History Funny / Dinosaurs

* This dialogue from '[[JustForPun What Sexu-Al Harris Meant]]'. Earl has just been told by Fran to help Monica get the tree-pushing job at Wesayso;

-->'''Baby:''' Give me a cookie!\\

-->'''Ethyl:''' [reading road map] According to this map, we've wandered completely out of known civilization. We've passed the Mysterious Gorge and the River of Blood and now we're deep in the heart of the Valley of the... Roosters.\\

-->'''Earl''': This is one of those moments in life that's just miserable and rotten for every one of us.\\

'''Ethyl''': (singing) Happy days are here again! My daughter's free from fat boy! My daughter's free from fat boy! Happy days are here again!

-->''Blarney at the Zoo''\\
''Blarney on the Farm''\\
''Blarney on the Bottom of the Ocean''\\
''Blarney Just Sits There''\\
''Blarney Reads From the Phone Book''\\
''Blarney and Creator/OmarSharif Teach You Contract Bridge''\\
''Blarney Improves Your Golf Swing''\\
''Hooked on Blarney''\\
''Blarney's No-Money-Down Real Estate System''\\
''Blarney Helps You Stop Stop Smoking''\\
''Blarney Increases Your Personal Power''\\
''Blarney's Juice Your Way to Better Health''\\
''Blarney Helps you Organize Your Blarney Video Tapes''\\
''Blarney! Blarney! Blarney!''\\
''Blarney's Greatest Bloopers''\\
''The Making of Blarney''\\
''Blarney's Cure for Baldness''\\
''Blarney's Search for Noah's Ark''\\
''Blarney Teaches You UsefulNotes/MicrosoftWindows''\\
''Blarney's Forty Days to a Flatter Stomach''

-->'''Earl''': there's my little ''Megalosaurus''. Daddy loves you. Daddy proved it, by buying very expensive medicine for you. No more being sick. No more doctors.\\

'''Hallucination!Earl''': No more ''juice''! No more ''food''! No more ''fun''! We're going to make you wear tight, scratchy diapers! And take you to a big, scary department store and ''leave you there''! ''(laughs evilly)''\\

'''Earl''': Hey, Fran. Come look at the kid. I think he's feeling a whole lot better.\\
'''Fran''': I don't know, Earl. I'm not so sure.\\

'''Hallucination!Fran''': And I'm also [[IronicEcho not the mama!]]\\
'''Hallucination!Earl''': And I'm not the ''papa''!\\
'''Hallucination!Charlene''': We ate your real family for breakfast! Haha!\\
'''Hallucination!Robbie''': And now we're gonna eat '''YOU'''! HAHAHA!

-->'''Guy:''' ''Sickness, be cured! The Guy In The Woods commands it!'' ''(Nothing)'' ''COMMANDS IT!'' ''(Still nothing. Guy looks up tiredly)'' Wisdom? ''(KRAKOOM!)''

--->'''Creature 1''': "Civilization is filled with bizarre concepts. That's why I've always steered clear of it."
--->'''Creature 2''': "Me too!"
--->'''Creature 1''': "Why did you leave?"
--->'''Baby Sinclair''': "Daddy made me go potty! ''(the creatures groan in sympathy and shake their heads)'' Yeah."
--->'''Creature 2''': "What's a potty?"
--->'''Creature 1''': "Well, another affectation of the civilized world. You see, apparently when nature calls you've got to go to this one particular room and sit in a special chair."
--->'''Creature 2''': "You're making this up!"
--->'''Creature 1 and Baby Sinclair''': "Nope."
--->'''Creature 1''': "Wait, wait, wait. It's even more peculiar than that. Everyone uses the same chair! ''(everyone groans in disgust)''"
--->'''Creature 2''': "What about when you've gotta go and someone's already using the chair?"
--->'''Creature 1''': "Well, then you have to wait."
--->'''Creature 2''': "But what if you ''can't'' wait?!"
--->'''Creature 1''': "You ''have'' to!"

--> Earl: Come on, cut it out!
--> Lunch couple: *Looks at him* Hump! *Started kissing each other and Earl slammed the lid shut.*
--> Earl: They didn't even know each other before I defrosted them.

-->'''Baby''': [[DeadpanSnarker That's the vacuum cleaner!!]]

-->'''Monster''': And it took me '''8''' years to get the permit!!!

