Funny: Assassins



  • Squeaky Fromme and Sarah Jane Moore's attempt to assassinate Gerald Ford. Key word here being "attempt". Even Gerald Ford had to step in a help them pick up the fallen bullet.
    • Speaking of Sarah Jane Moore: "Shit, I shot it!"
  • Ditto for Hinckley's attempt to kill Ronald Reagan. This Troper's parents claim this was also Ronald Reagan's answer to Jimmy Carter in the debates.
    Reagan: There you go again. There you go again.
    • All of Reagan's responses in the play are from actual quotesfrom when he was actually shot.
      Sorry, Nancy. I forgot to duck.

      I hope that surgeon's a Republican.

      Where'd that kid learn to shoot, the Russian army?
  • Byck's rant at Leonard Bernstein and Nixon through a tape recorder.
    "DIIIIIIIIIIIIIICCCKKK! How ya doin', babe?"
  • Artie Bremer's only line.
    It was a bum rap! My penis made me do it!