Funny: Lilo & Stitch

  • The "Inter-Stitch-al" trailers for the film in which Stitch disrupts the Award Bait Song scenes from other Disney films. Such as Beauty and the Beast, in which Stitch crashes the chandelier, the Beast and Belle roll out of the way, Belle huffs "I'll be in my room!" and stomps off, Stitch giving off a Wolf Whistle as she passes by, saying "get your own movie!"
    • Stitch stealing Jasmine from under Aladdin's nose, with the princess strangely interested in the small fuzzy alien. Poor Ali.
    • Then there is also Stitch surfing in just as Ariel is about to sing "Part of Your World" with the waves crashing behind her... pause it at the right time and her face is just priceless.
  • Stitch's landing on Earth.
    Lilo: [wishing upon the shooting star that is Stitch's stolen ship] Maybe send me an angel! The nicest angel you have.
    Stitch: [hops out of the burning wreckage of his ship and laughs maniacally]
  • Once there's a full-fledged brawl between aliens going on in her living room, Lilo calls her social worker:
    Lilo: [on the phone with Bubbles] Cobra Bubbles? Aliens are attacking my house. They want my dog! [pause] Oh good, my dog found the chainsaw!
    Bubbles: Lilo! Don't hang-
  • After Lilo tells Stitch to build something and he sets out creating a scale model of San Francisco.
    Lilo: [completely deadpan] Wow. San Francisco.
    • Then, after Stitch goes on a rampage and destroys the whole model:
      "No more caffeine for you."
    • Just prior to this, Stitch going berserk all over Lilo's room... only to be calmed down when she just puts a lei around his neck.
  • Stitch learning to dance (in about twenty seconds).
  • When Cobra confronts Nani about losing her job, Stitch walks up behind Nani while holding a book. He stares innocently at Cobra for a moment, growls and, without any provocation at all, chucks the freaking book at Cobra's face.
    • When one of the lenses of Cobra's sunglasses pops out as a belated reaction to the hit.
  • The look on David's face when Lilo asks him to give everyone a lift to the shore - Lilo, Stitch, Nani, Pleakley, Jumba, and Gantu (although the last one is probably big enough to just wade).
    "Uhh...sure. But I'll have to make two trips."
    • Shortly after this we hear David talking to Stitch, and we hear him saying:
      David: So you're from outer space. I hear the surfing there is choice.
  • "BLUE PUNCH BUGGY!" (Stitch whacks Jumba with a blue punch bug car, owner: Nani) "NO PUNCH BACKS!"
    • BEEP!
  • This exchange:
    Gantu: [to Stitch] Abomination.
    Stitch: Stupid-head.
    • And what follows from that:
      Gantu: You're vile! You're foul! You're flawed! [all while trying to pound at Stitch at the end of every two words]
      Stitch: [grabs Gantu's hand] Also cute, and FLUFFY! [and tosses him out of his ship]
    • It should also be noted that when he lifts Gantu's hand up and off, Stitch has his second pair of arms folded, making a statement about how effortless this is for him. Which just makes it funnier considering Gantu is supposed to be more big and strong than he.
  • This exchange:
    Jumba: [after he plugs up a plasma gun with a carrot] You shouldn't play with guns.
    Stitch: Oh, okay. [casually hands it back to him as it begins to overload]
    Jumba: Thank you. [slowly dawning realization] Oh! I just remembered! It's your birthday! Happy Birthday! [hands it back]
    Stitch: [throws it back to him] Merry Christmas!
    Jumba: [throws it back] It's not Christmas.
    Stitch: [throws it back] Happy Hanukkah!
    Jumba: [as Pleakley scoops up Lilo and carries her away from the house]] It's not Hanukkah!
    Lilo: We're leaving Stitch?
    Pleakley: Trust me! This is NOT gonna end well!
    Jumba: [they continue tossing the gun back and forth] One potato!
    Stitch: Two potato!
    Jumba: Three potato!
    Stitch: Four!
    Jumba: Five potato!
    Stitch: Six potato!
    Jumba: Seven potato more!
    Stitch: My...
    Jumba: Mother...
    Stitch: Told...
    Jumba: Me...
    Stitch: You...
    Jumba: Are...
    Stitch: [disappointed] It.
