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  • The Merovingian gets this priceless line:
    The Merovingian: I have sampled every language, French is my favourite - fantastic language, especially to curse with. Nom de Dieu de putain de bordel de merde de saloperies de connards d'enculé de ta mère. It's like wiping your arse with silk, I love it.
    • If you don't know French, plugging his French phrase into Google Translate and discovering what he's actually saying is... enlightening: "Damn damn fucking shit fucking assholes to motherfucker". Translating each component literally, it means "Name of God of a shitty whorehouse of slutty idiots screwing their mother's assholes."
    • He uses this line twice: First just to show off, then later, when he discovers Persephone's little betrayal, as an actual expletive!
    • The Merovingian showing off his theory regarding choice by illustrating a program he's written: a piece of cake laced with signals that causes the eater to have an orgasm, complete with a Matrix Raining Code zoom between the woman's legs as it goes off.
  • This exchange between Persephone and the Merovingian.
    Persephone: Where are you going?
    Merovingian: Please, ma cherie, I have told you. We are all victims of causality. I drank too much wine, I must take a piss.
  • Persephone telling the mook that The Merovingian is in the ladies room.
    • Trinity's less-than-enthusastic reaction to Persephone's trade of information for a lover's kiss.
    Persephone: Just a sample.
    Trinity: *whips out gun* How would you like to sample this?
    Morpheus: Trinity!
    Trinity: *puts down gun*
    • The Merovingian's Angrish-bordering French rant when he learns of Persephone's betrayal, then denies he's wearing lipstick from the woman he was just with.
    Persephone: She wasn't kissing your face, my love.
  • And then when Neo stops the hail of bullets from his henchmen:
    Merovingian: Okay, you have some skill.
  • When Neo curb-stomps the Merovingian's mooks.
    Merovingian: Goddammit, woman, you will be ze end of me.
    • The sheer, unspoken irony of his "You see? He's just a man" definitely counts. He says this after Neo sustains a wound that makes him bleed... neatly overlooking the fact that he got it by blocking a swinging sword with the edge of his bare hand!
  • The countless many Smiths Neo fights is just hilarious in itself. The fact that they multiply in numbers makes it even more hilarious. It also demonstrates that the franchise became cartoonish. Pretty much "Seinfeld"ian.
  • Smith's face after the back-alley brawl between Neo and the dozens of Smiths. Hugo Weaving's many faces of disappointment have to be seen to be believed. And each and every one of them is guaranteed to make you lose your shit laughing.
    • The fact that they, after the above, all look at each other and start dispersing in a "Nothing to do here." kinda way.
    • One of the Smith clones is twitching his nose, as if he'd taken a particularly hard punch to it.
      • Also during the actual brawl, when Neo is thrown into a crowd of Smith's he knocks them over to the sound of dominoes falling. Later when he does the same to a Smith, they fall down to the sound of bowling pins being hit.
  • Link, when Neo gets transported to a different location in The Matrix when trying to escape the Merovingian's stronghold:
    (Neo opens door to find he's in a mountain range and calls Link for his location)
    Link: You're not gonna believe this, you're all the way up in the mountains.
    Neo: Really?
    • Link's frustration at not being able to keep track of the team whenever they pass through one of the "hack doors" in the Merovingian's stronghold gets progressively funnier as he grows more and more exasperated.
      Link: Not Again...
  • The Architect's endless TVs show all possible futures. At one point, they show endless variations of Neo Flipping the Bird, insulting him, threatening to beat him up, etc. that are hilarious for the sheer image of the famously stoic Keanu Reeves raging and cursing like a sailor. A few minutes later, they simultaneously scream, "BULLSHIT!" Some of the individual footage was included on a DVD extra.
    Neo: Others? How many? Answer me. Five ones? Bullshit. There were five ones before me. You can't control me! I'll smash you to fucking bits! YOU'RE FUCKING DEAD! FUCK YOU! I'll fucking kill you! I can say whatever I want! You can't make me do that! You old, white, prick!
  • Link's wonderful suppressed dirty words when he see Dozer's children in the room with Zee.
    Link: (to Zee) "Where's my puss... (sees the little kids) Heyyy......"
