Funny / Jerry Maguire

• When Bob Sugar and a newly-fired Jerry are scrambling for their clients' services, Jerry picks up the line of Rod Tidwell, who proceeds to go on a diatribe about his current situation as Jerry nervously watches his other lines blinking. Rod then tells Jerry he'll stick with him as an agent if he does one thing: "SHOW ME THE MONEYYYY!"
  [Rod cranks up the radio and starts dancing as Jerry is dumbstruck about the whole thing]
  Rod: I got Bob Sugar on the line, I better hear you say it!
  Jerry: [awkwardly] Sh-show you the money.
  Rod: Not 'show you', SHOW ME THE MONEY!...Jerry, you better yell!
  Jerry: [screaming] SHOW ME THE MONEEEEEY! SHOW ME THE MONEEEEEY!
  [everyone in the office turns in Jerry's direction]
  Rod: You love this black man!
  Jerry: I LOVE THE BLACK MAN! SHOW ME THE MONEEEEY!
  Rod: 'I love black people!'
  Jerry: I LOVE BLACK PEOPLLLLLLE!
  Rod: Who's your motherfucker, Jerry?!
  Jerry: YOU MY MOTHERFUCKERRRRR!
  Rod: Whatchu gonna do, Jerry?!
  Jerry: SHOW ME THE MONEEEEEY!
  Rod: [calmly] Congratulations, you're still my agent.
  [He promptly hangs up, and Jerry slumps back in his chair, noticing his whole switchboard is now empty lines.]
• The Description Cut of Avery.
• "I didn't shoplift the pootie."
  • "All right, I shoplifted the pootie."
• "He said I don't like black people? I am Mister Black People!"
• Dorothy fighting with Marcee in the middle of the film
  Dorothy: How about a little piece of integrity in this world that is so full of greed and a lack of honorability that I don't know what to tell my son! Except, "Here. Have a look at a guy who isn't yelling 'Show me the money." Did you know he's broke? He is broke and working for you for free! Broke. Broke, broke, broke. I'm sorry I'm just not as good at the insults as she is.
  Marcee: No...that was pretty good.
  • As well as Marcee's "I'm a little pregnant here!"
• The locker room interactions between Jerry and Rod.
  Rod: No, I air-dry.
• Jerry's attempts for a Rousing Speech to Rod.
  Jerry: Rod, think about back when you were a little kid. It wasn't about the money, was it? Was it? [Questionably] Was it?
• Tyson going to town on the sports equipment in Jerry's office.
  Tyson: THE DIRTY MAN IS BACK! AH-HA-HA-HA-HA!
• "No heart? No heart? I'M ALL HEART, MOTHERFUCKER!"