the blade hanging from his waist. It's almost touching the floor.
  • In rapid succession, they receive two romantic rubber fists. They're able to tell the second one as soon as they touch it, unwrapping it while giggling. The next few minutes are them just laughing about it.

Mailbag #11-C
  • The Best Friends find a wrapped, framed dickbutt in a gift they receive. The frame completely falls apart when Woolie tries to put it up, sending all four of them into a fit of laughter.

Mailbag #11-D
  • The final gift they get for the video is a giant rainbow horse dildo. The box is opened with a cut to each of the best friends in silence with shocked expressions as Woolie pulls it out, and the last few minutes have all of them playing with it while they comment on its size and laugh.

Mailbag #12
  • The guys finally get a box full of dragon dildos from a recurring sender, but the sender said that they were going to be used. After pulling them out, it hastily cuts to Woolie holding them with grocery bags, terrified at the prospect that they might have actually been used, since they were out of the packaging.

Mailbag #13-A
  • The very first rule ever set for the mailbag was a simple "no live animals." So of course this mailbag included a burlap bag filled with 1000 live ladybugs.
  • A fan sends them some Finnish candy, which is infamous for having a very acquired taste. The guys ingest it and... well, the looks on their faces say enough, it gets to the point where Pat and Liam have to drink out of the same mug to get the taste out of their mouths.

  • Woolie's Never Live It Down moment has become so widely known that if one were to type just his name into the search bar on youtube, the second suggestion (After his match with Daigo) is
    Youtube:woolie chooses mvc3 over sex. with two women. at the same time
    • Matt and Pat bring it up again when they make a similar video for the Metal Gear Rising launch, except that Matt chose to get it on with the women, and still make it in time for the launch. At the end, Matt sees Woolie coming over to him, and he promptly disappears.
  • Matt slowly and shamefully revealing just how much Predator merchandise he has purchased over the years.
  • Adventure Time with Matt the Human: An entire video dedicated to Matt gloating about how he got the 3DS game before Pat.
    Matt:Did you know that Adventure Time is a show that Pat knows more about than me? That he's seen more episodes than me? And that he's the one who introduced me to it? But I'm the one who gets the game first. I guess that's because all gods hate him and love me instead.
  • Pat stealing Matt's limited edition of Metal Gear Rising in the unboxing video.
  • A fan made a Skyrim mod that adds Matt, Pat, and Woolie as a set of recruitable companions. The three even recorded special dialogue for the mod. Trailer here.
  • Zubaz, the long running joke character removed from Street Fighter is not only making a comeback as a fighter in Divekick, he's returning as a goddamn giant mecha in Kaiju Combat and as a Bonus Boss in Shovel Knight.
  • Posted on Facebook for Similarly Named Works hilarity, How To Wash The Woolie.
    • Someone took that audio and remixed it to an animation.
  • When Matt runs across Suda51 at E3, he hopes Suda will notice him today.
    • The Two Best Friends Facebook page announced E3 videos with one of the features being Game Grumps. Fans immediately speculated how a crossover between the two would go, and what happened in the epic confrontation? Matt passes by Egoraptor in the hallway and they just offhandedly say "Hey" to each other, not even recognizing who each of them are.
    • In the E3 videos, the Running Gag of people confusing Matt and Pat with the "Game Guys".
    • Liam and Woolie...At E3! No wait. Just a Best Buy. Woolie takes off his hat and walks off, disappointed.
  • Ladies and gentlemen, "Woolie The Liar Stole My Pie"
  • In general, whenever the video cuts off and Green Greens starts playing. Apparently Matt and Pat chose to stick with the theme because of how jarring it can be, depending on which game they play.
  • The Beyond: Two Souls playthrough includes various jokes based on Jojos Bizarre Adventure. A fan animated them accordingly.
  • The preview video for Friendcast 40 showed Pat squeeing over a large dog. This lead to fan art of Pat and a giant dog, including Pat's face imposed on Nina Tucker from Fullmetal Alchemist, leading to Chimera Pat
Arts & Crafts with Liam & Matt
  • A hilarious Bad Bad Acting bit all around with one of the funnier moments being where they proclaim they'll be making hair scrunchies today. Smash Cut to them pulling a burning pile of something out of an oven.
    • Matt, Liam and Woolie are constantly tempted by video games (in particular, TheWonderful101) where Matt has to remind everyone to stay on topic. Naturally Liam draws a scene from the game (which Matt gets mad at him for) and Woolie starts playing the game while supposedly videotaping the duo.
      • Despite this Matt ALSO makes a scene from a videogame, prompting a big "What the hell?" reaction from Liam. He then attempts to put his "artwork" on Liam's fridge, only for Liam to slap it off in disgust.

     Super Best Friends Podcast 

SBFP 001: This Is Gonna Be Terrible

SBFP 002: The Feel of a Podcast
  • When Matt sent out a copy of DMC: Devil May Cry to the winner of a giveaway, the winner never responded, and the Best Friends come to the conclusion that the winner mistook the game for the HD remastering of the original series.
    Matt: The guy never told me whether he got it or not...I sent it out and everything...
    Pat: You killed him!
    Matt: I'm sorry dead kid...

SBFP 003: My Snake Have Started to Move
  • Woolie's cicada impression and the ensuing mental image of Woolie physically making the noise in shows.
  • Woolie suggests that Street Fighter 5 will come out at roughly the same time as manned missions to Mars. This somehow transitions into a joke about Woolie as a Mars Rover that constantly lies about finding life.
  • Pat's segment on why you should and should not get a gaming PC, with his voice increasing in pitch throughout the entire bit.
    Pat: Okay, so Saints Row 4 came out last week. I get all hyped for Saints Row 4. I go to play it, I'm playing it, everything's great, I'm having lots of fun, except there's like a really weird slight line in between one of the hair models, on their scalps.
    Matt: So you threw out your PC.
    Pat: So I'm like, man, my drivers must be bad, cause I'm using the catalyst 13.6 AMD drivers from my video card. So I go, oh, I'll get the newest beta drivers, but then I do that and then Youtube starts breaking, so how do I roll it back? I can't roll it back to the non-beta drivers, I can only roll it back to the earlier beta drivers which i'm worried about! So now I have the new beta drivers at 13.8, but i'm worried about video playback, and so i'm freaking out and I do a system restore, and then the fucking sony content manager assistant for the Vita breaks, and I lose some of the saves I put up on there, so I've been playing Divekick instead!
    Others: YEAH!
    Liam: Buy a gaming PC everybody.
  • Towards the end of the Podcast, Liam's utter excitement and glee when a fan asks them if they've 'ever been sucked up in a shitty card game'.
    Liam: OH BOY!
    • The groans of the other three as Liam starts to list off card games he's played are pure gold.

SBFP 004: It Can't Have All Been For Nothing
  • Near the end of the podcast, they point out Matt always automatically replaces the word "wrestling" with "rustling" since Rustlemania has begun.

SBFP 005: Pure Scumbag Tactics Are The Only Way To Win
  • Matt's story of how he got MGS4, despite not having a PS3.
  • Liam's reaction to the reveal of the Pokémon Origins anime.

SBFP 006: Nothing Good Ever Comes In A Bucket
  • An email asks the Friends' opinions on the Tales series. This ends up creating a huge argument between Matt and Pat about Tales vs. Xenogears.
    • The next two Podcast release videos mock Xenogears. Matt offhandedly mentions Xenogears, causing Liam to ask "What's Xenogears?" For Episode 7, Woolie asks Pat what his favorite moment is, then dubs over Pat's response to announce the next episode is up.
  • Woolie jokes that David Cage's games would scare them if they were sitting around a campfire, telling scary stories.
    "Running home, and you trip over a copy of Heavy Rain, and then you look up to the moon and it's BEYOND TWO SOULLLLLLLS!"

SBFP 008: The Feel Bad Show Of The Century
  • The sponsor of this particular episode used "Woolie" as a promotional code.
  • Drunk Pat. Sure, he was drunk because he was depressed over the Jojo fiasco, but it makes him super enthusiastic for the entire podcast, the Russian Ladies segment at the beginning being the best example.

SBFP 012: We Gotta Get Back to Space!
  • Pat gets very excited about the plethora of grappling characters in the new Street Fighter game.
    Matt: What if the fifth character is a grappler?
    Pat: *shrieking* I WILL PEE! WITH HAPPINESS!

SBFP 013: Never a Good Day with Swamp-ass
  • When a fan asks them which JoJo character they'd want to be, Pat has to stop and say that they can't all choose Dio.

SBFP 018: Dickbutt was a Spiderman Villain

SBFP 019: Voltron Runs on Hepatitis
  • The conversation leading up to the line that gives the episode its name:
    Pat: Wilson's dead.
    Woolie: And I replaced him, apparently.
    Matt: I was telling Pat, Pat lost his shit when I was like, "Woolie tells me, 'I was staring at a picture of Voltron, that I and Fred Durst were combining to make, and I stared at it for an hour just going, Where? Why? '"
    Woolie: Like, usually, I can figure it out even with no context. Woolie the Ent? Sure. I don't need to see that episode, I get it. I get it. It's out there, it's done.
    Pat: It makes sense.
    Woolie: But I'm staring at my head on Voltron, and a bunch of rap rockers, and I'm like, "What could have — What? I don't —"
    Pat: And they all have hepatitis!
    Liam: Is that the ties that bind?
    Pat: Yeah! It's hepatitis!
  • While discussing what would happen if Capcom went bankrupt and its properties were bought up by other companies:
    Woolie: When SNK gets the Street Fighter license, I am just walking into the ocean. Like Odysseus's wife, just walking along the beach, and then I'm gone.
    Matt: And as you go you're, like, shredding your clothes off, for some reason.
    Woolie: Just tears of blood.

SBFP 022: What does the Doug button do?
  • The four summarizing the Final Fantasy X-2.5 novel leads to some hilarious reactions, particularly Pat explaining why the sequels to Final Fantasy X are terrible, with his pitch and tone consistently increasing as he goes.

SBFP 025: Smegmaman is the worst
  • The group are discussing the recent name change of Namco-Bandai to Bandai-Namco when the following happens:
    Matt: I don't even say Bandai, I aways say Namco, cause they make the games.
    Pat: I'm edgy, so I say Scamco. I also like to spell Microsoft with a dollar sign.
    Matt: I know I do. Cha-Ching!
    Brief bit of laughter and sighs from the group:
    Matt: Ah, I can't wait to move into that GIANT, EXPENSIVE apartment that I can suddenly afford!
    Pat: That apartment that prior to you arriving had no Xbone, but now you can put Xbone in it!
    Liam: *Deadpan Tone* You can fit an Xbox One, the all in one entertainment system from Microsoft -
    Pat: Okay, Okay, everybody stop, this joke has gone on too far.
    Liam: Do I still get paid for it though?
  • For context, this happened in the same week that it was revealed Microsoft were paying Youtubers for Xbox One mentions and support in videos, an offer that wasn't even given to the Best Friends due to them insulting the Xbox One and Kinect repeatedly.

SBFC 030: No More Dutch Rudders
  • The group ponders what kind of Anachronism Stew Plague of Gripes has in his work area: Sitting in a rocking chair on a porch and wearing overalls, while using a laptop and drawing on a Cintiq tablet... then stopping to drink from a trough.

SBFC 031: Butthurt Nuns are Totally a Thing
  • An anecdote about Buff Bagwell being a successful gigolo somehow leads into a new permutation of the Ric Flair jokes:
    Woolie: But it's like, you go, "Hey, old wrestlers, where are they now?" "Dead. Fuckin', melting. Falling apart."
    Pat: "Drunk and dead."
    [scattered laughter]
    Liam: Getting revived for special events.
    Matt: I think Scott Hall is a Hollow…
    Matt: …right now!
    Pat: He's gonna get into it. He's gonna get into it just for the jokes!
    [more laughter]
    Woolie: Fuckin' Razor Ramone burning a Human Effigy
    [seven seconds of helpless cackling]
    Matt: [sizzling hiss] "Hey, yo! Praise the sun, yo!"
    Liam: Collecting humanity from dead wrestlers.
    [another ten seconds of laughter and coughing fits]
    Woolie: All right —
    [Pat continues laughing]
    Pat: All I can see is Chris Benoit, but he's all, just, red!

SBFC 038: Not Safe For Life

SBFC 039: Buttered Poopers Have A Lot Of Groundswell

  • The announcement video for the Podcast features Liam and Woolie "shooting" at each other using a hunting game rifle and a Wii zapper respectively, whilst flopping about on Matt's furniture and floor. It's crowned when Woolie "dies" and Liam promptly runs over to teabag him.

SBFC 040: The Good Stuff comes from the 3rd Ass-chamber
  • The bootstrapping of Groose's Theme into the Theme of Rape Horse.
    Pat: Ohhh, that's an inside joke. Oh, that's too inside.
  • Liam assumes the phrase "one-drop rule" means "you get to say one incorrect thing without being mocked for it". He could not be more wrong.
    Woolie: No, no, no, it's a funny twist, but I just think racism's funnier. I'm, I'm… eternally amused.
    Matt: It's always funny.
    Pat: It's funny in this context!
    Woolie: Well, yeah! It's great! …All three fifths of me are laughing! [chuckles]
    Pat: [chuckles] Please tell me I don't have to explain that to you, Liam.

SBFC 043: Too Much Wiener Slappin'
  • At the request of a fan the boys put together 60 seconds of sports analysis:
    Pat: The Football man ran across the field
    Woolie: Sports ball!
    Liam: We had the hockey match recently.
    Matt: The Montreal team beat the New York Floridas

SBFC 047: It's All Downhill From Here
  • Late in the podcast the talk turns again to Liam's trip to Japan. Woolie brings up that Liam probably just watched anime (in Japan!) Matt finds the image that Liam spent sixteen hours traveling to Japan only to just sit in his apartment all day and watch unsubtitled anime hilarious.
  • Apparently, the first time Pat tried to learn what Homestuck was, he sincerely thought that he had to input commands.

SBFC 048: That's Not A Baby, That's A Pile Of Syringes
  • One of the odder Letter Time questions leads to Pat being very proud that none of the Zaibatsu answered with "semen."
    Liam: We have this ticker that said, "0 Days Without A Dick Joke" and I guess it's staying there.
    Pat: You go to roll it over and it's just "0" underneath!
    Liam: Preemptively.

SBFC 049: Living In The Database
  • The ad-spot for Loot Crate reveals Pat's frustration with Pirate Hot Topic.
  • When playing Own, Work For or Burn Down with the websites 4chan Tumblr and Reddit, Pat comes to the conclusion that he should burn down the internet, making the world a utopia. When Matt points out that he'd be back at his previous job, and Woolie points out he'd have to leave his house to buy things, Pat decides to burn down the earth.
    Matt: Burn it to the ground?
    Pat: Yeah, that's right.

SBFC 050: PJ Phil Is Becoming Shang Tsung
  • The taste test for the Banana Split Oreos prompts the return of Woolie's food-induced chain of "nope"s, only seen before when a fan sent them salmiakki.

     Super Best Friends Watch: E 3 Press Conferences 2014 
  • Their joking attempts to showcase themselves drinking Gatorade to the audience. Then, Matt laughs about the idea of a giant check rising up from behind the couch if they support Microsoft's conference
  • Pat makes a joke about watching their facial expressions turning from disgust at a bad game to excitement as it means they will have a good game to play for the show.
  • Matt's Fresh Prince joke that continues into the Sony video
    Matt: At the start of these things, I always feel like the Fresh Prince. "Where are the video games!?"
  • Matt grabs Zach as gameplay of the Call of Duty game is revealed and has him do a little dance.
  • Pat's struggle to maintain a stable stream and his ensuing frustration
  • The sheer boredom that exudes from the guys as the SCEA CEO, Shawn Layden, talks on and on about the PS 4 in ways that they felt did not need to be known is pretty funny. They make a lot of jokes about the man's hand gestures and how he's just barely stopping from blurting out the word "business." Then, right before he announces Sony's newest console (Playstation TV), the stream freezes for several seconds and we get a shot of Layden standing there as he stares at the camera.
  • Their hype at the prospect of a new Zelda game that plays like the original but, as Pat describes, with a seemingly Skyrim-esque design
  • The second they see Platinum Games come up, they immediately realize that it's Bayonetta 2 and all three of them basically have an orgasm, especially Woolie, whose arms start flailing like a wet noodle.

Let's Plays

    Resident Evil 2 
  • (the guys are talking about System Shock)
    Matt (imitating SHODAN): You think you can defeat me, hacker? well, you cannot, 'cuz my shit is running crazy styles all over this bitch.
    Pat: I think your memory is a little off.
    Matt: No, that was verbatim!
  • During Part 4 of their playthrough, Pat is talking about a file in the game (the contents of which he apparently memorized), when he adds:
    Pat: I dunno, I didn't work for Capcom back in '97.
    Matt: You didn't? Wait, wait, whoa whoa, you didn't?
    Pat: No, back when I was ten years old, I did not work for Capcom.
    Matt: Jesus, tons of revelations coming out during this...
  • Partway through Part 9 of their playthrough (at the end of Claire's A scenario), their usual off-topic conversation gets lampshaded.
    Matt: So this is the part in RE2 where you have nothing to do.
    Pat: Yeah, absolutely. I've killed all the enemies in the game, and so that means it's time to talk about Lethal Weapon.
  • During Part 11:
    Pat: If you use first aid spray, it knocks your ranking down.
    Matt: Oh, we can't have that, can we?
    Pat: No, I want to play with some HUNKs. (Beat) Shut up, just shut up. I don't wanna hear whatever you're about to say about that.
  • In Part 12, Matt explains the expression "Soup Kitchen". Pat immediately wishes he could unlearn it.
  • Part 14, where we have reached discussions about how much Hideo Kojima can possibly stretch out the Metal Gear series; Whilst the two show genuine enthusiasm for a WW2-era game starring the Boss, Matt has them both rolyling with laughter following his proposal of one of the game's interactive scenes featuring Ocelot's birth.
    Matt: Ocelot's going to shoot out of the Boss' vag and he's gonna be spinning the umbilical cord around his finger, over his back n' shit!!
  • Also Part 14, Matt suddenly leaves and Pat has to monologue.
    "If you're wondering why I'm talking to myself, it's because Matt fucked off for no reason. He doesn't care about you. He thinks you're all stupid! But that's okay. Because I'm still here, I guess."
  • Also, the ongoing saga of Mister X; Upon the scene where he bursts through the wall of the RPD's briefing room, Matt bellows;

    Silent Hill: Downpour 
  • Pat's Tour-Guide Nixon voice.
    • "Kids love the Devil!"
  • Matt losing his shit over the inplausibly evil names of Silent Hill's tourist destinations, culminating in him bellowing "COME TO THE FUCKING DEVIL'S PIT AND SEE THE CAVE OF TEARS!" during Pat's Tour-Guide Nixon voice.
  • The sequence with Pat encouraging Matt to shift a box around in Part 4 of the Let's Play. Because of Pat's tone and the length of the sequence - the sheer number of times that Pat tells him "No, forward a little. Back a little. Forward some more," - it really just makes it seem like Pat is fucking with Matt and Matt doesn't realise it. I don't think Pat meant it to be funny, but given than he's set Matt up with a lengthy setup before (as in one of the Assassin's Creed videos), it's one of those things I expected to have a payoff.
  • "Train guy was DRUNK!"
  • Matt repeatedly going up to flashing objects, and wondering what they are, and if he can pick them up and use, even though he's seen them a million times before, and Pat keeps telling him they are not good weapons.
    (Matt sees a flashing pile of bricks that look exactly like bricks he has picked up before)
    Matt: What's that?
    Pat: That's bricks!
    Matt: Oh, I thought it was like a pile of bricks. What's that?
    Pat: (tired) That's a fire extinguisher.
  • Part 9 sees them in an unusual office with one of the game's numerous files;
    Pat: Pick up that evil book!
  • How does Matt begin Part 10? By accidentally chucking his axe, one of the most valuable weapons in the game, into the giant gorge in the middle of the street. You just can't beat that.
    • Made even better that most of part ten is just Matt wandering around haplessly looking for a light bulb not even vital to the main plot, of all things.
    • Actually, what makes it even funnier is that right after Matt throws the axe, he goes to get another weapon and gets attacked by a monster—which genuinely scares Matt.
  • In Part 11, they go into a flashback in the movie theater. After only mild reactions/gasps to the game's previous Jump Scares, Matt freaks out when a basketball falls out of a basketball hoop. Pat immediately turns it into a joke.
    Matt: AAAAAH! That was scary!
    Pat: I wasn't paying attention. What happened?
    Pat: That's the ghost of the Harlem Globetrotters.
  • Matt's general inability to navigate through the game. It's across a number of episodes, but the amount of times Pat has told him to go right or left and Matt's gone in entirely the opposite direction is getting too high to count.
  • In Part 13, Matt forgets how the combat controls work, and repeatedly throws his axe at enemies standing right in front of him. Funnier, this proves to be far more effective than just hitting them with it.
  • Matt utterly hates the entire "school play" puzzle. Pat adopts a hilariously sarcastic tone while guiding him through it.
  • In part fifteen, Matt is attacked by the boss, a giant man in a gas mask.
    Pat: Aw c'mon HUNK, I didn't mean it when I said Tofu was better! The Fourth Survivor rocks!
  • Matt points out yet another plothole in Part 17: "Why does the prison that has no electricity, have electricity?"
  • Matt and Pat's speculation on Murphy's wife in Part 17 after reading her letter is just hilarious.
  • Every time Pat reads a blacked out name in one of the notes or files. It always comes out as some weird noise akin to "derpy derp."
  • Pat pronounces Murph's name in a weird New York Accent for most of the game, ala "Moiph."
  • Matt's refusal to run away from an enemy as it caused him to hit a wire and get electrocuted. He simply turns around and kills the creature with the axe, screaming, "AMERICA!" on the killing blow.
  • Matt's growing exasperation at having to read every single note out loud.
    Pat: Oh, look, a note!
    Matt: GODDAMMIT!
    • At one point Pat sarcastically notes that when he played RE2 Matt was constantly bugging him to stop and read the various files in the game.
  • Any time they mock the utter lack of anything scary in the game. Especially if they deadpan about how they peed their pants at a cheap Jump Scare.
  • After hours and hours of monotonous, tedious, nonsensical gameplay, Matt and Pat end the game in Part 19 the only truly appropriate way possible—by simultaneously screaming "FUCK YOU!" at the "Thank you" screen at the end credits. Well said, gents. Well said.
  • Matt and Pat comment how the game would be actually scarier with dubstep.
  • While wandering around the abandoned diner in Part 2.
    Pat: *reading a kid's guidebook* "Hey kids: Is Silent Hill a special place to you? If you were naming this area, what would you call it?" I'd call it the fucking Devil's Asshole!
  • The conversation about Triangle Girl, immortalized in this animation by Plague of Gripes.
    Sater: First time visitor, huh?
    Pat: SEE?! Like, everyone knows that Silent Hill is totally fucked.
    Matt (imitating Sater): Oh, you didn't know about our crazy zombie people running around, did you?
    Pat (also imitating Sater): Are you saying you don't know Pyramid Head?
    Matt: Pyramid Head and me, we go way back. We used to drive around in our Jeep Chevys.
    Pat: I used to date his sister, Triangle Girl!
    Matt: Triangle Girl's crazy hot!
    Pat: She gives the worst head!
    Matt: She's so sharp and polygony!
    Pat: It's like driving a protractor up your dick! It's the worst!
  • The game has a UV light that often shows large bloodstains on the walls. Pat mentions a video comment claiming a UV light shouldn't show bloodstains (it can), then concludes the walls were actually covered in semen.

    Final Fight Streetwise 
  • "That dog'll never ride a horse again."
  • Devin "The Stiff", the boss that WILL! NOT! DIE!
  • The end of Part 9, in which the game crashes, and the last minute or so of the video is Matt and Pat riffing over a completely black screen.
    • And, of course, this sent the two back four parts of the review, because the game can only save when you quit.
  • Part 10, where Pat spends a majority of a timed level trying to figure out how to dodge from Matt, who figured it out while playing the game back to where they were only to forget it.
  • More of a meta Funny Moment than anything, but this game was so aggressively awful that the Let's Play was put on hold, because Pat refused to play it any more. The breaking point might have been the game not saving after a second boss battle with Devin "The Stiff" (see above)
  • Matt saying "I need a cookie" in this adorable childlike voice in part 5, and their subsequent dissection of Matt's work ethic and Woolie's fear of his parents.

    Donkey Kong Country 
  • In the Elevator Antics stage at world five, they have just arrived at the end of a difficult stage when Matt follows a set of elevators down a chasm freaking Woolie out; but it just happens that brings them to a bonus area. It is specially funny when you remember the ending of Matt's and Pat's video in the Wii's Donkey Kong.
  • Matt as Diddy finding an enemy that only DK is heavy enough to jump on, so he tags in Woolie, who promptly misses the jump and dies.
  • After beating the World 5 boss, Mat and Woolie get psyched to take on K. Rool... only to end up having to go through World 6 first, which Mat completely forgot about.

    Super Best Friends Watch: Metroid Other M 
  • A few minutes after comparing the soldiers in Other M unfavorably to the squads in Aliens and Predator:
    Woolie: Okay, y'know what? There really should've been a Vasquez on this team.
    Pat: Absolutely! Y'know who it should've been? SAMUS! You fuckin' idiot!
  • At the end, Anthony turns out to be alive.
    Pat: It's a loss for women, but go black guys!
  • Matt's Motherbrain voice. It's fucking hysterical.
  • Pat and Woolie arguing about the game, with Pat especially getting riled up:
    Pat: Oh no the baby, what if I never see the baby again? What will I do with out the baby—cause I'm a lady, I need babies!
    Woolie:—W-well, they do!
    Pat: (very angrily) NO THEY DON'T!
    Woolie: THEY DO.
    Pat: NO THEY DON'T!
  • Samus' Menopause Adventures
    Pat: "Oh, the baby! I need the baby!"
    Woolie: 'Cause she really sounds like a hysterical 40-year-old woman.
    Pat: Hell yeah. How do you know she's not 40 years old? This whole weird thing can be accounted for because it's Samus' Menopause Adventures.

    Super Best Friends Watch: Metal Gear Solid 4 
  • On sending Metal Gears to the moon:
    Woolie: Brother! We are the moon now!
    Pat: We'll drag the moon into the 21st century!
    Matt: The moon is just a big, huge Metal Gear. You won't believe how big this Metal Gear is.
  • When discussing Peace Walker:
    Pat: First of all, he romanticizes Sandinista rebels from Nicaragua which is super weird-
    Matt and Woolie: Nicaragua.
    Pat: -which is super weird. But then-(Woolie laughs) What was that?
  • While Pat and Woolie discuss the game intelligently, Matt is the only one who focuses on Johnny's butt until the end of the video.
    Matt: That is really spankingly, well done ass, I have to say. That was modeled really well.
    at the end of the video:
    Matt: Man, that is a really well rendered butt.
    and later:
    Matt: And right now Snake should be telling Johnny he has a nice butt.

