This beauty about how many different types of orange juice with various levels of pulp are sold, including:
"Holy Shit, That's A Lot Of Pulp"
"Seriously. There’s A Lot Of Pulp In This Motherfucker."
"Stop Fucking With Me. Who Would Want This Much Pulp?"
"I'm Not Fucking With You. There’s So Much God Damned Pulp In This Sumbitch That You Should Forget A Straw Because You’ll Need A Fucking Ladle."
Possibly one of the best things about Tumblr isn't on the site itself, but on Twitter; David Karp (known as The Creator) and his account. His tweets include his growing infuriation at being called 'Daddy' by Tumblr users and trolling people by suggesting the site will be down for maintenance.
This completely epic post about what is really the most powerful Pokémon.
A trampoline that doubles as a tent for summer camp-outs? Doesn't take long for someone to imagine the kind of sex to be had on it (and the inevitable "There are two kinds of people" post). But someone follows up with "If you ever wanted to eat someone you could start a fire under it and slow-roast them!"
"...three. Three types of people."
Someone painted the map of England (on paper) using tea. It's immediately called the most English thing they've ever seen. Until about ten seconds later, when the title is quickly given to someone who replied to it, "What a waste of tea."
Someone who doesn't buy into the whole Illuminati-666-devil BS decides to look up just what it means: The Illuminati (plural of Latin illuminatus, "enlightened") is a name given to several groups, both real and fictitious. Historically, the name refers to the Bavarian Illuminati, an Enlightenment-era secret society founded on May 1, 1776 to oppose superstition, prejudice, religious influence over public life, abuses of state power, and to support women's education and gender equality. Faced with this knowledge, the user can let out only a weak, defeated "oh."
"Next time on I Didn't Know I was a Member of the Illuminati"