Funny: Boston Public

  • Harvey's Rousing Speech to his female students about wearing a bra for the good of the country.
    Harvey: All through history, when men look at women, they want to have sex. Now, God did this on purpose to ensure the survival of the human species. And he also gave women lumps, known as "breasts," to inspire in man the penile urge to procreate. Now, this was very good for mankind, but not for womankind. Now, how could she succeed in this world, and how could she be respected for all her values, when men just want to mount her? Research eventually showed that it was those dangling, bouncing breasts that cause special excitement to the man's blood flow. It was determined that the brassiere could stop this dangling, bouncing motion. The man would be less likely to objectify the woman and she would have a fighting chance at equality. You must harness your bosoms in order to squash the discrimination by the male gonads. This country can never maximize its potential until you can achieve equality. That's why I must make a rule, right here and right now: wear a bra, for the good of the country.
    • And in response to that speech, the girls take off their bras and hang them on their lockers.
      Guber: What's going on?
      Harry: Lipschitz told the female students to wear bras for the good of the country. Turns out they're all a bunch of Communist sluts.
      Guber: You think this is funny, Mr. Senate?
      Harry: I can never do anything right.
  • In the third episode, Harvey gives yet another Rousing Speech, this time to the football players about their teammate whom they suspect is gay.
    Harvey: When I was a young boy, there was this baseball player, and the players didn't want him to play because he was different. But when he finally did make it into the game, they found that he could hit and run and catch better than all of them. His name was Jackie Robinson. And he paved the way for the black man to get into the game of baseball, making it a better game. What if it were to turn out that this homosexual could run faster, hit harder, and throw that football straighter? We won't know that. We won't know that unless that first team of courage invites him to join the game. And I would like to think that that team of courage lives right here at Winslow High. Gentlemen, there is nothing more American than football. Be proud. Welcome the gay linebacker into your shower!
    • This:
      Kevin: Think before you speak, Harvey.
      Marla: Then he'd be mute.
    • This exchange:
      Harry: Jamal, what do you want to be when you grow up?
      Jamaal: (smirks) Not a teacher.
      Harry: "Not a teacher." You know, as a teacher, it would be inappropriate for me to tell you that you're a total screw-up. So what I want you to do is go home and ask your father, as a favor to me, to tell you that you're a total screw-up.
    • Harry popping a balloon next to a girl's ear, and the girl snapping awake and yelling "GUN!"
  • In one episode, Harry convinces one of his truant students to come back to school by allowing him to teach in the Dungeon for a day. What topic does the student decide to teach? "Pre. Mature. Ejacu. Lation." Harry is not pleased; he even gives the student a Dope Slap.
  • The episode with Verne Troyer. Guber, who spends most of the episode trying to figure out how underachieving students are suddenly passing tests, is suddenly hit with a realization, rushes out of his office, and heads to a student's locker, all while the Munchkin Song plays. Said song reaches its highest point as Guber opens the locker to find Troyer's character. The look on Guber's face is absolutely hilarious.
    • Before that moment, Guber disguises himself a rabbi in order to spy on one of the students. He turns around to spot Steven standing there, looking at him.
      Guber: I'm undercover!
      Steven: I can see that.
      Guber: This is a very delicate operation. Go away. I'll explain later.
      (Steven just rolls his eyes and walks off. Danny comes around the corner and pats Scott on the shoulder.)
      Guber: How's it hanging, Scott?
      (Scott looks disappointed his disguise isn't working.)
    • When Marla confronts Guber over his rabbi disguise, Guber defensively insists he was unrecognizable, leading to this line from Marla:
      Marla: Well, maybe if it was someone dressed as you dressed as a silly old rabbi, but everybody's laughing, Scott!
    • Marla then confronts the little man, who proceeds to stomp on her foot. Guber has to restrain Marla from retaliating against the little man while Steven does likewise with the little man.
    • Harvey comes into Guber's office to rant and complain about something when he looks, spots the little man (who had been talking to Guber moments earlier), and jumps in surprise. Harvey and the dwarf take a moment to size each other up before Harvey points at the little man and utters to Guber, "It's a trick."
    • This exchange between Guber and Steven about the little man:
      Guber: The little man's been spotted on school grounds. I've put out an all-points bulletin.
      Steven: How'd he get past security?
      Guber: Went right under them!
  • The Reveal that Zach Fischer became a Buddhist after slugging Dave Fields for kissing Ronnie.