Funny / A Giant Sucking Sound

  • The 1996 Second Presidential Debate starts with a silly response by Perot:
    Jim Lehrer: For the second time in US political history, all three major candidates to the Presidency come from the Deep South, including two from Texas. Mr. President, do you consider that this situation increases your competition with Governor Richards ?
    Perot: Well, Jim, I got to say it. No, I donít spend my weekends with Governor Richards, wearing santiags, a Stetson hat, and going to rodeos while singing good olí country.
    • Richards also gets in on the act.
    Richards: Come on, Ross, the world has to know the truth.
  • The Vice-Presidential Debate has some memorable rhetoric.
    Jim Edgar: The main point of my adversaries is that Iím a crook because Iím the Governor of Illinois and all my predecessors were prosecuted for criminal charges. I donít know, itís like saying Senator Boren (of Oklahoma) deals with dust bowls every year or that Senator Kerrey (of Nebraska) only eats corn.
  • Joe Biden announcing his run for the presidency on the Tonight Show with David Letterman.
    David Letterman: And will you stop to be a gaffe machine for a while?
    Joe Biden: Well, I promise not to steal a foreign Leader of the Oppositionís biography this time. I will take Jean Chrťtienís instead. He, at least, has won an election.
  • Ross Perot fingering Saddam for everything.
    CIA Director James Clapper: Yes, Mr. President, Iím sure. This Japanese cult has no relation with Saddam.