- Ratchet's attempt to simulate the seductive dancing of robotic pop star Courtney Gears, ending with him making a kissy face at Clank.
- Dr. Nefarious is about to unleash his ultimate doomsday weapon - only to accidentally activate a hologram of himself singing loudly and screechily off-key. Seems his butler Lawrence "accidentally" handed him a remote that shows his rehearsal for "Galactic Idol".
- Nefarious has led the heroes into a trap and activated the self-destruct mechanism of the ship they are in.
Dr. Nefarious: Lawrence, teleport us out of here!
Lawrence: Of course, sir. [teleports himself away]
Dr. Nefarious: Lawrence? [beat] THIS ISN'T FUNNY, LAWRENCE!
[Nefarious is teleported away]
- When Ratchet meets the Galactic President (who sounds exactly like Bill Clinton), they have this exchange:
Galactic President: My daughter tells me you're a man who's good with his hands Ratchet.
Ratchet: Sir, I swear I NEVER . . .
- Qwark's mission briefings. In particular the very beginning of the first one:
Qwark: First, Ratchet and Clank will descend to the sea floor and wade through a series of tunnels flooded with waist-high raw sewage.
Qwark: Please hold your questions until the end of the presentation.
- It's also hilarious to note that his mission briefings was a slide presentation that was hand-drawn... with crayons. It looked like a 4 year old did it.
- Sometimes, when Nefarious' screams hard enough, he'll short out, freeze in place, and his voice will be replaced with the broadcast of a Soap Opera. The only way to fix him is a blow to the head.
Lawrence: [gleefully] Oh, this is the best part of my day!
- Here's a jewel:
Skrunch: *angry monkey babble*
Qwark: I thought we agreed to put that jungle business behind us.
Skrunch: *furious monkey screeching*
Clank: Too long...
- "One of Nature's Mysteries"
I've seen him run right through our campin' site. He was butt naked, screamin', and holdin' a banan'r. Or maybe it weren't a banan'r. It could be
TV Prompt: ONE OF NATURE'S MYSTERIES!
- When you arrive at Holostar Studios. Ratchet tries to activate the cloaking device on their ship, but accidentally ejects Clank, who lands on set. Then...
Director: CUT! CUT! That's it! You've disgraced my set for the last time, kid! Take up basket weaving! You're fired! ...Get me the monkey.
- We're treated to this exchange part way through:
Skidd: Sasha and Qwark are meeting with the president, man, they left me in charge of the ship!
Ratchet: WHAT?! I mean, I see... Well, is Al there?
Skidd: He's out to lunch.
Skidd: In the sauna!
Klunk: Qwark's monkey, perhaps?
- Ratchet's attempt at a eulogy for Qwark, and Klunk making things difficult for him.
Ratchet: Captain Qwark had so many, um, er... wonderful qualities, I just don't know where to begin...
Klunk: Such as...?
- The Biobliterator's sixty second destruction sequence:
Dr. Nefarious: What?! That wasn't even close to sixty seconds!
- Qwark and Nefarious' discussion about their school days.
Qwark: Remember how I used to clean the chalk board with your pants... While you were still wearing them? Oh, good times...
Nefarious: You were three times my size, you stupid oaf!
Qwark: I was always big for my age.
Nefarious: You were twenty-six!
- The very end where Nefarious and Lawrence are trapped on an asteroid drifting through space, with the nearest planet reachable within a few thousand years. As Nefarious sulks, Lawrence plays a few riffs on his bass before looking inquisitively at Nefarious.
Nefarious: Now what?
Lawrence: I don't suppose you can play drums?
- The bridge of the Starship Phoenix, where the Q-Force officers ask each other random questions while sitting at their computers.
Trooper: Officer Helga?
Helga: Listen up you lardball! The answer is NO!
- From Qwark Vid-Comic 4:
Janice: The baby isn't yours.
Lance: What? Who? Who is the father?
Janice: Oh! Your evil twin brother, Englebert!
Lance: But Janice... I AM Engelbert!
- Dr. Nefarious' audition for Galactic Idol, which shows him singing off-key as Clank looks on in embarrassment. If it were not for the subtitles, then the lyric would sound pretty silly.