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Funny: The Amazing Spider-Man
aka: The Amazing Spider-Man

The 2012 Film

Peter Parker
  • The aftermath of Peter receiving his powers. After he gets bitten, he accidentally rips off the shirt of a nearby woman and gets into an accidental fight with an entire subway car of people that he accidentally wins. The next morning, he destroys his alarm clock as well as his sink.
    • And then, after he starts to realize what is happening, he speeds through several websites looking for the species of spider that bit him or information relating to it. Until he has to stop because the keys have stuck to his fingers, and he had pulled them off without noticing.
    • Special mention goes to him accidentally dislodging one of the poles in the train and then smacks two guys who are just getting back up with it. It slowly falling off his hands just punctuates the silliness of the situation.
  • Peter's reaction when he finally gets his webshooters working, all that's missing is an overwrought "BEHOLD!"
  • The entire Can Not Spit It Out conversation between Peter and Gwen. He spends almost five minutes just stuttering because of her, and Gwen just goes with it!
  • Uncle Ben telling Gwen that Peter has a picture of her on his computer. And Peter's terrible attempt to explain it.
    Ben Parker: She looks familiar. She's the girl on your computer! *to Gwen* He's got you on his computer. I'm his probation officer. *to Peter* Don't forget Aunt May. *exits*
    Peter Parker: Heh... character, my uncle. He's a pathological liar, and he thought you were someone else.
    Gwen Stacy: Aww man, you don't have me on your computer?
    Peter Parker: Well yeah. I mean, I took a photo of the debate team, and you're on the debate team. So... he must've seen me; I was touching up stuff.
    Gwen Stacy: *laughs* You were 'touching up stuff?'
    Peter Parker: *laughs* I'm not gonna answer that!
  • The Mood Whiplash after Uncle Ben and Peter had an argument, and Ben unintentionally brings up his father. Peter angrily slams the door which shatters the glass. Cue awkward silence.
  • Arguably one of the exchanges between Peter and Gwen in the trailer, when he sneaks in through the window.
    Peter: Hey.
    Gwen: Peter? How'd you get up here?
    Peter: Uh, fire escape.
    Gwen: That's, like, 20 stories.
    Peter: Your doorman's intimidating.

Spider-Man
  • Our first look at the full-costumed Spider-Man, standing on a rooftop... with Peter's backpack on. And then he has to answer the phone. And it's Aunt May asking him to buy organic eggs.
    • The way he boyishly sits and kicks his legs while talking sells it.
  • Just about the entire carjacker scene is a hoot!
    Spider-Man: (clears throat) You know, in the future, if you're going to steal cars, don't dress like a car thief, man.
    Car Thief: Who are you? Are you a cop?
    Spider-Man: Really? You seriously think I'm a cop, dressed in a skin-tight red and blue suit? You have the mind of a true scholar, sir. I was going for "guy who does the luge". (car thief opens the window) Good thinking, good thinking. Get out the window.
    • "You've found my weakness! It's small knives! Anything but knives!" *webs thug to the wall*
    • Earlier:
      Spider-Man: CROOOOOOOOTCH!
    • He then goes for the face.
    • Later, as he escapes from the cops:
  • Spidey spins a giant web in the sewer and senses the vibrations to determine the Lizard's location. How does he pass the time? By playing Brick Breaker on his cellphone.
  • In a fight, the Lizard demands that Spider-Man get out of the hole in the wall. How does Spider-Man respond? He throws a shoe at him.
  • The Punctuated Pounding as he tries to reason with The Lizard whose smacking him around with his tail
    Spider-Man: Don't...(smacks)...make me...(Wham)...have to...(Slam)..HURT YOU!
  • Just after he webs the Lizard at the high school, Spidey smashes a window and grabs Gwen. After a longing look...
    Spidey: I'm gonna throw you out the window now.
    Gwen: What?
    Spidey: [throws her, webs her]
  • During the fight with the Lizard at the school, after trying to talk sense into him.
    Spider-Man: Alright, so you don't want to talk?
    Lizard: *roars*
    Spider-Man: *shoots web at Lizard's mouth* There you go!
  • This line:
    Spider-Man: Aw. Somebody's been a very bad lizard.
    • Following this scene, he's thrown into a library with Stan Lee not even noticing the two are fighting. Notice in the background as Spider-Man is getting away from the Lizard, he's actually throwing books at him as if it'll have any effect.
  • A subtle one at the very end. Parker comes home all beat up and Aunt May is speechless. He then reveals the eggs she's been asking for.
    • The best part is that the eggs are still not organic
      • Fridge Brilliance? They're free range/cage free. Peter may believe they amount to the same thing.
  • After getting injured by The Lizard then flushed down the sewage pipes:
    Spider-Man: Oh, that sucked.

