Raoul confesses something he learned while eavesdropping on Christine for the second time. To paraphrase, a very annoyed Christine asks, "You were listening at my door again?", and (to further paraphrase) Raoul answers, "Of course not — I was hiding in your closet."
Richard's and Moncharmin's attempts to catch the Phantom the night he extorts his second payment, which includes walking backwards all night and the crazy incident with the safety pin that makes the poor secretary Remy think his bosses have lost their minds.
When Richard and Moncharmin suspect that Mme. Giry has been stealing the envelopes of money, she reveals that she actually slipped it back into Richard's pocket when he was not aware. They ask her to demonstrate how she would have done this, and so she takes the envelope and immediately heads for the doornote exactly as she would have normally done, since she would not have returned the envelope to Richard until a later time, prompting an "Oh, no, you don't!" reaction from the two managers as they scramble to stop her from leaving with the money.
Erik's sarcastic letters to the managers near the beginning, particularly the names he calls the other performers.
A creepy, ugly-looking man with a false nose turns up at the old managers' retirement dinner. All of the unnerved diners in his vicinity are doing their best to ignore him—don't want to be rude, surely if he's here he must be somebody's friend—when he dramatically announces to the outgoing managers (paraphrased): "You know, I don't think Joseph Buquet's death was natural." The narrator himself denies that this figure could have been the Opera ghost, because nobody is that audacious.
Mme. Giry is missing, having been locked in the manager's office. When asked where she is, the whole time with her loudly asking someone to let her out, the managers sarcastically ask, "Do you think we ate her?"
Piangi attempting to scale the mechanical elephant in the "Hannibal" scene.
In some productions, when Lefevre is trying to get people to pay attention to the announcement of his retirement, he's fails and eventually has to beg Madame Giry for help. She bangs her stick once, and there is instant silence.
Carlotta's diva rant shortly thereafter ("'These things do happen'? You've been here five minutes, what do you know?!").
I happen to find nearly everything Carlotta says or does to be so over-the-top that she is one of my favorite Characters That Don't Matter Much in The End. Especially her aforementioned rant after Hannibal, especially how it was done in the film: "For the past three years these things do happen? And do you stop them from happening? No! And you two! you are as bad as him! 'These things do happen?' Ma, hmph! Until you stop these things from happening THIS THING-" *points at self dramatically* "-DOES NOT HAPPEN! UBALDO! ANDIAMO! BRING MY DOGGY AND MY BOXY. Now you see, bye bye, I'm leaving!"
When the Phantom finishes singing 'Music of the Night', he proudly unveils a life size mannequin...that happens to look exactly like Christine, and is wearing a wedding dress. That would be bad enough (and it's pretty clear that Christine doesn't know what the hell to think of this) but then the frigging thing comes to life, jerks out towards her and causes her to faint. Whether she ends up in his arms or on the floor, Erik's reaction generally seems to be 'Whoops, didn't intend for that to happen.'
Actually, just the fact that he has a life size doll that looks like Christine, all done up in a wedding dress, in the first place - when it's not being creepy. What's the deal with that thing anyway? It's never explained.
The escalating chaos of 'Notes', where everyone is bursting in and accusing everyone else of things they didn't do. One can imagine the Phantom spying on the resultant mess and having a good laugh at their expense.
Madame Giry: "Please, monsieur - another note."
Everyone Else:: *Collective groan*
This little bit in the song "Notes/Prima Donna". "And what is it that I'm meant to have wrote?" Beat "Written."
It doesn't come across very well on the original cast recording (or the movie, unfortunately), but the managers can be absolutely sidesplitting in the right hands. Firmin Deadpan Snarking his lines in "Prima Donna" or Andre fumbling his way through the "ballet from Act Three" speech are among the many delights Those Two Guys bring to the show.
The 25th's managers. Everything they do is incredibly funny in a suitably subtle way, with the two actors engaging in some very rapid line switches between each other. Not to mention 'Prima Donna', an entire song devoted to satisfying her ego.
Firmin and Andre:
Who'd believe a diva happy to relieve
A chorus girl who's gone and slept with the patron?
Raoul and the soubrette, entwined in love's duet!
Although he may demur, he must have been with her!
You'd never get away with all this in a play,
but if it's loudly sung and in a foreign tongue
It's just the sort of story audiences adore, in fact a perfect opera!
"The role of the pageboy is silent, which makes my casting, in a word... ideal."
