Funny: Bill Bailey

  • His "Cockney Rock" version of Bela Lugosi's Dead.
  • U2 impression: "Hello! Some old Celtic bollocks!"
  • 'The Scale of Evil': "Evil! Taxi! Evil! Taxi!"... "Moooody evil!"
  • His techno remix of the Hokey Cokey!
  • Reading 'A Brief History of Time' like a Jane Austen novel:
    "'Ah, Mr Knightley, I am confused and not a little annoyed. It seems that even non-rotating black holes create and emit particles at a steady rate.' 'Oh, tush and fie, Emma. Quantum mechanics tells us the particles are created just outside the black hole's event horizon.' 'Oh, Mr Knightley, my synapses are shutting down.'"
    • Applying the Austen treatment to a Tom Clancy novel:
    "'Oh, Mr Darcy, I thank you for the gift of the Uzi.' 'My dear Elizabeth, with its light-weight barrel and high rate of fire it is indeed one of the most sought after light weapons in the world.' 'Oh, Mr Darcy, you da man.'"
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