Funny / Ranger's Apprentice

  • Almost any scene with Halt on a ship, period. No matter how many times he gets on one, he just cannot get used to them.
  • Horace mentioning Will's drawing skills (or complete lack thereof). Even Malcolm gets in on it. Will isn't laughing.
    • Also, the whole sequence during the siege where Horace is bored and trying to think up a poem.
  • In the fourth book, Halt and Erak are tracking the Temujai army, and Halt approximates the number of horses they have, which turns out to be a good estimate. When Erak asked how he did that, Halt says that he counted the number of hooves and divided by four. It takes Erak a second to realize that Halt is screwing with him.
  • In the eleventh book, The Lost Stories, more than half of the short story "Purple Prose" might make you laugh at loud.
    • Will tries to prepare a speech for Horace and Evanlyn's wedding, so he goes to Halt and Lady Pauline. Will's speech? Many complicated words tied together to try to make a "memorable" speech. Halt's reaction of disgust makes it even better.
  • The entire scene from the beginning of Sorcerer in the North, where Will defuses a standoff between desperate Skandian raiders and his fief by inviting the Skandians to a feast at the castle. Hilarity Ensues.
  • Despite above mentions of his artistic skill, Will is pretty good on the lute. Actually, it's a mandola. He also made up a song about his mentor, Halt.
  • When Will is awarded the Silver Oakleaf in Erak's Ransom, Alyss and Evanlyn are the ones to place it around his neck. Upon doing so, both of them impulsively kiss Will's cheeks and then glare daggers at each other.
    • Before then, the excessive nonchalance with which Crawley awards Will his Oakleaf.
  • Halt's obsession with coffee is often brought up and is just as often hilarious.
    • Not to mention his preference for honey in his coffee, which is treated by the other Rangers (including Crowley and Gilan) as a Bizarre Taste in Food.
    • Coffee in general seems to be the highest of Serious Business for the majority of Rangers.
  • In the ninth book, we are given what is possibly the most hilarious conversation of the entire series.
  • The conversation between Halt and Horace at the beginning of Oakleaf Bearers really has to be seen to be believed.
    Halt: [thinking Horace is about to ask yet another question] WHAT?
    Horace: What?
    Halt: That's what I want to know. What?
    Horace: [bewildered] What?
    Halt: Don't keep parroting me! Stop repeating what I say! I asked you "what" so don't ask me "what" back, understand?
    Horace: [very slowly] No.
    Halt: You were about to ask a question.
    Horace: I was?
    Halt: You were. I saw you take a breath to ask it.
    Horace: I see. And what was it about?
    Halt: That is what I was asking you! When I said "what", I was asking you about what you wanted to ask me.
    Horace: I wasn't about to ask you "what"?
    Halt: Then what, if I may use that word once more, were you about to ask me?
    Horace: I forget. What were we talking about?
  • In the eighth book The Kings of Clonmel Halt explains to Will and Horace that since there is no guarantee that the royal heir to a kingdom will be a good ruler, even if the parent was a good ruler, he prefers the Skandian method of election. Then later in the book after Halt unsuccessfully tries to convince his usurper twin brother, King Ferris of Clonmel to take the threat of a cult seriously, Horace follows Ferris into his dressing room and knocks him out, prompting this exchange:
    Halt: Horace Altman, what on earth have you done?
    Horace [gesturing towards Ferris's closet] I've just elected you King. Start getting dressed.
    • The funniest part is of course when Halt realizes he's lost control of the situation, and to Horace of all people.
  • In "The Lost Stories", Jenny gets A Day in the Limelight when she ends up taking out a trio of bandits who elected to hide out in her house while after a robbery. That's not the funny part. The funny part is how she does it: by clubbing one in the head with a roast, incapacitating another with a set of cooking knives, and letting Gilan have the third one when he tries to get away. Chef of Iron, indeed.
    Jenny: (at the end of a long rant) ...And they had your dinner!
    Gilan: (looking over the now-beaten robbers) Well... I don't think they enjoyed it.

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