    Heavy Rain 
  • The game constantly interrupting them at the start of the video about installations and using peripherals that Pat does not have, such as the PS Eye Camera and Playstation Move. At one point, Pat was explaining why they decided to do a Let's Play, despite already having done an episode on it before, but gets sidetracked by all the loading and a warning screen about the PS Eye.
    • Then it's revealed the reason they chose it was because of how easy it was for them to riff on the first time; they only needed a half-hour to collect all the footage they posted on their initial video, way less than their usual ones.
  • Pat's expert babysitting, culminating in Pat wondering why he can't just put the baby's bottle in the microwave.
    Pat: Baby will learn the rules of the Wasteland.
    Pat: And then the baby will burn its lips a little, and grow up to be humongous.
    Matt [Russian accent]: Get out of here Baby STALKER.
    Pat [Also Russian]: Baby S.T.A.L.K.E.R., you are too strong!
  • Matt and Pat on Shelby's reluctant partnership with Lauren.
    Matt [singing]: It's private dick and prostitute! Solving all the problems of the dead children!
    (beat, game focuses on Shelby and Lauren pulling up in their car)
    Pat: ...these kids are pretty dead.
    (both of them start making electric guitar noises)
  • Pat torturing Matt when Norman Jayden is examining the piece of evidence that will lead to the fight with the Scary Black Man:
    Matt: Oh that's that black guy you have a terrible fight with.
    Pat: Maybe...
    Matt: It's the first video that made me think "I hate Heavy Rain." (Pat laughs) that I remember seeing. I was like: "I have no interest in this now."
    Pat: It's an optional fight; you don't have to do it.
    Matt: That's cool.
    Pat: We're gonna do it though! (deranged giggling)
    Matt: You're the worst best friend.
    Pat: I am the worst.
  • Upon being introduced to the character of John Shepperd, Pat makes a Mass Effect 3 reference to it's notorious ending.
    Pat: Commander Shepard! Commander Shepard got pissed off about his shitty ending and back in time to fuck up the ending for another game!
  • The horrible line reading of the protagonist yelling for his son Jason is pretty funny. "JAY-SUN!" And it gets better in Part 8, when he hallucinates his son in a crowded train station and he starts yelling for him again, with the exact same sound clip.
  • When Lauren explains to Shelby that her son often got into fights with other kids:
    Pat: (in a bad French accent) My mom isn't a prostitute- even if she is a prostitute!
  • Mat, when a Madison segment turns out to be an Ethan one.
  • They lost their shit when Shelby sits at his table, looking incredibly defeated.
  • Pat's hilarious reaction when he finds out that Daigo, of EVO fame, is actually a nurse. He's filled with joy by the fact that Woolie got beat by a male nurse.
  • In the Finale, when Madison needs to escape from a burning apartment, Pat decides to talk about the infamous "fridge nuking" scene from Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull seemingly for no reason. Pat then does exactly that to survive an imminent explosion. Mat's reaction is priceless.
  • During the credits, Pat decides that since Beyond: Two Souls already has 'ghost tricking' as a mechanic what it really needs is Missile. Naturally this leads to a discussion on the awesomeness of Wishbone.

    Eternal Darkness: Sanity's Requiem 
  • In Part 5, Pat has finally taken enough damage to his sanity meter for the house to start freaking him out. Such as the random knocking on doors, or the statue that watches him as he moves.
    Pat: It's already - I'm too nuts. I've done a bad job.
    Pat: ...Is that the fuckin' bathtub scare?!
    Matt: Yeah.
    Pat: Jesus! I've heard about that thing a billion times! ...And I knew that this game had a bathtub scare! And it still got me!
  • Part 6 abruptly ends when a fire alarm goes off, causing Matt and Pat to both leave partway through the Let's Play.
    • In later episodes, whenever they return to that room, Pat exclaims, "I remember this room! It's the fire alarm room!"
  • In part 7, Matt tries to warn Pat not to heal when your sanity is low. But...
    Matt: Oh hey guess what-
    Pat: It's fine
    *Karim explodes from the waist up*
    Pat: ...It's fine.
  • Tour-Guide Nixon voice returning in Part 9.
  • In the Lindsey chapter, Pat runs low on health and magic. He heads off to a side room to recover, but he needs walking distance to Walk It Off. Ignoring Matt's advice, he decides to walk through the hallway of swinging blades instead of circling the entrance.
    Matt: But you couldn't do this before!
    Pat: It's fine!
    *Lindsey gets chopped in half and collapses, Matt is Dumb Struck*
    • Gets worse in the next part where they reveal that they are rerecording the current part because they accidentally lost 40 minutes of footage after Pat died.
  • Near the beginning of the next episode where they run into a room full of blue zombies, and they decide to to enchant the shotgun to see what it will do. After laughing at the terrible enchanting animation, this happens:
    Pat: Alright let's give this gun a shot.
    *One-Hit Kill all zombies in the room*
    Matt: (While Pat is laughing hysterically)What?! So, that worked out well!
    • They then proceed to call it the Insanity Shotgun (it's enchanted by the insanity-aligned god). When they later enchant the gun with power, they lament that "Power Shotgun" doesn't sound as cool.
  • During the opening cutscene of Paul Luther's chapter, Augustine's welcome for Paul to the cathedral ends with him speaking very lowly close behind him with his hands on his shoulders..
  • The polar opposite of Lindsey's needless death occurs at the end of Part 12, where Paul Luther, now controlled by Matt, dies fighting one bone thief and Pat gets mad, then even madder when he realises Matt hasn't been Save Scumming and has thus lost an entire part's worth of progress, declaring he'll take back control and at least do a better job in that regard. The video ends in the middle of their bickering Like an Old Married Couple.
  • In Part 14, they finally get to face the giant monster boss that they saw Pious summon earlier in the chapter. It steps on Paul and squishes him like a bug in a cutscene. Even funnier because Matt prepped a bunch of spells for the fight and was psyching himself up for it beforehand. Made even funnier by Pat's stunned "...OKAY!"
  • At the beginning of Part 15, Pat shows some trepidation at the narrative's demand that they now find eighty-eight keys. Matt's a little quicker to catch on:
    Pat: I need eighty-eight fuckin' keys!
    Matt: Now —
    Pat: That's where we fuckin' left off!
    Matt: I'm gonna use my own brain —
    Pat: Mhm.
    Matt: — and say that we probably need to find a piano.
    Pat: Use your — [long pause] OHHHHHHHHH! Man that's good.
  • The Running Gag of not realizing which Ancient's magic to cast against which other one reaches its peak in Part 16, when they see a rune and proceed to waste the rest of the video doing nothing productive to dispel it. This is 1 minute after they remind everyone they remembered it.
  • In general, whenever they get trolled by the sanity effects, particularly the fake To Be Continued screen and the hallway full of illusionary shotgun ammo.
  • Part 21 begins with Matt and Pat explaining that it took them over an hour to figure out how to defeat the boss. Then, once they finally figured it out, they re-recorded the fight... and accidentally didn't save the audio. So they had to fight it again.
    • When Pat enters the Roivas' basement to restore power to the second floor bathroom. He gets to the bathroom and just before entering, realizes he completely forgets about the fusebox. After using the penny in place of a fuse, he gets back to the second floor and enters the bathroon to find that he forgot to trip the breaker.
  • In Part 23, they are struggling in a room where there are a couple difficult enemies and die. When they try again they use as many buffs as they can (including turning "Fucking Invisible") but when the enter the room, they decide to try and run through the room since the monsters don't notice them. They succeed. Cue hysterical laughter.
    Matt: "Holy shit, this is some Assassin's Creed shit here!"
  • Part 25/26 has several call backs to their Silent Hill: Downpour playthrough, including the Fire Axe (which Matt repeatedly tells Pat to throw away), calling the underground ruin the Devil's Pit, and Pat's Tour-Guide Nixon voice. This may also be a reference to a Plague of Gripes animation, which depicted that part of their Downpour playthough.
  • Just as Matt and Pat are getting the hang of the boss fight - and they're reallly pumped about it - Pat gets trapped inside one of Pious's damage field spells and is killed. Cue restarting the boss fight.

    Way of the Samurai 4 
  • Their reactions when they reach the end of their playthrough and end up getting boiled alive by Kinugawa, and their subsequent reactions on how this was apparently the Normal Ending.

    Chrono Trigger 
  • Their Sylvester Stallone impressions near the end of Part 11.
    Pat: How 'bout this one? Aruharwawarawuh Taco Bell!
  • During the fight with Black Tyranno, Matt gets up and Pat guesses he's going to change the heater because his feet are cold, and Matt says he knows that because his feet are cold too. Then Matt goes and eats some Cheerios, which pisses off Pat who tells him to come back and do his "job", so Matt says his "job" is easier when he's doing it with Woolie, who Pat calls a failure.
  • Their reaction to Ayla's inspiring and eloquent speech to the pacifist Laruba elder at the end of Part 19:
    Ayla: Ayla fight while alive! Win and live. Lose and die. Rule of life. No change rule.
    Pat: This is a heartwarming speech here.
    Matt: Man, I should send everyone a Christmas card that says this.
    Pat: (reading Ayla's next line) "Old man breathe, but dead inside"? Send your dad that Christmas card!
  • When talking about Ayla being shameless, due to be being born before the concept of modesty.
    Pat: This girl's crazy, man. She'd be like "Let's go fuck on those rocks." And you'd be like, "Really? On the rocks? I like this girl!" "Rocks provide extra friction."
    Matt: Why would you want extra friction?
    Pat: I don't know.
  • "I'm done slurping shit with my shitballs."
  • In part 19, after meeting Janus and being told that "The black wind howls... one among you will shortly perish.":
    Pat: If you walked down the street, and some like 8-year old kid walked up to you and was like "Matt, the black wind is howling, you will soon perish."
    Matt: And I'm like "Oh no, Woolie's gonna kill me."
    Pat: Pretty much... Scrublords is getting out of control.
    Matt: It's getting out of control. Lots of broken bicylcles.
  • Pat forgetting to save and heal after the Hopeless Boss Fight, then dying.
    Pat: Why what's wrong with-oh my god I forgot to heal myself!
    Matt: Oh man, you're dead.
    Pat: Oh this is the stupidest mistake I have ever made!
    Matt: At least you didn't die-
    Pat: I just fucking died.
    Matt: You're dead. Did you rotate your saves?
    Pat: No.
    Matt:...Well, that concludes today's episode of the Chrono Triggers.
    Pat loads his save, which starts at where he was twenty minutes earlier
    Hard Cut to where Pat died
    Pat: Whew, okay I'm back. I'm gonna use a shelter. I'm gonna use it. Everything's great.
  • Matt asking Pat about "that old grandma noise" and Crono's cranky grandma in the beginning of Part 24.
  • When Lavos is turning into his final form, Matt exclaims "Its the tubster!" referencing an enemy seen earlier in the game with a rather silly name, that Matt ceased to drop for the rest of the playthrough.

    The Walking Dead 
  • The Let's Play starts off with a bang when Matt dies in the very first zombie encounter.
  • Matt trying to explain away Lee's past to Clementine leads to two gems in rapid succession.
    Matt: Look, kid, sometimes there are shades of grey. Fifty of them, even.
    Pat: Sometimes another guy's shtoopin' your wife. You gotta shtoop 'im out the window.
  • "Look at this kid I found! My found kid is better than your real kid."
  • They make fun of Heavy Rain and pretend to not know what it is.
  • When starting out the chapters, Pat asks Matt if he's "going to throw the ax at that little kid".
  • The "Shame Car."
    Pat: It's a pick-up.
    • Also this:
    Matt (jokingly): You have to spend one hour in "The Shame Car."
    Pat (feigning horror & chuckling): I don't wanna get in the Shame Car! Lindsey Lohan's in there!
    • Becomes an Ascended Meme in their playthrough of Divekick, where the losers have to go back in a cab labelled "The Shame Car".
  • Matt's complete and utter hatred of Duck.
    • Best exemplified in the scene where they find out Duck has been bitten.
    Matt: Nice! Nice! Fucking radical!
    • And then finally when Matt chooses to shoot duck.
    Matt: See ya later fucker!
    Pat: Na na na na
    Both: Na na na na! Hey hey hey! Goodbye!
  • Early in part 5, one of the dialogue options is "No one fucks with us." Pat and Matt periodically blurt out the phrase throughout the rest of the game.
  • When leaving the barn in part 6, the game glitches right before the loading screen, making it look like Lee Flash Steps right back into the barn.
    • They get a lot of glitches, and each one is hilarious. Ben appears to fly out of his chair while on watch at the motel, the backgrounds take a while to render during the preview of episode 4 (leading them to joke that Omid has teleportation powers), and when meeting Molly, Clementine briefly levitates and flickers in and out of view.
  • After another argument between Lilly and Kenny:
    Lee: Happy, Kenny?
    Matt: (as Kenny) My family's alive and everyone else has suffered horribly. I'm peachy-keen!
  • The many times Matt talks to Ben, where finishing the conversation makes Ben mope terribly.
    Lee: Hey, Ben.
    Ben: Hey.
    Lee: See ya.
  • Anytime Matt hears about or sees one of Ben's screwups.
  • Dead parents, basically Batman. The ladies love it.
  • When Matt gives out all the energy bars:
    Pat: I'm gonna give one of these bars to a zombie and it's gonna be a peace treaty. The zombie's going to be like "uhhhhhhhhhhhh".
  • Anytime Matt calls Brie "Cheeseface".
  • In Episode 15 as Lee and the group are heading back to get the boat, Matt remembers that Ben is guarding it.
    Matt: Isn't Ben in charge of everything?
    Pat: Yeah, Ben is in charge of guarding the boat.
    Lee opens the shed door and sees it empty except for Ben.
  • Later on in the episode when Lee is instructing the group to fortify the house, what job do they give Ben?
    Lee: Go upstairs!
    Ben: And do what?!
    Lee: Just go!
    *Matt and Pat burst out laughing*
  • The Stranger calls Kenny an "asshole in a baseball cap"
    Matt: I like this guy!
  • The final episode ends with an absolutely heart crushing scene, but it's kind of hard to be sad when Matt is talking about how the end of Ratatouille made him cry.
    • Made even better by how Pat is actually tearing up, and Matt is ignoring him and rambling on about the film.
  • At the end of the game, there's a list summing up your interactions with all of the characters. When they get to Kenny...
    Matt: Look at all the great shit I did for Kenny. Look at all that stacked up shit!
    Pat: Yeah...what a dick.
  • And then the final lines of the Let's Play:
    Matt: Alright that was fun everyone! Heavy Rain is the worst ever!
    • They make constant digs at Heavy Rain, even from Pat, who unlike Matt, enjoys the game.

    The Walking Dead: 400 Days DLC 
  • In Vince's story:
    Pat: This game is like, lionizing prisoners and criminals, to like a weird extent. Like Lee, and these guys-
    (A prisoner at the front of the bus starts strangling another prisoner)
    Matt: Oh shit!
    Pat: Well not that guy.
  • They both agree that seeing Wyatt and Eddie is surreal because Wyatt and Eddie are essentially Matt and Pat in a zombie apocalypse.
    • Pat thinks Wyatt looks like an alternate universe Caucasian Woolie.
  • The two actually take a moment to stop playing the game to argue over some crackers.
    Matt: I have some crackers in my bag, you can eat them later.
    Pat: No
    Matt: They're really good.
    Pat: You don't. You're lying. There's no way.
    Matt: Pass me my bag.
    Pat: I'm rattling this shit, there's no crackers in here you ass! You're full of shit.
    (Bag rattling)
    Pat: Fuck you.
    Matt: This is the sound of Matt's fucking crackers! What a great moment!
    Pat: Why the fuck do you just bring crackers around?
    Matt: 'Cause I was like 'I'll have Pat try these great crackers, they're yummy'.
    Matt: There's two.
    Pat: They're both for you!
    Matt: (laughing) I'm going to eat them both in front of you.
  • In a rather dark way, their reaction when they come across Carly's body. They scream in unison.
  • Pat's hypothetical exchange between characters in Shel's campaign
    Becca: What was that all about?
    Shel: I don't know. Probably not good, though. Stay here. It'll be just a minute. I'll fill you in when I get back.
    Pat (as Roman): I found a HUGE pile of food!
    Matt: *bursts out laughing* Just in the parking lot!
  • Their constant hatred of Becca is hilarious, coupled with how they see Clementine was some sort of pro-wrestler.

    Metal Gear Rising Revengeance 
  • Matt and Pat's reactions to Metal Gear RAY being the first boss.
    Pat: Fuck off.
    Matt: Right now.
    Pat: I've been playing for ten minutes.
    Matt: Maybe five.
  • Pat threatens to cut up a Metal Gear RAY's face "so much that even yo mamma won't like it". Matt remarks he is now imagining a RAY wearing an apron.
    Pat: [high-pitched voice] I can't believe you let them Solid Snakes fuck you up so bad! I didn't raise you like this shit!
  • Pat keeps forgetting that he can cut through barriers while running, despite the marketing of the game centering around cutting through everything.
  • After Raiden performs yet another insane feat of physics-defying badassitude.note  Pat more or less summarizes the premise of the game:
    Pat: Oh geez, goddammit! Okay fine! Raiden's cool again!
  • He then just keeps on gushing on how much he loves the game and how cool Raiden is.
  • While fighting Sam:
    Pat: Get fucked, Sam!
    Matt: No, you— you can't.
    Pat: Oh my god, he is so fast!
    Matt: He is unfuckable!
  • Their amazed reaction seeing Sam shoot his sword out of a gun.
    Pat: They finally did it! They went and did it! They made a gun that shoots swords!
  • Pat attempting to pathetically walk away from Sam, but ends up getting killed by him anyways.
  • Matt and Pat's reactions to the Running Gag of Courtney being clumsy and spilling her coffee.
  • Their love of how all the music in the boss fights is buttrock (music designed purely to get the audience pumped, musical complexity be damned)
    Pat: God, this music is such buttrock.
    Matt: I know, isn't it awesome?
    Pat: People like to give buttrock a bad rap, but Guilty Gear was pretty good.
  • Pretty much all of their commentary on the Mistral boss fight; both them being hyped for it, and snarking at some of the dialogue bits.
    Mistral: I'm from Algeria, you know? I'm only half-French.
    Pat: Oh I see, they wanted to make a hot brown chick, but they also wanted to make a hot French chick too.
  • During Monsoon's villainous speech, Matt and Pat spend it looking at a guard playing with a random cat, culminating with:
    Pat: I'm sorry I didn't have time to listen to your metaphysical nonsense.
    Matt: I was looking at a cool cat.
  • Pat pointing out that the villains have a tendency to make speeches on human nature and history to compare the heroes to themselves, and wondering if they are aware that "Team Snake" kills everyone who makes that speech ever.
    • And later, Matt commenting "Exactly!" when Jetstream Sam abruptly decides they've both heard enough speeches about higher causes mid-conversation.
  • After cutting off a civilian's clothes, Pat positions Raiden in front of the man, giving the illusion that Raiden is getting a blowjob:
    Pat: This is what I want. This what I want.
    • Followed by a hilarious codec call between Raiden and Wolf.
  • Bayonetta is the cat from the beginning of the game.
  • Pat lampshades the increasing frequency of Matt's completely true facts about their friends:
    Pat: "[Woolie] loves molesting tiny animals?" Is this the path Best Friends will go on to? Slander to a degree that it is nonsensical?
  • Their reactions to the final boss are all hilarious. Special mention goes to when Matt, Pat, and then Raiden react with three consecutive "whats" to Armstrong quoting "I Have a Dream."
    Matt: What?
    Pat: What!?
    Raiden: What...?
    • They make allusions to how the final boss fight looks like something lifted straight from Fist of the North Star.
    • Also, their reaction when the final boss reveals the source of his power. "Nanomachines, son!"
    Pat: (completely deadpan) Fuck off.
    Pat: Hey. Hey Raiden. Why do you think I'm so tough? NAANOMASHEENS....
    • This was after Matt spent the whole game jokingly saying that word every time a plot point came up.
  • During the Credits, they compare Rising to DMC, and both agree that Rising is superior. And in an apparent Call Back to Matt comparing Raiden to Dante in the All Stars video and in the first part of their Rising playthrough.
    Pat: If you had told me five years ago that I would care more about Sunny than Vergil, I would've stabbed you to death.
  • Matt mocking Sundowner's reaction to Raiden hurling a Slider at his helicopter.
    Sundowner: CHRIST!
    Matt [in Sundowner's Southern accent]: Christ! Christ almighty! Ah, six-pound three-ounces baby Jesus!
  • They return to do the Jetstream Sam DLC, bringing Woolie along with them.
    • While fighting Armstrong, Pat is bowled over by the boss charging at him like a meteor. After the second time this happens, everyone decides to use Sam's double jump to avoid it. After a while, the boss charges at them again, and Pat leaps into the air. Armstrong follows them. Everyone freaks out.
    Matt: The jumping plan was for naught!
    • Their reaction to Sam's reaction during Armstrong's Narm Charm transformation.
    • In another section, a huge guard with a large sword stands at the top of a set of stairs, looking out over a railing. Sam rushes up the steps, and then suddenly runs to the left as Pat makes a slight mistake running up the steps. He then runs to the right of the guard, both times standing literally within a hair's distance of the guard. He fails to notice Sam entirely. Then Pat makes Sam run through the door behind the guard, which closes behind him and loads a checkpoint. The trio begin cracking up.
    • Pat attempts to use Sam's taunt to make the Metal Gear Ray mad. It works.
  • Meta example. When listening to Senator Armstrong's speech, Pat interjects with "You know as crazy as he sounds, there's at least 30 people watching this video going, 'Oh my god, I would so vote for that guy!'" 3 guesses as to what the highest-rated comment for that video is.
  • Pat's continued ecstatic reactions to playing as Sam.
    Pat: This...this is playing drugs. This is injecting drugs into my scrotum.
  • The hype train rolls on as they play the Blade Wolf DLC. The three are discussing things as they get used to Blade Wolf, then start practicing with his attacks, ending with a combo move.
    Blade Wolf: Combination complete.
    • And during said DLC mission, they fight Khamsin, and find out that you can stealth attack him.
    (Bladewolf jumps on top of Khamsin's mech and Khamsin looks surprised)
    All Three: YEEEAAAAAHH!
    (Bladewolf proceeds to stab Khamsin right in the chest with his chainsaw tail)
    All Three: OOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
  • The ending of the Blade Wolf DLC, starting out with Woolie trying to imitate George's accent, which leads into a discussion about "spicy condoms" which then immediately segues into everyone getting hyped over the ending credits having Blade Wolf's chainsaw
    Matt: Lemme go get some spicy condoms down at the spicy condom store!
    Ending credits start with shot of Blade Wolf's chainsaw

    Predator: Concrete Jungle 
  • Matt's attempt to get Pat to join him in playing the game failing.
  • Matt and Woolie deciding to name the Elder Predator who exiles the player character "Uncle Phil".
    • They also start referring to the player character Predator as "Jerry", and consider him to be a loser.
  • Matt begins badmouthing a game based on Wanted, when Woolie interjects that he worked on that game... and then agrees with Matt's assessment of Wanted.
  • After messily killing two out of three gang member standing side-by-side with the third one completely oblivious, Matt expresses shock as the third guard is pointing is gun at a boarded up window.
  • Matt mentions offhand that the actress who played Topanga posed for Maxim, and we hear Woolie run out the door to get his laptop.
  • Half-way through the game, Matt & Woolie are told in a mission briefing that they'll have to deal with a gang called "The Matadors", they quickly joke about how they'll probably be some kind of racist carciture given the games track record, and then, almost on cue, the game cuts to the gang. A bunch of Luchadors with a Spaniard Boss named "El Hongo".
    • Noting that commenters had said that "El Hongo" translates to "Mushroom", Matt and Woolie begin a Predator-themed riff on the Badgers song.
  • In Part 8, much to their surprise, the game starts to improve in a flashback sequence. They note how the flashback level is much more visually interesting, better paced, and note how cool the cutscenes involving Bruno Borgia were. They even speak approvingly of Jerry. And then when the flashback ends...
    Matt: Boo!
    Woolie: Fuck you, Future!
  • Early on, they laugh at the fact that the Voodoo gang apparently worships a Scorpion God of Death. In the Flashback sequence, we get this callback:
    Matt (as mobster): Hey man, Bruno's kinda crazy!
    Woolie: Talkin' 'bout givin' birth ta new gods and shit.
    Matt: Hey, there's only one true god, and that's the 1930s Scorpion Death God.
    Woolie: I thought you were gonna say, like, the Red Sox.
  • In part ten, after being told to kill a Brainwashed and Crazy Predator named "Swift-Knife" before he can kill scientists that Jerry has to use to bypass biometric locks, Matt pauses and mentions that the Predators in each of the films has a nickname, reciting the various names of the Predators in Predator, Predator 2, Predators, and the AvP films. As soon as he finishes, the mission failed text appears; as Swift-Knife managed to kill all the scientists.
    Woolie: Thanks for that sterling recap! Too bad it meant...
    Matt: All the scientists were killed before... oh...
    Woolie: We were too busy recapping on Predator names. Jerry was trying to remember all his boys from high school, meanwhile, the Knife was walking around killing scientists.
    • Meanwhile, near the start of Part 10, Matt is desperately searching for the last few guards in a room. Unable to find them, they consult their map, only to find that the last enemy appears to be stuck in a wall. Approaching him to try and attack him, they discover that it is actually a whole squad stuck in the wall on the same spot when they all spring out at once. Woolie's reaction is utter shock.
  • At the end of part twelve, after some bizarre plot revelations regarding the Borgias, Matt and Woolie get immediately hyped up again once MOTHER sics some Xenomorphs on Jerry.
  • The final boss resembling a Caucasian Woolie.
  • At the very end of the play through, we get a call back to the very start.
    Woolie: Now can we play Persona (4 Arena)?
    Mat: No.
    Woolie: Fuuu- *episode jingle*

    Man VS Wild: The Game 
  • In part 5, they take a really good look at the Bear Grylls model's face, and they comment on how off it looks. They mock it by pretending it has a really creepy voice and moving the model so that face is even closer to the camera.
  • Matt mentions how Woolie hates it when they jokingly tell lies about their friends on the show, which Matt claims are "entertaining lies that are based in fact."
    Pat: Like the time Liam burned down that cancer ward. "It's not moe enough, you don't understand!"
    Matt: He wanted to create a real life Katawa Shoujo.
    Pat: (laughing) Oh God, oh that's the worst joke we've ever told on this show! Ever. Oh, oh God, it's true though.
  • In the Patagonia level, Bear Grylls cuts a dead animal's leg off so he has something to "test for hollow ice". Matt then questions this.
    Matt: Why couldn't he just use a stick or something?
    Pat: There's no sticks out here. *pans camera to show trees* Also, ignore that climbing axe on his backpack.
  • They mock the way jumping is handled in the game, with Bear doing an awkward pose and being able to turn the model in the air. They do it repeatedly a few times, pretending that they're doing "sick Tony Hawk combos".
  • They come across a gray fox in Patagonia, and excitedly let him go because he helped him beat Metal Gear.
  • Pretty much every instance of Special Effects Failure in the game, such as Bear's reaction to being attacked by sharks or gators, failing the rafting sequence of the deserted island level, the strange orb (or marble)-shaped debris in Patagonia's avalanche scene and whenever they come across a buggy texture or messed up camera angle.
    • More specifically, while escaping from the deserted island on the raft, they intentionally let themselves get caught by a shark, which starts to, VERY VERY SLOWLY, drain their life meter. After waiting for about a full minute, the raft and Bear lazily rotate upside down before the game over screen appears. The extreme lack of effort by the developers is hilarious, and it's clear that they never expected anyone to actually see it.
  • At one part, a random musical sting starts playing over and over for no apparent reason.
  • Every time Bear Grylls lights a fire, they crack up because his face is directly in the flames.
  • In the Sahara level, they mock the game's poor graphics design when Bear pulls out a camel's insides in one big clump so he can use the "smells worse on the inside" trick to survive a sandstorm. After it's done, they watch the footage of the actual episode and are shocked to find the intestines really did come out in a huge clump like that.

