Funny / Balto


  • The ET reference Star makes in the ice cavern.
    • Star getting punched out every time by Kaltag.
  • Steele shows up to taunt Balto about not making the team.
    Steele: Didn't make the team, Bingo?
    Boris: Don't look at him, don't listen to him. Live a long life.
    Balto: My name's Balto!
    Boris: But you can call him "idiot".
  • Boris trying to cheer up Balto. Especially the extremely random dance at the end.
    • It's not exactly a "random" dance. Boris is a Russian goose and commonly refers to Russia as "old country", so it wouldn't be too far-fetched that he'd know a folk dance. He knows how silly he looks while exaggerating it.
    • And then there's the face Balto makes after the dance is over. It looks like 'wow, even that didn't make me feel better'.
  • While it may come off as Narm to some, the look on Boris' face when he gazes up at the grizzly is epically priceless.
  • Boris in general has plenty of funny lines.
    • It's even funnier when you watch the sequence leading up to that. After Balto decides to go after Steele and his team, the movie cuts to a goose shaped hole in the snow, indicating that Boris has been trying to talk him out of this crazy stunt for awhile.
    Boris: Balto, please, don't go crazy on me now! Ah! (falls, gets back up) This is foolishness! You will die like a dog! Ooh, no offense.(Falls through a hole in a drainage pipe, but continues to yell at Balto before emerging from the pipe and landing on the ice, while Muk and Luk are sliding on the ice right behind him) You will be frozen stiff by morning! When you are big frozen statue named "Balto", don't come running to me! (The bears hit him, taking him down the ice with them, and Luk asks where Balto's going))
    Muk: He says-
    Boris: (interupting) "Where is he going?" He's going into freezing coldness to find a dog he doesn't like and bring back medicine to a town that doesn't like him! OH, NO! I'M BEGINNING TO UNDERSTAND THE BEAR!
    • And when he decides to help Balto, we get this:
    Boris: So, let's go get the medicine.
    Balto: Wait a minute, now you're coming?
    Boris: Spending days in bitter cold, facing wild animals, risking death from exposure (laughs) is like holiday in old country.
    • In the aftermath of the grizzly fight, when hugging Balto, he gives us this:
    Boris: Oh, Balto! I was so scared I got people bumps!
    • Even funnier, as he muses on Balto and Jenna cuddling together, Luk ruins the moment by shaking himself dry, and the drops fly all over Boris. If Luk smiling innocently and all poofy doesn't make you laugh, Boris' next line will.
    Boris: "I HATE BEARS!"
    • And this was after the fight with the grizzly.
  • Muk's Memetic Mutation: "Uncle Boooorrrrriiiiiss!"
    Balto: "How sweet! Uncle Boris!"
    • The best part is that you can't really tell if Balto is being sincere or just having fun.
  • Muk and Luk's snowball fight. Particularly when they hit Boris.
  • This bit after the sled crashes for the first time:
    Nikki: I hit my head on something!
    Kaltag: Yeah! My head!
  • Boris screaming when he sees Balto apparently running in the race at the start (he was actually retrieving Rosy's hat).
    • Shortly after this:
    [gets covered with snow as the sled passes]
  • Boris eating what he thinks is a potato chip, then discovering it's actually a soap flake.
  • After a very long speech from Luk (translated by Muk) about how they're shunned by other bears because they're afraid of water, Boris breaks out the snark.
    Boris: Oh, great, more whimpering. Between you and Balto, is looking like Dostoevsky novel around here! Lighten up!
  • Boris saying he'd like to be part-eagle... because no one would try to eat him.
  • When everyone realizes that Balto and the sled team have returned, the bulldog that lives in the telegraph office gets stuck in the door. Then the owner slams the door open, and when it swings shut, the dog's lower lip has gotten shoved up over his face.

Wolf Quest

  • Balto trying to use the "Mush" command to the wolves in Wolf Quest...only to find out it doesn't work on wolves. Then Balto switches to "I mean, uh, move out!"
  • The small Running Gag of Aleu correcting someone's double negatives. Particularly this moment:
    Yak: You ain't going...[scratches an itch] nowhere!
    Aleu: It's "anywhere", fleabag.
    Balto: Aleu, I hardly think that this is the time to be correcting his grammar.

Wings of Change

  • Everything with Stella's jazzy song "Come up and Fly" as other geese appear as a jazz chorus and her super seductive moves towards Boris.


  • Some years ago, someone did a parody dub of Wolf Quest on YouTube (it was taken down). Highlights from this dub included:
    • Aleu has a man voicing her.
    • Aleu singing "Old Man River", and Jenna telling her to shut up.
    • "Look, her sibling are going off one by one, and no one's taking her [Aleu]! F**k you!" during the "Taking You Home" sequence
    • "I am watching you PEE!"