Funny / Jackass

Let's face it, a lot of the shit they do is pretty damn funny. But here are a few particular examples:

• "Do you like sex?" "HELL NAW!!!"
• Parodying the famous Maxell commercial with Ryan Dunn in Jackass 3D. Only instead of a wind machine they place him in front of a jet engine. The drink disappears within seconds but Dunn grabs after it, several seconds later, only to make a "damn" gesture.
  Ryan: That felt like somebody was blowing a fireball in my face.
  Johnny: That looked like you were just getting the hell beat out of you!
  Ryan: Seriously, you can't fucking breathe!
  • And then they start screwing around with it further by throwing things into the wake of the engine; e.g. bags of flour that immediately evaporate, footballs and tomatoes flying at nigh-uncatchable speeds...
  • As one Youtube commenter pointed out, all that shit was done with the jet engine at barely above idle. If it was on full power? It would've been enough to rip the grass off that field.
• "Roller Disco Truck", partly for Preston's sadistic glee at driving the truck round the parking lot, but mostly for the cast's sincere attempts to pull some disco-tastic moves... while standing on roller skates in an erratically driven truck.
• From the first movie: "The Burglars". Not so much the concept (Knoxville and Bam fall through an office ceiling dressed as burglars), but for that one black guy who jumps from his chair and runs out of the building before they even get up.
  "Guys in masks? I'm out!"
• "The Switcheroo": While April Margera is asleep, Bam has his father leave her side and replace him with a bearded Preston Lacy (like Phil, he's only clad in his underwear). Preston then smothers April in the most obnoxious ways (slinging his whole leg over her, taking up most of the bed) until she wakes up and starts to scold "Phil"... and in the dark senses that something is amiss. She suitably freaks out when she realizes it's not her husband... but then finds it pretty funny afterwards herself.
  April: He felt.... shorter!
  • The DVD cast commentary during that scene is pretty funny as well, while they're watching Ape trying to fend off "Phil's" advances:
  Dave: What if it'd gone the other way and she was like, "Oh, yeah, Phil, let's DO IT!"
  Preston: Well, I think we all know Ape would've got fucked that night!
• "Hi, I'm Brad Pitt and I'm going to be abducted." And sure enough, in front of a public crowd, Brad Pitt is ganged up on and thrown into a van.
• "Department Store Boxing" from the first movie, which is both Exactly What It Says on the Tin and Refuge in Audacity as it pits Knoxville against... Butterbean, a professional boxer. The "fight" goes about as well as you expect, with Johnny moaning at one point "This is the last time I let you kick my ass, man." and Butterbean taking pity on him by giving Knoxville a free shot.
  Butterbean: Come on, at least hit me once. (taps his cheek) Right here.
  (Johnny socks him to no effect)
  Butterbean: There you go! (knocks Johnny out cold)
  • The kicker? After smelling salts are used to wake Knoxville up post-beating, his first words are a woozy "Is Butterbean okay?"
  • In the commentary of the film, Bam says that Wee Man misheard Butterbean's name and for the longest time kept calling him Butterball.
• In the deleted scenes on the first movie, Bam finds out that his friend Rake Yohn hates mustard to an unhealthy degree. He takes this and plans to have someone squirt some on him. Only problem is no one wants to do it, knowing full well what's in store to the fool who tries it.
  • Bam tries to pressure Ryan Dunn to do it, calling him a coward in the process, but Dunn was no fool.
    Bam: Dunn, for fuck sakes, just do it, stop being a pussy.
    Ryan Dunn: Dude, he lives a block away from me, a block dude. You live in another township. He could walk to my house and kill me.
• It's impossible not to laugh at "High Five!" from the third movie. But the really funny shot is the side view of Bam being knocked backwards like a bowling pin. Looking carefully at that side view also reveals that Wee Man draws back just in time to keep the thing from swatting his arm and possibly breaking his wrist, all while never dropping character.
  • If you pay extra attention to the burrito Bam is holding, it flies with perfect precision into the nearby trashcan.
• The "Bicentennial BMXing" and horse milking scenes in the second movie, which are somehow made ten times funnier by the background music.
• The visit to Mianus, CT, and the Hurricane of Puns that ensues.
  • Bam gets out a telescope so that he can see Uranus from Mianus.
• Pontius and Steve-O humping a shark during " Whale Shark Gummer".
• In Jackass 3.5 at a special screening for fans, the rest of the cast reveal in a video that Bam and Dunn have replaced a portion of Knoxville's medicated face lotion with horse semen, which he's been rubbing on his face, for weeks. Johnny, to his credit, found it Actually Pretty Funny, actually cackling in the front row.
• "Today's Debate: is it wrong to be strong? You be the judge."
• Before the "Poo Cocktail Supreme", Steve-O mentions that he's not worried about being covered in shit, but he's terrified of roller coasters, bungee jumping, and the like, to which Knoxville replies, "Looks like you have really irrational fears. 'Cast me out to sea with sharks, I don't care, put the hook through my cheek, but I'm not bungee diving!' What the fuck?"
• Speaking of the "Poo Cocktail Supreme", the alternate version featuring none other than guest star Britney Spears. As in, she goes inside the port-a-potty.
