Funny / Green Lantern: The Animated Series

In the show

  • One of the Guardians chastises Hal for punching the viceroy of an alien planet in the face. Hal objects to that, saying he punched him in the stomach, then headbutted him in the face.
  • Rev not knowing what a secret identity is and Kilowog's explanation:
    "That's Hal's hangup. That thing on his face, it's a mask. He wears it in case some Earthling climbs aboard the Interceptor, while we're in space mind you, and says 'AHA! THE GREEN LANTERN ON MY PLANET IS HAL JORDAN! I'M TELLIN' EVERYONE!'"
    • Hal's retort is pretty funny too:
      "Talk to me when your planet invents paparazzi and the 24-hour news cycle."
  • When Hal is about to break into a space prison with Kilowog, he tells the alien creature they captured that dinner will be in two hours, and if they don't come back "start without us because we are probably dead."
  • Carol points out that "Yeehaw!" doesn't exactly transcribe to on an after-flight report and asks for words. Hal obliges.
    "Plane go fast. Very fast. Plane goooood."
  • Hal's failed attempt to get past the Interceptor's security surely qualifies. It involves him making a wobbly construct of Ganthet and poorly imitating his voice. Security isn't fooled.
  • Hal sets a speed record for reciting the Oath:
    • More awesome than funny, but the funny's still there.
  • Kilowog noting the improper pronunciation of Aya's name.
    Kilowog: That doesn't spell "Aya". It spells "Ai-eeeeeeee"
    Hal: But Aya's a pretty name, a pretty name for a pretty girl.
    • Aya's entire introduction. Especially funny because Hal is flirting with the ship.
  • When Hal takes manual control of the ship, his flying causes Kilowog, who's roughly the size of a brick wall, to bounce around like a ping pong ball.
  • When Hal, with a near exhausted power ring, offers to draw off the attacking Red Lanterns.
    Kilowog: What do you want on your tombstone?
    Hal: "He spent the rest of his long life ensuring his ring was fully charged."
    • Appears to be becoming a running theme. In episode 3, after Hal and Kilowog find that their rings aren't working:
      Hal: I'm almost 90% sure I charged it this time.
  • Any time Zilius Zox is physically abused, by Atrocitus or otherwise. His shape also makes him super bouncy, which makes this even funnier.
  • Kilowog, Hal and Razer are seated at a table. Hal instructs the others to shake hands. They shake... their fists at each other.
    Hal (exasperated): Not like that.
    • This little exchange, on a disabled cargo ship.
      Razer: Only insects and vermin hatch from eggs.
      Kilowog: I hatched from an egg.
      Razer: My point exactly.
  • Aya's reactions to Hal continuously blowing her off during "Into the Abyss".
    "He must not have heard me."
  • When Aya boasts about how quickly she can assemble her robot body, Hal has this to say in response to Kilowog wanting him to put her back in her place:
    Hal: Any girl who can get ready in less than three seconds has my stamp of approval.
  • Hal's response to Iolande introducing herself.
    Hal: Iolande... your name sounds like a waterfall. (kisses her hand)
    Kilowog: Worst line ever.
  • Roll call.
    Kilowog: Aya?
    Aya: Present.
    Kilowog: Razer?
    Razer: Hmmph.
    Kilowog: Jordan?
    *Hal playing Pong with his ring.*
  • Saint Walker, this in particular:
    Saint Walker: I am Saint Walker, and you are?
    Razer: About to kick your smug rear.
    Saint Walker: That is not a very pleasant name. Not in the least.
    • Especially that it's technically a Mood Whiplash, as right before this quote Saint Walker was talking all serious about how the ships crashed due to their doomed goals, and then just becomes all pleasant immediately afterwards.
    • His and Razer's entire fight has shades of this, Razer's going all out simply trying to land a single punch on Walker, who in turn is dodging everything with ease and treating the whole situation more like the two are simply out on a friendly stroll.
  • "Uh, Master, permission to cut off Razer's head?"
  • Kilowog learns about cheese:
    Kilowog: What is...cheese, exactly?
    Kilowog:[Beat] ...from now on, how about you eat that in a closet or something?
    • Hal's attempts to find food on his own. It...doesn't go well for him.
  • Queen Aga'Po explaining that her race had split off from the Guardians.
    Kilowog: You and the Guardians? Thanks for putting that in my head.
  • Hal's first attempt to reason with A Brainwashed and Crazy Carol Ferris.
    Hal: I don't know how you got here, or into that outfit which, you look great in by the way.
  • Razer's when Aya reports about something wrong with Kilowog.
    Razer: I knew this planet would be more trouble than it's worth.
  • In "Regime Change", Ganthet creates a Blue power battery just in time. Cue Hal, Iolande, and Kilowog getting massive power-ups... and Razer's ring blinking out, leading to him plummeting several hundred feet from the air. Screaming.
  • Razer gets his ring shut off by the Blue Lantern battery, and the scene with Aya having to rescue him is played like an impotence joke.
