- The charming Mr. Potter (the town drunk) as he gets ready to go and join the posse who have gone after the stage robbers.
Mr. Potter: Ain't cha gonna help catch 'em?Ben Wade: Ah, wish I could.Mr. Potter: What'd they look like?Ben Wade: Oh, they'll be easy to catch. That's three big men on three white horses.Mr. Potter: ...Three white fellas... on three big horses, huh?
- "Safe! Who knows what's safe? I knew a man dropped dead from lookin' at his wife. My own grandmother fought the Indians for sixty years... then choked to death on lemon pie. Do I have two volunteers?"
- Charlie Prince starts a conversation with the proprietor/bartender in the lobby of the hotel where they're holding Wade. The pair's conversation unknowingly drifts into some Dark Humor.
Prince: I might as well go along. She won't come now.Hotel Proprietor: Who was you plannin' to meet?Prince: My wife, she ran off with a travelin' man.Hotel Proprietor: She did?Prince: That's why I've been sittin' up all night. I figgered he'd bring her here.Hotel Proprietor: Well, whaddaya know? Mine ran off, too. I wonder why they do that.Prince: I don't know. I've always treated mine alright, never hit her too hard.
Funny / 3:10 to Yuma