Funny / Gun

  • In the mission immediately after her death, there are multiple groups of Hoodoo Brown's goons that Colton must sneak up on. Some of them, when you get close enough to them, will sing a song called "Old Jenny,"
    There once was a Dodge City Maid, who was a whore by trade
    For a buck and a wax, she'd lie on her back
    And let skinny cowboys poke at her craaaaack,
    One day, to her surprise, her belly began to rise,
    And her slit gave a grunt, and out jumped a runt
    With balls between his eyeeeees!
  • At the beginning of the mission where you have to defend Port as he pushes the cannon through Empire City, two of the Resistance show how...anxious they were for your arrival.
    Resistance Member: It's about time you showed up! Jones here was about to shit himself!
  • Setting people on fire can result in some hilarious responses.
    "Water! Water! Somebody piss on me or somethin'! AAAAAAAGGGHH!"
  • One of the Bounty Hunter missions involves killing a horse rustler to get a prized horse back. When you return the horse to its owner, the owner tells you that the bounty was nothing compared to the price he'll get for the horse at the glue factory.