Funny: Sanford and Son

  • Fred's reaction to Mr. Wilcox's martial arts demonstration in the episode "Jealousy" is a Crowning Moment of Funny.
    Fred: This nigga's crazy!!.
    • There's an outtake where Roscoe Lee Browne (Mr. Wilcox) completely loses it after Redd delivers the line, making the moment even funnier.
    • Frankly, in those days, he really should not have been allowed to use the "n" word on television. But then again, Redd Foxx IS — or WAS — infamous for his undisciplined style of comedy.
    • Fred's cross-examination of a traffic cop who gave Lamont a traffic ticket.
    • In "Mama's Baby, Papa's Maybe," we hear Esther do the same thing upon hearing Big Money Grip declare that HE is Lamont's real father.
    Esther: What did you say, NIGGA?!
  • In "Lamont Goes African," the Nigerian woman Olaiya scolds Lamont for constantly chastising Fred.
    Olaiya: In my country, such behavior is unheard of! You would be beaten!
    Fred: I wish I'd had you In Nigeria: I'd knock you out!
  • Towards the end of "Sanford and Son and Sister Makes Three," when Fred kicks Juanita and her daughter out of his house.
    Fred: [Throws his smoking jacket at Juanita] TAKE THIS FAGGOTTY JACKET WITH YOU!
  • Every. Single. Time. Fred. Says. Something. About Esther.
    • "My Dear Esther":
    Fred: Goodbye, dear.
    Esther: Oh, you called me dear.
    Fred: Why shouldn't I call you "deer"? You look like Bambi's father.
    • "The Wedding":
    Esther: Fred Sanford, the wrath of God will strike you down.
    Fred: [picks up a bat and waves it at Esther] And this Louisville slugger will knock you out!
    • "The Surprise Party", after Fred returns from St. Louis and starts giving souvenirs to his family:
    Fred: I brought you somethin' too, Esther.
    Esther: Why, that's nothing but a clear piece of plastic.
    Fred: No, it ain't. Put it up to your face. That's your Hallowe'en mask.
    • "Libra Rising All Over Lamont":
    Esther: Who you callin' ugly, sucker?
    Fred: I'm callin' you ugly. I could stick your face in some dough and make some gorilla cookies.
  • Lamont prodding Fred for an explanation of why his clothes are all wet.
    Fred: Well, here's what happened... I was crossing the Los Angeles River over here, and about halfway across, I looked out, and there was Aunt Esther struggling in the water... and she was going under for the fifth or sixth time... so, that's when I made my mind up... I jumped into the water and tried throw as many fish up on the land as I could, so they wouldn't get a chance to see Aunt Esther's face.
    Lamont: (Bursts into laughter)
    Fred: I swear that's what happened.
    Lamont: (Continues laughing). How did you clothes get all wet?
  • Lamont saying, "For the first six years of my life, I thought my name was Dummy Sanford!"
  • Fred is at the police department, thinking his birthday ring - with his initials on it - was stolen from Frank Sinatra, and thinking Lamont and Rollo were involved, tries to clear their names.
    Lamont: Wait a minute, you think Rollo stole that ring, don't you?
    Fred: Rollo? 'Steal?!
    Rollo wears an are you kidding me look on his face.