    Jumba: [triumphantly holding the gun up] HAH! I win.
    ['KA-BOOM!!!; House explodes]
  • Lilo and the voodoo doll spoons.
    "My friends need to be punished."
  • This exchange is very highly quoted among some groups of people. From the very beginning (and please feel free to correct wording):
    Hula Instructor: Lilo, why are you all wet?
    Lilo: It's sandwich day.
    Hula Instructor: [nonplussed]
    Lilo: [huge sigh] Every Thursday, I have to give Pudge the fish a peanut butter sandwich.
    Hula Instructor: ...Pudge is a fish?
    Lilo: And today we were out of peanut butter. So I asked my sister what to give him and she said a tuna sandwich. I can't give Pudge tuna! [whispers] Do you know what tuna is?
    Hula Instructor: ...Fish?
    Lilo: It's FISH! If I gave Pudge tuna, I'd be an abomination! I'm late because I had to go to the store, and get some peanut butter, cause all we have STINKING TUNA!
    Hula Instructor: Lilo, Lilo, why is this so important?
    Lilo: [suddenly calm] Pudge controls the weather.
  • "Created something? Ha! But that would be irresponsible and unethical! I would never, ever..." [Stitch is revealed] "...make more than one."
  • Pleakley discovering the dietary habits of Earth's most "endangered" species which is later revealed to be a ruse by Cobra Bubbles.
    Pleakley: [gasps] Don't move! A mosquito has chosen me as her perch! She's so...beautiful...look! Another one! And another one...why, it's a whole flock! And they like me! They're nuzzling my flesh with their noses! And now they're, uh...they're...[camera cuts away to an aerial view as Pleakley gets swarmed by them] WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
  • This exchange, when Nani first sees Pleakley and Jumba in disguise:
    Nani: [to Pleakley] Your head looks swollen.
    Jumba: Actually, she's just ugly.
  • After Stitch steals a tricycle, Jumba talks about how his programming will draw him to large cities, where he'll causes chaos (back-up sewers, reverse street signs, steal everyone's left shoe.....). Stitch cycles around the island trying to find an city, only for Lilo to tell him that there isn't one and he has a fit.
  • When Pleakley criticizes Jumba for almost shooting Lilo, lectures him on the Mosquito food chain, and gives the viewmaster toy to him that he used earlier to show the Grand Councilwoman Earth. It becomes clear that Jumba cannot see into it because his eyes are too far apart.
    • Also funny is what Jumba says afterwards:
      Jumba: [to Stitch] Using that little girl for a shield...THIS IS LOW, EVEN FOR YOU!
      • Coming from Jumba, who was an evil alien genius before being incarcerated.
      • And this line that follows after Stitch mocks him by doing a headstand and wiggling his butt at them, saying, "Yoo-hoo!":
        Jumba: BAH! [starts running toward Stitch] I WILL TEAR HIM APART WITH ALL BOTH MY HANDS!
  • When Lilo shows Nani that Stitch can used as an amplifier for Lilo's record player. Nani's expression sells it.
  • David's pathetic attempts at flirting with Nani at the restaurant:
    Nani: Did you catch fire again??
    David: [covered in soot] Nah, just the stage.
    • Later, after Nani leaves:
      Lilo: Don't worry. She likes your butt and your fancy hair. I know, I read her diary.
      David: [pleased] She thinks it's fancy?
  • Nani confronts Stitch after everything hits the fan, whacking him with a branch.
    Nani: Where is she? Talk! I know you can!
    Stitch: [stands up, groaning] Okay, okay...
    Nani: [screams in terror and whacks him again]
  • Stitch talking Jumba into going to rescue Lilo.
    Jumba: What?! After all you put me through, you expect me to help you just like that? Just like that?!
    Stitch: Ih.
    Jumba: [beat] Fine!
    Pleakley: "Fine"? You're doing what he says?
    Jumba: He's very persuasive.
  • Before the Grand Councilwoman can take Stitch, Cobra gently reminds Lilo of her certificate of ownership. Without hesitation Lilo marches up to the Councilwoman, tugs on her robe and says:
    Lilo: HEY!
    • Then, when the Grand Councilwoman hears her and looks around surprised. It takes her a second to realize that she should look down.
