Funny / Secondhand Lions

  • When "Jasmine" jumps Walter and licks him in thanks for the food and kindness in the cornfield. Also a Heartwarming Moment.
  • Hub and Garth's airplane embedded in the barn, upside-down.
    Sheriff: Near as I can figure, they were trying to fly through the barn upside down...
  • The final extravagant purchase by Hub and Garth. A yacht so big it barely fits in their fishpond.
    • Also the discovery that every single plant in their garden is corn, courtesy of a dishonest salesman.
  • The fight between Hub and the teenager with the knife. The teen comes in to stab Hub, who easily disarms him, telling him he's holding the knife wrong, correcting his form, then tossing the knife back to the teen, who then proceeds to attack again, using the exact motion Hub recommended to him. Though it still doesn't work.
  • After Hub insists on fighting the teenagers, Garth makes him an offer.
    Garth: Well look, you fight this one first, and then I'll let you fight the other three after. OK?
    Hub: Yeah!! Watch this kid.
  • Garth tells the leader of the punks to pick up his knife, because he'll need all the help he can get against Hub.
  • During a farming montage, the uncles pass a tin of tobacco between the two of them. When Hub has dipped, he passes it to Walter. Cue Walter taking a dip and spitting it out on the ground, while Garth tells off Hub.
  • All the not-so-tall-tales about Hub and Garth's past adventures.
    • Especially Garth's telling of the part where he helped Hub escape his chains. In his version, we see him fight off several men all while carrying about 100 pounds of gold. Walter questions how he could possibly do this, and Garth admits that "Hub might have helped a little." Cue the real version, where Hub breaks out and fights on his own, while Garth spends the fight trying to draw his gun and only succeeding after all the guards were taken care of.
    • Don't forget the midget.
  • Hub and Garth's will: "The kid gets it all. Just plant us in the damn garden with the stupid lion."
    • Doubles as a heartwarming moment, because not only do they leave all of their worldly goods to the great-nephew who was like a son to them, they also cared about Jasmine the lion enough to want to be buried in the same place as her.
  • In a deleted scene, Walter catches Garth mailing requests for companies to send salesmen to the house. Garth explains that Hub needs to keep himself occupied. Let that sink in. He was requesting that salesmen come to the house just so he and Hub could shoot at them.
  • When the group goes after Jasmine the Lion, thinking she's mauling Walter, the two boys are too small to even carry a shotgun by themselves, so the bigger one holds it by the handle while the smaller one helps support the barrel.