• Ehren shouting "That's Bam Margera, dumbshit, he's famous!" when he's in the trunk of the taxi in "Terror Taxi." The cast found it funny enough that they took to introducing him as "Bam Margera - he's famous!" in interviews.
• Pontius hurting his leg on the "Toro Totter" and stopping to inspect it, telling Johnny to hold on.
  Johnny: What do you mean, "hold on?" The bull's not gonna hold on!
• Everything about "The Brand," but especially the conversation with Bam's parents at the end.
  April: What is that?! A tattoo?!
  Bam: It's a brand! A hot iron for cows!
  April: Bam, that is so infected! That does not look good. Oh my god, he's gonna have that for life! You're gonna have that for life!
  Bam: No shit.
  April: You had the cutest butt ever, and now you ruined it.
  Bam: No, Dick-Farm Dunn ruined it!
  April: Why'd you ruin it?
  Ryan: I tried to do it good, he jumped around. I was scared of burning my own friend!
  April: Why would you burn him in the first place, Dunn?
  Ryan: Because it was funny.
  April: It's not funny!
  • "I'd rather rip my dick off and throw it in the river than do that again."
  • There's also Phil's reaction to the brand. April is horrified by how bad it looks, and here's Phil Comically Missing the Point.
  Phil: If he had one more, then he should've made it bigger and more realistic, that puny thing's embarrassing.
• In the credits for 3.5, Steve-O's reasoning for drinking urine from a pregnant donkey.
  Johnny: Why'd you drink that?
  Steve-O: Because, I'm horny.
• The Eggnog Challenge. ALL. OF. IT.
• Fat Lip sliding down a escalator. The way he falls looks like it belongs to a slapstick comedy.
• The fart mask. Steve-O is wearing a astronaut style glass helmet attached to a hose which Preston farts in. Steve-O ends up puking at least three times inside the helmet and to add insult to injury, Preston reveals that he took a shit while doing it.
• After Ehren gets one of his teeth pulled out by a Lambo in Jackass 3D, we have the following skit. The funny thing is that they eventually used it in the end credits of the unrated version.
  Ehren: (with a sheepish thumbs up) I'm Danger Ehren, and that was the Lamborghini Tooth Pull.
  Knoxville: We're not using that.
  Ehren: I don't care...
  (everyone starts laughing)
  Dunn: Now we are using that!
• Knoxville's hilarious dancing at the start of the Roller Buffalo stunt.
  Chris: What'd it feel like?
  Knoxville: Felt like shit. [laughter] Felt like I just got run over by a buffalo!
• In the infamous closing skit of Jackass 2, which was already plagued with injuries (Preston being knocked unconscious), some life threatening (Ryan's blood clot), Johnny Knoxville is in the final part standing still as a giant metal stand falls towards him. He's supposed to stand still as the window from of the wall goes through him, but originally, it went wrong and it slams on top of him. Everyone went silent because it was told by production that this could very well kill him if he messes up. Everyone thinks they just witness the end of Knoxville, what broke the silence? Johnny's daughter calling him out for messing up the bit, which led to everyone laughing it off.
  Johnny's Daughter: Come on, Dad, What the hell?!
• From 3D, The Blindside. Knoxville plays football against NFL player Jared Allen. It goes as well as you'd expect it to.
  Jeff Tremaine: Quickly interview (points to Jared): What's your job?
  Jared Allen: MURDER. KNOXVILLE'S. FACE!
  Tremaine: (Points to Knoxville) What's your job?
  Knoxville: (Weakly) ...catch the ball. (In a gruff voice) I mean, uh, catch the ball!
  • Bam, Wee-Man, and Dunn sum up the point of the sketch real good:
  Off-camera: You think Knoxville's gonna catch the ball?
  Wee-Man: No.
  Bam: Noooo.
  Dunn: Who gives a shit?
  • This choice line from Jared Allen:
  Jared Allen: "People don't realize that football is a game of physics: Speed and velocity... equal that." (Camera pans to Knoxville, writhing in pain on the ground)
• Also from 3D, every instance of someone going into a port-a-potty which promptly explodes from the inside with blue paint. Just POW!
• The "Super Mighty Glue" bit. Particularly, when Bam shows the difference his hands look when he super glued his hands and slapped them onto Phil (his dad) and Preston's hairy chest. He is immediately disgusted with Phil's because it's so hairy.
  • Right after that, April comes to check on Bam from behind, and Bam, probably due to experience, flinches massively, thinking she was gonna do something to him. Everyone laugh their butts off because of it, and Bam looks like a teenager who was just embarrassed by his mom.
  • And just moments later, Bam pours some rubbing alcohol on his hands to remove the chest hair, only to hear April warning him not to pour it on his Boo-Boo hand^note An open wound mixed with alcohol is not a good idea.. Cue everyone realizing Bam's mistake and laugh, while Bam starts to register the pain.
• Knoxville wants to test a groin-protecting cup in the, uh, traditional way. Hilarity Ensues.
• "Electric Avenue", which has the group (minus Knoxville and Wee Man) making their way through an extremely narrow hallway, with 15 suspended tasers and two spinning double-ended cattle prods (plus a couple of hurdles, all laid over a tire course, in case it wasn't challenging enough). Remember that the cast was shooting this sober to help Steve-O with his sobriety, and no wonder it took quite a while before they found the courage to run it. Summed up succinctly by Bam, who tripped on a hurdle and tumbled out while having violent spasms from incredible electric shocks.

