Funny / Jerry Lawler

  • His reaction during WWF Armageddon 1999 when Miss Kitty (Stacy Carter, to whom he was actually married at the time) exposed her breasts on live television. The high-pitched screams implied he'd never even seen a pair of breasts before.
  • Lawler hosting the Miss Rumble 2000 bikini contest. Highlights include:
    • Telling Howard Finkel that the divas are not his type, as they're not inflatable.
    • The incredibly sexist way he announces each diva's performance.
    • Of course his over-the-top reaction to Mae Young exposing her breasts.
    • Bonus points go to Jim Ross for playing the Only Sane Man throughout the segment.
  • During Scott Steiner's debut, after spending a minute or so hyping his big return to WWE, after Steiner shouts "Gimme a fuckin' mic!", all that comes out of Lawler's mouth is a tiny "uh, oh..."
  • Any one of his jokes about Helen Hart, for instance:
    "I heard Helen Hart walked into an antique store. They decided to keep her."
    "I wanted to meet the one responsible for producing more tragedies than Shakespeare." note 
    "I'm not gonna say she's old but she is the only person I know who has an autographed copy of the Bible."
  • The opening of his match with Michael Cole at WrestleMania. Cole take shelter in his "Cole Mine" and tries to placate King with a handshake. King accepts...and then promptly refuses to let go, pulling Cole's arm and slamming his face into the Cole Mine repeatedly. The looks on Cole's face really sell it.
    • Also doubles as a Continuity Nod, as Daniel Bryan established that Cole can't escape a simple handshake.
    • He also pulled it off earlier when Cole screwed him out of the WWE World Heavyweight Title. The next week, he was forced to shake Cole's hand but wouldn't let go. At the end of the promo, Cole got hit by Randy Orton with the RKO.
  • Delivering a priceless Humiliation Conga to Michael Cole at Over The Limit.
  • Forget the "puppies"; what about how nuts King went whenever someone showed their rear end for whatever reason (especially Vince McMahon and Triple H)? Kind of makes you wonder, doesn't it?
    • This instance is only made better by J.R. and King's banter on the subject.
    Jim Ross: I don't think we need to see that rear end again.
    Jerry Lawler: What do you mean?!
  • From the 1997 Royal Rumble: Jerry is doing commentary with Vince McMahon and Jim Ross while it's just Bret Hart and Steve Austin in the ring. Suddenly, Jerry's number comes up, and Jerry makes a big show of it to everyone. Unfortunately, Bret's got no time for this shit.
  • Him claiming ECW stands for "Extremely Crappy Wrestling".
  • When discussing possible explanations for why Christian and Trish Stratus were absent from the arena, he mentions that they may have to to Viagra Falls instead of Niagara Falls. Whoops.
  • During the 2010 Slammy presentation, Jerry gave Vickie Guerrero a humorous receipt for a shot she took at him, then another when Vickie attempted a rebuttal. The following RAW, Jerry, along with John Cena, decided to further mock Vickie. The subject of the humor for both nights? Vickie's weight. Judging by the positive reactions of two different crowds, it's safe to say Jerry didn't disappoint.
    Vickie: Look Jerry. For your information, I have lost a considerable amount of weight.
    Lawler: You've lost weight? *glances at Vickie's backside* Look around. I think you'll find it.
    Lawler: I can't help it that you're the only WWE Diva whose bathtub has stretchmarks.
    Lawler: John, did you know that when God said "Let there be light", he had to ask Vickie to step out of the way first?
  • Jake Roberts had the unfortunate hobby of drinking alcohol and everyone, even children, could see there were times when he was not exactly as sharp as usual. Lawler decided that was plenty of fuel for him to use against Jake in promos. Good thing Jake was a good sport because Lawler pulled no punches in mocking Jake's wrestling with his inner demons, or his "barthritis" as Lawler put it.
    "You'll never hear the words "Jake 'the snake" Roberts got a DUI". He would never drive drunk. He'd be too afraid of hitting a bump and spilling his drink!"
    "Hey Jake, I found a tag team partner for you since no one else wants to take the position. *Jerry pulls out a bottle of booze*"
    "Jake knew his wife was ugly but he said that was nothing a 6 pack and a flip of the light switch wouldn't cure."
    "I'll do you all a favor. The first thing I'm gonna do is I'm gonna knock him down horizontal so you'll recognize him."
  • Jerry really liked to poke fun at Razor Ramon/Scott Hall's hair, to the point of saying Scott's hair had more oil in it than Jerry's car.
  • While walking down the isle to the ring one night in Milwaukee, Jerry decided to insult random fans.
    "It's girls like you that turn men into, well, people like Goldust." note 
  • Shortly before the Inferno match on the 1998 Unforgiven PPV, Lawler's shown to be prepared for the upcoming match: By bringing out marshmallows and hot dogs on a stick.
    • We'd be remiss if we didn't include this gem:
    Jerry Lawler: Tell me J.R., how do you like your Undertaker? Regular, or extra crispy?
    Jim Ross: That's not even funny.
  • After recovering from his heart attack, Jerry proved he was still quick witted, and had a tremendous sense of humour during a match between Brad Maddox and Ryback. As a visibly shaking Maddox walked to the ring like a condemned man walking the last mile (since, you know, all he did was cost Ryback the WWE Title as a crooked referee), we hear sirens blaring throughout the arena, and an ambulance backed into place next to the entrance ramp. Jerry's reaction?
    "Uh-Oh, gotta go. My ride's here."
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