- Benny's reaction to the group's "La Vie Boheme."
- When Benny reveals his wife didn't come to the show because their dog died. And then, Mark and Roger realize which dog it is. The one Angel killed for their Christmas celebrations. Accompanying faces from Collins (a silent "Shut the hell up, bitches") and Angel's face is just short of almost fake whistling like "I didn't do nothing." just pile on the hilarity
Roger: Why did Muffy -
Roger: - miss the show?
Benny: There was, there was a death in the family.
Angel: (innocently and genuinely) Who died?
Benny: Our akita.
Roger and Mark: (look at each other)
Evita! (reactions from Angel, Collins, Mark and Roger)
- In both the movie and stageplay, EVERYONE says "EVITA!" as if not just Collins, Angel, Mark and Roger knew about it and in some productions, a random cast member will bark!
Mark: Mucho masturbation!
- Especially the "impromptu salon in honour of the death of Bohemia".
Mark: And Roger will attempt to write a bittersweet, evocative song... *Roger starts playing Musetta's Waltz* ... That DOESN'T remind us of Musetta's Waltz.
- Especially Mark's capitulation of Mimi's contribution, which creates...quite the image.
Mark: Mimi Marquez, clad only in bubble-wrap, will perform her famous lawn-chair handcuff dance to the sound of iced tea being stirred. (In the movie, Mimi's expression and pose as he says this is the icing on the cake)
- The following exchange in "Life Support" when Mark goes to a Life Support meeting with Angel and Collins yet does not want the others to think he is HIV positive.
Mark: Sorry, excuse me- oops!
Paul: And you are?
Mark: Oh, I'm not- I'm just here to- I don't have- I'm here with— Maaaarkk, Mark! I'm Mark! Well, this is quite an operation.
- Adorkability Levels Rising: At the beginning of Tango: Maureen, Mark quickly advances on Joanne and spontaneously busts out with some of the most jarring, awkward dance moves imaginable. She looks startled and backs away slightly.
- Tango: Maureen is just one big CMOF with a hint of Heartwarming—Mark predicts and correctly guesses every move Maureen as pulled on Joanne (as it happened to him multiple times before) and essentially gives her an ear to air her grievances.
- Collins' Oh, Crap moment. "I may be detained."
"What does he mean? What do you mean 'detained'?"
- A blink-and-you'll-miss-it moment, during "Christmas Bells".
Collins: That's my coat!
Saleswoman: We give discounts.
- "Over The Moon". That is all.
- "Light My Candle" has some pretty funny moments, particularly:
Mimi: Do you want to dance?
Roger: With you?
Mimi: With my father.
Mimi: They say that I have the best ass below 14th Street—is it true?
Mimi: You're staring again...
Roger: Oh no—I mean you do—have a nice—I mean—
- In "Happy New Year B":
Angel: My cat had a fall and I went through hell.
: It's like losing a...how did you know she fell?
- Collins' Incoming Ham before "Today 4 U."
- "THERE WILL ALWAYS BE WOMEN IN RUBBER FLIRTING WITH ME! Give me a break!"
- Maureen's mom after "Take Me or Leave Me".
"Maybe now you two can get back together."
- Towards the end of the stageplay, as Mark is preparing his projector and both him and Roger are celebrating Benny's wife pulling him away from anything having to with the East Village, the boys' power goes out again and they suspect she found out about Benny's affair with Mimi and wonder who told her and then Collins walks in, implying that he ratted Benny out.
- Christmas bells are ringing, christmas bells are ringing, christmas bells are ringing—somewhere else.
- "Vampire welfare queens who are compulsive bowlers" Anyone?