Funny / Anastasia

The film:

  • You got to admit that the scene at the train in which Vlad is counting Anya vs Dimitri and Anya is winning by a LOT has to give you at least a chuckle. If one were to count the score, it's "Dimitri: 3 vs. Anya: 30."
    • The part that makes Vlad add to Anya's score:
      Anya: Do you really think I could be royalty?
      Dimitri: You know I do.
      Anya: Then stop bossing me around!
  • When Dimitri tries to wake up Anya on the train, she throws her hand out, punching Dimitri in the nose.
    Anya: Oh, sorry, I thought you were someone else...Oh, it's you. Well, that's okay then.
    • And as they leave:
    Dimitri: I think you broke my nose!
    Anya: (to herself) Men are such babies.
  • During their efforts to escape from the out-of-control train:
    Dimitri: Give me a wrench, an ax, anything!
    Anya puts a lit stick of dynamite into his hand.
    Dimitri: [doubletakes] That'll work!
    • "What do they teach you in those orphanages?"
  • Vlad extolling Sophie's many virtues.
    Vlad: She is a decadent pastry filled with whipped cream and laughter!
    Anya: Is this a person or a cream puff?
  • Anya's new blue dress and her reaction to it:
    Dimitri: I bought you a dress.
    Anya: You bought me a... tent.
    Dimitri: What are you looking for?
    Anya: [with her head inside the dress] The Russian Circus! I think it's still in here!
  • Rasputin's freak outs when both his plans to kill Anya fails.
  • The following:
    (Anastasia has left the train cabin after an argument with Dimitri.)
    Vlad: (gleefully to Pooka, Anastasia's dog) Oh no! An unspoken attraction?
    Dimitri: ATTRACTION?! To that skinny little brat? Have you lost your mind?!
    • And the end, where Anya accidentally smacks an injured Dimitri in the face and then glomps him out of the happiness of seeing that he's still alive. (Also a heartwarming moment).
  • Before they meet Anya, Dimitri and Vlad are holding an audition for girls to play Anastasia. One prospect is a middle-aged woman with a fur coat and cigarette who says in a sultry voice, "Granmama! It's me, Ana-STASIA!" Complete with a burlesque hip-bump and a rimshot. Their reaction is a combination Head Desk and Face Palm.
  • "Three... two... one..." "DIMITRI!" (Fistpump)
  • A Funny Background Event during "Learn To Do It": Dimitri on the bike.
  • Pooka shielding his eyes when Anya and Dimitri finally kiss.
  • On the train, Vlad has just finished forging passports in blue ink when he overhears a conversation that passports are now made in RED ink;
    Vlad: That's what I hate about this new government—everything's in red!
  • This line:
    Bartok: Well, it starts like this, sir, and then you just go CRAZY with the hips, sir!
  • Dimitri slipping into Adorkable as he and Anya dance.
    Dimitri: I mean [the dress] was nice on the hanger, but it looks great on you. Y-you should wear it.
    Anya: I am wearing it.
    Dimitri: (nervous laughter) Oh right, of course.
    • They then share an Almost Kiss after the dance before Dimitri backs out and instead tells her "Uh... you're doing fine." and pats her hand.
  • When the train is attacked by Rasputin's minions, and the engine and the baggage car have been separated from the dining car and coaches:
    Dimitri: What was that?
    Vladimir: I don't know! But there goes the dining car!
    • A few seconds later:
    Vladimir: Uh, Dimitri?
    Dimitri: What?
    Vladimir: I think someone has flambéed our engine!
  • While Anastasia and the Grand Duchess are reminiscing, they find one of Anastasia's drawings.
    "Olga made me so mad; she said it looked like a pig riding a donkey! (Beat) She was right."

The stage version:

  • "Learn To Do It" manages to create a Crowning Moment of Funny not in the original by changing only one word.
    Anastasia: I feel a little foolish. Am I floating?
  • While our heroes are fleeing to Paris, Vlad collapses.
    • Minutes later, when they're on bikes:
    Anastasia: I'll race you!
    Dimitry: [laughing] I've never seen you so happy, Anya!
    Vlad: WAIT FOR ME!
  • When they arrive in France, Vlad kisses the ground.
    Dimitry: It looks like Russia.
    Vlad: France looks nothing like Russia, it looks like France!
    Anastasia: Except Russia is more beautiful.
  • "I'm giving up dancing for Lent." "...Lent just ended." "Next Lent. I'm getting an early start."
  • The Dowager Empress's reaction to learning one of the impostor-Anastasias wants her to pay her rent. "At least that little impostor from Cleveland paid her own rent! [Beat] Where is Cleveland? I never heard of such a place."
  • Dimitry stands on the Dowager Empress's dress to stop her leaving. It's a brief funny moment in an otherwise heart-breaking scene.
  • "How dare you sit without my permission? [Beat] All right, sit; you have my permission."
  • During "In a Crowd of Thousands", Anastasia sings (about young!Dimitry), "He was thin/Not too clean".
    Dimitry: Hey!