- The terms of service were updated again January 2014 with more.
- This image◊ (currently serving as the page image for Tumblr's main page on TV Tropes), detailing a day in the life of a hipster, with replacement lyrics sung to the tune of Kesha's "TiK ToK".
- This beauty about how many different types of orange juice with various levels of pulp are sold, including:
"Holy Shit, That's A Lot Of Pulp"
"Seriously. There’s A Lot Of Pulp In This Motherfucker."
"Stop Fucking With Me. Who Would Want This Much Pulp?"
"I'm Not Fucking With You. There’s So Much God Damned Pulp In This Sumbitch That You Should Forget A Straw Because You’ll Need A Fucking Ladle."
- Possibly one of the best things about Tumblr isn't on the site itself, but on Twitter; David Karp (known as The Creator) and his account. His tweets include his growing infuriation at being called 'Daddy' by Tumblr users and trolling people by suggesting the site will be down for maintenance.
- You Can't Fuck Osmosis Jones is a blog dedicated to explaining why it's impossible to have sex with various obscure cartoon characters in a very exasperated tone.
- This completely epic post about what is really the most powerful Pokémon.
- The week leading up to Maintenance Day was hilarious.
- After the mantinence update was over, the update itself and everyone's reaction to it was summed up pretty accurately with a gif from Monsters, Inc..
Various monsters and Mike recoiling and ducking in preperation for an explosion
Cue a tiny/insignificant (and contained) explosion
- Every single response by Francieum.
- People on Tumblr will reblog anything:
"IT’S A TRANSPARENT HASHBROWN, HOW DOES IT NOT HAVE MORE NOTES?"
- This hilarious post about how to speak Canadian, and how not to.
"In Canada, you don’t say ‘I love you’. You say ‘EH EH MAPLE LEAF QUEEN HAM BACON MOOSE ANTLER EH’ which roughly translates into ‘I’ll give you my snow shovel.’ I think that’s beautiful."
"“HOCKEY HOCKEY MAPLE LEAF PUCK.”
"what the fuck did you just say about my mom"
- There was an image going around on Tumblr where, based on your initials, you'd choose two words to be your "wolf name." Unfortunately, some poor sap had the initials "PW," and...
MY NAME, IS FRICKIN MOON MOON. I’D BE THE MOST RETARDED WOLF. ‘OH SHIT WHO BROUGHT FUCKING MOON MOON ALONG?’
- And the rest is history.
- A later one making the rounds had a Call-Back to this. "What is your Assassin Name", and someone got 'Bloody Blood'. "And this is my pet wolf, Moon Moon."
- Any post of a Brit or an American asking about and comparing between each other's cultures, and the responses that follow.
- Everything from E3 Week.
- Especially following the reveal of the new Super Smash Bros. game, in which they decided the Villager character was a cold-blooded murderer; along with the Wii Fit Trainer.
"I like you...I'll kill you last."
"I honestly can't tell which one is speaking."
- Any of the posts regarding Leonardo DiCaprio and his lack of Oscars.
(an image of people in gold lame full-body suits dancing)
"I bet this is what Leo sees in his nightmares."
- This gem about Hugh Jackman playing Gaston on Broadway.
- The man who was physically removed from an Olive Garden for eating too many "unlimited" breaddsticks.
"How many did you eat?"
- A trampoline that doubles as a tent for summer camp-outs? Doesn't take long for someone to imagine the kind of sex to be had on it (and the inevitable "There are two kinds of people" post). But someone follows up with "If you ever wanted to eat someone you could start a fire under it and slow-roast them!"
"...three. Three types of people."
- Someone painted the map of England (on paper) using tea. It's immediately called the most English thing they've ever seen. Until about ten seconds later, when the title is quickly given to someone who replied to it, "What a waste of tea."
- Take On Me.
- Someone who doesn't buy into the whole Illuminati-666-devil BS decides to look up just what it means: The Illuminati (plural of Latin illuminatus, "enlightened") is a name given to several groups, both real and fictitious. Historically, the name refers to the Bavarian Illuminati, an Enlightenment-era secret society founded on May 1, 1776 to oppose superstition, prejudice, religious influence over public life, abuses of state power, and to support women's education and gender equality. Faced with this knowledge, the user can let out only a weak, defeated "oh."
"Next time on I Didn't Know I was a Member of the Illuminati"
"Plot twist: Tumblr is literally the Illuminati"
"am I in a cult?"
