The dick size competition conversation in The Morning Star.
Mike: Well, as long as we know who would win.
Johnny: Yeah. Sandra.
"Hey, Archer - that's not what they mean by stage-diving!"
Simon's absolutely maniccomplete disclosure to Upstairs, Baker Hart, and Norton Fowles, which culminates in him blithely telling them that he's been in a sexual relationship with Jeremy Archer for over two years. The reaction to this news is dead silence, and then Hart cracking up, because really, what the hell else can you do when an FBI agent cheerfully admits that he's been having sex with an infamous, internationally wanted career criminal for years?
This bit in High Fidelity:
[after rescuing Annabelle]
Dave: So, uh, is that her?
Mike: Aw, Stone, don't be stupid. 'Course it ain't her. We just stole some random lady from the nosebleed seats and called it close enough.