* Rincewind trying to swear at Twoflower in Trobian, which doesn't really have profanities:
--> You little ''[such a one who, while wearing a copper nose ring, stands in the bath atop Mt. Raruaruaha during a thunderstorm and shouts that the goddess of lightning has the face of a diseased uloruaha root]''!!
* Rincewind working out the meaning of several words Twoflower uses, like "tourist":
--> Twoflower was a tourist, the first ever seen on the Discworld. Tourist, Rincewind had decided, meant "idiot".
* "Some pirates achieved immortality by grand deeds of cruelty or derring-do. Some achieved immortality by amassing great amounts of wealth. But the Captain had long ago decided that he would, on the whole, prefer to achieve immortality by not dying."
* The competing theories about the nature of the universe: the Steady Gait (as opposed to our world's Steady State theory of Fred Hoyle) and the Big Bang hypothesis - which, as it involves turtles mating, is the ''other'' meaning of 'bang'...
!!The 2008 TV film
* When Rincewind and Twoflower are meeting for the first time they are discussing the Counterweight Continent.
-->'''Rincewind''': But the legend says it's made of gold.
-->'''Twoflower''': Well, it's not made of gold. Gold is just a really common metal there.
--> '''Rincewind''': You might like to keep that to ourselves.
-->''(Rincewind turns around and sees Broadman several inches away from his face)''
* Rincewind is trying to drag Twoflower out of Death's house. Then we get this exchange:
-->'''Twoflower''': Amazing! I've never been at Death's door before!
-->''(Rincewind punches him across the face)''
* Rincewind flipping off Broadman and Blind Hugh after succeeding in communicating with Twoflower.