- After Ryuk's presence has been acknowledged by several people:
Light: Ryuk, what the hell?! You said no one could see you!
Ryuk: Well, nobody ever talks to me, so naturally I assumed...
- Light explains how he is going to hide the Death Note:
Ryuk: You know, I've been sitting here for hours listen to you talk.
Light: Wanna know how I plan to hide the Death Note?
Ryuk: Uh, no?
- cue to Light going on a needlessly and implausible on how he plans to hide it*
Ryuk: Oh God, is he still talking?
Light: explains further You get all that, Ryuk?
Ryuk: I'm sure whatever you just said to me will become important for later episodes.
- The Take That! to 4Kids Entertainment:
Raye: We're here to censor you. American kids can't handle all this killing. Let's see take out all the killings, rework the plot (that goes without saying), insert some friendship speeches...
- The running gags on L's quirky habits:
Matsuda: Dude, what's your problem?
L: I have diabetes.
Matsuda: Then maybe you shouldn't use that much sugar...
L: Excuse me, WHICH one of us has diabetes?!
Light: Why are you sitting like that?
L: I have scoliosis.
Light: Ever think maybe it's because you sit like that?
- Light is invited to taskforce headquarters:
Matsuda: Heh, look at him, pretending not to be Kira. He's probably trying to kill me with his mind, right now.
- "Attention, faggot: My Mustache is telling you to shut your f*cking mouth!"
- "We're out of cake."
- Light admits that he "could" be Kira:
Light, for being Kira, and squandering our family's reputation, you' re grounded
Light: I suppose it can't be helped. I don't even deserve to be called a "Yagami"...
Souichiro: Damn straight, you don't!
Light: Ryuuzaki! You've got to let me out of here!
L: You've only been in there for twenty-five minutes.
L: Hey Light, you all right? We remembered to feed him, right guys?
- When L is fed up dealing with the people around him:
L: *thinking* I'm surrounded by complete morons!
- Light and L are chained together:
Misa: Wait, you like this don't you! My boyfriend is GAY!
- Ryuk's Spaceland T-shirt.
- After Light's mother asks him if he wants dinner
Ooh, I know! You could take one of my potato chips...and eat it!
Light: SHUT THE F*CK UP, THAT'S NEVER BEEN FUNNY!
- In episode 14, before and during the chain fist fight:
L: *sigh* Last night.
Light: What was that?
L: Oh, yeah. Just pretend you don't know!
Light: Y-you see, this is the problem! You don't open up for me.
L: Everytime I do open up for you, you hurt me.
- After Light punches L across the room, we have this little gem:
Light: I'm sick of this emo attitude of yours! Why don't you just go cry to your parents!? OH, WAIT! YOU DON'T HAVE ANY PARENTS, DO YOU!?
- It might be even funnier, if you know that in the real series, L is an orphan.
- From the Christmas Comment Special:
Watari: (offscreen) L! I got you all the Fruits Basket episodes on VHS, like you begged me for.
L: Aw, fuck yeah!
Light: *singsong* Gayyyyy...
L: Oh, I'm gay? Why don't you try spelling your last name backwards?
Light: Hmm... "Yagami". I'm... a... ga- (beat) Oh, you son of of bitch!
Light: Hey isn't my father supposed to be reading these with me?
-Cue Ambulance Driving away-
Sorichiro: Fucking MATSUDA!!!!
- The theater scene in Episode 8.
- Sorichiro tries to kill Light… over a chicken sandwich.
- Instead of it being a blank, the real reason Sorichiro doesn't end up killing him is because he missed.
Sorichiro: What kind of cop am I? I can't even shoot my own son in the face at point-blank range.
Light: That's okay, dad. The important thing is that you tried.
- Light's dysfunctional family during Thanksgiving.
Light's mother: Honey, you're finally home!
Sorichiro: I want a divorce.
- And what Ryuk says afterward.
Ryuk: Dude, no wonder you have so many problems.
Light:(with crazy eyes) What problems?