  • After successfully saving his crew, getting the code from thanagarians, and getting the Red Lanterns off their backs, Kilowog says they even got to keep a deceased guardian's ring, only to discover that Byth Rok (the thanagarian leader) stole the ring off his hand. Kilowog has a brief, but still hilarious reaction to this.
    Kilowog: That, that thief!
  • Byth Rok's death was pretty brutal, but the prelude to it has some funny scenes:
    Atrocitus: Tell me the code to the Lighthouse. Now.
    Byth Rok: For two thousand...
    Zilius Zox: Money? You dare haggle with Lord Atrocitus as if he were a stinkin' lop fruit vendor?
    [Byth Rok is electrocuted]
    Byth Rok: thousand?
    Zilius Zox: [Beat] ...he did come down 50%, Master. That's a pretty good deal.
  • Literally Getting Crap Past the Radar: "I hate to be the glurg in the punchbowl, but ... "
  • During Homecoming, Razer is being wished luck by the Star Sapphires:
    Razer: I won't lounge in luxury while evil triumphs.
    Ghia'ta: Then go, in the spirit of love.
  • Zilius Zox's frantic reaction after believing that the Guardians realized that they're in command of the Interceptor.
  • Hal gets to know Guy. At which point Guy says that Hal looks like a fanboy rather than a real Lantern.
    • Before that, Guy interrupting Hal talking to the reporter:
    Hal Jordan: 'Some other'? You really should check your facts. I am the only Green Lantern of...[gets shoved aside by Guy] ugh!
    Guy Gardner: Green Lantern of "Ugh"? You'd better get back there!
    • Also, when they investigate the Manhunter base:
      Guy Gardner: Hey, it's my little sidekick. Stay outside, I'll call ya if I need ya. [beat] At never o'clock!
  • Guy Gardner acts sympathetic towards Hal after Carol ends their relationship because she doesn't want him to choose between her and being a Green Lantern. He then asks about getting Carol's number, at which point Hal punches him in the face.
    • "Say, is that Guy Gardner?"
  • Tomar-Re referring to Hal's gut feeling as his "digestive juices".
  • Hal Jordan vs. Ch'p, the Green Lantern Squirrel. Ch'p wins.
    Hal: No mas! No mas!
    • To put it in context, Hal offers to fight Kilowog's best recruit in order to persuade him to join his Manhunter investigation. Kilowog then reveals he was gonna go with him anyway, he just wanted to watch Hal get his ass kicked by the squirrel.
  • Kilowog telling Hal his recruits are "Like his children"...and promptly yelling at one at the top of his lungs for doing something wrong.
  • Hal and Kilowog get introduced to LANOS, who promptly tosses them around for insulting him, all in a very cheery tone.
  • Ch'p's escape from the science lab being momentarily foiled when a container gets sent through the pneumatic tube he used to get in.
  • While Kilowog is arguing with Tomar-Re that Hal Jordan is still alive, the man himself calls in to tell them as much. Kilowog snaps at him not to interrupt before realizing the implications.
  • Kilowog comments on Razer taking a level in kindness:
    Kilowog: Looks like Razer. Definitely smells like Razer. But you ain't acting like Razer. What have you done with the angry guy?
  • In "Blue Hope", Aya tries to work with a damaged Manhunter, hoping to convince it to choose a different path. Her initial attempts go poorly, to which Aya can only respond:
    • Word of God said that it was Bruce Timm's idea. Of course it was.
    • From the very beginning of the episode, Saint Walker is mentoring two students. One is his second in command Warth. The other? A very easily distracted Razer.
  • Kilowog tries to play the part of the drill sergeant again in "Prisoner of Sinestro". Mimicking his attitude from the roll call above, Hal is busy playing Solitaire with his ring.
  • Watching a mind-controlled Razer putting the moves on Aya is as confusing and hilarious in-universe as it is for the audience. Hal probably never expected he'd have to give The Talk to a robot.
    Aya: (somewhat stunned) Analyzing interaction. Analyzing...
  • Kilowog objects to Sinestro's claim that they've turned the best ship in the Corps into a day spa by drinking the smoothie Aya made in the most badass way he can. It fails.
    Kilowog: No one's getting soft here. *chomps down on the straw and slurps*
  • Hal's Moment Killer in "Loss". Razer has a look on his face that just screams, "Damn you, Jordan."
    • One of the Science Director's attempts to build good relations with the Red Lanterns is to suggest building statues. Zilius Zox likes the idea of having a statue or two...thousand on Ysmault.
    • Zox catches the team trying to hide a reactivated Manhunter. Kilowog is forced to bonk him over the head with a hammer, complete with cartoonish *bonk* sound effect.
    • They gag him when they take him prisoner. When the Science Director shows up, she demands that they remove it. After about a minute of listening to him complain, she asks them to put the gag back on.
  • "Babel" is loaded with these:
    • Kilowog chants a rhyme to boost the trio's morale. Hal comes up with his own rhyme:
      Guardians make my head hurt,
      Appa's face is old as dirt!
      • And then Kilowog says how that doesn't rhyme in his language.
      • And then this:
        Razer: Or make them less irritating!
        Hal and Kilowog: [at the same time] Who's irritating?
