Funny: Alvin and the Chipmunks
For The Alvin Show:
- Go here.
- One episode has Alvin suing Brittany on a parody of The Peoples Court. The best gag is how Alvin proved Brittany was faking her injuries.
Alvin: Hey look, it's Don Johnson!
(Brittany leaps out of her wheelchair & excitedly hops up & down)
Brittany: Where? Where?
Alvin: A-ha! See your honor, she was faking! note
- Earlier in the episode, as Alvin suddenly limps towards the courthouse.
Simon: What's with the limp?
Alvin: Just a liiiiittle insurance.
Simon: What happened to "truth, justice, and the American way"?
Alvin: This is the American way.
- In one episode where Alvin was learning to ski, but ignoring Simon's instructions, he ends up tumbling down and creating a giant snowball, which is heading toward Simon and Theodore:
(Theodore runs around in a panic)
Simon: (just stands there) Why can't he just listen for once?
- The Running Gag with T-shirts the episode where Alvin and Simon help Theodore on his history test. The first is when Columbus (Alvin) arrived. Later the pilgrims came and offered T-shirts to the two indians already wearing the shirts Columbus gave them.
Alvin as Custard: How about some T-shirts, chief?
- Then in Custard's Last Stand.
Simon as Sitting Bull: No more stupid T-shirts!
Alvin as Custard: Okay. Then how about some party favors? Whoopie Cushions?
Simon as Sitting Bull: Let's charge him!
Alvin as Custard: No problem. I take credit cards.
Simon as Sitting Bull: No! We charge you!
- From the episode "Snow Wrong":
Brittany: Nobody, but nobody calls my sister a jerk!!!
Jeanette: Uh... but, you do all the time...
Brittany: That's different!
- From "Thinking Cap Trap":
Host: Alvin, what is syntax?
Alvin: Syntax...A tax the church collects from sinners?
- From "The Gang's All Here," Jeanette falls down while roller skating, bringing Brittany down with her.
Jeanette: Sorry, Brittany. I tell my feet where to go, but they just don't listen to me.Brittany: (Grabs Jeanette's foot) GET OFF THE RINK!!!Jeanette: But... maybe they'll listen to you instead.
- In "My Fair Chipette," a bet arose between Alvin and Brittany that Alvin could turn Jeanette into beauty queen material; when he succeeds, Brittany calls off the bet, desperate to win the beauty pageant, but the funny part is when you really stop and think about the following exchange between the two, It Makes Sense in Context.
Brittany: Please take the money, Alvin! I'm a desperate woman!Alvin: Brittany, let go of my leg!
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For the live-action movie with Jason Lee:
- Alvin’s deep voice when he sucks in the helium.
- When Dave first meets the Chipmunks and lays down how things are gonna be run around his house. When..
Alvin: Lemme ask you: have you ever written a song before?
Alvin: And...is that your music stuff outside?
Dave: Yep (Thunder rumbles reminding Dave that his song writing equipment is soaked in the rain).. OH, NO!
Simon: Hurry back!
For The Squeakquel:
- That "purr" sound Simon makes in the second movie when he sees Jeanette.
- When Alvin runs into Brittany at the lunch table
Alvin: I just wanted to warn ya about Ian.Brittany: What? You should be grateful to him and you broke his heart!Alvin: Oh, really? How do I put this gently? He doesn't have one. Oh, and one of the things he did for us was put us in a cage!Brittany: Alvin, he'd never do that!Alvin: Oh, I forgot. Cause you weren't there. Uh, Brit, you'd better watch out.Brittany: I don't need advice from you!Alvin: But, Brittany—Brittany: But nothing, Alvin. Ian's taking us straight to the— [she and her tray slide off the end of the counter] TO-HO-HOP!!!The students laugh 'Alvin: Got it. "Straight to the top." Ironic.Brittany: Yeah, funny! (fake laughter)
- Simon drastically overestimates Ian's intelligence.