Michael Crawford's delivery of that line on the London cast album is delightful. And just try not to smile a few minutes later when he spoils Carlotta's performance and accentuates it with a wonderful Evil Laugh.
Ramin Karimloo can also give Crawford a run for his money with his laugh.
Most of the Phantom's funniest moments are actually when he's offstage; he's a savagely witty Deadpan Snarker who just loves insulting people via his little notes.
The very long low note done by the old cuckold in "Il Muto".
The low note has, by now, actually earned the cuckold his own round of applause in most theatres.
Kind of darkly funny, but this exchange during the "Don Juan Triumphant" rehearsal never fails to amuse me:
Carlotta:(re: Piangi's incorrect singing of the score) His way is better; at least he makes it sound like music!
Mme. Giry: Signora, would you speak that way in the presence of the composer?
Carlotta: The composer is not here! And if he were—
Mme. Giry: Are you certain of that, Signora?
*cue massive Oh Crap! take into the flies from everyone onstage*
And when Carlotta sits back down and Piangi tries to sing his lines again, everyone huddles in close, fast as lightening, to hear him get it right. The pressure does not help.
The 25th Anniversary's version of this scene has a couple of gems. First is Piangi's line: "If you can call this sh—gibberish art!" And, second of all, La Carlotta parades around the scene wearing a hat that looks like an enormous Jammie Dodger on her head.
In addition, there is the Phantom himself. At first he appears to be perfectly cultured and civilised, but after Raoul and Christine get together he starts to break down into a goofy Card-Carrying Villain. First there was the Masquerade, where he interrupts wearing, um, this◊. Then the mask comes off (which...wasn't a terribly good idea after what happened last time), and, well, he tries to make Christine marry him. Really, he'd have grown an Evil Moustache by that point if if wasn't for, y'know◊...
Depending on the actor, the Phantom can be hilarious during the early bits of the Final Lair scene. Particularly if he's sitting on his throne and giggling half the time...
It's cruel, yes, but it's also quite funny to see the Phantom clearly getting all hot and bothered when Christine starts her bit in 'Point of No Return' - trembling hands, clasping knees, the works - plus she gives him a taste of his own medicine when she starts running her hands all over him!
It's certainly a Tear Jerker and a Crowning Moment of Heartwarming and so on...but honestly, the Phantom's bug-eyed shock when Christine kisses him in the Final Lair scene is kind of funny as well. (I know, I know, I have no soul...)
This◊ expression on Carlotta's face at the end of the 25th Anniversary's rendition of "Prima Donna", after the Phantom has made his threats about "A disaster beyond your imagination!!!" Doubles as a CMOA for someone who, up until now, has so far been a Joke Character.
A video of one of the 25th Anniversary celebrations shows four Phantoms (Ramin Karimloo, Petter Joback, John Owen Jones, and at-the-time current Phantom Hugh Panaro) singing the title song to Sierra Boggess. She gives each one her attention as they sing their individual lines, and each one maintains chemistry with her, with Ramin Karimloo (who starred opposite Sierra in Love Never Dies and the 25th Anniversary Albert Hall production of Phantom) seeming to be trying to out-chemistry the others. One commenter described it as "the classiest pissing contest" she had ever seen.
One of the casts released this song as part of a Christmas Broadway benefit. It's a retelling of "The Twelve Days of Christmas" using different items from the show: "Six geese-a-laying" becomes "Lot 666, a chandelier in pieces," etc. What makes it hilarious is that the actors gradually change the song; for instance, the two actresses who play Christine (a Mythology Gag: it's tradition for two different women to play the part, as it's too demanding for one actress to do multiple shows a week) argue over who will do what performances, with their understudy repeatedly butting in to take part in the conversation; the Phantom describes his mask as "a sweaty piece of porcelain on my face" and tells the Christines that "they have to kiss the funny lip thing" he wears; the Carlotta sings "Five high Ds" with an example every time, only for the Christines to show her up by singing an "E" instead (she exhaustedly tells them to shut up); the corps de ballet girls badly sing as they call themselves "eight tone-deaf dancers"; and Raoul brags that he gets to kiss both Christines. It's hilarious.
When the Phantom remarks "Our Don Juan must lose some weight" some Piangis can react hilariously, ranging from looking very offended to putting down something they're eating to smile like they just weren't doing that to sobbing dramatically.
From the Arthur Kopit/Maury Yeston musical, we have the Phantom's initial reaction on hearing Carlotta (in this version a Dreadful Musician who only gets leads because her husband is the manager):