Funny: E.T. the Extra-Terrestrial

  • Elliott's "It was nothing like that, penis breath!"
    • The fact that Elliott's mom laughs as she tries to reprimand him.
  • When E.T. falls into the bath tub... He doesn't drown, of course.
  • E.T. screaming at the Tom and Jerry cartoon on the TV and throwing a beer can at it.
  • The botched frog dissection scene is full of these.
    • When Elliott first releases his frog, "Run for your life! Back to the river, back to the forest! Run! I gotta save you!"
    • The fact that none of the other students are trying to help or hinder, they just sit at their lab tables chanting "back to the river, back to the forest!".
    • When he tries to free the "big kids" frog, and the boy naturally resists.
    • One pigtailed girl just standing there holding a frog in each hand while chaos erupts around her.
    • The two boys scaring the one girl by placing their frogs on her feet.
    • Elliott's reenactment of the John Wayne movie E.T. is watching.
  • Big brother Michael needs to get his priorities straight.
    Michael: We're all gonna die and they're never gonna give me my license!
  • The whole "Most Excellent Promise" scene.
    Elliott: Come on, Michael, he came back.
    Michael: (feigning shock) He came back? He came back? (pretends to be attacked) Oh, my God!
    Elliott: One thing. I have absolute power. Say it. Say it!
    Michael: What have you got? Is it the coyote?
    Elliott: No. Look. O.K. Now, swear it. The most excellent promise you can make. Swear as my only brother on our lives!
    Michael: Don't get so heavy. I swear.
    Elliott: Okay, stand over there. And you'd better take off your shoulder pads.
    Michael: WHAT?!
    Elliott: You might scare him. And close your eyes.
    Michael: Don't push it, Elliott.
    Elliott: I'm not coming out until your eyes are closed.
    Michael: Okay, they're closed. Mom is going to kill you. Eeeeghh!
    Elliott: Okay, swear it one more time. I have—
    Michael: (Interrupts, impersonating Yoda) You have absolute power, yes! Eeheeheehee!
  • When poor drunk E.T. gets hit with the refrigerator door.
    Gertie: Here he is!
    Mary: Here's who?
    Gertie: The man from the moon, but I think you've killed him already.
    • Gertie is like a walking funny moment. Everywhere she goes something hilarious happens.
  • Elliot tries to keep E.T. concealed after his revival:
    E.T.: ET phone home! ET phone home! ET phone home!
    Elliot: (whispering) Will you shut up!
  • It's Halloween and E.T. sees a kid dressed as Yoda... and recognizes him.
    (waddling after the kid) Home! Home!
  • Gertie being scared of E.T. the first time she sees him, with E.T. being equally scared of her.
  • ET trying to fix the costume knife in Michael's head, then being knocked over by the camera flash.
  • ET crashing the bike after Elliott hopes he won't.
  • It's really subtle and hard to hear, but when Elliott is grabbing his jar with the frog in it, you can hear a kid say "Let's put some chloroform on the teacher."
  • Gertie's reaction when Elliot claims only kids can see E.T.:
    Gertie: Give me a break!
  • When Elliot tells Michael that E.T. is alive again, he gets so overwhelmed with joy that he jumps up and accidentally hits his head on the ceiling.
  • Elliot belching after E.T. chugs a can of Coors.