Funny / Majesty

  • The ending of the "Urban Renewal" quest. "Hey, Majesty. You've deprived this town of all crime, amusement, and entertainment. It's a wholesome, safe, and dreadfully dull place to live, if you ask me. Outstanding work."
    • The beginning is at least as funny, as the Royal Advisor struggles to put a positive spin on inheriting a Wretched Hive: "Um, Majesty, I have good news and bad. The good news is your uncle died!"
  • Also the ending of "The Wizard's Curse". "Let's ride the catapult one more time - Pleeease?"
    "Once we pluck all the Palace Guards from the surrounding trees and wheel the siege weapons back in storage, all should be well."
  • The Easter Egg lines are quite amusing.
    Guardhouse: 'Ey, whose turn for the donut run?
    Gnome: Is this gonna hurt bad?
    Dwarf: My wife's beard is even more attractive!
    Elf: (very aroused) I'm looking good...
    Solarus: Ooh, those elves look so pasty!
    Adept: Only Lunord can break the winds!
    Barbarian: Argh, sleeping on leaves hurt! Me want water bed!
    Healer: Can't we all just get along?
    Priestess: This game is to die for!
    Cultist: Agh, loincloth's riding up!
    Monk: *burps*
    Warrior: *hammy battle grunts*
    Warrior of Discord: That tickles.
    Paladin: Dauros! Grant me better headgear!
    Ranger: Maybe I can stop and ask for directions...
    Wizard: He who laughs last is... erm... worth two in a bush?
    Rogue: What's mine is mine. What's yours is mine.
    Tax Collector: Did you fill out your U3 stroke 18449 stroke Beta Zed 793 EZ?
    Outpost: If you lived here, you'd be home by now!
    Gnome Hovel: Dinner's run off again!
    Dwarven Settlement or Ballista Tower: Watch where you're pointing that thing! *boink* Ow!
    Elven Bungalow: (obviously coming onto you) Say, is that tunic a Bornelli original? Stunning!
    Elven Lounge: (from your adviser, who is clearly flustered) Your majesty! I-I was just, er, inspecting the... er... have you heard the latest reports about the goblins?
    Gamling Hall: (your adviser again) Majesty! My personal treasury is nearly empty!
    Temple to Krolm: I say, Glorg! Would you pass the tea?
    Temple to Helia: Oooh, ooh, oh, oh, ouch! Hot sand, hot sand!
    Temple to Lunord: Ok, that's four votes for decaf.
    Temple to Agrella: No, you can't play miniature golf here.
    Temple to Dauros: *crunchy food being eaten*
    Warriors' Guild: It's all fun and games until someone loses a pixel!
    Rangers' Guild: I'm just saying the other guilds have roofs, that's all.
    Wizards' Guild: Hey Randolf! Watch me pull a rock golem out of my hat! *goofy "yank!" sound effect, followed by a golem's roar*
    Rogues' Guild: Shh! Maybe they'll go away...
    Blacksmith: (channelling Beavis And Butthead) Ha... hahaha... they said "ball-peen".
    Library: Excuse me? Where's your "strategy guide" section?
    Wizard Tower: Are you sure this thing's not gonna fall over?
    Market: (bored voice) Paper or burlap?
    Trading Post: *laughter* Ah, stop taunting the donkeys.
    Magic Bazaar: Fire balm cleanup on aisle six.
    Sorcerer's Abode: I hate eldritch energies, they always make me itch... ooh...
    Mausoleum: Stay out of here, you meddling kids!
    Embassy: Are you carrying any fruits, veggies, or man-eating slimes?
    Hall of Champions: Sorry, sir, but your neighbor's dog is not considered a "threat to the realm".
    Fairgrounds: See the three-headed troll!
    House: I'm bein' repressed!
    Statue: Bloody pidgeons...
    Graveyard: *comedic slip sound effect*
    Creature's Lair: I like my peasant "al dante".
    The Abomination: Don't laugh! Abominations have feelings, too!
  • Some of the "flee" lines are funny even as your heroes frustrate you with their gutlessness.
    • The dwarves and paladins are clearly trying to save their pride.
    "Dauros has spared you... for now!"
    "If I had my good hammer, you'd be sorry!"
    • The rangers simply say "ooh, tough fight!" and leg it.
    • Fervus' followers have no shame.
    Cultist: Runnn...RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN!
    Warrior of Discord: Bawwwwwk-bawk-bawk-bawk!
    • Neither do Gnomes:
  • The sheer resilience of Healers defending their home is insane. They heal each other, self resurrect, and gain level that let them self resurrect even MORE. It ends up looking something like this. It gets even funnier if this presses their Berserk Button and they start cleaning house.
    • For that matter, when any unit not intended for combat starts mopping the floor with stronger monsters. Another particularly notable example comes with boss monsters spawning in, and then ending up being killed by a guardhouse and gnomes and/or peasants. (This being because the gnomes and peasants kept repairing the guardhouse, thus resulting in an almost literal Stone Wall that will wear down said boss.)
  • For a little random humor, open up the chat and type "planet fargo". What up, Phatness?
  • The Harpy Feminist quest