- At one point, Elliot decides to attempt diplomacy with a plant. When it doesn't reply, he feels compelled to touch it, presumably to check its pulse.
Plastic. I'm talking to a plastic plant. I'm still doing it.
- "What? Nooooo..."
- "What kind of terrorists are these?"
- Lady, they're lions.
- "Why you eyein' my lemon drink?"
- The plant farmer's tangent on why Hot Dogs are underrated.
Hot Dog Guy: You like hot dogs, don't you?[Alma smiles and shakes her head][Uncomfortable silence]
- "Cheese and Crackers."
- "I went up and asked her where the cough syrup was. I didn't even have a cough. And I almost bought it. I'm talking about a completely superfluous bottle of cough syrup, which costs like six bucks."
- Elliot singing "Black Water" by The Doobie Brothers in order to prove they're "perfectly normal". Spencer Breslin's unintentional Aside Glance just seals the deal.
- One man commits suicide by lying underneath a lawnmower.
- In general, Zooey Deschanel's mannequin-esque performance as Alma, staring dead eyed wherever, whenever.
- This hilarious exchange:
- Alma: We can't just stand here as uninvolved observers!
Elliot: Gimme a second, okay, just gimme a second!
Alma: We're not gonna be one of those assholes on the news that watches a crime happen and not do something, we're not assholes!
Elliot: Just a second!
Unnamed Woman: There were children in that group!
Alma: Elliot, please tell us what to do!
Elliot: I NEED A SECOND, OKAY, WHY CAN'T ANYONE GIMME A GODDAMN SECOND!
Funny / The Happening
A lot of this film's laughs are unintentional: