- "Whoo! Bye-bye, Camp G- * CRASH* "
- The entire scene when Stanley steals the truck. The whoops from Stanley, Mr Sir holding onto the truck as Stanley drives it, and then him falling into a hole, followed by Stanley crashing it.
- In the book, When the Mary Lou boat is found, Stanley imagines that Mary Lou was a beautiful woman, but we all know how wrong he was.
- "Go on, run! There won't be no Yelnats the Fifth!"
- Armpit in the film attempting to trick the Warden into giving him a day off by claiming to have found something. A broken TV nob from the rec room. Mr Sir punishes him by refusing shower privileges for a week. The cacophony of groans from the boys is hilarious.
- "Well that's just TOO DAMN BAD!" Both the timing and the way the line is delivered makes the moment totally priceless.
- "Once, there was a magical place where it never rained. The end."
- Squid's reaction: "I don't get it."
- Counts as a Crowning Moment of Awesome as well.
Mr. Pendanski: "D-I-G, what does that spell?"
Zero: (knocks Pendanski cold with shovel) "Dig!" (runs away)
- During a montage in which Stanley becomes accepted by the rest of the campers in the movie, Armpit lifts up his armpits. Everyone runs away from the stink. Trust me, it's funnier than it sounds.
- When Mr. Pendanski asks Stanley whose fault it is that Stanley is at Camp Green Lake (obviously intending An Aesop about personal responsibility) and Stanley responds confidently, "My no-good dirty rotten pig-stealing great-great-grandfather!"
- An Embarrassing First Name reveal in the film.
Zig-Zag: "Say, I didn't know Marion was a man's name."
Mr. Sir: "It ain't."
- This line:
The Warden: "Now do as I say." *walks out*
Mr. Pendanski: "What did she say?"
Mr. Sir: "Not much."
Mr. Pendanski: "Then what do we do?"
Mr. Sir: "You do as I say." *walks out*
Mr. Pendanski: "But you didn't say anything either!"
- When Armpit tries to give the warden a knob he found and gets his weekly shower tokens taken away, who's more upset about this? His cabin mates.
Squid: "Man, you sleepin' outside!"
- When Stanley arrives at the camp, he's not too happy to be assigned a cot that previously belonged to someone nicknamed "Barf Bag".
Magnet: "This was Barf Bag's bed."
[Shot of urine stain]
Mr. Pendanski: [Offscreen] "Keep your bed clean!"
- When Stanley IV is sentenced:
Judge: "Stanley Yelnats, please rise."
All three living Stanleys stand up.
Judge: (rolls his eyes) "Stanley Yelnats the Fourth."
Stanley II and Stanley III sit down; Mrs. Yelnats Dope Slaps them
- At the end of the movie we have a particularly silly Funny Background Event; Twitch, a hyperactive boy who got his name because he twitches whenever he sees or hears about a cool car (and indeed, was arrested for trying to steal one) had replaced Zero and Stanley after they left. At the end of the movie, when Stanley is leaving in a limo, you can see Twitch running after the limo excitedly before Squid holds him back.
- Mr. Sir's obsession with talking about how horrible girl scouts are. Becomes a Brick Joke when Camp Greenlake was converted to a girl scout camp at the end.
- From the movie, when Stanley finds the fossils, the other boys gather round to have a look, and Armpit reveals a hidden side of himself and squees in an excited voice: "Look at the little fishies! Awww...!" And then, as the others give him weird looks, he deepens his voice and says in an overly casual tone: "I mean, you know, see, it look like those cave pictures, man."
- The Casts' commentary on the movie is actually really funny.
- When Stanley's lawyer walks to her car the first time after arguing with The Warden, she mockingly says: "Excuse me!"
- Mr. Sir's actually says Oh Crap! when the Texas officer recognizes him.
The Warden: I had know idea about this.
Mr. Sir: Just like you didn't know Pendanski was no doctor.
(all the campers laugh)
- Stanley telling The Warden "Excuse me?" after she begs him to let her see the inside of the chest.
- The statue of Poseidon seen at the end of the film is holing a shovel instead of a trident.
- Grandpa when the police are searching Stanley's room:
Grandpa: You don't have to answer that! We have the right to remain silent!
- The campers talking Stanley and Zero's escape:
Armpit: "Maybe they're still alive."
X-Ray: "Maybe Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy are alive too."