Funny / Star Trek: Nemesis

  • During the wedding.
    Picard: While you're happily settling in on the Titan, I will be training my new first officer. You all know him. He's a tyrannical martinet who will never, ever, allow me to go on away missions.
    Data: That is the regulation, sir. Starfleet code section 12, paragraph 4...
    Picard: Mr. Data...
    Data: Sir?
    Picard: Shut up.
    Data: Yes, sir.
  • "... Irving Berlin."
  • "You have the bridge, Mr. Troi."
  • "I'll be in the gym."
  • B4.
    B4: Why do you have a shiny head?
    • and:
    B4: Why does the tall man have a furry face?
    • and:
    Data: B-4, do you know where you are?
    B4: I am in a room. With lights.
    • Data impersonating B-4 manages to convince the audience that he's B-4.
      Shinzon: You may go.
      Data!B-4: (beat) ... go where?
      Shinzon: (annoyed) Out of my SIGHT.
  • Worf demonstrates just why Romulan ale was made illegal in the first place.
    Worf: (groggy) Romulan ale should be illegal.
    La Forge: It is.
  • The deleted bit from the final scene, which shows that the Enterprise is finally getting some damn seat belts installed.
    Picard: About time.
    • Not to mention Riker's trolling of Picard's new first officer earlier in that scene. The poor guy probably took some time to live it down.
  • Geordi and Guinan at the wedding.
    Geordi: You ever think about getting married again?
    Guinan: No. Twenty-three was my limit.