-->'''Police chief''': Hey there, monster. Ever share a hot cocoa with your dad?\\
'''Monster''': (''gasps'') Yeah... Yeah I did! Wow, that really brings back memories! [[HopeSpot Seems like you really understand!]]\\
'''Police chief''': You're right monster, we care so darn much... [[SuddenlyShouting NOW RELEASE THOSE KIDS, DIRTBAG!!]] Or we'll come down there and turn you off like a light switch!\\
'''Monster''': If I go, they go with me!!\\
'''Police chief''': You don't have the guts! [[TemptingFate Do it!]] Do it!\\
'''Monster''': Okay! (''begins hastily preparing his stew'')\\
'''Police chief''': [[HypocriticalHumor He's clearly unstable!]] (''cops cock their guns'')\\
'''Howard Handupme''': And it appears that negotiations have broken down between the police and the monster, and we are inching ever close to an almost inevitable firestorm.

-->'''Police chief''': Gets us home by 6.

-->'''Fran''': Earl, if you want a third child again, there's only one thing to do.\\
'''Earl''': [[ComicallyMissingThePoint Aw geeze, Fran, I'm not in the mood]]. 'Course, I could get in the mood. Couple o' cocktails. Rub my back.\\
'''Fran''': Go get our son and bring him back.

-->"Coming up next, it's The Smoo Show!"
-->"We're sayin' Smoo / 'cause it's what we do / We're sayin' Smoo / and it's just for you / Smoo smoo smoo smoo smoooooooooo!"

--> "Oops! [[{{DidNotThinkThisThrough}} The ice got a little bit warm]], so now all we have is... wet sticks."

* ''Monster Under The Bed'' has the Police getting ready to charge into battle with the titular monster under the bed, only for a commercial break to happen promoting cotton candy to happen. Everyone from The Police, the Monster, even Robbie and Charlene who are stuck in cages and Baby who's in a cooking pot sing along to it.

-->"Darn."

* The rules introduced to keep television clean. "Words that sound like '[[InformedObscenity smoo]]' are also prohibited. The number two shall now be replaced with 'not-one'. A female with the name Sue will now be referred to as Millie, and cows should not say 'moo' anymore; instead, they should be encouraged to speak in complete sentences."

* One "ride" at "Wesaysoworld" [[CrappyCarnival was literally just a cardboard box]]. Charlene goes inside, and the attendant pushes the box over. Charlene's "Ouch!" sells it.

-->'''Earl''': No more being sick. No more doctors.\\

'''Hallucination!Fran''': And I'm also not the mama!\\

* The [[ShowWithinAShow "Exploding Cop" segments]] particularly with how they [[EscalatingPunchline escalate with the bad things happening to him]], ending with him well, [[ExactlyWhatItSaysOnTheTin exploding.]]

--> "Oops! [[{{DidNotThinkThisThrough}} The ice got a little bit warm]], [[{{RealityEnsues}}so now all we have is... wet sticks]]."

'''Earl''': [[ComicallyMissingThePoint Aw geeze, Fran, I'm not in the mood]]. [[GettingCrapPastTheRadar 'Course, I could get in the mood. Couple o' cocktails. Rub my back]].\\

* Many of the Dino TV show spots seen throughout the series.

''Blarney and Creator/OmarSharif Teach You Contact Bridge''\\

''Blarney Teaches You Microsoft Windows''\\

** The visit to The Guy In The Woods is a riot too, as the Guy's SFX department clearly aren't paying attention when it comes for the DramaticLightning.

'''Richfield:''' ''(Sees Monica)'' Ahh, you brought me a female. Nice gesture. Thing is, I already have a wife.\\

'''Richfield:''' WHAT!? A female tree-pusher!? You can't be serious, that's ludicrous! You're a laughingstock!\\
'''Earl:''' Just as I predicted.

** Baby being named "[[{{ItMakesSenseInContext}} Aaah Augh I'm Dying You Idiot]]".

--> "Oops! The ice got a little bit warm, so now all we have is... wet sticks."

* The zoo's attempt to breed Ling Ling and Chang Chang, two "rare, imported humans" that are both very obviously male. Said attempt involves placing them in a cage together and poking "Ling Ling" with a stick.

* The Blarney Home Video Library commercial from "Into the Woods".

* The [[ShowWithinAShow "Exploding Cop" segments]] particularly with how they [[EscalatingPunchline escalate with the bad things happening to him.]]

* One "ride" at "Wesaysoworld" was literally just a cardboard box. Charlene goes inside, and the attendant pushes the box over. Charlene's "Ouch!" sells it.

* In "The Last Temptation of Ethyl", Ethyl is watching the grass grow...[[{{LiteralMetaphor}} on]] [[{{Creator/ESPN}} DSPN]] complete with [=PGA=]-style Color Commentary.

* In "The Last Temptation of Ethyl", Ethyl is watching the grass grow...[[{{LiteralMetaphor}} on]] [[{{Creator/ESPN}} DSPN]] complete with [=PGA=]-style Color Commentary.