Simon: All right, now the third number is always the toughest to crack... I'll assume it's a prime number, but we can't assume-Jeanette: Simon... the first two numbers were one... I'm gonna go with one. () Ah, it worked!
- When Alvin tries to get An amnesiac Simon's attention
Brittany: "Alvin? You’re starting to sound like Dave."
—>Cut to another part of the island as Dave wakes up from hearing the Alvin's echoing scream. Then shrugs and lays back down on the manmade nest. Then Ian tries to nab Dave's macaroni necklace that Theo made him. But Dave, without even opening his eyes, swats his hand at Ian.
- After the kite incident and the 6 Chipmunks are drifting away at sea, Alvin has this to say:
Alvin: In retrospect, This was a bad idea.
As Theo's floating on a donut as a inter tube at the end of the kite string
Theodore: I don't think I can make it much longer! I'm so hungry! Just one bite?
Theodore: A nibble?
Simon: No nibbles!
Theodore: Could I at least lick the glaze?
Simon: The glaze is what's keeping you alive, Theodore! It's high-fat content is creating a water-proof barrier.
Theodore: I'm gonna starve to death!
Jeanette: Actually, there are many ways that would kill you before starvation: dehydration, sunstroke—
Eleanor: [gasps] An island!
Jeanette: No, an island would probably be helpful. So if you see one you should definitely say something.
Brittany: Uh, Jeanette? [gestures towards the island]
- When the exhausted chipmunks arrive on the island
Alvin: We're alive! We're alive!Brittany: Good! 'Cause now...[Beat] I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!Simon: Guys! Guys! Guys! NOBODY is killing anybody! [[grits his teeth at Alvin] No matter how much he deserves it.Alvin: Thanks, Si. Though I could've done without the passive aggression.
- When Simon demonstrates a magnifying glass by using his specs to use the sun's light. When Jeanette compliments him on it being impressive, Simon, distracted, redirects the beam to his foot.
Simon: HOT! HOT! HOT [limps around the beach & jumps into the ocean, then sighs in relief] Ah...that's better...
- When the Chipmunks are fighting over a mango, Alvin swings right into a tree!
Alvin: Ow! My acorns!
Jeanette: STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT! Look at us! One day on this island, and we've become...ANIMALS!
- Culminating in Jeanette stopping the fight holding the mango above her.
- As everyone escapes the island: Even after Ian Hawke's sincere Heel-Face Turn, the Chipmunks still don't quite trust him.
Ian: 'Sup?[reaches out his hand to for a dap from Alvin; Alvin doesn't dap him]]Ian: What? No love for Uncle Ian?Brittany & Eleanor: YOU PUT US IN CAGES!Ian: What?! Seriously? Are we still talking about that?! New subject: I saved Dave's life!Theodore: Alright. But I'll be watching you, Mr. Hawke!
- The Chipmunks seem to have fully forgiven Ian as they perform at the International Music Awards as he and Dave watch backstage
For Road Chip:
- This Hilarious Brick Joke Alvin has arranged a wild birthday party for Dave (without his permission of course)
Alvin: When I say "party," you say "Alvin!" PARTY!Crowd: ALVIN!!!Alvin: PARTY!Crowd: ALVIN!!Alvin: PARTY!Dave (unplugging the microphone) 'ALLLVIIIIINNNNN!!!!!!'Alvin: He-he-he! Whoa! Buzzkill!
- Gets an even louder reprise when Dave finds out the boys left the house, seeing them on TV performing in the Mardi Gras parade
- Miles is holding a coke can in his hand when he sees Ashley for the first time, he gazes so smitten that he unwittingly spills his can of coke—all over Theodore!
- From the episode "Clowning Around":
Simon: Alvin, turn off your electronics! There's a new thing - it's called the energy crisis!
- From the same episode: Apparently Theodore's second-worst fear is the theme song for The Brady Bunch.