    Silent Hill: Homecoming 
  • Matt has no idea what to do, leading to this absolute gem:
    Matt: What's my objective?
    Matt opens the menu
    Menu: You don't have any objectives.
    Pat: You don't have any objectives!
  • The ending of part 2 has Matt and Pat desperately running around, looking for a save point just so they can stop playing for the day.
  • Matt doesn't understand why or just doesn't want to install Homecoming on his 360:
    Pat: Did you install this?
    Matt: No, why would I?
    Pat: Because it loads faster.
    Matt: Why would I install this?
    Pat: 'Cause it loads faster!
    Matt: But why would I install it?
    Pat: So that it loads faster!
    Matt: But why would I do that?
    Pat: So that it loads faster!
    Matt: Anyway.
  • The complete and utter lack of attempts to hide their contempt for the game is hilarious; Downcoming is perhaps the first game where Pat outright loathes the game and actively continues to recall more reasons why he loathes the game as they progress, and Matt ends up hating the game to the point he refuses to play against the game's end boss. Pat also has quote from members of the development team stating how bad the game is, and the LP is generally populated with their commentary on how grey the game is, how terrible the combat system is, how derivative of earlier games it is, or how bland the characters are, or infinite combinations thereof. Since succeeded by Indigo Prophecy, but surprisingly averted with Deadly Premonition, which both Matt and Pat have stated was a poorly made game, but they clearly loved what it was trying to do.
  • About halfway through Part 4, they find a fire axe buried into the ground in a chasm. Pat immediately declares that this is the fire axe from Downpour and that it had traveled through time to get there.
  • Near the end of Part 5, after traversing for a good twenty minutes looking for photos, Matt finds himself sandwiched between three nurses that stunlock him to death with knife combos.
  • Pat's jaw-droppingly stellar reading of Carol's letter to Sam in Part 5.
  • Pat at multiple points tries to compare Homecoming to Downpour; and almost every time, flubs it and says "Downcoming".
  • The terrible design of the inventory management system causes Matt to accidentally use the super rare serum health items at nearly full health. Twice.
  • In Part 11, they find a bloody message on a wall. Pat decides it sounds like a pop song, and begins to sing it. He finishes the line by jumping up an octave like an old rock ballad.
    • Furthermore towards the end of the episode Matt trolls Pat with his own "ignorance" over where the save point is. The section is infamous for being long and buggy so when it's dragged out even longer (and saving is so important) Pat naturally gets a little upset by it...
    Matt: Where's that save point?
    Pat: It's behi-oh my! Urr-agh-AAAHH! Are you doing this on purpose?!
    Matt: [Where's that save point?]
    Pat: Are you doing this on purpose?
    Matt: [Gotta find that save point...]
    Pat: It's in there!
    (Matt "finds" it and starts saving.)
    Matt: (Beat)...Hey, there it is!
    Pat: Oh, you- you are doing it on purpose...!!
    Matt: You're getting too complacent.
    Pat: I'm gonna die of a fuckin' heart-attack because of this...-!
    Matt: Yaaaaaay!
    (Smash Cut to Title Card)
  • Part 12 reveals Matt's berserk button: Alex somehow washed up on shore after falling in a LAKE!
  • In Part 13, Matt tormenting Pat by ignoring a save point on purpose repeatedly, while Pat shrieks at him to save so they can stop playing the game.
  • Towards the end of the Let's Play, there are comments from viewers stating that they don't have to play the game anymore because it's so bad. However, Pat refuses to give in and insists on beating it.
  • The final boss is so cheap that Pat has to take over while an incredibly frustrated Matt refuses to say anything, resulting in several minutes of Pat awkwardly trying to start jokes and getting nothing but silence.

    Deadly Premonition: The Director's Cut 
  • Matt and Pat discuss how paranoid Pat was a child:
    Matt: You listened to all those PSAs about weird touching in private areas.
    Pat: (as an announcer) "Be careful kids, the homosexual is out there to get you."
    (as himself) "Are you fucking kidding me? From this footage from the fucking 70's?"
    (as the announcer) "Yes."
  • Matt and Pat making fun of a dream sequence:
    Pat: Kids don't require as much oxygen, that's why they're so hard to smother.
    Matt: Oh my god.
    Pat: You gotta really hold that pillow down!
  • Near the end of Part 6, Matt and Pat find Quint's navigation AI having trouble with a staircase and a door. They proceed to laugh their heads off when he slides backwards through the door he just closed.
    • Speaking of glitches, at one point they investigate a house and discover that the doors and windows are glowing green from the outside.
  • Pat is tormented by how terrible the maps are, coupled with the lack of a fast travel option.
  • During a driving section, an entire hillside turns neon green because of the textures failing to load. They don't notice it at first, but when they do, Pat completely freaks out.
  • Pat is dumbstruck by several of the animations, such as York walking away while apparently talking on the phone...without holding any phone.
  • In Part 11, Pat uses a smoke for the first time to make the game skip forward in time. At midnight, the smoke ends, and they find that the sky has turned blood red, there's creepy fog everywhere, and they can hear evil noises. And then they find the Totally OP Beast-Ass Pimp Dog.
  • They discuss the difficulty of referring to Deadly Premonition shorthand because what else the acronym may refer to.
  • "Everyone's dead instantly. Basically everyone you hold dear. Because of Pike."
  • Part 14 has a problem with the placement of Forrest's model during his conversation with York. The result is priceless.
  • The long running saga of Pat trying to break into Quint's house.
    • By the end of it, Pat breaks down in tears.
    • The sequel saga of trying to get into George's house, which manages to waste the entire duration of Episode 17.
  • The discussion of what it's like to be friends with Plague of Gripes:
    Pat: We have Plague on our Facebook so we can talk to him about stuff, and sometimes that comes back to get you when he just starts mass sending people messages about duck penises.
  • The giant dogs return, and they can keep up with the patrol cars.
  • At the midpoint of Part 21, they enjoy watching Carol fail at driving, but completely lose it when Quint decides to go for a drive.
  • Matt and Pat's continuing inability to maintain their composure in the face of the fast-travel car-screeching noise culminates.
  • Part 25 gives us "Woolie The Liar Stole My Pie!".
  • The ongoing 'Big-Butt Jackson' jokes, which come to a climax in one of the recent episodes where they can't actually remember which character is meant to be 'Big-Butt Jackson'.
  • Part 27 has Pat's complete confusion and bewilderment at the fishing minigame.
  • Matt has commonly used a catchphrase "More than you think, but less than you'd hope" or variations on that as a response to jokes. Part 28 of the playthrough blows their mind.
  • By Part 29, it's hilarious just how much Pat in particular seems to veer wildly between seemingly enjoying the game for its quirky story and presentation, and downright despairing each and every time he gets stuck in one of the action segments.
    • The third episode of the podcast actually breaks down into a heated argument between Matt and Pat with Woolie, with Woolie talking about how much he dislikes the game, and Matt and Pat defending it... while going on about all it's problems and how poorly made it is.
  • Pat's stories about his family; An earlier episode details how Pat's Dad once managed to accidentally switch out the paprika he used for his egg sandwiches with Cayenne Pepper, and then sitting through a meal at the dinner table literally suppressing tears. Part 29 ties in with Rustlemania and has Pat's story about eating with his folks and due to wrestling being on the TV, having to advise his Mom that some of her old favourite wrestlers were either dead or drug addicts.
  • A late game segment has the whole town infected by a Hate Plague. The game tells Pat that he has to get through without killing any of the townsfolk. The first thing Pat does? Pull out his machine gun and blast Quint. The results are an immediate Investigation Failed.
    Matt: You fucking stupid idiot!
    • The best part? Pat does it on purpose. He deliberately checks the characters in the crowd, distinctly says "No," when he can't find who he's looking for, and then blows Quint away.
  • The entire conversation near the beginning of Part 18.
  • Almost every single time they use the Fast Travel, as it uses a cartoonish braking sound effect to mark the passage of distance...and they keep forgetting it every single time it turns up and crack up laughing.

    The Last Of Us 
  • In Part 3 Pat and an enemy have the same idea to jump through a window to attack the other one and they both end up clipping through each other at the exact same time.
  • Pat and Matt's conversation about why Ellie is so important leads them to try and out do each other (for anyone wondering it was Matt who was right):
    Pat: So this kid is the cargo?
    Matt: Yeah, no she has the cure in her blood.
    Pat: No she's a baby factory.
    Matt: Wait no, shut up. No she's got a tattoo on her back that shows where land is.
    Pat: Gooooddd, dammit. You fucking asshole. Oh my God.
    Matt: You didn't think I'd get a Water World reference in.
    • This gets a reprise later in the same episode:
    Pat: Okay. I see how this is gonna go. We're supposed to pass her off to a group from another city, and that group is gonna get fucking super-owned...
    Matt: Yeah, 'cause of the tattoo.
    Pat: And then they're gonna be li- God da- God d- God dammit!
    • It gets another reprise in Part 5, done by Pat this time of all people:
    Pat: I should always have a shiv ready, I'm thinking.
    Matt: You wanna have a shiv ready.
    Pat: They're pretty good.
    Mat: That time you spent in prison taught you.
    Pat: Remember that time I met Chris Redfield?
    Matt: Remember when I met Dracula and Chris Redfield?
    Pat: And he had a tattoo of land on his back.
  • Pat's name for the pointless rooms that take up (by his calculations) 30% of the game:
    Pat: Where the fuck am I suppose to go video game? Am I in one of those weird anti-rooms?
    Matt: (laughing) Anti-matter.
    Pat: That's the term we're gonna use now, anti-rooms.
  • Matt's Accidental Innuendo when naming the grunts characters make when they do things after Pat wonders if Ellie followed him, or "effort noises." Pat starts to agree and realizes what he's about to say. He spends the next couple of seconds trying to avoid finishing his sentence while Matt is trying to make him say it.
    Matt: Yeah there she goes. She made, um effort noises.
    Pat: Ah, I hear those. I love those- not going to say that.
  • When asked about the quality of the Uncharted games (sans the second), all Pat can muster is a incredibly high pitched "Eeeeeeehh".
  • In Part 4, Pat throws a brick to distract a clicker, then realizes he threw it right at Ellie.
  • In Part 5 Pat is navigating through a mall that is crawling with Clickers and is listening for their sound to locate them.
    Pat: Why does it sound so close to me- (Pat watches as the Clicker stumbles literally right in front of him) eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
    Matt: Ellie got the fuck out of there.
  • In Part 5, while navigating the same mall Pat tries to count the clickers via listen mode, only for both of them to be scared by Ellie running past the screen.
    Matt: Oh!
    Pat: What the fuck, Ellie!
  • Pat: And than this guy, I'm going to piss him off super bad. (Throws the bottle, bottle bounces off the statue in front of him, clicker screams in his direction) FUCK!!!
    • It gets even better, he immediately runs behind a wardrobe , praying that the clicker won't find him. He then realizes that he's going to have to make a break for it behind the other clicker in the next hallway because the clicker that's near him is about to go around the wardrobe and reach him. The really funny part? He's screaming at the top of his lungs the entire time in a high pitch voice. It has to be heard to be believed.
      • It gets worse for him. Seriously. He managed to successfully get pass the two clicker and is in the room he was trying to reach. Everything is going well until he realizes that he's in the room Ellie and Tess escaped through and needs to go back through the hallway where the second clicker was to reach them.
    Pat: (to a clicker that can't see him) You fuck off. You fuck off. (Throws a bottle at it)
  • While searching a room the boys start to have a conversation about Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
    Matt: Man these noises sound exactly like Tokka from Ninja Turtles II.
    Pat: There, now- You know what, holy shit, holy shit you are so- (trys the door and learns it's locked) Mmmmmmmmhhhhhhhh!
    Matt: (ignoring Pat's fear) I wonder if they hired the same guy who did voice acting for those creatures.
    Pat: GOD. (Beat) DAMMIT.
  • The last minute of Part 5 which ends with a bang. After everything that has happened to him Pat finally gets sick of hiding, completely throws away sneaking, yells "Fuck it," and throws a Molotov cocktail at the clicker in the hallway. While he and Matt are just watching it burn to death the other clicker hears the noise, comes over to investigate and walks into the fire because it's blind and it manages to burn to death too.
    Matt: It's like "What happened Carl?"
  • When Matt points out a picture of a duck, Pat audibly groans because ducks have been ruined for him since his conversation with Plague of Gripes.
  • After the discovery that Bill's boyfriend killed himself after stealing all of Bill's supplies and leaving a note telling Bill that he always hated him Matt and Pat discuss their friendship:
    Matt: I hope that when I die you find a whole bunch of notes from me that say 'Pat you were always garbage.'
    Pat: But that won't hurt my feelings cause I'll have killed you.
  • Matt and Pat simultaneously completely losing their shit over the fact when Bill throws Frank's note away, they can then pick it back up because it exists as a pickup again in the spot Bill threw it.
  • When Ellie gets ahead of Joel in Pittsburgh, this exchange occurs:
    Joel: How about you let me go first. And keep your voice down.
    Matt: Maybe stop singing for one minute
    Pat: Stop practicing whistling.
    Ellie: (Successfully whistles) I'm whistling!
    Pat: I just told you to stop whistling!
  • Pat's repeated deaths to the Bloater in part 13 go from unfortunate, to sad, to absolutely hilarious in short order.
  • Pat gives Ellie the nickname "Garbage". He even uses the name when congratulating her for doing something right.
    • By part 23 they are completely on Ellie's side, cheering for her, telling her she's awesome and congratulating all her kills and stealth... and still calling her Garbage.
  • Part 23 is off to a good start, with Pat failing to kill and dying against a single clicker (At first, the weapon sway on the bow caused him to miss multiple times. Then he had headshot the clicker with the pistol and thought it was dead, as some headbits flew off, but it turned out it was still alive as it quickly lunged toward him.)
    • Later, Pat discovers that Ellie's stealth kill is really loud and attracts the attention of any nearby enemies. Cue him stealthing and running like hell through the rest of the area, which actually proves to be more effective than fighting it out.

