Funny / Love and Death

  • All of the conversations between Boris and Sonja.
    Sonja: Boris.
    Boris: Yes?
    Sonja: I have a confession to make. Ever since you and I were little children, I've been in love with your brother Ivan.
    Boris: [smugly] It's only nat... [Double Take] Ivan? You're kidding! He can barely write his name in the ground with a stick.
    Sonja: He has true animal magnetism.
    Boris: All that talk about some perfect love and you're hot for Ivan?
    Sonja: He kissed me.
    Boris: Any place I should know?
    Sonja: It warmed the cockles of my heart.
    Boris: Great. Nothing like hot cockles.
    Sonja: I think he's going to propose to me.
    Boris: But he's a gambler and a drinker, with a Neanderthal mentality. I mean, I love him like a brother. Just not one of mine.
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Funny/LoveAndDeath