Funny / Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned

  • In an Internal Homage to a similar mission in San Andreas, one of the random character missions has Johnny stumbling onto Dave Grossman, one of The Lost's part-time applicants, outside the law firm where Dave works. Dave has stumbled onto some legal trouble, and he needs Johnny to bail him out. How does Johnny respond to this daunting and morally reprehensible task?
    Dave: I'm a lawyer, and I'm getting ass-raped by the law! Can you imagine what that feels like?
    Johnny: Mercifully not.
    Dave: Look, all I need for you is to intimidate her lawyer. Just make him get her to back down, man.
    Johnny: So you want me to go put the fear of the The Lord in a lawyer? And you're gonna pay me for it? Shit, Dave, why didn't you say so in the first place?
    Dave: Solid, man.
  • The entirety of Roman's kidnapping.
  • Johnny's random banter while wandering around the city:
    When jacking a car: "Time to start car shoppin'!" "If you would be so kind, sir."
    Running over a pedestrian: "That's gonna come back to bite me on the ass, karmicly speakin'." "IT'S NOT YOUR DAY!"
    Shooting someone: "When words just aren't enough..."
    When his car dies: "C'mon, start for Johnny." (Apparently directed at the player): "Good for you. You wrecked it."
    Pointing a gun at someone: "How's your day goin'?"
    After a random act of violence: "What is wrong with me!?"

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