    Super Best Friends Watch: Mortal Kombat 9 
Pat: (Imitating Kung Lao) My grandpa was radical! I have a dumb hat!
  • While discussing Raiden:
  • The Shame Car returns. Pat banished Scorpion there after killing Sub-Zero I. He was released to fight Liu Kang, but he smells like Lohan.
  • When talking about Liu Kang and Kitana's relationship, Pat misspeaks and says they will have a hot baby. Matt and Woolie immediately mock him.
    Pat: People will make Pictures! YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME!

    No More Heroes 2 
  • The segment where they play the SHMUP game and they start talking about which is their favorite "berry", until...
    Matt: This is getting weird...
  • Working out Jeane.
    Matt: (watching Travis put Jeane through stretching exercises) THE HYPEST GAMEPLAY ON YOUTUBE!
  • The anime segment.
  • Before every boss fight, Matt and Liam tell Woolie how cool it's going to be. Eventually, Woolie gets frustrated because apparently every boss is cool enough to get them to say that.

    Killer is Dead 
  • The overall enthusiasm from the two of them about the game overall. Sure, it's certainly satisfying to hear the Best Friends rip into something they don't like, but it's so funny hearing Pat get hyped about the game and how well it plays.
  • The suggestions from the two of them that one of the villains looks like Dio from Jojo's Bizarre Adventure, prompting a "Goodbahhhhh Mondooooo!" from Pat at one point.
    • "His son is the pioneer of weird man cleavage"
  • They suggest that this game is essentially a giant Sailor Moon tribute game with Mondo being Tuxedo Mask.
  • Pat tells the story of his German crush:
    Pat: The story is, I had the crush on the German chick, and she was like "ugh." And then I was like "I like you." And she was like "I go back to Germany now." And then she flew away. That's basically the entire story. I gotta keep people up to date- Holy Shit, its a fucking Unicorn!
  • In Part 5, a joke about an "organ filled with blood" goes off the rails once the word "caliber" is mentioned:
    Pat: It's your dick. The joke is that it's your dick.
    Matt: I call my dick "Soul Calibur".
    Pat: *chuckles* I call mine "Soul Edge"
    Matt: It's got a big gross eyeball!
  • Part 12 has Matt and Patt's reactions to the twist in Episode 9: The Giant Who Stole A Planet. It is a cross between Flat "What.", Big WTF, and ClusterFBombs. The whole thing is hilarious.
  • Their reaction to the game's Big Lipped Alligator Moment, a "Please Stand By" image, which is just is hilarious as their reaction.
  • Their suggestion that a new attack in the game be a Power Geyser...only for them to find out that that's exactly what it is.

    Indigo Prophecy 
  • The Best Friends name their save file as "SADNESS" because they feel it's necessary for them to be reminded of how much this game disappointed them.
  • It has been over a year since their Heavy Rain playthrough and the Best Friends' hatred of David Cage has not waned.
  • The title card has "bizness bug needs u to work late" in comic sans along with various other stupid statements.
    • While playing Viewtiful Joe, Matt expresses disappointment that no one commented on the series' title card despite this example being up since they've started playing Indigo Prophecy.
  • Pat's reaction to the effects of accepting Markus's cross mere minutes after discovering that the game has lives.
  • Pat immediately leaving when Tyler's girlfriend asks if he's going to kiss her.
  • The crackup immediately at the beginning of Part 4 as they recall what they named the save file.
  • Right at the beginning of Part 6 they meet Agatha, who seems to bear a resemblance to Madame Web (a character that showed up in Spider-Man frequently in the 90s, including in Spider-Man: The Animated Series). This induces all three of them to engage in super-good impressions of the character (and making fun of plots involving her):

    Woolie: "And now off to find the REAL Mary-Jane!"
    Pat: "The Beyonder thinks you're a shit!"
    Matt: "And the Beyonder is also a shit!"
    Woolie: "Spider-Carnage is so S-tier. You have nothing on him."
    Pat: "I think it would be funny if I made you fight the Juggernaut! Tee-hee-hee-hee-hee!"

  • Upon being given control of pushing a blind elderly woman in a wheelchair, the Best Friends immediately start wheeling her up and down the house, attempt to push her out of the front door, and get stuck in the kitchen.
  • At the end of Part 7, Lucas's apartment starts attacking him after the main villain hypnotizes him again. However, Woolie decides to embrace the madness, and gives the entire long segment hype commentary that makes it a wonder to behold.
  • Matt remaining quiet for most of Part 8 save for yelling at Pat to deliberately fail segments; Pat's irate screeching when he realises that he has to start a segment all over again and yelling at the other two about he's the one having to play it is perfect.
    • The dancing sequence of Part 8 - yet another section both Matt and Woolie goad Pat to fuck up, becomes hilarious with the game's clipping issues; "Mash your head into her fuckin' forehead - they love it."
  • Part 7, opening with Matt's imitation of David Cage, declaring "I made the bad game."
  • In Part 9, we finally reach the part of the game that Pat has been looking forward to, where, according to Pat, "The game shits itself." It is priceless.
  • Part 10 has Pat distinctly avoiding playing the section of the game that takes place in a mental institution in favour of another section; When the game loads the sequence anyway following the completion of a hiding sequence, Pat starts breaking down and wondering whether or not the game saved. He also then begins taking distinct issues, along with Matt and Woolie, at the background and design of the sequence; Knowing what we know about Pat's background and education, the sequence is clearly a genuinely frustrating button presser for him, as he clearly feels that the mentally ill are terribly represented in media - and the others agree - but Pat's trademark rage is still hilarious.
  • Any time they mention the bizarre parallels between the game's plot and Battle Tendency
  • Towards the end of the game, Pat mentions that people have been going back to their Heavy Rain playthough and mining for quotes about Indigo Prophecy, and being surprised that all the things they said which sound like crazy exaggerations are actually true.
    • Matt makes a call back to a joke from earlier in the playthrough, prompting Woolie to begin evangelizing about Coat Mountain.
  • During the finale, Woolie gives an impressive "The Reason You Suck" Speech to David Cage, damning his game for "not even having the balls to be original". Matt and Pat interrupt his tirade with the following:
    Pat: He gets to hang out with Ellen Page all day—
    Matt: —and YOU don't—
    Pat: [cackling] He's falling apart over here!
    Woolie: ...the salt, dude...

    Viewtiful Joe 
  • Liam tells a story where his little sister was taken to see Pooh's Heffalump Movie but The Ring was played instead. Woolie then mentions one theater that showed porn for about eight minutes before it was shut down and sued into oblivion.
  • When talking about Matt's pet snake and rats, they joke that next he should get a mongoose to continue the food chain. They then decide that a bear is the next animal he needs to continue the list.

    Wolf Among Us 
  • When they first meet the Woodsman Matt and Woolie immediately peg him as a dead ringer for Plague of Gripes. Jokes about Plague beating hookers proceed to fly free.
  • Woolie being surprised when the prompt of (Glass Him) meant "Bash the perp's face in with a glass cup" instead of something more diplomatic.
  • The game gives us confirmation that, while Woolie may not be a liar, his morals are just as screwed up as Matt and Pat say.
  • Matt and Woolie's reaction to Bigby's hairy chested Shirtless Scene.
    Matt: I am in love!
    Woolie: My eyes are up here Snow.
  • "People change when they get Boners." Woolie, noting how Snow's Stalker with a Crush went insane with love.
  • Colin of the three little pigs manages to ruin a romantic moment between Bigby and Snow and Woolie does not respond favorably:
    Woolie: PEACE OUT PIG! God! Read the fucking room!
  • Matt and Woolie, discussing the Crooked Man's eye issues, fondly remember the tale of "The Melted Face Man" .
  • Woolie's fondness for short-haired girls extends even to the serial-killing Bloody Mary. In the final episode, Matt comments on how a fan has told them something in this episode may change his feelings on the matter. Bloody Mary soon reveals her true form - a blood-stained ghoul impaled with broken glass and covered with occult symbols. Woolie thinks for a while, then decides he's okay with it (despite the risk of cuts).