- Johnny Bravo: I'm sickened, but curious...
"The Internet in a nutshell"
- One Tumblr user, when reminiscing about The Magic School Bus, thought about how Miss Frizzle got her students to go on so many field trips... "and then [they] remembered Whitest Kids U’ Know...."
- Many people had different reactions to the trailer to Avengers: Age of Ultron. One person had an... interesting one.
- "This generation has a nice looking plane movie While our generation found entertainment through this manufactured horror." While that in and of itself is funny, one particular comment makes this hysterical:
- This unusually extremely polite argument. Here's a transcript:
nasturbate: ahh yes the basketball. males 12+ only. nice
drunktrophywife: Except there’s a difference between men’s basketballs and women’s basketballs because women have smaller hands women’s balls have a smaller diameter while men have larger hands and their basketballs have larger diameters
nasturbate: yo ok what she said my bad
cashemoji: That was the most mature dispute I have ever seen on the internet
sittingatthetypewriter: Tumblr, you’ve done it.
buttcheekpalmkang: They have men’s basketballs, women’s basketballs, and youth sized basketballs. Just like they have different sized footballs for different ages.
blueivysedges: Equality does not mean everyone gets the same thing because we are all inherently different. Equality is recognizing differences and making sure everyone gets the same opportunity based on those differences, which isn’t always “equal”.
zulubunsen: A MATURE ARGUMENT ON TUMBLR
I LIKE IT
disneyprincessoflyrian: REBLOG THIS, YOU MAY NEVER SEE A DISPUTE THIS CALM AGAIN
- Here, have people weighing in on Spy Kids 2.
: hOLD THE FUCK UP spy kids two is supposed to be a light hearted film for the whole family not make me have an existential crisis
: I bet Steve
fucking said this to himself and didn’t realise the cameras were rolling and the director was just like “keep it”
- A discussion about Thomas the Tank Engine's copious amount of Nightmare Fuel ends on this rather appropriate note:
- Tumblr user roach (likely) exploiting an error in a site update, and managing to tag every single user. Cue baffled reactions from the rest of the website.
roach: how's everyone doin tonight i just broke tumblr
- Someone made a post depicting Pixar and Marvel parallels. It's fine until the bonus parallel with Dory saying "I don't want to forget"... right by Bucky about to undergo a mindwipe.
trufflupogus: THAT LAST ONE WAS UNCALLED FOR
- This post using Long-Haired Hare and Baton Bunny gifs to describe mind-blowing sex. It is so wrong but so good.
- A post concerning a fight between Scooby-Doo and Courage the Cowardly Dog gets increasingly dark until one person added a rather appropriate picture to it:
- A hypothetical post concerning a Tumblr cartoon blogger in 1973 backfires somewhat:
: It’s true fuck Fred
- A discussion about an alternative casting choice for Jay Gatsby:
ollivander: what the fuck kind of mutant ass pun bullshit is this
- After a discussion about trains:
- The Driliad.
- Ask and ye shall recieve:
- "It’s like the studio who makes the Pokemon anime doesn’t know how to draw Groudon"
- "SHIT I JUST REALIZED IT’S GILBERT GOTTFRIED"
- Behold, a two-part reaction to a major character death. Saying anything else would ruin the joke.
- A while back, Vice created an article concerning food hacks at the office. It got a very different kind of reaction than expected.
: This should be what nsfw
- "Stock photos are a gift to the internet"
ansgar-amergin: What in the actual fuck
- A discussion about coffee naming goes from good to great when:
- Doubling as a CMOA, but after the KFC Twitter got into some trouble:
- The fact that an Imagine Your Icon post about making your icon watch Teen Titans Go, and that they make you watch The Powerpuff Girls Reboot in return, is tagged as "angst" and "tragedy".
- A simple post combining Yu-Gi-Oh! and the "When You X Just Right" meme eventually turns into a full-blown crossover.
- Hats really do make the man.
- An ex-art student decides to explore her old art supply bag from when she was a student at The Art Institute of Seattle. Hilarity Ensues.
- "I can’t believe communismkills just resurrected sonic-for-real-justice"
- Behold, a discussion on Batman.
- A discourse on "swims".
- HOW ABOUT I JUST DON'T PLAY — The story of a music student whose sheet music has pppp notation (P meaning "piano", which means "soft/quiet"). Which then flies Off the Rails with four words: [COLOSSAL FOG HORN NOISE].