  • Trinity starts asking Link for a program to wire a motorcycle... and the Keymaker gives her the key for the cycle before Link can even finish sending it over.
    Trinity: You are handy.
  • The Twins' almost-bored Casual Danger Dialogue during the action sequences: "We are getting aggravated." "Yes we are."
    Twin: (to his other counterpart while getting his arm shot over and over) Can we move along?
  • During the back-alley brawl, an Agent enters the simulation to fight Neo and the rampaging Smiths, only to be stopped by another Smith. We then get this priceless exchange:
    Agent: ...You.
    Smith: Yes, me.
    The Smith sticks his hand into the Agent's chest and starts to infect him
    Smith: Me, me, me.
    The Agent finishes transforming into a Smith and looks at the other Smith
    Smith 2: Me, too.
    • When Smith infects Bane.
      Bane: Oh, God.
      Smith: Smith will suffice.
      • Then he fixes the new Smith-Clone's tie casually.
      Clone: Thank you.
      Smith: My pleasure.
  • When Neo says he isn't surprised to see Smith, he guesses that Neo is aware of 'it'. 'It', he explains with a cocked eyebrow like it should be obvious, is their connection. In some translations it's even funnier because it outright sounds like "our relationship".
  • Also the sing-song tone in which Smith says "I was compelled to stay, compelled to dis-o-bey" sounds like a diva's Obsession Song quoted by a teenage girl.
  • When Smith starts repeating "because of you" at Neo, it's hard not to imagine him breaking into a musical number singing Kelly Clarkson's eponymous song. Bonus in that the lyrics contain the phrase "I watched you die", which Smith also mentions.
  • An unintentional example: when Neo meets the Architect, the former asks: "Why am I here?," to which the Architect explains that Neo is a recurring anomaly in the programming of the Matrix, whose code results in him meeting the Architect every several generations. In other words: the Architect explains what Neo is and how they came to meet; but not why they are meeting. However, because the Architect's Sesquipedalian Loquaciousness makes his explanations difficult to follow, Neo's response comes off as hilarious bewilderment:
    Neo: "Why am I here?"
    The Architect: "Your life is the sum of the remainder of an unbalanced equation inherent to the original programming of the Matrix. You are the eventuality of an anomaly which—despite my sincerest efforts—I have been unable to eliminate from what is otherwise a harmony of mathematical precision. While it remains a burden assiduously avoided, it is not entirely unexpected and therefore, not beyond a measure of control. Which has led you, inexorably, here."
    The Architect: "Quite right."
  • This Parody for the MTV Movie Awards starring Justin Timberlake and Seann William Scott.
    • WET. WILLIE. MR. TIMBERLAKE...!
    • You do NOT want to see me get out of this chair! Ergo, open your yapper one more time and I'm gonna architect a world of pain all OVER your candy ass! Ergo! Vis-a-vis! Concordantly!
    • The duo is teleported to Zion.
      • And then...
      Andy Dick: "Morpheus! What can we expect at this orgy?"
      Morpheus: "MACHINES!"
      [crowd falls silent]
      Justin: "Man, I'm out."
      Sean: "I dunno, sounds kinda kinky— [pulled away by the ear] ow! Ow!"
    • The Oracle gets recast yet again. As Wanda Sykes.
      Neo: "I see Trinity. And then something happens. Something bad. She begins to fall...and then I wake up."
      Wanda Sykes: "Now that's fucked up."
      • And she is direct.
    Wanda Sykes: "C'mon, man, show him your moves."
    Justin: "...do I have to?"
    Wanda Sykes: "I'm the Oracle, dammit."
    Justin sniggers
    Sean: What?
    Justin: Nothing.
    Will Ferrell: "Is there an echo in here?"
    Echo: "Is there an echo in here?"
    • "There are two doors. The door on the left leads sissy-boy here back to his bitch. Yeah, uh huh, what up, G? You can't handle it."
  • When Morpheus is fighting the Agent atop the trailer the Agent manages to get him on the back foot before Morpheus remembers he slammed his katana into the side of the trailer earlier. Before he lands what he thinks is the finishing blow, the Agent tides up his tie...just in time for Morpheus to slice it clean off with his regained katana.

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