- The Drill Sergeant Nasty telling one of the pilots that the next time he sees their ugly face that it's to be shaven. Said pilot is a rather attractive woman.
Sergeant: Suck in that chest!
Female pilot: (inhales and makes her breasts stick up more)
- "Why are you mad at me? He's the one who ate your father!"
- Admiral Benson's war wounds:
- He had most of his bladder blown off at Guadalcanal.
- He has a shell the size of a fist in his head (from Pork Chop Hill), and the only way his hairpiece stays on is by having a quarter of his head magnetized.
- Has sensitive ear canals because he took a bullet in Corregidor. He's able to pull a piece of cloth in one ear and out the other.
- He can't smell because his nostrils were fried in Panmunjom.
- His skull has been made of CorningWare ever since Normandy.
- He has ceramic eyes, due to a bazooka in the face at Little Bighorn or Okinawa... "the one without the Indians."
- Admiral Benson's first address to the recruits:
Benson: I look out there on all you wonderful guys and I say to myself, 'What I wouldn't give to be twenty years younger. And a woman. You know, I've personally flown over 194 missions and I was shot down every one. Come to think of it, I've never landed a plane in my life.
- Before take-off in training:
"Show me what you can do.
Copy that, Purple Fluffer Nutter.
Roger that, Milli Vanilli Chilly Willy."
- Washout ejects...right into the underside of Deadmeat's plane.
Washout: Do me a favor, don't land!
- "Wendy, I can fly!"
- The horrible doctor when Dead Meat is taken to the hospital:
Doc: We gotta work fast. I got a lunch.
Topper: I think you're missing the big picture, Doc.
Doc: Nurse, check his penis; is it longer than mine?
Nurse: No, Doctor.
Doc: Good. Now this is gonna hurt. (bites Dead Meat's nose)
Dead Meat: Ow!
Doc: Nurse, give me 15cc of morphine, quickly! (puts the needle in himself)
Topper: Can you save him?
Doc: Can't be sure. I'm not a good doctor.
- "Morale on this base is shot to hell. Just look out there. (looking at a painting) Quiet. Hardly a man moving. Roy? ROY! (swats hand down) Ugh. Huh? I even went to school with that man. It's just not the same. Been ignoring me all day. Remind me to send him a note."
Block: Sir, may I say something? I know Harley acted irresponsibly. But his kind lives on the edge. Always willing to take a chance. Now, we need Topper for this mission for just that reason.
- In the same scene, his total 180 on Dead Meat Thompson, who he was praising earlier:
Benson: I like your thinking, Colonel. Besides, Thompson wasn't that good a pilot anyway. He only had a small family. The kids are a pain in the ass. The wife's on the sauce. Poor bastard's better off dead.
- This, when the crew is out at sea:
Benson: Holy Cow! My cap blew off! Swing her round. We'll pick it up.
Officer: But, sir, we're on the mission.
Benson: Good thinking. We'll pick it up on the way back. We gotta mark the spot, though. Put Robinowitz in a life raft. Have him row in circles until we return.
Officer: It could be days.
Benson: (slightly annoyed) ...Then put some food in the life raft, for God's sake, man. Do I have to think of everything? We'll tape his favorite shows, he won't miss anything!
- When Topper and Kent fight, they put in mouth guards but this causes them to be unable to understand what each other is saying. Then Topper punches Kent:
Kent: Augh! My face!
Topper: My hand!
- On take-off for the mission, a small yipping dog chases after one of the planes taking off.
- Deadmeat's funeral. Upon hearing the twenty one gun salute, Admiral Benson pulls out his sidearm and returns fire. He's even carrying grenades with him.
- When a pilot pulls his plane into a handicapped spot, a wheelchair-bound man comes up to him, yelling, "Have you no decency?!"