    Beyond Two Souls 
  • Similar to what they did to HeavyRain, the Season 7 Machinima episode of this game is basically parts 1 and 2 of this playthrough.
  • The return of James Small in part 2.
    James Small/British Matt: Is this a Codemasters game? Cause if it's not, you can fuck off the edge of my dick!
  • This gem from part 4:
    Matt: Woolie's ruined at least seven Christmases and saved four.
  • Pat's overly endearing, weirdly fatherly and brilliantly timed "Hey, Champ!" as Doctor Dawkins following Jodie and Aiden taking revenge for the former's incredibly poor treatment at the party.
    • Also at said party, their maniacal glee over the "Revenge" prompt.
  • Whenever the characters say monsters, Matt replaces it with Monstars.
  • Part 5 has two in quick succession when they finally get to the Condenser. One is Woolie's assertion of "Don't send me in that room, I'm gonna get fucked up!" and then Pat screaming "IS THAT THE EYE OF SAURON?!" when he sees the Condenser.
  • The trio's sheer bewildered excitement upon being given the prompt to jump off the bridge in part 6.
    Matt: [simultaneously] Jump!?
    Pat: [simultaneously] JUUUUUUUUUMP!
    Woolie: [simultaneously] YOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
    • And afterward, when Aiden stops her from falling.
    Matt: So what, is she Fortune?!
    • Meanwhile, Jodie rants to Aiden in an incredibly Tear Jerker speech about why Aiden should just let her go...and Matt immediately lampshades that it would be really sad if they didn't have to constantly jump around Jodie's life and had some clearer context.
  • Pat's dedication to having Jodie make the worst decisions possible, to see how bad David Cage's story gets. Best example occurs with the guy behind the alley in part 6.
    [Jodie gets on her knees]
    Pat: No way! NO WAY!
    Matt: NoooOOOOOOOO!!!!
    Woolie: OH MY GOD!
    Matt: What did you THINK was gonna happen, ya fuckin' putzes?!
    Pat: I thought it was gonna STOP at this point!
  • Part 7 gives us the greatest "Woolie & Pat can be friends" moment, when Pat reveals he doesn't know how birth works:
    Pat: [high-pitched squealing] OH MY GOD!
    Woolie/Pat: [squeals/gibberish]
    Matt: [deadpan] Guys, you're supposed to feel emotions about the miracle of life right now...
    • Matt theorizes that the newborn baby will have David Cage's face modeled onto it. Cue more of Pat's squealing laughter.
  • Sometimes the simplest things are the most funny. Following Jodie's hobo-ventures, she escapes from the hospital after her coma. When the next scene opens on the side of a road, the camera, for some inane reason is fixated on a sign that says "Caution: Bears, Next 10 miles", even though it ends up having nothing to do with the scene.
    *all laugh*
    Matt: Okay, now this might start getting cool.
  • In Part 8, the introduction of Angsty Teen Punk Jodie and how it completely wins Woolie over.
    • In Part 9, Jay completely wins over Matt, and to a lesser extent, Woolie and Pat.
  • This conversation in Part 9:
    Pat: Okay, so I- I want to clearly point out that these guys are clearly are not the same actors who were saying that other dialogue.
    Matt: What?
    Pat: They brought in some different Native American dudes and have them do separate lines-
    Woolie: -and then dropped it in the middle of the English conversation.
    Pat: Assassin's Creed III was the worst about that.
    Woolie: No, it wasn't. They actually were the same people.
    Pat: They were?
    Woolie: Yes.
    Pat: But it sounded different.
    Woolie: No, they were the same.
    Pat: Well, now I'm an asshole!
    Woolie: You are.
    Pat: Aw shit!
  • Their constant attempts to give the game a chance while it throws stuff that they find completely asinine is hilarious.
  • "No, no. His leather jacket used to be a horse. And then he asked, 'oh leather jacket, teach me your secrets'."
  • The section during Part 7 with Tuesday's baby, I believe, where Matt starts to lose all interest and just starts shrieking the Muppet Babies theme.
  • In Part 10, Shimashani (the hitherto-silent Navajo grandmother) yells for her family to let Jodie fight a malevolent entity. As another character opens his mouth, Woolie jokingly blurts out "You can talk?!" The character says exactly that.
  • The fact that the game has become so predictable by Part 12 that the gang actually call the fact that the bloodied ghosts haunting a young Jodie are, in fact, the daughter and wife of Professor Dawkins.
    • In the same video, they confirm the guess they had made several videos before about the event that led to her being hunted (sent in to kill an African warlord). They even remind themselves of this prediction during the loading screen, right before Jodie is given a picture of the warlord during her briefing cutscene. Matt, Pat and Woolie are beside themselves.
  • The ceaseless desire to play Phantom Pain, based on the fact that aspects of the Navajo portions of the game (i.e. riding on a horse in a large desert environment) keep reminding them of it; In more than one episode, they've suddenly burst into "WORDS THAT KILL!!!".
  • In Part 12, Pat runs out from cover and hurtles straight into the first guard in the sequence. Pat dashes around in front of him for a bit before managing to hide. The guard, believing game overs are a failure of the game designer, does nothing at all.
    • The full repercussions of the "no game overs" design doesn't hit them until later in the video, when they are actually caught by a guard with an assault rifle at point blank range. Instead of shooting, he tries to melee Jodie, triggering a quicktime event.
    Matt: What the fuck just happened? Wait... wait, you can't fail, I forgot!
    Pat: You know why? Do you know why?
    Woolie: Because...
    Pat: [mumbled] gameoversareafailureofgamedesign.
    Woolie: There ya go.
    Pat: Wow, ALL of the tension just evaporated.
  • In Part 13, Kanye West is possessed by spirits and forced to go on a shooting rampage in Africa.
    • And in a moment provided by the game itself, Ryan trying to deny he lied to Jodie while a TV next to him is playing a broadcast that proves he did.
  • The best friends encountering the underwater Chinese ghost base in Part 15.
  • In Part 16, a critical plot-heavy moment gets interrupted when Woolie's controller dies. Everything said during the three and a half minutes as Pat desperately tries to recharge it is hilarious.
  • Part 16:
    Woolie: You know that feeling when you're seven hours into a movie?
    Pat: Yeah. I've had that feeling two times now.
  • The final part has the game basically forcing Jodie to kiss Ryan as the final scenes with the Black Sun approach. Needless to say, Pat - who has done everything to avoid Jodie getting together with Ryan at that point, completely and utterly rejecting him - is not particularly amused as the game basically confirms his usual complaint of the choices in a Cage 'game' being meaningless. Their ultimate decision to remain in the Infraworld was, among other reasons, intended to be a final trolling / "screw you" to Ryan.
    Pat: This is the sickest break-up ever!

    Disaster: Day of Crisis 
  • In part 2, Matt and Pat begin discussing how gnarly (and not in a cool way) Woolie is, leading them to come up with the next Woolie meme: Woolie the Ent!
  • Part 3 has them discussing how they're sell-outs, remarking how ridiculous it is to say that when they're doing a Disaster playthrough, and then Matt takes shots at a number of other Let's Players for their playthrough of the Dead Space 3 demo.
  • Pat has some difficulties with driving the car in Part 9.
  • Any time Iris shows up, Pat is immediately reminded of the Narm found in Mega Man X4, since a lot of it revolves around the character named Iris.
  • An out of nowhere Yogi Bear impression in Part 10 when a bear shows up. Yogi is quite upbeat about how much he wants to eat Ray.
    • 'Yogi' returns in Part 11, only to have his effectiveness as a boss encounter utterly, hilariously nerfed - just like every other boss fight in the game - thanks to the enhancements the duo have put into Ray's ridiculously cool handgun.
  • Pat's story in Part 14 about his ex-girlfriend "jolting him into consciousness" by punching him in the face while he was sleeping, because she had a dream where he cheated on her.
  • Every time Matt goes to kick open a box or barrel and fire pops out is hilarious. This comes to a head where it still happens when the box is completely submerged in water, during a hurricane.
  • Pat spends the endgame incredulous at the Gameplay Roulette and Ending Fatigue, as Matt has to remind him that the game isn't over yet. Then Matt solves some minigame only for Pat to think it's which an all new game element is introduced.
  • When they get a game over during the "disarm the nuke" section, Pat's utterly flabbergasted reaction to Ray giving his standard death groan from a nuclear explosion.
  • Their reaction to The Stinger.

    Yakuza 4 
  • In Part 0, Pat revealing that his dad apparently looks a lot like an old Japanese guy from Yakuza 3.
  • Pat making a Doge-style joke in Part 2.
    So discreet. Much secret. Wow.
  • Part 4 has Pat showing Matt the numerous mini games that the game has to offer. And then we have the inevitable introduction of Pachinko, which Pat claims is "sorcery". The sheer bewilderment that both players show throughout the duration of the game is just glorious.
  • Matt's seeming inability to get the "2spooky" meme down right.
    Matt: Man, this is 4yakuza5me.
    Pat: ...shouldn't that be 4yakuza8me?
  • Any reference to Super Chunk and her sybian vibro-stool.
  • In Part 12, Akiyama bumps into Mack, who teaches about Revelations. Suddenly, a Panty Thief practices Le Parkour across some rooftops, misses a jump, tries to use a bra as a Grappling-Hook Pistol, fails and falls three stories in slow motion. Matt is Dumb Struck and mumbles that this had better not result in a new attack. 5 seconds later, Akiyama learns the Triple Strike, based on the panty thief's jumps.
  • In Part 14, Matt loses it when they find a Japanese analogue of Doc Brown in the Kamurocho underground.
  • Also in Part 14, a random battle rewards Pat with a Large Blow-Up Doll. Given that they were just talking with one of the hostesses on how to improve their technique, the turn of the conversation becomes all too obvious:
    Matt: Use it when I get back to the club.
    Pat: Use it when I get back to the office!
    Matt: No, no, no! Dress it up at the club and then charge people to talk to it!
    *both laugh*
    Pat: "You're so reserved!"
    Matt: "I love how elegant you are! You're so buoyant!"
    And later, when coaching Lily...
    Pat: Get out there. Converse like you've never conversed before!
    Matt: Look, the blow-up doll's really rising up the ranks! You gotta outdo her!
    Pat: You will be replaced.
    *Matt loses it*
    Matt: Ah, Blow-Up Doll! I'm not even calling her a name! It's just "Blow-Up Doll"! "Blow-Up Doll-san!"
    *Pat loses it*
  • The first revelation scene of Saejima.
    (Saejima pulls out carving wood and slams it on the ground and starts working on it)
    Matt: Oh my god...oh, I thought he was gonna do some Naruto shit and turn into another piece of woo-
    Pat: Wait for it...wait for it!
    (Saejima lifts up his wooden statue, which has him attacking an enemy. Matt and Pat lose it.)
    Pat: Look at this move! Look at it!
    (Saejima lifts an enemy up in the air and clotheslines them as they come down. It hits so hard that the enemy does a flip in mid air, which Saejima uses to his advantage by slamming them back into the ground.)
    Matt: Holy shit...oh my god! (Pat laughs in the background)
  • During Tanimura's campaign, the two see a disgusting old man get shot in the back by his supposed ally, being told You Have Outlived Your Usefulness. The guys remark on how it really sucks with that happens, as if they have personal experience and have survived such events.
    Pat: I am super paranoid that Liam is just gonna stab me!
    Matt: And be like "you have outlived your usefulness!"
    Pat: NOOOOOOOO! I helped build this channel!
    Matt: And then you write Liam's name in blood and I walk in and go "Oh shit... Woolie!"
    Pat: Yeah, Liam just covers up the A and the M with rubble and writes Wool in front of it.
  • In the beginning of episode 29, the duo get off topic and Matt starts suddenly doing an Irish stereotype.
    Matt: *In an Irish accent* Oh Charles. My son Morpheus. Someone put a bomb in his potato.
    Pat: *Starts cracking up*
  • In episode 37, while doing a baseball minigame, Matt accidentally refers to baseball as "faceball". Pat calls him on it, as well as the running gag of Matt bringing up Face/Off.
    • Later in the episode, Pat shows off the golfing minigame, picks the club with the longest range, and declares that "No one can shoot as good as me!" as he tees off. As soon as he finishes, his shot ends up landing in a water hazard. He soon gives up after landing in a bunker on Hole 3, wherein Matt suddenly gets the mental image of Kiryu storming off in a huff at his poor performance and wonders just how confused the in-game audience would be at this sight.
  • In the finale, Kiryu's finishing blow to Daigo was a final 'Kick to the Balls'. The way he drops down in defeat is described by Pat to be like a 'sack of boners'.

    I Have No Mouth and I Must Scream 
  • The duo's escalating comments about how AM is pretty much using the group's tortures as a way to "get off".
    Woolie: "I have no dick and I must fap!"
  • Pat is speechless in Part 3 when Benny inexplicably grows a third arm to shake the mutant child's hand.
    • What's better is that Pat queries whether or not that's a glitch. Woolie quite blatantly tells him no.
  • In part 4 when the Devil character nonchalantly states that AM has taken over Hell, the duo goes on about how cool it would be in AM actually did take over Heaven and Hell, even if these claims are false.
  • Pat's constant bafflement at the sassy-ness of Ellen, which he finds implausible given the century of torture the characters have been through.
  • Pat sums up, from personal experience, what being salutatorian means:
    Woolie: Oh, so if you're too shit-tier to be the valedictorian—
    Pat: Yeah, pretty much. That was me... I wasn't in any clubs and I hated everyone.
  • An amazingly dark example: Pat reacts to Ellen's as-of-yet-unexplained fear of the color yellow by naming one of his saves "Yellow is Boners", which Woolie (who's played the game before) says was probably not a good idea. Later in the level, we find out Ellen's fear comes from repressed memories of a man dressed in yellow locking her in an elevator then raping her, and Pat suddenly gets what Woolie was talking about.
    Pat: Yellow really is boners! I was right!
    Woolie: (trying not to laugh) You were... you kind of nailed it.
    • After the encounter, Woolie mentions what would have happened if Pat hadn't picked the "fight back" option.
    Woolie: You pick the wrong action at the end there—
    Pat: I did?
    Woolie: No, I'm saying if you do...
    Pat: Yeah?
    Woolie: Yeah... actually.
    Pat: Oh...kay, never playing this again.
    • Then Pat tries to name his next save "Yellow is No Longer Boners" but runs out of room.
  • Pat, starts Gorrister's story off by making several decisions without heeding Woolie's warnings. Most of them don't really matter but...
    • To sum the episode up, Pat electrocutes a bunch of helpless animals, eats bread covered in rat shit, and finally stabs open the gas bag of the airship he is on and shoots it, with less-than-desirable results.
  • It gets better in part 10, where Pat has to choose between healing the Big Bad of Gorrister's scenario, or Gorrister's wife. Pat chooses to save the Big Bad, screwing himself out of the good ending for Gorrister and subsequently the game. Woolie's reaction is priceless. Pat wisely takes Woolie's advice and reloads his save in part 11.
  • Pat tying Edna up and shoving her in his pocket.
    • He later does the same thing with Glynis' corpse.
  • When they get to Nimdok's scenario, Pat enters an operation room with a child strapped to a gurney, and an assistant scientist sent to oversee the "operation." Pat's immediate reaction is to calmly save the game, grab a scalpel and stab the assistant as Woolie starts laughing about how he didn't even seem to consider any other option.
    Woolie: You went right for it!
  • Heading into the finale, Pat names the save file Attack On AM, getting Woolie really hyped.

