Funny / Fifty Shades of Grey

The novels

  • For the interview, Kate had planned to ask Grey if he was gay, for no apparent reason.
  • In Fifty Shades Darker, Ana and Christian go to Jose's art show. To their surprise, several people recognize Ana and they soon find out why: an entire wall is dedicated to photos of her (that she didn't know existed) (this part is, by the way, blatant plagiarism of Blue Is the Warmest Color). Christian immediately purchases every picture.
  • A lot of the writing in general is of hilariously poor quality:
    • Any time the phrase "inner goddess" is uttered. Among the things it does is a "salsa merengue," and waving pom-poms like a cheerleader, and it is once said to be like someone who has had an ice-cream snatched from it.
    • There's also the line from Fifty Shades Darker: "My inner goddess is doing a triple axel dismount from the uneven bars." "Triple axel" is a jump in figure skating. Dismounting the uneven bars is done in gymnastics.
    • Every time the "subconscious" is mentioned. Interestingly, the "subconscious" isn't really her subconscious, because she's clearly aware what the subconscious is doing (such as wearing half-moon spectacles) which is fully conscious.
    • Every time Ana goes "Oh my!" or "Holy crap!" and wants to masturbate at the sight of Christian Grey.
    • Every time a foil packet (euphemism for condom) is mentioned during a sex scene.
    • Every time a euphemism for vulva is used, e.g. "my sex" or "down there."
    • Every time a euphemism for penis is used, e.g. "incredible length".
    • "I would like to bite that lip."
    • Christian's explanation for why he does BDSM: "Because I'm fifty shades of fucked up, Ana!" You don't say, Chris. You don't say.
    • "Moving down, I push him into my mouth. He groans again. Ha! My inner goddess is thrilled. I can do this. I can fuck him with my mouth."
      • "My very own Christian Grey-flavored popsicle."
    • "I'm a ho with dirty sex hair."
    • "His eyebrows widened in surprise."
    • Ana's mental response to the news that she just had "vanilla sex" with Grey: "I thought it was chocolate fudge brownie sex that we had, with a cherry on the top."
    • "He reaches between my legs and pulls on the blue stringwhat?!and gently pulls my tampon out and tosses it into the nearby toilet. Holy fuck. Sweet mother of all… Jeez. And then he’s inside me."
    • In the beginning of the first novel, Ana is using Grey's toothbrush on purpose. It's supposed to convey her physical longing for him, but it comes off as disgusting rather than sexy/romantic. When she later tells him about it, for absolutely no reason at all, he's pleased by it.
      Ana: I feel so naughty.
    • The fact that the author obviously isn't familiar with the BDSM subculture.
    • There seem to be fake quotes, or maybe they're real, that people enjoy posting. Among the most infamous is "do I afraid you?" Christian Grey asked, licking his eyebrow. There is fanart of it.

Meta

  • Various celebrities reading it. The book has become prime Snark Bait this way:
    • TFS and Doug Walker reading it is completely hilarious with all of them doing either one of their (famous) roles or impersonating different characters.
    • The George Takei one is particularly amusing, since he shares a Catch-Phrase with the narrator. The one with Morgan Freeman (sorta ) also includes some pretty hilarious commentary.
    Ana: I like your kinky fuckery.
    "Morgan Freeman": Yeah, more like bullshit douchery.
    …"Or something"? You're the fucking author! You get to decide what that "or something" is; that's part of your job while writing a book! Like she's just sitting there, writing, and she was like: "His voice w- I'm hungry for dessert, what does a voice sound like? …Eh, you'll figure it out!"
    • Rooster Teeth had reading a passage as one of their goals whenever they hit a certain milestone for Extra Life '15. They did it three times. The first time is read straight. The second time is read by Lindsay Jones as RWBY's Ruby Rose. The third time? Read by Matt Hullum as Red vs. Blue's Sarge.
      • Lindsay as Ruby is funnier as Lindsay doesn't like having her character cuss, thus she invokes Gosh Darn It to Heck!, leading to Christian to declare "I don't make love. I truck. Hard."
  • When The Movie came out, the folks at Honest Trailers poked fun at it.
    Ana: What's a butt-plug?
    Voice: It's a plug… for your butt.
  • This parody of the novel, which does an excellent job of recreating its poor writing.
  • In a similarly meta moment of funny, John Oliver would like to be considered to play Christian Grey. Despite having no idea what the book is about.
  • E. L. James attempted a Twitter question-and-answer session. It went poorly.
    "Did you write intentionally badly so people would suffer pain, but discover they enjoy it?"
    "Which do you hate more, women or the English language?"
    "#AskELJames I need advice on making a BIG romantic gesture. Should I put a GPS tracker in her phone and make threats if she tries to leave?"
    "#AskELJames what's it like telling millions of women it's okay to be in an abusive relationship as long as he's rich. Asking for a friend."
    "#AskELJames Can you confirm that you will be writing the story of Ramsay Bolton from his perspective, showing he is just misunderstood?"
  • The movie received either the highest, or near-highest ratings even in countries lenient towards sexual content like the Netherlands, Germany or Scandinavia. In France, the movie only got a 12 rating (the next lowest is Sweden and Denmark with a 15 rating, which is still the highest rating in those countries). And then the fact that the Media Watchdog of France thought the rating was too high and deserved the equivalent of an All-ages rating. Let that sink in for a minute.
    • Alternatively, the fact that France rated it so low isn't so much a commentary on French cultural values as it is a commentary on the movie itself.
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