- You got to admit that the scene at the train in which Vlad is counting Anya vs Dimitri and Anya is winning by a LOT has to give you at least a chuckle. If one were to count the score, it's "Dimitri: 3 vs. Anya: 30."
- From around the same part of the film:
Anya: Do you really think I could be royalty?Dimitri: You know I do.Anya: Then stop bossing me around!
- When Dimitri tries to wake up Anya on the train, she throws her hand out, punching Dimitri in the nose.
Anya: Oh, sorry, I thought you were someone else...Oh, it's you. Well, that's okay then.
- During their efforts to escape from the out-of-control train:
Dimitri: Give me a wrench, an ax, anything!Anya puts a lit stick of dynamite into his hand.Dimitri: [doubletakes] That'll work.
- "What do they teach you in those orphanages?"
- Vlad extolling Sophie's many virtues.
Vlad: She is a decadent pastry filled with whipped cream and laughter!Anya: Is this a person or a cream puff?
- Anya's new blue dress and her reaction to it:
Dimitri: I bought you a dress.Anya: You bought me a... tent.Dimitri: What are you looking for?Anya: [with her head inside the dress] The Russian Circus! I think it's still in here!
- Rasputin's freak outs when both his plans to kill Anya fails.
- The following
(Anastasia has left the train cabin after an argument with Dimitri.)
Vlad: (gleefully to Pooka, Anastasia's dog) Oh no! An unspoken attraction?
Dimitri: ATTRACTION?! To that skinny little brat? Have you lost your mind?!
- Before they meet Anya, Dimitri and Vlad are holding an audition for girls to play Anastasia. One prospect is a middle-aged woman with a fur coat and cigarette who says in a sultry voice, "Granmama! It's me, Ana-STASIA!" Complete with a burlesque hip-bump and a rimshot. Their reaction is a combination Head Desk and Face Palm.
- "Three... two... one..." "DIMITRI!" (Fistpump)
- A Funny Background Event during "Learn To Do It": Dimitri on the bike.
- Pooka shielding his eyes when Anya and Dimitri finally kiss.
- On the train, Vlad has just finished forging passports in blue ink when he overhears a conversation that passports are now made in RED ink;
Vlad: That's what I hate about this new government—everything's in red!
- This line:
Bartok: Well, it starts like this, sir, and then you just go CRAZY with the hips, sir!
- Dimitri slipping into Adorkable as he and Anya dance.
Dimitri: I mean [the dress] was nice on the hanger, but it looks great on you. Y-you should wear it.Anya: I am wearing it.Dimitri: (nervous laughter) Oh right, of course.
- They then share an Almost Kiss after the dance before Dimitri backs out and instead tells her "Uh... you're doing fine." and pats her hand.
- When the train is attacked by Rasputin's minions, and the engine and the baggage car have been separated from the dining car and coaches:
Dimitri: What was that?Vladimir: I don't know! But there goes the dining car!
Vladimir: Uh, Dimitri?Dimitri: What?Vladimir: I think someone has flambéed our engine!
- A few seconds later: