- Larry Bird and Bill Murray's dry reaction to Jordan's disappearance.
Larry: You think Michael's OK?Bill: I'm sure he's fine, I think he just had to get away from that Stan character.Larry: God, he's pathetic, isn't he?Bill: ...You know, Larry, I'm going to give us 2's back there, we weren't in any emotional state to putt.Larry: That's fair.
- Jordan poses beside the golf hole that he gets the ball into so Stan can get a picture, and then gets lassoed into it into Looney Tunes Land.
Bill: (very long beat) ...What kind of camera is that?
Stan: (holds up camera) It's just a regular—
Bill: (grabs the camera from Stan's hands) WOULD YOU NOT POINT THAT AT ME, PLEASE, AND CLOSE THE LENS?! (throws the camera away)
- During the team roll call scene for the toons, nobody respects Daffy Duck, treating him the same way they do in the classic cartoons.
Daffy: Thank you! Thank you! (cue cricket chirping) Very funny! Let's all laugh at the duck!
- "But Mommy, I don't want to go to school today! I want to stay home and bake cookies with you!"
- Granny's the team cheerleader! God, they must have been desperate!
- For a scene without the Tunes, the talent-removed players undergo medical/psychiatrical exams. ("I've got other skills. I could go work on the farm. Or maybe I could go back to the jungle and be a missionary.")
Charles Barkley: This girl...five-feet-nothing...blocked my shot!Psychiatrist: When did you first start having this dream?Charles Barkley: IT WASN'T A DREAM! IT REALLY HAPPENED!Barry White on the soundtrack: Maybe that's why he can't sleep at night.Psychiatrist: Are there any other areas besides basketball where you find yourself...Barry White on the soundtrack: Yeah...Psychiatrist: ...unable to perform?Barry White: Yeah, yeah...Patrick Ewing (indignant): NO!Psychiatrist: I'm just asking.
- The Self-Deprecation seance scene where the players visit a medium, she summarizes the movie's plot, and they refuse to believe it.
- A much talked about (and memed) scene in the movie is often this:
(Sylvester uses a fishing pole to remove the trousers off of one of the Mon-Stars)Lola: NICE BUTT!
- The slapstick (that only cartoons can pull off) during the game is raw, unadulterated hilarity.
- During the Nerdlucks landing with their spaceship.
Pound (Orange): One small step for moi!Other Nerdlucks: MOI!Bang (Green): One giant leap for moron mountain!*Bang proceeds to plant flag right on Pound's foot.*Pound: AAAAAOOWWWWW!Bugs (looking down at the injured Elmer): And one whopper headache for Elmer Fudd.
- After Foghorn Legthorn gets blasted by a Mon-Star's fire breath:
Foghorn: Did you order original recipe or extra crispy? *turns into pile of dust*
- The sequence when Bugs and Daffy search Jordan's house for his gear. Daffy begins to search for the shorts. He opens a door and the shorts are in the jaws of a huge bulldog. Daffy slams the door shut.
- The doctor and the basketball players (minus Barkley) are all walking through a hospital. They come to a doorway. The doctor and Muggsy Bogues pass through fine, but the other three tall-ass players all smack their heads on the top of the door frame and topple over like dominoes.
- Bugs asking Jordan for help.
Bugs: "We need your HEEEEEEEEELLLLLLPPPP!"Michael Jordan: "Yeah, but I'm a baseball player now!"Bugs (sarcastically): "Right. And I'm a Shakespearean actor."
- Bugs telling Jordan that Lola is "obviously nuts about [him]" becomes Hilarious in Hindsight when she was characterized as being yandere for Bugs in The Looney Tunes Show.
- SPIT SHINE!