Chris Knight. There's a reason he's the guy on the DVD cover.
Recruiter: You *are* Chris Knight, aren't you?
Chris: I hope so. I'm wearing his underwear.
But they seem to get it later.
Recruiter: Take care of (Chris). He's one of the ten finest young minds in the country.
Chris: Someday, I hope to be two of them. (they both laugh)
"This? This is ice; this is what happens to water when it gets too cold. This? This is Kent; this is what happens to people when they get too sexually frustrated."
"What about that time I found (Kent) naked with that bowl of Jell-O?"
"Was it a dream where you see yourself standing in sort of Sun God robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at you?"
"Why am I the only one who has that dream..?"
"Your mom puts license plates in your underwear? How do you sit?"
"Self-realization; I was thinking of the immortal words of Socrates, who said, 'I Drank What?'?"
Chris meeting up with an incredibly cute girl (Susan) waiting at Hathaway's new house:
Chris: If there's anything I can do for you, or more to the point TO you, just let me know. Susan: Can you hammer a six-inch spike through a board with your penis? Chris: At the moment, no. Susan: A girl's gotta have her standards. (walks away grinning)