    Pokémon LeafGreen Nuzlocke 
  • Woolie adds an additional rule for their Nuzlocke run: When in doubt, they must name things after either hip-hop or professional wrestling. As such, they end up naming the protagonist "DMX", and after asking who the opposite of DMX is, name the rival "Ja Rule".
    • As a subtle one, the first major task in the game is for DMX to deliver a parcel from Oak to a nearby Pokemart. X GONNA GIVE IT TO YA, FUCK WAITIN FOR YOU TO GET IT ON YOUR OWN, X GON' DELIVER TO YA.
  • Matt's pretty damn good impression of DMX's 'aaugh' yell.
  • Woolie's consistent referring to DMX as Dog Master X, and Matt always trying to tell him that the DM stands for Dark Man.
  • Woolie's running gag of saying that DMX's money can handle their problems, and Matt reminding him that DMX has no money these days.
  • When beginning the game, they're confronted with the expository tutorial text, ending with this:
    On-screen text reads "Press A to begin your adventure!"
  • Shortly after beginning:
    Woolie: This is so exciting, we never know when it might end for us!
    Matt: I hope it ends in five minutes.
  • Remembering the famous Squirtle Squad and its leader's Cool Shades, they name their Squirtle "Kamina".
  • Part 1 ends with the group heading to Route 23 in hopes of capturing a Mankey. A Rattata shows up instead, but due to the double clause rule they're able to try again to capture the next Mon to show up. Woolie asks for all the fans to raise their hands in hope. A Mankey shows up, the group gets hype, and the video ends on a cliffhanger.
  • After catching a Mankey, Woolie goes back to grind. Cut to Mankey getting reduced to 1 HP by a critical from the first Ratatta they encounter.
  • Matt's constant insistence to use Tackle at all times in battle, even though Bubble would be better due to it having STAB (Same Type Attack Bonus) on Squirtle.
    • Likewise, when Kamina (a Squirtle) goes up against a Pikachu, Liam goes through the math in his head to decide if it's worth a turn to use Withdraw and figuring it is—not realizing that Pikachu only had one attack (Thundershock), which Withdraw did nothing against because it was a special attack rather than a physical one.
  • As of episode 5, DMX has a full six man squad. These six are Kamina, Fandango, Ghostface, Chyna, Lil'Jon, and Ludacris. Can anyone say dream team?
  • It seems that Machop is the reaper of joy for this playthrough. So far he's killed Wyclef in episode 9, and Jigga in Episode 11. Even worse because they CAUGHT Jigga in the very same episode.
  • In episode 14, Liam points out in retrospect that when they released Fandango after his death, they accidentally sang him off with the I Dream of Jeannie theme, rather than Fandango's own music. When the revelation dawns on Matt and Woolie, they suitably freak out, as it proves that Fandango could never get his due, even in death. Doubles as a Tear Jerker in a way.
  • Episode 20 introduces Ultimate Warrior the Ghastly (They recorded shortly after he passed), the suggestion and Woolie going through with it made Matt and Liam laugh and cringe in equal parts.
    • On the same Episode, Woolie prepares to fight and capture a wild Ghastly or Haunter with Ghostface's Quick Attack, to which Liam sarcastically responds with "Yeah Quick Attack will work great." while holding in his contained laughter. When Woolie catches on Liam's comment, he changes his tactic to Kamina's Bite, which nets the same response as before from Liam.
  • As per the result in the poll for a new Nuzlocke rule, they can no longer run from battles starting with Episode 21. This new restriction was hardly an issue as they had never run from a single battle anyways. However, a Paras in the Safari Zone nearly caused what Liam joked as "the end of the playthrough" as it positively refused to flee despite Woolie throwing rock after rock at it.
  • In part 28, when facing against one of the four Rocket brothers, Liam imitates him with a deadpan "You only found me because I'm the slowest of the Coward Brothers", causing the other two to lose their shit.
  • After defeating Blaine, Woolie runs into Bill, who asks him to help out with something. "Something" turns out to be the Sevii Islands sidequest, which Woolie had no idea about due to it not being in the original games. Cue ten minutes of trying to escape the islands via boat and flying, only to find out they couldn't leave until a couple of sidequests were done. The guide they have even tells them that they'll be there for a while, much to Woolie and Matt's frustration.
  • Due to Woolie skipping a fight in the early game on Route 23, he gets to fight Ja Rule Pre-Elite Four. After getting himself all worked up for the fight, even naming that part of the stream "Time to Murder Ja Rule", he goes onto Route 23, only to find nothing there. About after a minute of checking around, he realises he forgot to fight Giovanni.
  • Only ten seconds into his appearance on the Nuzlocke Live Stream, and Pat was already driving Woolie up the walls by being... Pat.
  • As it turns out, relying on the guide wouldn't have been a good idea anyway, as every enemy they fight after Ja Rule on Route 23 seems to use different Pokémon at different levels than what it tells them. Woolie went into the Elite Four under the impression the first member would have a Level 60+ team.
  • The guys are applauding the team at the Hall of Fame screen when we get this last joke in:
    Woolie: Luda's looking down from above.
    Pat: So's Cool J
    Woolie: (Dismissive) Yeah, him too.

    Resident Evil 4 HD 
  • The thumbnail used for the videos. It has to be seen to be believed.
  • The fact that the Two Best Friends Wiki has a section devoted to all of Pat's failures after he bragged about playing the game multiple times and probably not going to die
    Pat: Did you see those dirtbags started a wiki article about every time I fuck up!?
    • The funnier part of that article is the section below the deaths which lists every single treasure that he managed to miss along with the exact sell price, reminding you of how many pesetas Pat missed out on and how much more money he could have had for upgrades. The total? 148,000.
  • Like Resident Evil 2, Pat knows this game inside out, so he runs around trivializing encounters while sarcastically yelling "OH NO!" everytime he blows away a group of enemies.
  • In Part 3, Matt and Pat start talking about Leon's melee attack and how it evolves into a Suplex. Matt mentions that he always wanted to suplex a priest, and Pat points out that this was the only reason he went to church.
    Pat: No, I gotta-I gotta save him! OH NO, I suplexed him!
    • This continued into Part 8, where Pat wishes religion and wrestling were closer, such as churches featuring live displays of priests "pile-driving a dummy of Satan". Matt is confused that Pat's church didn't have this.
  • In Part 4, Pat talks about how, in the Mercenary Kings video, everyone said he sounded like PlagueOfGripes before he went nuts.
    Pat: So I talked to Plague about this, and he was like, "Ok, here's the test: draw a butt, and if you get an erection, you may have a problem."
  • In Part 7, the first Garrador of the game has a little trouble finding Leon.
  • Part 8 is a comedy of errors. In the infamous 'water room', Pat accidentally shoots Ashley twice. He then spends around a full minute trying to kill a single Novistador (invisible bug things) in close quarters.
    • Pat runs into "an awesome bug" he is familiar with: if you shoot an enemy's head off just before they initiate a grapple they will continue to grapple you while missing their head, and only die once you break the grapple (even if they're not one of the mooks that live on by sprouting a plaga from their head).
  • In Part 10, Pat reveals that he has trouble with sliding tile puzzles and always stopped to look up a FAQ on how to complete the one in Ashley's playable section. After he gets some tips, he fares much better.
    Pat: Somebody has told me a pro-tip, which will hopefully solve the puzzle for me.
    (Pat finishes the puzzle just as he completes his sentence)
    Pat: Holy shit.
    Matt: (laughs) What an a-what an amazingly hard puzzle!
    Pat: Wow, I feel like an idiot now.
    Matt: When it comes down like that? Yeah.
    Pat: Oh god.
  • In Part 11, Pat sells the Elegant Mask with two jewels under the assumption that he missed his chance to get the third one. He finds said third jewel in the next room. To top it off, he also gets attacked by a snake (when Matt had previously said that not being bitten would excuse all of his mistakes in the playthrough).
    • Lightning strikes twice in Part 16, where Pat sells a half-completed cat figurine. The final piece to complete the set (and double the value of the figurine) is in the same room as the salesman. Pat doesn't find the piece, either.
  • Part 12 opens with Pat's "fixing" an upside-down grenade in his attaché case after repeated complaints by turning sideways.
    Pat: What a mature response to comments!
    • Part 13 continues the trend.
      Pat: [laughs] I've turned into my father. I just realized that.
    • Part 14 gives us the moment when they finally actually address the going out of their way to transfer the magnum to the right side of the attache case while moving grenades and herbs around willy-nilly.
      Pat: Now why'd I come in here? Oh right, to heal myself. See, that's one of those moments when you realize "Oh man, I'm an asshole."
    • Part 16 has him finally stop messing with the attache case. Why, you might ask? Because before the episode even starts, Pat fucks up the contents of the case, only to get killed almost immediately, resetting the case and undoing his changes.
    • Pat's dickery all came to a close in Part 19 where he sold all of his grenades and even his rifle to afford the magnum exclusive in preparation for the final boss. Left with only three guns and some healing items, he finally ordered everything together on left...except for the scope which he forgot to sell and just shoved in the bottom right corner.
      Pat: I have been fighting my OCD this entire game. And today, I have deci- Oh, I still have the thermal. Ah, fuck it. Who gives a shit? Who's gonna stop me? No one.
      Matt: Well, people could.
      Pat: Is everyone happy now?
      Matt: It still looks like crap.
  • Everything about the giant statue room in part 13, from Matt and Pat discussing the thought process behind building a "giant 3-foot tall statue", to the spawned enemies facing the wrong way, to Leon's animation clipping when he jumps on the statue's hands.
  • In Part 14, Pat hides behind a corner to shoot at one of the armored militia ganado
    Pat: Back up just a little bit and he's gonna be all "hey what's up g-" [shoots him]
    (Pat turns away to take care of two more ganado before turning back and seeing the armored ganado standing in the same spot)
    Pat: Wow! You are just bad at your job!
    Matt: That armor doesn't make up for the smarts, I guess.
  • In Part 15, they finally find Ashley behind a door while she pounds on it. Knowing that it's locked, Pat continues onward without bothering to interact with her. They then discuss the hilarity of Ashley seeing her savior only to have him continue past her without saying a word. Later, once they return with the key, Pat manages to completely walk by her room again by accident.
  • Part 16 has Pat remember the existence of "Database" and go nuts at Matt having forgotten about it.
  • Part 18 features Pat repeatedly getting blown to pieces from the skies by 'friendly' helicopter pilot Mike. Eventually the duo express confusion about how in the PC version Mike apparently waits for you to get near something before blowing it up.
  • Less than ten minutes into part 20 (Separate Ways), Pat finds an Elegant Mask, immediately sells it, and finds two of the three gems required to complete it within the next five minutes.
  • Also in part 20, Matt goes from talking about the 1990 Re-release of Night of the Living Dead to discussing City Avenging Bats to accidentally expressing his real thoughts on the Nuzlocke playthrough out loud within seconds.
    Matt: They get revenge for their dead parents.
    Pat: No they don't, they just go "Eh, I'm a bat!"
    Matt:Ah, I'm a Zubat! [Under his breath] Oh God, I'm gonna have to do more nuzlocke at some point...
    Pat: Oh Yeeaaah! Yeah that's audible, people can hear that shit! No walking back on that now!
  • Pat then remembers that a chainsaw-wielding lady that he encounters will give him a good item if he kills her. He stuns her with a headshot, then kicks her off of the catwalk they're on into the water below them. Not to mention when he tried to kill her with a grenade, which fell through the slats of wood and into the water.
    Matt: Well, you fucked that up. Look down, maybe it's flashing in the water.
    Pat: No, I'm not even... because I know you're right.

     Barkley Shut Up and Jam Gaiden 
  • Pat and Liam's hysterical reaction to the game over screen in Part 1.
  • Part 2 sees the two encounter a sliding tile puzzle. Pat hands the controls to an eager Liam and sits back.
    Pat: Alright, Liam. Let's see if your tiny brain... you can totally do it.
    (Liam begins shuffling through the pieces quickly.)
    Pat: ...but the way you're doing it, at this speed, makes it seem like you totally—
    (Before Pat can finish his sentence, the puzzle's completed. Total time: 9 seconds.)
    Liam: (bashfully) I'm really good at these puzzles.
  • Their reactions to a lot of the game's script can be seen as this, as the game lampoons common phrases from weeaboo and furry groups. Pat and Liam will often take a moment to give the game credit for how detailed the script is.
  • From Part 5:
    Pat: Yeah, fate— no, don't say F.A.T.E. with all periods and shit.
    Liam: No, it's a thing.
    Pat: Okay. Well.
    Liam: It's a thing. It stands for Fairly Abstract... Time... Eeeeeh.
  • In episode 7 they take a moment to reflect on how good they are as a team while playing, then take it a step further and conspire on how they're going to kill Matt and Woolie so the show will be only them.
  • In Part 8, Hoopz getting shot with Type-2 Diabetes by Jordan.
    • Also, the rare, one-of-a-kind item that you can only get by giving the F.I.N.A.L. G.U.N. to the random NPC named Mark. It's a completely useless "Gun's Sticker" labeled 1 of 1, in crayon, that says I LOVE GUN'S.
    Barkley: What.
  • In Part 11, they use the whistle that takes the party into the B-Ball Dimension and expect Zelda music to play. Pat and Liam listen to the music, are silent for a few seconds, then lose their shit when they recognize it as "Sweet Georgia Brown".
  • Just about the entirety of the finale, particularly the Stunned Silence to Shadow Barkley's final form.

    Dark Souls II 
  • Pat explaining how most player "figure out" the series's Jigsaw Puzzle Plots.
    1. You go through the game and read all the item descriptions because you think it's going to help you.
    2. Beat the Final Boss and go "What? I don't get it."
    3. Play it again... and still don't get it.
    4. 2-6 months after release, listen to VaatiVidya or EpicNameBro explain the plot.
    5. Go through it again and go "OOOOOH!"
    6. Be a condescending prick to people on podcasts so people think you're super smart.
  • Literally thirty seconds after gaining control of the player character, Woolie manages to find an item Pat always missed:
    Pat: Wow!
    Woolie: (laughing) Are you serious?
    Pat: Wow! Three trips—like ugh, no four... six trips through this area... never found that thing.

    Murdered: Soul Suspect 
  • Liam and Woolie did QA for the game, so naturally every single problem with the game, from minor stuttering to an awkwardly worded sentence, is greeted with an anguished cry of "Thanks Woolie/Liam!"
  • When shout outs go too far: After entering the police station, Matt and Pat find an enormous poster of Just Cause 2 right in the main hallway. Right after, they find a cop pretending to work at a computer with the Deus Ex: Human Revolution main menu on it. Then they find the same menu on half the computers in the precinct! They lose it.

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