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Funny: As Told by Ginger
  • Lois sees a report on an escaped lunatic on the news and yells out "Ha! Put that in a Velour jogging suit and you got Joanne Bishop!"
  • In "No Hope For Courtney" when Courtney has lost her popularity she sits alone at the lunch table all scruffy with messy hair and baggy clothes. A passing student, thinking she's homeless, drops a coin onto the table prompting an angry snarl from her.
    • Also when she finds out Hope hasn't come to her party she starts banging her hands off the floor shouting "why!". Before she can do this, Dodie offers for Courtney to bang off her [Dodie's] hands so she won't injure herself off the floor. Courtney obliges.
  • The end of "Come Back Little Seal Girl"...
    Courtney: How come we never hug, Miranda?
    Miranda: Ew, Courtney.
    Courtney: I'm serious. Let's try it
    Courtney throws her arms around Miranda who looks terrified and disgusted.
    Courtney: (patting Miranda on the back) There there, that's quite enough of that.
  • In "Sleep On It", Hoodsey falls asleep on Courtney's carpet and wakes up the next morning in a puddle of urine to the girls at her slumber party chanting "Bed wetter! Bed wetter!". He desperately tries to clean up his mess with Courtney's teddy bear.
  • In "Fast Reputation", Macie sees a girl dancing at a Wild Teen Party and remarks, "That girl's going to twist her spine all the way to the emergency room."
  • In Part 1 of "Summer at Camp Caprice", when Chet Zipper is unwillingly being dropped off at military camp...
    Chet: No, please! Let me go to Grandma's! (his parents quickly shut the car door and drive off)
  • The entire April Fool's Day episode.
  • In "Blizzard Conditions", when everyone is snowed in during a blizzard...
    Courtney: If anyone has a right to freak out about this whole mess it's me! I'm the one who was trapped in a blizzard, missed a nail appointment and am now stuck wearing pyjamas with feet on an empty stomach!
    Winston: I urged you to have that scone this morning, madam.
    • From the same episode, Courtney has to wear pink footie pyjamas, Blake wears Carl's clothes and Winston has to make do with Lois's fluffy pink bathrobe. Then Courtney decides to raise everyone's spirits by singing her own version of "Green Sleeves". She also orders Winston to sit on a steak to thaw it...
  • "The hand's already dead, right Carl? I mean, there's no other way you can kill it, right?"
  • At Macie's pool party she walks in on two people making out:
    Macie: "Shame on you, Bringer Smith! Your mother teaches Sunday School"
  • Joanne Bishop may be nuts but she gives us some great lines:
    • "Your father says lots of things that never come true"
    • [when Hoodsey says he can't talk to Carl about being embarrassed of showering in gym class] "Of course he wouldn't understand. The child's a budding exhibitionist"
    • "Those clams were pure poison! Carl Foutley gave me rancid shellfish!"
    • "I don't want you! I want the OTHERS!"
    • "Modesty is good. It's what separates us from the lesser primates. Like Carl Foutley."
  • Dodie gives Ginger some advice:
    "Sometimes when my Mom is feeling down, she locks herself in the bathroom and screams into a hand towel"
  • Ginger notices Macie eating potatoes at lunch
    Ginger: Aren't you lactose intolerant?
    Macie: Life is short, Ginger.
  • After Ginger has just been egged by the class.
    Ginger: You know what, I don't care either.
    Dodie: You know, even with egg dripping off her face, she still makes that line work.
  • Macie finds out that she and Miranda are going to be lab partners. Her books abruptly fall off the desk.
    Macie: I hope that's not a sign of things to come.
    Her pencil case falls off too
    Macie: Or that.
  • Courtney gives us this doozy:
    "I am just fascinated by Ginger's um....Gingerisms. Ooh, I like that word. Add it to my list of Courtneyisms"
  • Courtney sits next to Ginger on the bus, forcing Miranda to go for an empty seat next to Macie.
    Macie: Um, I'm saving that for someone.
    Miranda glares.
    Macie: And that someone is you, Miranda.
  • Ginger and Lois clean Courtney's floor so that she gets reflected in it...
    Courtney: I didn't think it was possible!
    Miranda: Neither did I.
    Courtney: I look even better reflected in a floor than in a mirror!
  • When the girls are watching a video in health class. Courtney gets steadily more uncomfortable, resulting in a sudden retching sound from her.
    Miranda: My shoes!
    Courtney: I wasn't prepared for that.
    Miranda: Courtney!
    Courtney: Don't make a scene, Miranda.
  • Courtney enthusiastically singing her own theme song in "Family Therapy", while Miranda forced into being the most deadpan backup singer ever, "It's Courtney. It's Courtney."
  • Ginger and friends discover a pair of high school girls are planning to de-bikini Courtney at an upcoming pool party. Ginger phones her to try and get her to wear a one-piece swimsuit instead.
    Ginger: I hear one-piece is really in this year.
    Courtney: (on the phone) I bet Dodie told you that.
    Dodie folds her arms, offended.
    Courtney: Bikinis are all the rage. I wouldn't be seen without one.
    Macie: Wanna bet?
    • And when they first phone Courtney, she says "I'm modelling my new bathing suit for Miranda" and Miranda gives the best sarcastic smile ever.
  • The episode where everyone thinks Ginger is suicidal (she wrote a poem about a girl who wanted to disappear). At lunch, after her friends attempt a heart-to-heart, Ginger bellows out hilariously "I am not, I repeat, I am NOT Depressed!" - Gilligan Cut to her and Carl moping in the living room.
    Lois: "If one of you doesn't say something, I'm gonna have to call one of those parental help hotlines"
    • The next day Ginger finds Courtney wearing goth make-up and acting like an Emo Teen in hopes of getting extra attention. When Ginger raises her voice and insists she doesn't want the attention, Courtney gets all weepy and says "stop yelling at me! I'm in a fragile emotional state". Ginger then delivers a line made brilliant by Melissa Disney's delivery.
    "Everyone...everyone has lost it! And they think there's something wrong with me!?"
  • Carl is worried he's made a girl in his class disappear. He tries unsuccessfully to get information...
    Carl: Mrs Gordon, do you have any information on the whereabouts of Noelle Sussman?
    Mrs Gordon: Carl Foutley, we are conducting a class about Helen of Troy. I will only accept questions that are relevant to Helen of Troy.
    beat
    Carl: Does Helen of Troy have any information on the whereabouts of Noelle Sussman?
  • Miranda and Darren are in the middle of a lovers' spat. Miranda suddenly stops and realises it's their first fight as a couple - and proceeds to celebrate. And then give Darren directions as to how they're supposed to make up.
  • When Miranda is too busy in her relationship with Darren, Courtney gets all emotional and needy.
    "Miranda was my right hand man. And now that she's gone, all I have left is...the left!"
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