Funny / Diabetus

Captain Novolin
  • The LPers pretending to not know anything about diabetes.
    • The group making various Double Entendres about "BGs" (the game's abbreviation for blood glucose).
  • slowbeef's increasingly hysterical reactions to the game's idiocy are always good for a laugh.
  • Their increasingly horrified reactions to the Uncanny Valley female doctor. As for the male doctor, Scarboy reads all his dialogue in a Carl Winslow voice.
  • The licorice whip aliens they dub "Twizzler Demons."
  • This memetic exchange from the beginning of level 6:
    Captain Novolin: Hello Ranger. I have diabetes. Is there anything special I should know before climbing the mountain?
    Diabetus: Dude, you gotta think of a better ice breaker than that. (slowbeef laughs)
    Ranger Betty: Thanks for telling me.
    slowbeef: "Thanks for telling me?!" (...) I have herpes, is there anything I should know before climbing the mountain?" "Thanks for telling me!" Yeah!
    • Then, immediately after:
    Text box: Check you feet for...
    slowbeef: WHAT?!... Check you feet! (cracks up)
    Diabetus: No guys, do it! Guys, do it right now! Like, right now!
    Scarboy: Wait— wait, it said "Check you feet..."
    slowbeef: (in a country voice) "CHECK YOU FEET BEFORE CLIMBIN' THIS MOUNTAIN."
    (Novolin crouches to avoid a "Twizzler Demon"; his pose looks like he's staring at his foot)
    slowbeef: And you did! (howls with laughter)
    • Shortly afterwards, they take notice of Captain Novolin's damage animation, where he kneels and clutches his stomach.
    slowbeef: I like how he gets dizzy whenever he gets attacked, and holds his stomach.
    Diabetus: Well, he just got attacked with sugar, I guess.
    Scarboy: Whenever he gets hit, I think he looks like a giant pansy. He's like, "Oh no, you just hit me in the stomach!"
    Diabetus: "Uuurrgh, That really hurts, ugh!"
    slowbeef: "I'm nauseous from fighting, guys!"
    Scarboy: "Stop hurting me!"
  • Level 7 manages to top this somehow:
    Captain Novolin: Whew, what a hike. Hi, Ranger Ralph. I am looking for the mayor. But just in case I get into some trouble, I want to let you know that I have diabetes.
    (everyone laughs, slowbeef especially hard)
    Diabetus: Wait, what's in the—
    (the screen fades to show a certificate)
    Certificate: I HAVE DIABETES - If I am found ill or fainting, please give me some sugar. If this does not revive me, please call a doctor or an ambulance immediately.
    (slowbeef begins laughing with renewed vigor)
    Diabetus: This is like... this is like a college diploma! What is this?
    (slowbeef continues laughing)
    Diabetus: Does he like, strap that to his chest so when he faints, people can see it?
    Ranger Ralph: Thanks.
    slowbeef: "THANKS?!"
    Diabetus: I imagine he's saying that really awkwardly, like, "Thaaanks..."
    slowbeef: Oh my god, you've got a certificate!!
  • slowbeef misunderstands the final level's question:
    "This video game is quizzing you on why it's good to eat?!"
  • The final boss of the game: a strange, middle-aged-looking man with a headset who sits in a chair and fires pies at the player, and dies in three hits from electricity activated by a nearby switch. slowbeef's hysterical reaction, again, makes the video.

Metroid: Fusion
  • Diabetus struggling through PYR, while slowbeef mocks him for constantly falling down the same crackle block every time.
    (the video jump cuts after Diabetus falls down the block; Diabetus is approaching the block again)
    slowbeef: So it's not just me being horribl- NO! DON'T GO THAT WAY!
  • Diabetus flipping out in the NOC sector every time he sees a blue X parasite, while slowbeef watches to his amusement.
    Diabetus: I think I'm gonna wait until I downloAAAAAGH!
    • Earlier:
      (Diabetus enters a room chock-full of blue X parasites)
      Diabetus: JESUS CHRIST! (dashes back out of the room)
    • In the same video, Diabetus' reaction to a Chest Monster:
      Diabetus: What the fuck?! Are you kidding me?
      slowbeef: (cracking up) I forgot all about that!
      Diabetus: Really? An evil missile pack?
    • The last few minutes of the video, where the pair have an inane argument about semantics.
    • Diabetus is not pleased with the color palette of the new Varia Suit:
      Diabetus: Pfff—What... is that? (...) Is she wearing clown pants, what is that?
  • Diabetus forgetting to save after Yakuza and losing progress.
    (the save file loads, clearly before the fight)
    Both: Uhhhhhh...
    • In the next video, Diabetus fights through That One Level with slowbeef alternating between mocking him and insisting they're gonna edit stuff out, right down to Diabetus doing introductions every time he dies and restarts. Bonus points for a few well-placed Description Cuts to his off-screen rematch with Yakuza.
  • Slowbeef's persistent Late to the Punchline moments caused by the stream lag.
  • Everything about the logistics of the Sector 3 meltdown crisis. Diabetus and slowbeef eventually conclude that the Lava Clam from Metroid Prime was attempting suicide and Taking You with Me.
  • During Diabetus' first venture in Sector 4, he ponders on the pointlessness of a small wall-ladder by an adjacent wall, thinking it goaded him into trying to find a secret on said wall. As he leaves after finding a missile upgrade not there, but nearby, slowbeef asks him, "Did you try missiles? You only have seventy." Diabetus replied, "I gotta conserve, y'know." And then rapid-fires nineteen on the wall before concluding there's nothing there.
    slowbeef: Did you try, like, ten missiles?
    slowbeef: [seeing delayed footage] Wow, you really did.

Super Mario Galaxy 2
  • He opens every single video of the LP with a head or face related pun without fail (barring episodes which don't open with the Face Ship).
  • The first video opens up with Diabetus narrating in a calm, soothing voice while trying (and failing) to not casually curse.

Dark Souls
  • Diabetus spends a rather significant portion of the game using a mixture of the Elite Knight Gear and the Holy Trousers, making it appear as if his badass, god killing knight, is wearing parachute pants.