- Adding to the audacity, a piece by Julius Fučík called "Florentiner Marsch" which has first FFFFFFFF...and then FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF. "That's 24 fortes who the fuck does that."
- A summarization of 2016:
- When shitpost generators get too real.
- A possible backstory for the title screen song of the NES Pictionary game:
nintendo: hey tim we’re making a dumb pictionary game and need some music
tim follin: >:)
nintendo guy calling tim follin: hey bud, have you... have you ever played pictionary?
- A simple misunderstanding
christophertrees: I’m looking for ppl to shoot, if you’re in or visiting NYC, please let me know if something can be arranged.
earthshakinlove: I live in Staten Island please come kill me please
earthshakinlove: Oh shit I just read ya tags you talkin bout photography 👀 ma bad
- An episode of "What's New Scooby-Doo?" had an unintended side effect.
- "this is the plot to cabin in the woods"
- On the subject of unusual instruments
"What do you play?"
"The clarinet. You?" I play the fucking HAMMER
I like how the brass guy knew it was coming while the bass clarinet still gets caught off guard
- Every so often, a post gets so popular that the site can't even display the 'notes' count. This, of course, leads to many more likes and reblogs of "OMG, we broke Tumblr!!!1!!!"
- Whenever a picture is very misinterpreted and ends up getting a ton of reblogs before someone steps in with the truth. Some of the most silliest are someone mistaking someone turning◊ into a zombie as someone's brain releasing endorphin as they die and someone mistaking◊ the Joker disguising himself as a cop by removing his makeup as a real cop with facial scars.
- Oh, look, a GIF of Rowlet walking set to music, ain't that nifty?
- Some have claimed asexuals are immune to the allure of sirens, believing that their songs would not appeal to their lack of sexuality. However, sirens don't specifically sing about sex (necessarily). They sing to sailors about what they most desire. In the case of Odysseus, they tempted him with knowledge of the future.
kittyknowsthings: Do you think the sirens would be grateful that they finally get some variety?
systlin: "Oh my god we can finally just sing about pasta thank the fucking gods."
totohoy: I'm not asexual but I’m fairly certain sirens would do a far better job luring me into the depths with a song about pasta rather than sex...
musicalhell: This is true; Odysseus heard them promising him knowledge of the future. So the next time you see artwork like this: Remember those sultry naked chicks are saying "We'll tell you the winning lotto numbers."
i-am-the-karkat-media-worldwide: Them: "We have unlimited wifi at incredible speeds~" Me: *diving headfirst into the water*
waiting4codot: "Away with you!" I exclaimed, swinging an oar toward the unyielding siren. "Oh, but we have anything you could ever want," she cooed. I shook my head. "I want for nothing! There is nothing you could offer me!" The siren paused for a moment. "Dank Memes," she said, "The Dankest Memes you co—" Her sentence was cut short by my epic cannonball into the water.
- "these are so much funnier when you remember that he always carried a gun on set"
- Autocorrect ruins another post.
- This post involves someone pointing out that pulling the “If everyone would just” card doesn't solve anything. Someone else decided to add their two cents.
: If your solution to some problem relies on “If everyone would just…” then you do not have a solution. Everyone is not going to just. At not
time in the history of the universe has everyone just, and they’re not going to start now. chroniclesofrettek
: If everyone would just think about this before suggesting solutions, Facebook would be a lot better
- How human culture came up with FEASTING and FASTING.
- #Can someone add the Hannah barbera stumbling sfx
astrobstrd: @themightymightybosstones Your wish has been granted against my better judgment
- "this is the last time you make a fool of me in my own house god damnit"
- A post about a film.
- facts-I-just-made-up and metalheadadam get into an argument about helicopters.
- MiniJenn, creator of Universe Falls, and her epic rant about Rudolph and Frosty's Christmas in July.
This was a real fuckin thing that came out in 1979 and its exactly what you fucking think it is.
- "Does Mario ride you like a horse, or like a car?"
- In a fit of guerrilla writing, Marvel fans come up with a workaround to defeating Thanos in the new Infinity Wars movie...
: Where is the Soul Stone?! Dr. Strange
: You'll never find it; it's sealed here, in this puppy. Thanos
: HA! (kills puppy)
Was that your plan? Dr. Strange
: Wait for it... John Wick
: Hey guys, have any of you seen my new dog? Thanos
: O_O Dr. Strange
: (high-fives a reluctant Tony Stark)