Gwen Stacy
  • The conversation when Gwen tells Dr. Conners who Peter is.
    Gwen: He's one of Midtown Science's best and brightest. He's second in his class.
    Peter: Second?
    Gwen: Yeah.
    Peter: You sure about that?
    Gwen: I'm pretty sure...
  • Gwen Stacy trying to make an excuse to her dad for not coming out to have hot chocolate, when Captain Stacy mentions Gwen said she wants to live in a chocolate house just last week. Gwen says it's "impractical...and fattening", and Peter has this sheepish smile on his face as he muses "a chocolate house...".
    • This culminates in Gwen blaming her outburst on a period, at which the captain backs off and leaves due to Too Much Information.
    • How fast Captain Stacy picks up on it implies this might not be the first time he's seen this...
  • Spidey's entire conversation with Gwen via phone telling her not to go to Oscorp to help stop The Lizard, and his constant flustered nature at her just disregarding everything he says.
    • Made even better by the bystanders watching and laughing in the background.
    • And taking photos with a cell phone.
      Spider-Man: Connors is on the way. He's coming to you right now.
      Gwen Stacy: *looks at the antidote cooker thingy* There's eight minutes left.
      Spider-Man: You're gonna wait there for eight minutes after what I just told you..?!
      *Gwen tells Peter that she's not leaving without the antidote he sent her to cook up, and that she's evacuating everyone else, then hangs up on him.*
      Spider-Man: Gwen! Gwen! You Mother Hubbard, are you serious?!

Others
  • Ben and May's reactions to Peter's Big Eater state following being bitten.
    May: (confused) Something is very wrong.
    Ben: Yeah. No one likes your meatloaf.
    May: (Death Glare)
    • And then, after Peter leaves the room:
      May: Why didn't you tell me you didn't like my meatloaf?
      Ben: Uh...
      May: You could have told me that thirty-seven years ago! How many meatloafs have I made for you?
  • Stan Lee's cameo, in which he is listening to music in the school library while Spider-Man and Lizard fight in the background. Plus, Spider-Man saves his life when a table is thrown towards him by tugging it away with his webbing and he walks out of the room without ever realizing that two superhumans were fighting right behind him. One wonders how he would react when he would come back and see what happened to the library.
    • A How It Should Have Ended short shows him in confused indignation before blaming the Avengers.
  • While the Lizard is fighting Peter in the chemistry lab at the school, he launches Parker through the wall, leaving a dark hole. So what does the Lizard do? Follow him in? No- he uses his doctorate as a scientist and mixes two chemicals together after a quick examination and lobs the now makeshift bomb, showing that this incarnation of the Lizard isn't just a mindless giant...lizard.
  • This bit:
    Captain Stacy: You think we just sit around all day eating donuts with our thumbs planted firmly up our asses?
    (a few seconds later)
    Gwen's Brother: Up your what, dad?
  • On the audio commentary for the DVD, Avi Arad jokes that they actually had Rhys Ifans' arm surgically removed for his role.
  • "... not to be confused with his other girlfriend Mary-Jane Watson, who is a skank and doesn't love him like I do."

The tie-in video game

  • A video game example after Spider-Man breaks Connors free from the asylum, he needed to set up a lab in Stan's apartment, where Peter is house sitting. Connors ends up using Stan's credit card to buy lab equipment.
    Peter: Stan is going to kill me!! How much did you buy?
    Connors: Oh I don't know, I just used it until it didn't work anymore, there's just one more thing I need.
    Peter: Please don't say a jacuzzi.
    • And then towards the end of the game, Peter gets an angry phone call from Stan about his credit card being declined. Even funnier, is that New York is a quarantine zone with rioting at the time, and Stan's apartment was just trashed by one of Smythe's cross-species hunting mechs crashing through the wall as it hunted Peter.
  • Also from the video game, some of the New York Thoughts, kind of like an in-game Twitter. For instance, before you fight one of Smythe's giant robots designed to eliminate cross-species (read, YOU) some of the tweets are pretty funny.
    Hey! Any1 feel that quake?!
    I was enjoying a latte, now I got butter in my coffee! First World Problems, man...
    Memo to self: Save my work more often.
    River dancing in the shower? Done! And I don't recommend it...
    Didn't feel a thing, I was on a bus. Saw people freak out, though...
    Sorry, y'all! New stereo system. Still tweaking the bass. = )
    Am I crazy?! I think I just saw a rhino running in the streets! Did the zoo make a statement?

Little Alvin and the Mini-MunksFunny/FilmThe Amazing Spider-Man 2

alternative title(s): The Amazing Spider-Man
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