This piece of dialogue in House of Chains, when Torvald and Karsa meets Keeper:
Keeper: Splitting one's head open with a single blow? With a wooden sword? In deep water? And what's that other one? Catfish big enough to swallow a man whole? Hah, a good one. Torvald:(stares at Keeper) Both true. As true as a flooded world and a ship with headless Tiste Andii at the oars! Keeper: Well, I believe all that, Torvald. But the shark and the catfish? Do you take me for a fool?
Shadowthrone's rant in The Crippled God:
Shadowthrone: Are you done with your moment of doubt? Good. It ill-suited you. Listen, she's a woman, and that alone makes her the most terrifying force in all the realms. Cotillion: Yes, I am well aware of your longstanding fear of the swaying sex. Shadowthrone: I blame my mother. Cotillion: Convenient. Shadowthrone: I don't know which of us dreads more our visits–- Cotillion: She’s still alive? Don't be ridiculous, Ammanas. Shadowthrone: Listen, I wasn't always this old, you know. In any case, every time we end up in the same room I can see the disappointment in her eyes, and hear it in her voice. "Emperor? Oh, that empire. So now you're a god? Oh dear, not Shadow? Isn't it broken? Why did you have to pick a broken realm to rule? When your father was your age-–" Aagh, and on and on it goes! I've been on the run since I was nine years old, and is it any wonder?