        Razer: Anyone wearing green, apparently.
    • Hal trying to communicate with Razer and Kilowog, without the ring translator.
      Hal: Me, Hal!
      Kilowog: Poozer.
    • The Running Gag of no one being able to follow a simple "3, 2, 1" count without a translator.
    • Hal and Kilowog manage to recharge their rings on a severed Manhunter head. Kilowog then tosses it to Razer, who holds up the head and his red ring hand as silent snark.
    • This exchange:
      Hal: That's our ticket inside. When it passes us, we need to slip under the last vehicle.
      Kilowog: [speaks in alien language]
      Hal: I suppose fashion-plate here has a better idea?
      Razer: He says, "That's our ticket inside. When it passes us, we need to slip under the last vehicle."
      Hal: Huh, okay. Good plan.
    • An alien with a means of transport demands payment from the trio. Hal offers some keys, a pack of gum, and a cell phone. Kilowog offers a handful of worms. Razer offers a couple of shuriken and knives. Lots and lots of knives.
      • It's later shown that those weren't all his shuriken.
      • Then the alien asks for Carol as a payment, causing Hal to ask the others how to explain him he can't, of course, do that. Killowog's method is... radical, but effective.
    • "What have you done to Mother?"
    • Razer's Cherry Tapping the alien at the end of the fight by throwing the Manhunter's helmet at it.
    • Also, Razer's absolutely deadpan expression when he stares at the camera seconds before Hal grabs him with his ring.
  • Poor Carol getting pulled to Zamaron in the middle of lunch, complete with tray and tongs in hand. Her reaction really sells it.
    • Then she snarks about it:
      Carol: Is this going to take long? The buffet closes in five minutes.
    • Also, when she is asked to fight Atrocitus:
      Carol: [after seeing Atrocitus' Transformation Sequence] Are you kidding me?! How is that fair?
  • Anything Larfleeze says during his self-entitled episode.
    Larfleeze: It's MINE!!! (Throws a tantrum) MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE!
    Razer: He's insane.
    • Razer meets LANOS:
      LANOS: Greetings and salutations. I am LANOS: the Lightspeed Astronomical Navigation Operating System. How can I serve you today?
      Kilowog: Ay-uh.
      Razer: What?
      Kilowog: Lame-o.
      Razer: I will need more information.
      LANOS: "More information" accessing: The Crintel beast has five brains, two of which are located in its buttocks.
      Razer: Lame-o. I understand now. That is hilarious.
    • More LANOS goodness:
      Kilowog: What the nords just happened?
    • Razer's opinion on Kilowog's attempts to barter with Larfleeze to help them take the Orange Battery from Hal (who is infected with its overwhelming greed):
      Razer: This is pointless.
    • When Larfleeze senses the avarice-possessed Hal is taking some of his rings:
      Larfleeze: He's touching my stuff! I can feel it! He's touching, touching, touching my stuff! (Angrish) Stop touching my STUUUUUUUUUUUUUFFFF!!! (Barrels off in Hal's direction)
    • When Larfleeze is finally "reunited" with his battery, he hugs it, falls to the floor, and begins to roll back and forth on his side with it in unmitigated glee, exclaiming, "Oh, how I missed you!"
    • Larfleeze offering the group a nice reward before they leave. Then a smaller reward. Then a yet smaller one... and a fly. Which he eats instead of giving them. So he just "gives" them his best wishes.
  • In "Scarred", Kilowog tells LANOS to shut up when he goes on and on about the star system they've just entered. When space turtles attack them and Kilowog complains, LANOS proudly states that he followed Kilowog's orders successfully.
    • From the same episode, Kilowog accidentally discovering Scar's secret lab after noticing a misaligned planet on a star map and deciding to realign it.
      Hal: Thank you, Kilowog's OCD.
    • There's also Hal trying to break into Scar's quarters using a credit card construct.
  • In "Ranx," when Hal finds out that Guy was promoted to the Honor Guard:
    Hal: So wait, if you're here, then who's the new Green Lantern of Earth?
    Guy: I dunno, some other Earth guy, what's his name... John Stewart.
    • The Manhunters speaking in Aya's voice. Unintentionally hilarious.
    • After Hal gives his explanation for why they should work with the Anti-Monitor for now:
      Razer: I despise that you have a point.
    • Once again, Hal's mask is lampshaded:
      Guy: By the way, good thing you got your tiny mask on, in case someone from this uninhabited alien planet recognizes you!
      Chaselon and Larvox touch their own masks.
  • From "Dark Matter": Guy Gardner boosts morale.
    Guy Gardner: What is this, bingo night at the retirement home? POUR IT ON!
    • Later calling Razer "Red Pajamas".
    • Another Guy Gardner line:
    Kilowog: Too many of 'em! No way we're bustin' through!
    Guy: Awww, the little robots are too tough for the sargeant? You want I should send one of the guys out for a smaller, weaker universe-threatening entity?
    • Although it's mostly awesome, Kilowog and Guy's idea for getting Razer through the Manhunters? Shoot him out of a giant green construct gun in a red, bullet-shaped construct.