  • The ending montage, with moments such as Stitch exchanging a lollipop for a bottle with a baby, and then dressing as Batman using the laundry (the clean laundry). Nani was not amused.
  • The deleted Tsunami scene... minus the racism. A bunch of white tourists were treating Lilo like an animal in a zoo, so she timed a rant about tsunamis and how they're giant waves that "move faster than the speed of sound" and tsunami sirens being your only warning to a siren test. She yells "TOURISTS, PREPARE TO DIE!" incredibly dramatically... and then the sirens go off. All of the beachgoers (plus Jumba and Pleakley) run like hell.
  • This dialogue during Jumba and Stitch's fight:
    Jumba: Come on! What's the big deal?
    Stitch: Inga tu shmeeshta!
    Jumba: I'll put you back together again. I'll make you taller and not so fluffy!
    Stitch: I LIKE FLUFFY!
    • And after Jumba tosses plates through the ceiling which Stitch is on, Stitch says something in alien that vaguely sounds like a Your Mom insult and Jumba's hilarious response to it:
      "Oh, leave my mother out of this!"
  • Nani gets fired from her job after Stitch attacks Pleakley:
    Lilo: Did you lose your job because of Stitch and me?
    Nani: Nah. The manager's a vampire. And he wanted me to join his legion of the undead.
    Lilo: [quietly] I knew it.
  • Cobra: In case you're wondering, this did not go well. (rips open door, causing all the nails to fall out)
  • Jumba losing it, ripping apart the newspaper announcing his incarceration and stuffing the pieces in his mouth...right as the Grand Councilwoman and Pleakley walk in.
    • Then he notices them and, instead of being embarrassed about being caught acting crazy, he merely lets off an evil chuckle and asks the Grand Councilwoman if 626 got away.
  • Lilo's first meeting with Bubbles.
    Lilo: Did you ever kill anyone?
    Bubbles: ...We're getting off the subject.
  • From the climax, we get this priceless line from Pleakley:
    Pleakley: Oh, good! I was hoping to add theft, endangerment and INSANITY to the list of things I did today!
    Jumba: Ha! You too?!
    [Stitch laughs maniacally]
  • The revelation of Cobra Bubbles previous employment. He is a former CIA agent that saved the world once when he "Convinced an alien race that mosquitoes are an endangered species." Suddenly Pleakley's claims at the start that humans are intellectually inferior become doubly hilarious.

Stitch Has A Glitch
  • From Stitch Has A Glitch: "NO MORE CROP CIRCLES!"
    Jumba: Awwww, all the other aliens get to make them...
    • Also from Stitch Has A Glitch
    "She's touching me. She's touching me!"
    "I'm not touching you!"
  • Stitch takes a rather unflattering picture of Mertle, and mocks her under his breath with a "Bleh!" before tearing up the photo.
    • Also from Stitch Has A Glitch: Lilo attacking Mertle for saying she'd never be like her mom with Stitch taking pictures. And no one can say Mertle doesn't deserve it.
      • What doubles the funny of this moment is that after Mertle makes her remark, Lilo turns to Stitch who puts up his hands to stop restraining her as if to say "There ain't no way I'm stopping you after that, go ahead!"
      • Stitch even takes a selfie while Lilo is beating up Mertle!
      • The scene directly afterward when Lilo's kumu hula makes a visit to the house to talk to Nani about Lilo's behavior. Lilo deadpans to Stitch, "Next time, flush the evidence." Stitch responds by miming flushing a toilet and making a "ka-shush" noise.
  • This exchange. Lilo and Stitch are at their wits end looking for an idea for Lilo's hula, when randomly a chicken walks by. Lilo goes from depressed to excited so quick, and Stitch is so blunt yet gentle about it that the timing is just hilarious.
    Lilo: <jumps to her feet> "That's it! I've got it! Elvis is trying to tell us to do a hula about a chicken!"
    Stitch: <gently touches her shoulder and eases her down> "No, he's not." <Lilo sits back down>
    • The way the chicken clucks after Lilo announces her "idea." It looks and sounds absolutely bewildered.
  • Pleakley's dating advices for David.
    Pleakley: (to Nani) "My name is Inga, and I'm a foreign exchange student. Are you jealous?"