Funny / Les Misérables
For a serious novel/musical, there are some funny moments
- Madame Magloir's concern that they might get robbed or killed because of Valjean's presence in town.
: “We say this house is not safe at all; and if Monseigneur will allow me, I will go and tell Paulin Musebois, the locksmith, to come and put the old bolts back in the door; we have them right here, and it will only take a minute. I say we must have bolts, if only for tonight; nothing could be worse than a door that can be opened from the outside by the first comer; and anyway the Monseigneur has the habit of saying, ‘Come in,’ even at midnight. But, my heavens! There’s no need even to ask permission
At this moment there was a violent knock on the door.
“Come in!” said the bishop.
- The scene where Javert arrests the Thénardiers is one big Funny Moment—i.e., "Would you like my hat?" and "You will not leave by the window. You will leave by the door. It is healthier."
- Culminating, when threatened with bludgeoning by Madame Thenardier, with what might be his most hysterical Badass Boast ever: "What a grenadier! Mother, you have the beard of a man, but I have the claws of a woman."
- When the National Guard first arrives at the barricade, there's a rather amusing exchange.
Guardsman: "Who is there?"
Enjolras: [singsong] "The French Revolution!"
- "I have just met Marius' new hat and coat, with Marius inside."
- Half the things Gavroche says or does. The scene where he exchanges insults with a sergeant of the National Guard and then knocks him over with a cart deserves special mention.
Sergeant: "Will you tell me where you are going, you wretch?"
Gavroche: "General, I'm on my way to look for a doctor for my wife who is in labor."
Sergeant: "To arms!"
[Gavroche knocks the sergeant over with the cart]
- From the same scene: "Citizen, I have not called you a bourgeois. Why should you insult me?"
- Even Hugo's digression on convents has its moments, specifically with the antics of little girls in convent schools.
- Combeferre's most effective one-liner in response to Marius' speech on Napoleon: "To be free."
- The entire chapter with Theodule trying to get in M. Gillenormand's good graces, and the old man's reply: "You are a fool."
- Towards the end of the book, Thénardier tries to blackmail Marius with the knowledge that Cosette is an illegitimate child. Upon meeting Marius, he has to pause and figure out how to best phrase the accusation, knowing that saying "Your wife is a bastard!" will more likely get him punched in the face.
- Hugo's aside when Fantine introduces Cosette.
"For Cosette, read Euphrasie. The name of the little one was Euphrasie. But the mother had made Cosette out of it, by that sweet and charming instinct of mothers[...] It is a kind of derivation that confuses and disconcerts the entire science of etymology. We knew a grandmother who succeeded in changing Theodore to Gnon."
- The scene where Fauchelevent, after smuggling Valjean out of the convent in a coffin, has to think of a way to get rid of the gravedigger so he can get Valjean out is pretty amusing.
- When Marius started to develop a crush on Cosette after weeks of seeing her and Valjean in the park, he found a handkerchief with the initials "U.F" on it which he thought that this belongs to Cosette and that her name must be Ursule (the only female first name with an U). Then, he starts kissing it. When Cosette saw this, she gives him a puzzling look and not to mention, that handkerchief belonged to Valjean who intentionally left it there. That's right! Marius is making out with Valjean's handkerchief!
- When Valjean confesses his identity to Marius, Cosette interrupts their conversation. At one point, she jokingly claims that Marius beats her and asks Valjean to defend her. Then she gives Marius "an adorable shrug of the shoulders, and an indescribably exquisite pout," and Marius randomly exclaims, "I love you!," to which Cosette responds, "I adore you!".
- Bahorel giving love advice to Joly. Note that this advice involves purchasing a new pair of pants.
- The bishop's completely blasé reaction to being robbed, especially compared to his housekeeper's hysteria.
- Grantaire's introductory paragraphs discuss how despite all the girls' rejections he boasts to his comrades that he is universally sought after. Two paragraphs before the description of his devotion to Enjolras.
- The whole of "Master of the House" turns the Thénardiers' penchant for robbing their customers into Black Comedy.
- Funny taken up to eleven in the 25th anniversary with Matt Lucas and Jenny Galloway.
- "Thinks he's quite a lover but there's not much there", and Thénardier has no idea she just said that.
- "EVERYBODY RAISE A GLASS!" "Raise it up the master's arse!"
- In some productions, a patron askes Thénardier for a chamber pot, which the patron uses then gives back to Thénardier. He puts in on the table and then his wife pours it back into a wine bottle, which she then gives him.
- In the 10th anniversary concert, since all the actors are seated on stage in between their scenes, they all join in the chorus of this with great enthusiasm. Watching Colm Wilkinson and Philip Quast happily singing along and clapping to the beat, and Michael Ball apparently trying to get Quast to join him in some impromptu choreography, is hilarious.
- Depending on how it's played, this exchange:
Javert: Your time is up and your parole's begun. You know what that means-
Valjean: Yes, it means I'm free!
- By the same token, Valjean's description of the circumstances behind his imprisonment. In some productions, Valjean and Javert appear to be partaking in Snark-to-Snark Combat throughout the whole exchange:
Javert: YOU ARE A THIEF!
Valjean: I stole a loaf of bread.
Javert: YOU ROBBED A HOUSE!
Valjean: I broke a windowpane.
- Thénardiers in general, especially in waltz of treachery
Shared our bread, shared each bone
Treated her like she's one of our own,
Like our OWN, monsieur!"
- In the robbery attempt, Thénardier goes "You will have a job to catch him, HE'S the one you should arrest! No more bourgeois when you catch him than that brand upon his chest!" when trying to mug Valjean.
- "In the absence of a victim, dear Inspector, May I go?", delivered with pitch perfect hilarious innocence by Matt Lucas in the 25th anniversary.
- The start of Beggars at the feast: "He's not fooled, told you so!".
- In some productions, the Thenardiers have a small argument after Marius and Cosette leave. Thenardier wants to leave too ("We've got the money, let's go!") but Mme. Thenardier yells, "No! I wanna DANCE!" There is complete silence for a few moments, while the other guests back away and give them apprehensive looks, before the song starts up and everyone dances.
- Another "varies between productions" funny moment for Beggars at the Feast— sometimes, the Thenardiers randomly stuff silverware into their costumes during the feast, and when they turn to go, a platter drops to the ground from under Mme. Thenardier's dress with the loudest CLANG. Silence falls as everybody stares, and the Thenardiers look upwards as if going "OH MY GOSH IT FELL FROM THE SKY", before snatching up the platter and exiting.
- Here comes a prince / There goes a Jew. / This one's a queer / But what can you do? Especially humorous if Matt Lucas (who is gay) is playing Thénardier.
- This part was made even funnier in one production where the man he calls a queer stops short and turns to look at Thenardier with a "The hell'd you say?" expression. The woman he was dancing with seems somewhat less interested in him after that. Another production had Thenardier kiss the man, who looked like he enjoyed it afterwards.
- In another production, the guy who Thenardier pointed to immediately started making "no I'm not, I swear!" gestures to the lady he was dancing with when she gave him an indignant look. Poor guy.
- "As for you, take this too!" *punches Thénardier.*
- There's also the part in Plumet Attack where Eponine tries to stop her dad from robbing Valjean's house:
Eponine: I'm gonna scream, I'm gonna warn them here!
Thénardier: One little scream and you'll regret it for a year.
- Gavroche after Stars: That inspector thinks he's something but it's me who runs this town!
- This exchange from Red and Black
Enjolras: Grantaire put that bottle down!
Grantaire: Give me brandy on my breath and I'll breathe them all to death!
- Grantaire is full of humorous lines.
You talk of battles to be won
And here he comes like Don Ju-an!
It's better than an o-per-a!
- From Lovely Ladies:
Prostitute: Long time
Anytime my dear
- Really, any part of that song that doesn't involve Fantine is pretty funny. The song is riddled with innuendos.
- In the 25th anniversary concert, during the robbery attempt, after Valjean and Cosette disappear, Marius is left standing there and realizes they're gone, darting offstage with his hands up and an "I wasn't here!" look on his face.
- From the same concert, when Marius is explaining why he's so out of it at the meeting, as soon as he says the word "she", all his friends take on the most knowing expressions. It's entirely nonverbal, entirely background, and entirely hilarious.
- A funny verse from the otherwise sad "Drink With Me".
- Valjean pokes fun at Cosette's naivete on his deathbed.
Yes, Cosette. Forbid me now to die!
- "The Confrontation" can be a funny Mood Whiplash since Javert again antagonizes Valjean just moments after Fantine dies.
- The two cops in the prologue arrest Valjean for stealing from the "honest" bishop, then said bishop lies for Valjean.
The 2012 film
- The look on Gavroche's face when Javert randomly picks him up in "The Robbery".