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Funny: Beetlejuice

Film:

  • Betelgeuse answering Barbara and Adam's question about his qualifications...
    Betelgeuse: (calm, plain voice) Ah. Well, I attended Juilliard. I'm a graduate of the Harvard Business School. I travel quite extensively. (returns to character's normal voice) I lived through the Black Plague and had a pretty good time during that! (chewing scenery) I've seen The Exorcist ABOUT A HUNDRED AND SIXTY-SEVEN TIMES, AND IT KEEPS GETTING FUNNIER EVERY SINGLE TIME I SEE IT! NOT TO MENTION THE FACT THAT YOU'RE TALKING TO A DEAD GUY!!! NOW WHAT DO YOU THINK?!? ...you think I'm qualified?
    • The following scene where Betelgeuse gets asked "Are you scary?"
    Betelgeuse: What do you think of this?
    (camera shifts behind him as something happens to his face as it explodes)
    (Barbara and Adam both freak out)
    Betelgeuse (back to normal): You like it?
    • Also a "blink-and-you'll-miss-it" moment where after Adam asks if Betelgeuse can be scary, he turns around and subtly insults Adam by calling him a "jerkoff" by making a jerking motion with his hand.
  • The scene in which Betelgeuse kicks a tree in the model and knocks it over before yelling "Nice fucking model!" and grabbing himself in a rather obscene way. I was laughing so hard from the "Honk Honk" sound effects.
    • Especially the straight face he makes while he goes "Honk Honk".
  • "I would rather talk about--" DAY-O, DAY-O
  • "Attention, K-Mart shoppers!" Keaton's face sells it.
  • This scene:
    Barbara: Betelgeuse.
    Betelgeuse: Eeeeeeeeeee!
    (Betelgeuse throws a zipper on her mouth. She unzips her lip.)
    Barbara: Betelgeuse!
    Betelgeuse: Ah geez! (throws a metal plate on her mouth) Strike!
  • The Shout-Out to The Fly.
  • Betelgeuse trying to sneak a peak under Barbara's dress by lifting it with a tree branch.
  • Delia: Open this door, you dead people, or we'll bust it down and we'll drag you out by the ropes you hang yourselves with!
    Lydia: Shh! They didn't commit suicide.
    Delia: It doesn't matter. [Lydia rolls her eyes] Lydia, I have a chance to teach you something here: you have got to take the upper hand in all situations or people, whether they're dead or alive, will walk all over you.
  • Delia's rant when her husband Charles tries to stop her from renovating the humble home:
    Delia: I'm here with you. I will live with you in this hellhole, but I must express myself. If you don't let me GUT OUT this house and MAKE IT MY OWN, I will go INSANE, and I WILL TAKE YOU WITH ME!
    (Ortho just stands there smirking)
    Charles (horrified): Uh well you know, maybe the house could use a little remodeling. Uh... But, why don't you just leave this room alone, okay?
    Delia (sweetly): Okay! (walks through the room)
    (Charles snarls behind her back and clenches his fist at Delia)
    Barbara (having watched it all in her ghostly state): I'm gonna get her.

Cartoon:


BeerfestFunny/FilmBehind the Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon

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