  Bam (after doing the stunt): I changed my mind. Stun guns are the #1 most thing I hate now. Bulls are second, snakes are third. That sucked. Terribly.

• In "Pontius The Barbarian", where Chris Pontius dresses in a Chin Face, faces off against a scorpion with no protection. It goes as well as you expect. After finishing it, Chris gives off a rare bummed face, claiming to be extremely pissed. Bam ask a question that could pertain for just about any stunt they have and will ever do.

  Bam: What did you think was gonna happen?

• The "Ram Jam" from 3D, involving Dunn angering a ram using a tuba, with Steve-O coming in with a trumpet to act as a rodeo clown. Unfortunately for Dunn, first, the ram begins to attack him before he starts playing. Second, Steve-O gets his pant leg caught and can't get over to him. Third, even when he frees himself and begins playing the ram keeps attacking Dunn.
• The intro to "Barrel Surfing" from 3.5:
  Bam: This is Barrel Surfing!
  Steve-O: Big barrel surfing's for macho jerks with a death wish.
  Pontius: No, it's not. It's the ultimate thrill. The ultimate rush. Even more than sex.
  Steve-O: Well, that depends on who you're doing it with. (they all laugh)
  • The stunt in question: a surfboard is placed on top of a row of about 15 plastic barrels placed horizontally, and they took turns riding the surfboard all the way to the end of the row. Needless to say, the bails are a spectacle in themselves.
  • And then Dunn capped it off by launching himself onto the barrels with a bodyboard, but smacked his face against the board upon landing!
  Steve-O: "I'm Ryan Dunn, this is Face Surfing!"
• The group, in 3-D, playing Pin the Tail on the Donkey... on an ACTUAL donkey. It goes about as well as you'd expect.
  • Best bit about the skit: It's Danger Ehren doing the skit. Wearing nothing but a crotch cup. To which he gets kicked twice (the second one smack dab on the cup.) When Ehren does his second attempt before the donkey hits him directly on the "ding-ding" (Knoxville's words, not ours, Ehren groans "It got me in the dick!" after getting struck.), you can see Dave, Bam, and Ryan mocking Ehren's trembling as he walks up to the donkey.
• Steve-O says it best right before the Tee Ball stunt in 3D:
  "Why do I have to be Steve-O?"
• In Jackass Forever, newcomer Jasper is about to perform "Human Surfing" on the back of extremely obese newcomer Zach down a long plastic slide covered in lubricant. However, Zach slips at the start and hits the side... causing Jasper to fall off and slide uncontrollably down the slope.
  • The "Silence of the Lambs" skit, where several duos are locked inside of a pitch-black and tormented by the rest of the group, who have night-vision goggles. Chris Pontius dancing Buffalo Bill-style, Ehren getting tased with a cattle prod when trying to hide under a desk and then assaulted with a volleyball when trying to leave, Dave not trusting the skit being over and proclaiming that he'll just start a new life in the prank room... it has to be seen to be believed. There is a single unlocked door... leading to a room with pots and pans hanging from the ceiling.
    Johnny Knoxville: Gentlemen! I'm Johnny Knoxville! Welcome to Hell!
• In Jackass 4.5, Johnny Knoxville and Jasper decide to take Dark Shark (Jasper's dad) skydiving to help conquer his fear. Being Jackass, they decide to stage a malfunctioning disaster in the plane they were in, scaring the living crap out of Dark Shark. Dark Shark, a former gangster, who was shot nine times, says he came closer to death as he was in the sky, begging god for help and praying he didn't end up in hell.
  • As all this was going, Knoxville revealed he wasn't fully secured to his parachute harness, as it was slipping past his shoulders. So again, he came close to death that time.
• Also in Jackass 4.5, the Elephant Gun skit. Knoxville, Pontius and Eric Andre pretend to be big game hunters (complete with posh accents) shooting at others dressed like elephants with a makeshift elephant gun, then eventually turn it on Jeff Tremaine after he acts like a Jerkass, which causes the rest of the crew to cheer. In a behind-the-scenes interview, Tremaine even claims that nobody in the crew likes seeing him get hurt, to which Spike Jonze corrects him to say that everybody loved seeing him get shot.
  • The blindfold race. Poopies, not suspecting that the track will be secretly outfitted with hazards, naively running with full confidence as the other races hesitantly start, Jasper trying to use an ironing board as a shield; Knoxville casually throwing a lawn chair at Wee Man's head to get him to lose; and the starting gun firing repeatedly behind the racers just to freak them out.

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