Funny: Tintin

From the comics:

  • Some of Thompson and Thomson's slapstick moments qualify; in the first episode, they step through the cabin door of a ship and one of them bashes his head on the top of the door frame — the first mate tells them to mind their head, and the other responds with "Mind my head, of course.", ducks ... and trips over.
    • At one point, a photo of them falling down the steps in an attempt to apprehend the criminal is used in a newspaper article about the event, complete with Comically Serious caption.
    • The Thompsons' crowning moment has to be their Outdated Outfit appearance in The Blue Lotus.
    "Don't look now, but I think we're being followed."
    • The entire sequence in Destination Moon where they think there's a live skeleton walking around the complex. So they arrest and handcuff the skeleton in a doctor's office. The doctor is not amused.
    • Thompson and Thomson have wrongfully captured Tintin. The latter escape and handcuffed them both to one another. As they chase Tintin, the handcuffs get caught in a lamppost and they slam straight into each other.
  • The bit from Red Rackham's Treasure where Thompson and Thomson try to help with navigating. After reading the coordinates they give him, Captain Haddock tells them to remove their hats and pray. They do, and enquire why. The reason? "According to these coordinates, gentlemen, we are currently standing inside Westminster Abbey!"
  • Whenever Captain Haddock loses his temper.
    • The time he doesn't lose his temper, and is faced with a reporter from the newspaper that had leaked their treasure hunting intentions. Instead of chewing the man out, he asks that he interview his secretary: Professor Calculus.
    • When Calculus is discovered aboard the ship, leading to the Who's on First? exchange culminating in "Separate pieces? My whiskey is in separate pieces?"
    • And when Haddock does lose his temper, some wonderfully creative insults are on their way.
    Mountebanks! Bashi-bazouks! ICONOCLASTS!!
  • The Truth Serum-induced Eviler Than Thou bit in Flight 714. It was also even funnier in the animated adaptation where after Haddock tapes their mouth shut, he says "I'M the baddest." Tintin then says that this will make an interesting story.
  • Pick a moment involving Professor Calculus. Any moment.
    Haddock: But we are in Jakarta!
    Calculus: Really? I could have sworn we were in Jakarta...
  • The bit in Destination Moon after Captain Haddock refers to Calculus as a "goat":
    Calculus: (while crashing a jeep through a guard outpost) MAKE WAY FOR THE GOAT!!
  • In a conversation with Calculus in Tintin and the Picaros, Tintin and Haddock repeatedly end sentences with words that sound like "sister", leading Calculus to get increasingly annoyed: "And for heaven's sake would you stop talking about my sister!" He then thinks for a moment and remembers that he doesn't have a sister, before storming off in a huff anyway.
  • Snowy tried to steal a dinosaur bone from a museum in King Ottokar's Sceptre.
    • In the same comic, Tintin and Snowy had to hitch a ride with Bianca Castafiore to the Syldavian capital, and she decided to "treat" them to her music.
  • The Sticking Plaster Running Gag in The Calculus affair.
  • The Castafiore Emerald has so many in the form of Running Gags and Brick jokes.
    • The step never being fixed until the end...wherin it is completely destroyed again.
      • The mason shown as being lazy.
    • "Helloooo! I can hear you!"("Allo! J'écou-ou-oute!")
    • "MERCY! MY JEWELS!"("CIEL! MES BIJOUX!")
    • "No, sorry this is not Cutts the Butcher".("Non, Monsieur/Madame, ce n'est pas la Boucherie Sanzot!")
    • This one isn't a running gag, but there's something hilarious about the Paris-Flash tabloid proclaiming the betrothement of Haddock and Castafiore. One of the photos shows Haddock scowling murderously at Iago the parrot, accompanied by the placid caption "He opens his heart to the parrot she gave him."
    • After putting up with Iago imitating Bianca Castifiore he tells it to change the record after she's gone, whereupon it scares him by bellowing "BILLIONS OF BLUE BLISTERING BARNACLES, SHUT UP WHEN I'M TALKING!" in his face.
    • The remarkably surreal scene where Calculus' attempt at color television.
  • From Red Sea Sharks:
    • Castafiore comes to greet the rescued Tintin, Haddock and Skut. Haddock's (perfectly serious, slightly panicky) reaction: "Do we get back on the raft?", followed by this dialogue: "Ah, and Captain..." "Harrock, madam. Captain Harrock'n'roll!"
    • One moment has Müller in command of a military base, tasking some aeroplanes to eliminate the convoy Tintin and Haddock are travelling with. Müller then says that armored trucks are on their way, and reiterates that Tintin's convoy need to be wiped out. The pilot commander, who is kind of an idiot, orders his planes to eliminate the armored trucks. Müller congratulates the commander on his excellent job, then as soon as he hangs up, realises what has happened. It can be assumed that the commander is dealt with.
    • When what turns out to be a slave trader boards the ship (thinking Hadddock is the regular captain), Haddock kicks him off the ship and continues yelling his trademark insults after him, until Tintin points out the slaver is out of hearing range. Haddock then gets a megaphone and continues to rain insults until definitely out of range.
  • From The Calculus Affair: Tintin and Haddock are chasing after a kidnapped Professor Calculus. A friendly Italian driver offers his help by driving insanely quickly and dangerously after them. Then a policeman pulls them over:
    Policeman: Are you insane? I'm writing you up for this! What's your name?
    Policeman: (sweating bullets) Er, just don't do it again, will you?
    The Italian zooms off.
    Italian: Now we catch up on the time we missed!
  • In one comic, Haddock's in the bath when the phone rings. He has the detachable shower head in his hand, and mistakenly puts it up to his ear instead.
  • Tintin, Haddock and Snowy getting drunk off wine fumes in The Crab with the Golden Claws:
    Haddock: (chasing a villain) Blackamoor! Anthracite! Coconut! Fuzzy-wuzzy! Cannibal!
    Tintin: Go on! Seek! Seek! Bite him!
  • A bit of Black Comedy at the end of Picaros, when Tintin gets the favor he asked of Alcazar for his help: That nobody, not Tapioca's troops, not his ministers, not even Tapioca, be shot. Made particularly hilarious by Tapioca begging that they spare him the horrible fate of being spared. He and Alcazar share a moment when they comment on these idealistic young people, what is the world coming to...
  • When the group's tent is blown away in Tintin in Tibet, they hear the yeti roar, then a crunch, and next we see it squealing in pain, having run into (and denting) a boulder.
    • Haddock's Unstoppable Rage on seeing his whiskey bottle drained by the yeti.
    • Also his freak out when he thinks Bianca Castafiore is in the next tent (It's actually the radio.)
    Haddock: Bianca Castafiore! She's HERE by thunder! That woman follows us to the ends of the Earth!
  • There's a Running Gag in Secret of the Unicorn where Thomson and Thompson keep getting their wallets lifted. Eventually they decide to secure their wallets with elastic bands, which results in a bit of slapstick when the pickpocket shows up later in the story. Later, they are amazed that their wallets haven't been stolen, despite said wallets being on a chain (predicting, by coincidence, a minor fad in the 1990s). Finally, they pay the pickpocket responsible a visit, and a search of the thief's collection (he's a kleptomaniac who hasn't actually taken the contents of the wallets for his own use, and in fact feels some guilt over it all) reveals an entire shelf of their wallets.

From the cartoons

  • In Nelvana's Animated Adaptation of The Land of Black Gold, after Abdullah tricks Dr. Müller into crashing his car into the sand, he points a (toy) gun at Dr. Müller, as the car smolders in the background, and demands...ice cream.
  • From "The Crab With The Golden Claws":
    Thomson and Thompson: (together) We think you're smuggling drugs!
    Omar Ben Salaad: BY THE BEARD OF THE PROPHET-
    Ben Salaad's henchman, Allan, emerges from a hidden bookcase entrance leading to their opium cellar, and proceeds to crush Ben Salaad behind the bookcase in the process
    Allan: RUN FOR IT, OMAR!
  • The scene in The Castafiore Emerald where Professor Calculus' color TV undergoes glitches during a demonstration translated pretty well to animation. They also added a gag in which either Thomson or Thompson discloses that they brought the gypsies' monkey in for interrogation, but he hasn't answered any of their questions.
  • This little bit from "The Cigars of the Pharaoh".
    Tintin: I don't like cupcakes!

From the radio dramas:

  • From Tintin in Tibet:
    Haddock: I'm not going [to Kathmandu]! And when I say "no", I mean "no"!
    Cut to:
    Haddock: So. We're in Kathmandu.